NOTE: This story has alternating POVs. in an attempt to make things easier and not have it switch 50 times, Eric gives his views and then Dina gives hers of the same events. We hope there is no confusion.

as always: most of these characters are not mine, there are adult themes and most are graphic, and this is only fiction. I think I've explained in other chapters the differences between vampire/human D/s relationships and human/human ones - so please don't use this an at home guide.

This chapter features a punishment.

There might be content some readers feel uncomfortable with. read at your own risk.

and please read and review (reviews keep stories moving...)

DINA POV

Inhale… Exhale… Inhale… Exhale… "Breathe!" I told myself. "Breathe! Concentrate! In… Out… In… Out…" I said these words over and over to myself even though my mouth could not move to form the words and the sounds produced by my vocal cords never got past the back of my throat. I had started to shiver almost immediately after Eric had left me and I hadn't stopped. It was so dark, and I was so cold!

I had been chained to this pole for hours. I knew he'd be back before dawn – he said he would. But the more time went on – not that I could really tell, with this blindfold on – the more fearful I became. What if I had to use the bathroom and couldn't control myself? What if dawn had come and gone? What if he went to rest and left me? What if he planned to keep me like this until tomorrow? I had lied to him; lying to me might teach a fair lesson.

"Oh no; not again!" I screamed silently as for the umpteenth time my left thigh threatened to cramp.

Just like every other time it happened, I tried unsuccessfully to shift my weight or move my leg to bring it some relief. But of course I couldn't. I quit doing that. I didn't even wiggle my toes. Even my head couldn't move between the posture collar and whatever Eric has used to fasten my harness to the pole. I learned not to resist. I had no idea what part of my punishment was an add on, but I was sure I should have just let him bind and gag me upstairs. And the way my breast stung made me wish I could have let him put the posture collar on me without fighting him.

Now I knew why Eric was so widely feared by human and Vampire alike. He did things thoroughly, with results as close to perfection as possible. Once he had you, he made sure he kept you. You stayed exactly where he put you, thinking and feeling the exact things he wanted you to think and feel. Or at least that was how it was in my case.

He said I tried to immobilize him when I didn't tell him what Bobby had done to me. So he was immobilizing me to think about it. And I was, absolutely immobilized. I could move my feet a little bit but now they hurt from my dragging the toes around on the hard concrete floor. I couldn't move my fingers because of the thick padding in the mitten holding both of my hands captive at the bottom of the arm binder. I couldn't open my eyes because of the blindfold's padding. I couldn't turn my head. I couldn't open my mouth or move my jaw from side to side.

I knew that I betrayed his trust. I did put myself in danger – and probably others by not getting bobby away from who ever Eric sent him to see. Leila spoke so gently. I didn't think she could fight off that leech. And maybe…maybe I was overestimating my plan to beat him up if he touched me.

I should not have tried to stop him from protecting me. I was grateful for his protection but I couldn't have it only when I thought it suited me. It was an all-or-nothing deal. I couldn't wait to tell Eric how I had finally realized this, whenever it was that he would finally want to hear my voice again.

When he came to get me I would be here, just exactly where he put me. At least he wasn't going to kill me. The fear his enemies must feel when he has them and they know they can't escape, and that he will be coming for them! Did Bobby know what was going to happen to him? Had Eric already locked him up somewhere to think about what he had done to me before Eric killed him? So help me, I was not going to ask. Eric was angry enough at me without me showing concern for the man who had caused this problem in the first place. It was none of my business. I had learned my lesson.

Eric was everything to me, the best thing that had ever happened to me, and I was not about to risk what I had with him over that slimy little weasel any more than I already had. But would Eric forgive me? How long would I have to pay before we could put this behind us? He had explained why he was being so harsh with me. While I didn't necessarily agree with his methods, they were his methods and I would accept them as I had accepted everything else about him.

I had agreed to this Dominant/submissive relationship never dreaming that something like this could happen. I had never had ropes, chains, or straps put on me before, even jokingly, and now I seemed to wear them as often as I wore clothes, if not more so. Had it truly been less than two weeks ago that those troublemaking Vampires had come into Merlotte's?

Now that I'd had time to think about it, Eric had accepted the situation and claimed me as actually his far more easily than normal from someone like him. He should have reacted with anger at my presumptuousness, but instead it was like Christmas had come early for him. Could it be that our relationship was something he actually wanted before that fateful night? If so, why hadn't he approached me? He knew I was attracted to him; either that or he was blind. It hadn't taken me only a week to fall in love with Eric Northman. That had happened a long time ago from the little bit of time that I'd spent around him. Had I been that transparent?

