Dsielamcir: Mumaixm Rdie bnogels to Jmeas Preosattn. Can you raed tihs? Bucsaee, yes, I did maen to sercw it up lkie tihs.

My Favorite Mistake

Buttercups

"NO!" I screamed. I cradled my still-alive baby in my arms. I laid my head on Natalie's chest and cried into it.

The Erasers gasped in shock, but I hardly noticed. I didn't take notice of anything until I felt a soft hand touch my shoulder and hold me close. Fang. He cried softly, the tears just rolling down his cheeks and not making a sound.

I heard footsteps behind me, and the Director's furious voice shout, "What happened?"

"We didn't mean to kill her, ma'am," an Eraser said.

"She's dead?!" Shocked, now.

"I'm s…," the Eraser tried to continue, but the Director cut her off.

"Well, how did it happen?!" she shrieked, "Did you overuse the chip or did you kill her with your own hands?"

"I think the chip weakened her and then Jared killed her," the Eraser spoke again.

"ARGH!!!!!!!!" the Director shouted, "OUT! OUT! GET OUT! ALL OF YOU!" The Erasers cleared the room and I thought I heard her mutter, "Stupid, uncontrollable Erasers." She wandered over and sat on the edge of the bed and plopped down.

I handed Aiden to Fang and stood up, slamming the door beside me and locking it from the inside, then sliding a door up under it to keep it locked. The Director's face was in her hands, and she didn't look up. I stomped over to her and slapped her. Hard.

She looked up at me, shocked. Her eyes were angry, but they were beginning to portray her fear. She glared at me as she snapped, "What was that for?!"

"You killed her!" I said, not yelling but not making an effort to quiet my voice either, "It's all your fault that she's dead!"

"No, it's not!" the Director argued. A weak argument, if you ask me.

I brought my face close to hers and let the acid drip from my words, "If not for you, that child could have lived a normal life. She could have grown up and had kids. But, no. Instead she lies motionless on the floor in a lab room. Would you have wanted this if you were five?"

She glared back and said, "If not for me, that child would not be alive."

I stared back, surprised, but not letting that show.

"You'd have never met Fang," she explained, her voice wavering a bit for fear of infuriating me.

"Doesn't matter," I said quietly, "She's not alive anymore. And it is your fault."

"Is not!" the Director shouted, "If you just did what you were told –"

"Who brought her here?!" I snapped, "Who put the fucking chip in her brain?! Whose Erasers beat her to death?!"

The Director was quiet. She had no response. I was right, and she knew it. Even if she was right that I never would've met Fang if not for her, she knew she helped a great deal with Natalie's death.

Someone pounded on the door. I turned to Fang and said, "Could you hold that?" He stood and leaned against the door, using all of his weight to hold it shut.

"What are you going to do?" she asked, scared stiff.

"You'll see," I assured her darkly. I was about to knock her into next Tuesday when a voice distracted me.

"Max!" it called, "Max! It's me, Angel! Max, we're all here! Let us in!"

"Are you alone?" I called over my shoulder. I wouldn't let my eyes leave the Director.

"For now, yes!" the Gasman shouted from the outside, "Max, let us in! They're coming!"

Fang opened the door and the rest of my flock came in. Fang resumed holding the door closed and the Gasman helped. It took them a moment to notice the small girl lying on the floor beside Fang's feet.

"Max…is she…?" Angel asked. I nodded. Nudge and Angel broke into tears. Gazzy stared in shock.

"Who?" Iggy asked, his voice frantic.

"Natalie, Iggy," I told him, "Natalie…died."

"Iggy," Angel said quietly, "Pick her up. It's not right – her being on the floor. It's like she's a doll or something." Angel took Iggy's hand and led him to Natalie on the floor. Iggy obeyed Angel and lifted Natalie off of the floor.

I continued to stare at the Director. Finally she said, "Are you going to kill me or what?"

I sighed angrily and said, "I would, but my family is here. I don't think my newborn son should see that." I got close to her face and nearly whispered, "But if you continue to mess with my family, I swear to God, I will kill you. I will rip you limb from limb and deliver your dismembered body to the School so they can see what happens when you piss me off."

The Director gulped and nodded.

"Let's go," I said sourly. We walked to the window and jumped out, flying through the rain. It was cold, and the wind blew at us furiously, but no one dared ask to stop. They all knew how pissed off I was and probably feared I'd dismember and ship their body to the School at this point.

We'd gone a long ways before I finally couldn't take it anymore. I dove down into a clearing in the vast trees and broke down into sobs. I let the rain fall down my back enough to soak me through the wind whistled through the trees.

After five or so minutes of uncontrollable tears, the rational side of my brain took over and I began to question…everything. Was Aiden alright? Who had Aiden? Would he catch a cold with the rain? How about the others? Had they all gotten out? Where were they?

I tried to lift my head, but found I couldn't. I didn't feel at all in control of my mind. I literally felt out of my mind.

Someone's hand brought me back to the surface and I looked up to see who it was.

Fang. Of course. I buried my head back in my hands, not wanting him to see the tear-streak that had undoubtedly formed.