I was sure the clock was ticking away. It was hard to think after a while. I fought to keep my panic at bay – I kinda had to. Eric probably went to the bar; that's why he'd been out for so long. I'd been keeping him busy. This was a great time for him to go handle his area and his business. I was stiff. I was sore. I was so cold. I just wanted this to be over. I was sure I was sorry and wouldn't do it again. I had times to think about this and even wonder about Eric's initial reaction to being with me. My brain hurt from thinking and my body hurt from being bound. There was no escape from the discomfort.

A few times tonight I had succumbed to what I now called "the power shakes," and each time it happened I hoped it was the last. My heart leaped into my throat and started to pound loudly, goose bumps raised on my skin and my breathing became shallow. "In… Out… In… Out…" I had to concentrate to breathe. How long had Eric been gone? It had to be hours by now! What if dawn had come and gone? What if he had left me here for the day? How would I know if it was day? What if I had to use the bathroom and couldn't control myself? "Inhale! Exhale! Inhale! Exhale! Concentrate!" I was again warding off a full-scale panic attack!

ERIC POV

I was going through what felt like hundreds of pairs of shoes to see if any were of quality before arbitrarily throwing them all out, when I felt it again. Dina was starting to panic again, for the sixth time. I stopped what I was doing and grabbed up the tablet, quickly zooming in on her face and chest. Her chest was moving in and out rapidly; she was breathing hard! My first instinct was to run to her but I stifled that urge.

She was being punished. I had to give her time to think about what she had done and why she could not do it again. I had to give her enough time to reason it all out. But she had been staving off panic attacks almost since the first moment I had arrived upstairs and opened the first box. I was very proud of her!

She had stopped the previous ones. I hoped she would be able to stop this one too. As a precaution I moved toward the hidden entrance to the lair. I would be at her side in less than a second if things got serious. Her shaking and chest heaving did not stop right away. I could see the muscles of her neck and shoulders straining against my restraints to gain some freedom, but she would not succeed. I had too much practice in binding people. If I did not want you to move, you would not move, and she was not moving.

I decided I didn't like the way she was straining and struggling. I would intervene, but not by rescuing her. Yes, I had said I would become angry if she got herself worked up, but the bond would have told me if she was up to any trickery. I used my mind to compel her again, hoping that she would not realize it was me. I was as subtle as I could be sending my soothing touch to her mind, just as she reached out to me.

DINA POV

It was getting out of control and I could feel my stomach start to convulse. I had to stop this from going any farther! More punishment be damned! I wanted to be alive to take it! I needed Eric! My heart drummed louder than a hundred marching bands playing all at once and I hoped I could reach past the chaos.

Eric! Eric! Help me! Please! These were not words but feelings.

I was conceding defeat. I needed him. I hoped he would answer.

The clamor was starting to worsen! Now a thousand bass speakers added their pulsing to the mix. It rose higher and higher, a crescendo of crashing elephants running through the jungle, running into tall trees but leaving nothing but twigs and splinters in their wake.

But then, like the call of Tarzan in one of those movies, I "heard" him answer me. As it had earlier tonight when he had come to my aid, it felt like a miracle. It had to be him. It came from the outside and was strong enough to cut off the panic attack at the pass. It took several minutes for my breathing to become normal again but it felt like he was there again with his hand on my chest.

"In, out, in, out…" I hoped he wasn't too angry with me.

In only a matter of minutes I was back to being cold, trying in vain to pick up one or the other of my bruised knees off of the floor. Had he forgotten to pay the electric bill, or had he turned the temperature in the room way down to keep me awake? I was tired, but the temperature would not allow me to relax my muscles enough to make sleep possible. I continued to pine for Eric, hoping he would come soon.

I had seen the error of my ways. I would never again try to tell Eric half truths to try to manipulate a situation and keep him from acting. He considered that a lie, and if sitting here in the dark wearing the world's most uncomfortable gag had taught me anything, it was never to lie to Eric.

He would know anyway if I tried; we had our bond between us. But I didn't plan to try. I respected him enough to understand now the position lying or telling half truths could put him in. He deserved better. I wondered if he would cast me out. Maybe this time away from me had caused him to reconsider our situation. What if he was right now packing what little belongings I still had, and preparing to put me out on the street? It was only a matter of time before he realized he could have anyone and I couldn't even be honest with him or behave as his submissive. This thought threatened to start another panic attack in me.

ERIC POV

Dina's belongings were proving to be quite mundane for the most part. It saddened me to see how obviously poor she was. She had quite a lot of jewelry, if you could call it that. None of it was any quality at all. There were a lot of plastic and beaded items that I would not have thought suitable for a grown woman, and she seemed to have an affinity for peace signs. There were some clay pieces that were rainbow colored. All of the chains and other metal pieces were cheap nickel plated with silver or gold. The silver items weren't even silver enough to react with my skin!

There were a couple of items that appealed to me, and I set them aside in a wooden jewelry box I had found with wolves on the lid. I wasn't surprised. I had seen a shirt with wolves on it as well. I also knew from her pictures she had dogs before. Dogs she must have loved very much. I had a feeling she'd want to keep this box. The carving, including the one cut out wolf that made it '3D', reminded me of something I might have made long ago in my human days. Of course, I didn't have the great paints modern humans did or machines to put prints on wood, but it was obviously skillfully crafted and real wood.

She had a bracelet made of faux leather, white with a red stitching pattern. It had a blue square with a red "C" in the middle, and closed with a toggle of a little baseball and a loop. I knew she was originally from Chicago and I recognized that this might mean something to her. One necklace consisted of a rainbow with metal rings attached, a 3-layered charm with more plated silver and slivers of actual turquoise, and a tiny heart. This seemed quaint to me and reminded me of her. I would see if I could reproduce the piece in real materials. Tucked away in a tiny velvet bag I found a gold cross. This surprisingly was real 24K gold, and the way she had it separated from everything else led me to believe that it might have a deeper meaning.

It is a myth that crosses repel or burn Vampires. We propagated that lie many centuries ago to scare humans. It was a joke to us that they believed their emblems could protect them from us. But also, if one of us happened to be caught and questioned, the fact that we could touch a cross without injury would fool them into letting us go.

I put the rest of Dina's jewelry in the charity pile. I thought a human child might enjoy some of it. I had been going back and forth between her clothes and other things, because she had so many clothes. But like her jewelry, none of her clothing was of good quality. I had found the two pairs of black slacks I had purchased for her to work in, and I kept those. She would not work in them again but I could see no reason not to keep good clothing around. This time I found something rather interesting. It was a pair of jeans that I didn't think I had ever seen her wear (and I had observed her from a distance on quite a few occasions without her knowledge). These were ripped and the knees were grass-stained. This spoke to me of some sentimentality surrounding them. My Dina wore her heart on her sleeve sometimes and this didn't surprise me at all. I carefully bagged them in clear plastic and set them in the "to be discussed" pile.

I found yet another box of shoes and opened it, and these were interesting. I found a pair of pumps that had to be 5" high. They were clear and had a switch just in front of the heel. When I flipped the switch, little LED lights blinked on, around the edges of the sole, around the back and down the heel! I was very intrigued as to why my Dina had these and where she had gotten them. I would definitely be asking her to model them for me. Unfortunately, they were of cheap quality just like her other shoes. The only other shoes I considered worth keeping were a pair of brand new "New Balance" walking shoes. They had the new curved soles for tightening up the legs. My Dina didn't need any help where her legs were concerned but these were probably very comfortable. She could wear them when we went on outings like to the grocery store. There were better brands, but I was comfortable with this one. I set aside the rest of her shoes for charity.

Another interesting box I found contained her lingerie – if you could call it that. My girl was definitely the "comfort-over-style" type when it came to what she slept in I had to dig to find a single trace of silk or lace anywhere. And the only ones I found were rainbow, leopard print, or had peace signs on them. Maybe my human had an obsession. Instead I found an overabundance of plain cotton panties and lots of boyshorts. I actually liked boyshorts, but I preferred the fancier ones. Of course, I would rarely allow her any type of panties when in my presence. I wanted to be able to lay her back and just push into her whenever I got the urge, and that was quite often. She certainly hadn't objected so far!

Her entire collection went into the trash pile. Her oversized T-shirt collection went to the charity pile. She did, however, have some very enticing-looking bras. With breasts like hers, I could understand why she would want to showcase them. I liked a woman's breasts wrapped up in a pretty package, so I went through them and chose the ones I liked for her to model for me. Then one stopped me cold... I actually couldn't figure out what it was at first. It had the straps to go over the shoulders and it had the part that fastened in back, but in the front was almost nothing! There was a piece that looked like it would contour the undersides of the breasts and maybe support them. Was this a bra that left the breasts uncovered? I was intrigued. That one went into the "to-be-modeled" pile for sure!