"Where are the oth-others?" I asked, my voice shaking from crying so hard.

"I sent them to find a hotel," Fang told me, "Nudge has Aiden. He cries surprisingly little for a newborn baby."

"W-w-why?" I asked, "Shouldn't we t-tr-try to stay inconsp-sp-spic-icuous?"

"Max, you need a warm place to spend the night. It's pouring out," Fang told me.

I finally lifted my head and looked him in the eyes. "F-F-Fang," I stuttered.

"I'm here, Max," he said. I fell into his arms. He wrapped them tightly around me and patted my back gently.

"Sh-sh-she's gone," I gasped out, "I wanted her to have a g-good, long life, b-but she's g-g-gone."

"Max–," he started, but I didn't give him the chance to finish.

"It's all m-my fault, isn't it?" I asked him, "It's m-my fault she d-di-died. I should have been watching her more. I was t-too preoccupied with Ai-d-den."

"I thought you decided it was the Director's fault," he reminded me.

"It was," I agreed, "But it was mine, too."

We sat in silence for a long time. Finally, I said, "Where is she?"

"Iggy and Nudge buried her under a tree the cemetery," he said, "Nudge and Angel are planning a funeral as we speak."

I nodded into his shoulder. "She would've liked that," I muttered. We were quiet for a while, then I said, "Fang?"

"Yeah," he said just as quietly as I had.

"We need to pick buttercups. Those were her favorites," I told him.

He nodded into my shoulder and I could feel his cheek rise into a smile, "Yeah. We'll all go out and pick some buttercups."

8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8

"Tonight we commemorate Natalie Ride, who was born on July 15, 2009 and passed on November 16, 2014," Fang said. It was twilight out. The sun was just setting, casting pinks and yellows and oranges into the sky.

"She died in battle," Angel said, "So we bought an American flag down at the store to lay over her grave." Iggy pulled an American flag sticker from his pocket and peeled the backing off of it. He stuck it on the gravestone which had been carved "Natalie Ride: 2009-2014." I smiled a little. It was so commemorative of the five-year-old who lay beneath it.

"She taught us a valuable lesson," Nudge continued, suddenly being the only one able to speak from the lumps in all of our throats, "How to have fun and fight hard. She fought hard until the end and died an unfair death."

I choked on a cry. The tears fell from where I had worked so hard to keep them in my eyes.

We spent the funeral talking about Natalie: what she liked, what she hated, funny moments, everything. We ended the ceremony by eating celery sticks and peanut butter, Natalie's favorite food.

That night, after everyone had gone to bed, I got up as quietly as I could and walked toward the door.

"Where are you going?" Fang asked.

Shit! I pivoted to face him and said, "No where. Just…out…for a little while."

"Max," Fang started.

"What?"

"I don't think you should go," he said quietly.

This angered me, "Why not?!" He stayed silent. I glared at him and snapped, "What are you so afraid of?"

"You not coming back," he muttered.

I stared at him in disbelief. "You think I'm going to commit suicide?"

He nodded slowly.

"Fang, no," I said quietly, "I'm going to…see her."

He gave me a quizzical look.

"I want to spend the night by her grave," I told him quietly.

"I'll come with you," he offered.

I shook my head, "No, thank you. I need to go alone."

He looked reluctant to let me go.

"If I'm not back in a half an hour, come get me," I told him. He still looked reluctant, but nodded.

I got to the gravesite as slowly as I could. I wanted to go, but then again I didn't. As I neared the tree we'd buried her under, I paused. My baby is in the ground below me, I thought, This is so wrong. How did it get this sucky?

Max, the Voice said inside my head.

I glared mentally, What? I'm not doing anything wrong. I'm going to see my dead baby. A lump came up my throat as I said it.

Max, the Voice repeated, I – I'm sorry. I'd never have thought things would've gotten this far. I wish I could…undo it.

I sighed at him, So do I. Now are you done?

No, Jeb said, I just wanted to say…please don't think I didn't love Natalie like Valencia Martinez did. She was my first granddaughter, after all.

I looked at the ground, ashamed that I'd thought he would lecture me. After a long time, I said, It's OK, Jeb. You couldn't have known.

And Max? Jeb continued, I've decided to remove myself from Aiden's life completely. I don't want you to lose another child on my account.

Jeb… I started. But he was already gone.

I lifted my head to look at the grave, feeling empowered by the fact that I'd hurt Jeb that much and forced him to remove himself from his grandchild's life. I strode out to the grave and stopped, staring. The lump in my throat burst out as I stared at it.

Buttercups bloomed all over it. Tears streamed from my eyes as I sat down amongst the flowers.

"Max…" I heard a whisper in the wind. My head jerked over in the direction it came from, but no one was there. I let the tears flow freely as I sat there with my daughter.

8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8:8

It's not over yet! I'm going to have one or two more chapters as a closer, then I am going to do a Frequently Asked Questions chapter. Please don't send me your question just yet, but be thinking about them and send them in the last chapter. I will give you another reminder then.

I'm tired and my bro needs the compooper, so I gotta go!

-Alyson May Who Depressed Herself By Writing This Chapter-