She had a large number of old journals and notebooks full of her writing. Some of them dated back to when she was quite young. She had preserved the older ones in plastic bags. I could tell that her writing was significant to her. I thumbed through several that were not covered in plastic. I would save all of them for her, and I would read them. I wondered if she knew that I'd read every paper she had saved in her laptop. Many of her beliefs and opinions were similar to mine, while others differed greatly. I looked forward to some lively discussions throughout the coming years.

She was, unfortunately, correct that many people (Bobby Burnham being one) didn't look past the waitress to find the sensitive, well-spoken, intelligent woman behind her. It had been obvious to me the first time we had spoken how intelligent she was. I had wanted to know more. She was much different than Sookie in that respect. Sookie was smart and had read a lot, but she was definitely the product of a small southern town. She didn't know much about what was beyond the borders of Louisiana. The townspeople had made her feel like something was wrong with her and she had just accepted that. In many ways, Sookie and Bill were well-suited for each other. He, too, was simple and unsophisticated. He was also dumb as a box of rocks, in my opinion.

By contrast, Dina had been colored by the places where she had lived and traveled. She had just the slightest trace of the Chicago accent when she spoke, and was very fortunate to have been able to escape the obligatory southern drawl that people who'd grown up around here had affected. I had lived in this region of the world for hundreds of years and had seen it grow into what it was now. I couldn't wait to share those stories with Dina. She was the first person since Pam whom I had wanted to share my history with. A Vampire normally has to be on his guard at all times. You couldn't give away too much of yourself or it would inevitably be used against you, sometimes hundreds of years later, for we remember everything. My own speech still held traces of the Norse accent that I had been born with. I was sure that Dina would be an excellent student when it came to learning new languages, and I intended to teach many to her.

None of Dina's furniture had been brought here; there was no room for it in the small space of the lair below. Her bedding was here, however. Her sheets and blankets would not fit on my custom-sized bed, but there was one decorative pillow that I'd seen her hugging a lot at night when she was alone. It was about three feet long and cylindrical, about a foot in diameter. It was made of plush fleece and was very soft. I had often been jealous of that pillow and wanted to take its place. Now that she was sleeping in my bed every day, I could afford to be generous. I would bring it back and put it on our bed for her. But if she started paying more attention to it than me, out it would go! I would ask her if she wanted to keep her blanket or comforter for lying around on the couch.

I had finally gone through all of her boxes, feeling privileged to have been able to look in on this window of my Dina's life that had now closed. What lay ahead was her future with me. I had not unpacked anything, just rearranged and repacked. I had a surprise for her. I made the decision that she should be mine, long before she 'offered' herself to me at Merlottes. I knew that the lair I occupied here was not really suited for two people, be they both Vampires, humans, or one of each. I had visited my other residences to see which one would be more suitable for the two of us. The one I had chosen was a little bit farther out of town than this one, but it was actually a shorter distance from Fangtasia. The square footage was more than double what this one was, and the lair had a full kitchen and full bathroom facilities for a human. More than one bathroom facility, actually. It had a space to do laundry, where this one did not, and it had an elevator to the lair instead of stairs. The security there was better. There were some unused rooms in that lair, and I was having them customized.

Dina would have her own room there, a place where she could work on her school assignments or journal, or look at the web sites I was currently assigning to her. There would be a place for all of her books. I had made note of the titles of all of the books she had and had set some of my minions on a quest to find a brand new first edition of each, no matter the cost. If it was an older book, a brand new one might not be possible, but I wanted the first edition. Her books were well-used, tattered and torn. There was a huge living space with a fireplace and I had designed a great area for us to play.

After tonight I knew I would have to designate some areas for punishment and I had some things in mind. There was enough room, I thought, for an isolation closet and a room full of equipment. There was another huge room that I had ordered equipment for, but that room was for pleasure. One would be dark, cold, and frightening, while the other would be open and fun. Like this house, I would not allow Dina to know where the locations of the punishment rooms were. I didn't want her to get curious and go look at them. She would never see the rooms. She would always be blindfolded and there were no lights in the rooms. I could see just fine in the dark. I planned on breaking the news to her tonight after we settled the issue of this punishment.

Speaking of punishment, finally finished with the last box, it was time to go get Dina and release her from her bindings. Working at Vampire speed, it had only taken me a little over two hours to go through her things. I was sure she thought it had been much longer. I was glad. When I had contemplated this arrangement at first, I had known there would be a time when I would have to punish her for different things. At the time, it had excited me, and I thought I would enjoy her terror during her punishment and then fuck her afterward and take her blood. Now that it had actually happened, I would do no such thing. I hadn't counted on caring for her as much as I did, or the sorrow I would feel when I hurt her.

I made my way downstairs, locking all the security doors behind me as I went. She was shivering as I watched her on my tablet. Perhaps 55 degrees had been too cold. I had started to make it 45. I was glad I had changed my mind. I left the tablet in my office and opened the door, which was behind the bathroom. Even though she couldn't hear me, I stepped in quietly and stood there for a moment. Now that I could see her more clearly, I felt even more terrible. There were streaks on the leather below her nose as though her nose had run. She shivered constantly and I could see her muscles working against the bindings trying to move, even though they could not. Behind her gag I could hear tiny whispers of air that I knew instinctively would be cries or whimpers if I could hear them.

I didn't want to startle her, so I slowly knelt in front of her and lightly touched her shoulders. She still started violently as I touched her. I squeezed her shoulders gently and kept contact as I moved around behind her. I ran my hands over the arm binders a few times, knowing that she could feel my touch through them. First I removed the weighted spreader bar from between her ankles. I could see that she had scraped her toes and the tops of her feet. I bloodied my finger with a fang and rubbed my blood into each scrape until it disappeared. Then I worked each ankle for a few seconds to get the stiffness out, and placed a cloth I pulled from my back pocket beneath her feet to avoid any more scrapes. I started at the bottom and unbuckled each strap that I had wrapped around her body, all the way to her shoulders. This provided a little bit of relief to her because she could move slightly, though not much. I could feel her gratitude at that small freedom through the bond.

The last thing I did in there was cut each of the zip ties holding her attached to the pole. I knew before it happened that she would fall as soon as she no longer had its support, so I easily caught her in my arms as she fell forward. I lifted her into my arms and carried her bridal-style out of the room. I gently laid her sideways on the couch, all the way against the back, and piled a few pillows in front of her so she wouldn't roll off. I took out an earplug then, gently cupping the back of her head with my palm when my touch startled her. I knew this was a natural reaction considering her previous isolation and didn't take offense.

"Dina, I will be right back. Stay here. Do not try to get up." She nodded at me, and I bent to kiss her forehead where none of the harness's leather was covering her skin. I grabbed a throw blanket that she used often and covered her with it, and then I quickly retrieved the straps and equipment from the punishment room and relocked the door, once again hiding its location from Dina. On the way through the bathroom, I grabbed a washcloth and wet it with hot water. I dumped everything into the chest and hurried back to take care of her. The sound of her breathing had already greatly improved and I was relieved. I removed both earplugs from her ears and gently sat her up, leaning against me. I put my arms around her for a few seconds.

"I am proud of you, Dear One," I told her softly. "You withstood your punishment bravely."

She couldn't do much to acknowledge my words, so she leaned in my direction. "I will remove everything now," I assured her.

I started with the arm binders, the most obvious source of her current discomfort. They would have made her arms and shoulders ache the entire time, and she would feel it now as I removed them. I could feel her body relax as I quickly unlaced the binders with my nimble Vampire fingers, then I pulled her back and reached around her to unbuckle the straps at her chest. I could still see the hand print from where I had slapped her. I thought I had only swatted her. Had I really hurt her? I leaned around her and gently kissed, then rubbed the spot where the print was. It lightened then; perhaps it was because her flesh had been cold that the mark had stayed. I gently pulled the big glove off of her arms to fully release her from the binder; she sighed and her body sagged. I didn't want her hands entirely free yet, so I quickly reached into my back pocket and locked the handcuffs back on to her wrists.

"This is only for a few more moments," I told her, and she nodded, squeezing my hands with her tired fingers. I rubbed her hands gently for a few seconds and then reached for the posture collar, unlocking it and setting it aside. I turned her head gently right and then left a couple of times to make sure she was all right before moving to the gag. I opened the front and released the pressure, making all of the air leak out, the balloon inside deflating. She whimpered in relief, and I actually heard her. Then I removed the blindfold from her eyes. She blinked a few times in the light but then gazed at me, pleading with me to get the rest of the gag off of her. Or so I guessed.

I started with the chin strap, then unbuckled the side straps, and finally the top one. "Open your mouth slowly," I cautioned her.

She did as I said, and I was able to gently pull the rubber piece out from between her cheeks and teeth. Immediately I kissed her on both cheeks, then I started working her jaw gently with both of my hands to loosen it back up. It must be very stiff, having been severely confined by that gag for 2 ¾ hours. I gently applied the now lukewarm washcloth to her face, hoping to soothe her a little. Tears appeared in her eyes and she leaned forward, beginning to sob. I quickly unlocked the handcuffs and removed them from her wrists and she fell into my arms, sobbing hard and clinging to me. I was sitting sideways on the cushions and she wrapped both her arms and her legs around me. But she wasn't saying anything!

Then, I remembered. I had ordered her not to speak until I said she could speak again. "You may speak to me, Dear One," I said softly, kissing her eyelids and licking her tears from her face.

"I'm sorry Eric!" she sobbed. "I won't lie to you ever again! I promise! I won't try to keep you from knowing about things! I won't try to stop you from doing what you have to do! I'll respect your authority, your judgment!"

She rattled all of this off to me so quickly that it sounded like she had rehearsed it in her head for when she could finally tell me. "I know. I know," I said, rocking her like a child. I could hear her sincerity in her voice, but only time would tell if she could truly keep those promises.

"Will you ever forgive me?" she whispered, and I could see her working to get her emotions under control.

"Let it out, Dina! It's all right." I told her. "You are forgiven. I am no longer angry with you." She was still cold, and shaking.

I wanted to get some clothes on her – and I stopped for a few seconds to consider the irony of that – so I picked her up, still wrapped around me, and carried her to the bathroom. I knew she might have human needs, so I set her on the toilet and tried to dislodge her arms and legs from me to give her some privacy. She wouldn't let go even though her bladder started to empty itself the moment I sat her down. She had previously refused to let me see her doing this, and so I knew something powerful had broken inside of her. I stroked her hair as she grabbed handfuls of mine and held on tight.

"Let me get you dressed," I insisted, finally able to get her to unwrap herself from around me. "I am only going to stand up and come right back. I won't leave the room."

She nodded and while I got down the pajama set I had prepared for her, she used some of that paper humans buy to clean herself up and wipe her face. Then she blew her nose a couple of times. "I don't know why I'm acting this way," she told me, now seeming to feel embarrassed. I rewet the cloth with warm water while I was up.

"Has anyone ever punished you so harshly for anything, ever before?" I asked, squatting down and applying the warm cloth to the handprint on her breast that I could still see. She sighed and leaned forward to shyly kiss my cheek, as if she wondered if her kiss would be welcome. I removed the washcloth and started pulling the soft cotton top over her arms and head before covering her body with it. She hugged herself, touching its softness and looking at me in surprise. "I wanted you to be comfortable," I explained and grinned.

She shook her head then. "I've never been through anything like that, no." Then she hung her head. "I've never deserved it before." She started to stand up, but I pushed her gently back.

"Here, put these on," I insisted.

She looked at me like I'd grown another head. "You are putting bottoms on me?"

I allowed her to stand and pulled them on, and then I pulled up her top to admire the way they looked. "Beautiful!" I said. Then I swung her up into my arms and carried her toward the bedroom. "I can't think about myself and sex 24 hours a day." I told her. "Tonight is about taking care of you."

A/N: The next section shows Dina's POV but goes back to the moment when Eric brought her to the couch. I wanted to show both POVs during this time when he took care of her.

DINA POV

Eric carried me, with my arms still bound and the terrible gag still strapped to my head. I wished I could wrap my arms around him, if only to be sure I had him as tightly as he had me. He laid me on what I assumed was the couch. I was surrounded by softness. He touched me to remove my earplug. I flinched away. I wasn't afraid of him, but not being able to see, hear, or speak made my reflexes hypersensitive. My mind knew my body had no defense and wanted me to pull away from anything and everything.

I calmed myself and he told me stay where I was. I could do that. I felt his lips against my head and instantly felt better. He then covered me and my body began to heat up. I was so cold. The pain was going away bit by bit. I stretched out my legs and felt the blood rush through them. I relaxed, knowing my hell was over.

He sat me down and gave me the kind words I longed for. Perhaps I was silly to think he wouldn't want me. I was very emotional and let that get the better of me. I moved toward him, because as nice as his words were, I wanted to be free if it was over. He moved to undo the bindings. God, I was so sore. Once again, I felt my nerves come alive and the constricted blood move freely thought my veins. When he undid the buckles around my chest that held the arm binder in place, I sighed against my gag in sweet relief. He gently touched the place on my breast where he struck me for resisting. I felt his cool lips touch the area. He finally began to slide the bag off of my arms and I knew heaven in that moment. Heaven was a short thing as those same familiar cuffs locked around my wrists.

"This is only for a few more moments." He told me. I nodded and squeezed his hands with mine. I could handle a few moments.

He took off the posture collar and then began to work on the gag. He turned my head all angles and checked carefully for any damage. It was both wonderful and agonizing. I can't explain how much better I felt when he released the air in the gag. He then took off the blindfold. I stared at him. I wanted to be out of pain and I wanted to talk to him; tell him I learned my lesson.

Eric undid each buckle and rubbed that part of my head after doing so. I slowly flexed my muscles. Finally, he was ready to take the gag out. He warned me to move slow and I nodded. I knew it might hurt like hell if we pull it out too fast.

My mouth was finally free. Eric kissed both of my cheeks and started to clean my face with a washcloth. Eric. My "cruel, ruthless" Vampire. ... That was it for me. Everything I held in, was coming out. His hands massaged my cheeks and the tears spilled from my eyes. He finally removed those awful cuffs. He caught me as I fell into him sobbing loudly. My body shook. I let it all go and barely even considered being embarrassed by my display. Or the fact that I was getting Eric wet with my human 'leaking', as Pam called it.

I wrapped my whole self around him. I cried, but didn't speak. He had told me to wait. I would not be punished again. I felt like one of those hardasses who say they'll die before they go back to prison.

"You may speak to me, Dear One." His lips kissed my eyes and his tongue sneaked out to taste my tears.

Now was my moment. Everything I came to realize. Everything I had to say to him.

"I'm sorry Eric!" I cried to him, "I won't lie to you ever again! I promise! I won't try to keep you from knowing about things! I won't try to stop you from doing what you have to do! I'll respect your authority, your judgment!"

I hope he believed me. I hoped he forgave me. I didn't want him to let me go. This wasn't like the clinginess I had been dealing with, this was an obsessive need to have him touching me. It felt like my life depended on it. I just wanted everything to be okay.

"I know. I know," He said as he rocked me.

"Will you ever forgive me?" I whispered, scared of my own voice and his answer.

He told me I was forgiven and the crying began again. I was so relieved. I had so much bottled up inside. God, my life was so hard and different now. All of the pressure, the pain, the fear, and uncertainty came out in waves.

He lifted me and I didn't even think to ask where we were going. I just held him. I thought a million things. I wondered how I would get through this. One punishment and I was half way crazy afterward. The same thoughts about Eric not wanting me came back. I fought them off as best I could….we ended up in the bathroom. He sat me down, but I wouldn't release him. I suddenly realized I had to go. And it just happened. Maybe I had been holding it. I had sworn to myself I would never do this in front of Eric. I mean, my God, even human men didn't always like this. How would my Vamp deal with it?

He got away from me but at least he promised to stay in the room. I began to clean myself up. I was a fucking mess.

"I don't know why I'm acting this way," I told him honestly, what the fuck was wrong with me?

"Has anyone ever punished you so harshly for anything, ever before?" He asked as he took that same washcloth, now warmer, and held it against the spot on my breast where he had slapped me. I was overwhelmed. What would he do if I tried to kiss his cheek? I tentatively leaned forward and touched my lips to his cool skin. He didn't react; instead he pulled a shirt over my head. It felt soft and warm. I crossed my arms and touched both sleeves. I traced my finger tips over the fabric. This wasn't my typical outfit when I was with Eric. I looked at him curiously.

"I wanted you to be comfortable," He replied, without me needing to voice my question. Then he grinned. That made me feel like we might be able to put this past us.

I smiled softy and remembered his question. I shook my head "I've never been through anything like that, no."

And I was responsible for this whole thing. What is a relationship without trust? With lies? I dropped my head down. "I've never deserved it before."

I started to stand, but he stopped me.

"Here, put these on."

I looked at what he held in his hands. What was going on here? Did I walk into the damn twilight zone? I looked at him with my eyes bugging out and my jaw open. "You are putting bottoms on me?" He didn't answer but was looking at me expectantly. I put them on quickly. Boyshorts, in the same soft, white material as the top.

He led me to the mirror and pulled the shirt up to look at them on me. "Beautiful!" He exclaimed.

Before I could think about this weird turn of events, Eric was lifting me up and carrying me to our bed. "I can't think about myself and sex 24 hours a day." He told me. "Tonight is about taking care of you."

I wondered how this was possible. He was so mad at me before. He had chained me up and now He was caring for me. How could I betray him and be forgiven so soon after? How long had it been anyway? We ended up on our bed, scurrying under the covers. I was still cold.

Eric wrapped me tight in his arms. I laid my head on his chest. There was no heartbeat. But I knew there was something in there. Eric absolutely did have a heart; I was seeing it tonight. There was a kindness in him, few saw. It was weird to cuddle with a cool body that didn't breathe. I was getting used to it. I still warmed up from his hands creating friction as they rubbed my back and arms.

"Are you ready to speak to me, lover?"

"Yea….I'm sorry. I kinda…lost control back there." I was going to be embarrassed for life. I thought about my crying and… Oh god, If anyone would have ever told me that I would sit down and pee in front of Eric Northman, I'd have thought they were out of their minds!

"Hush," Eric said with enough force for me to remember who was in charge, "You have been through a lot and were just punished for the first time. It was not unexpected by any means."

"Really? You knew this would happen?" I asked, anxiously wanting his reassurance.

"If not tonight, then soon. Maybe nothing too monumental would happen and you would finally succumb to your stresses. I knew there would be some tears after a punishment."

"Does it gross you out? The tears…the snot? And I, kinda, ya know…peed with you in the room." My voice got low.

"Dina," He stroked my face and looked at me. "You are human and I am Vampire. You can't deny your body and urges, any more than I can mine. And there is never to be a secret between us. You shouldn't even hide your body's release from me."

I was quiet. Eric's prejudices were no secret to me, but now he spoke as though he had none. I thought he was struggling with this. Perhaps I the Lionel to his Archie Bunker; He didn't hold my humanity against me. I had seen on one of the blogs he told me to skim through that the sub's Dom made her keep the bathroom door open and even made her go while he stood by her. I think it was even worse when your Master didn't pee himself.

"You'll learn to not yearn for privacy from me soon, I promise. This will take time. Now let's discuss your punishment. How do you feel? Are you angry with me?"

How could I be angry? He didn't do anything. "No, I shouldn't have done that…I-I can't promise that I'm ever going to be okay with you killing people. Its just not who I am or what I believe. I don't know…I don't know how to be honest when I know what that honesty will lead to."

I hoped he didn't get mad. I never wanted to be punished like that again. I also didn't want to be a liar; especially to the man I loved and was living with. But I knew what this honesty would cost – someone's life. Eric also showed me what my deceit cost – and it was not pleasant by any means.

He was quiet. I could tell he was thinking.

"The world will always have killing. Even humans kill – sometimes far more and far worse than Vampires. I can't remember the last time we were responsible for genocide." He paused, as though to let this sink in. "I am a killer. I am ruthless. I am the Sheriff of Area 5 and I'm older than you can ever understand. I'm also your Bonded and your Master, by your own choice. And you will accept me; all of me. I do not mistreat you. My kindness, caring, and affection are always reserved for you. You are forbidden to lie to me. You now know one thing that may happen to you if you do so. I would have killed him anyway. There was no changing his fate. There is no need for guilt."

"And next time? What if you don't know and it is only my words that lead someone to die?" I felt sick at the thought.

"I wish you would accept how the world – mine in particular – works. I can't force this on you. I can only require your honesty and swear to not kill those who don't deserve it."

"I can't make you believe no one deserves to die." I said almost defiantly. This was a moment where Eric and I were painfully different.

"We will tackle this issue one event at a time. I will shield you from this reality as much as I can…anything else, you'd like to share?"

"No, but do you mind if I ask you a question?" I was reluctant to bring it up because I halfway thought that it might make him angry again. But I had to know.

"Of course I don't mind." He said gently. "You can ask me anything you want." I hoped he still meant that after I asked.

"How…" My throat closed up and I had to start again. "How long was I…" I didn't really know how to describe it.

He knew exactly what I was talking about. "From the time I left the room until I carried you out of there, it was 2 hours and 36 minutes."

I stared at him, disbelieving. "No, Eric! It had to have been much longer than that! I just know it was! You're teasing me!"

"Wait here for me a minute," Eric said, getting out of bed.

"Where are you going?" I started to get out of bed to follow him, afraid to be away from him for even a moment or two.

He came around to my side of the bed, lifted my legs back onto the mattress, took 3 of the decorative pillows, and piled them behind me. He pushed me back onto the pillows and tucked the covers up under my arms. I tried a few times to open my mouth and argue, but he gave me a stern look each time. Finally he handed me one of the pillows he slept on, and the green track jacket he had come home in. "Now, do as I say!" he growled softly at me.

I hugged the items tightly and buried my face in Eric's jacket. "Just hurry," I pleaded, the sound of my voice muffled.

He wasn't gone long and slid easily back under the covers when he returned. I wasted no time in scrambling across the bed toward him. He met me halfway; sometimes he was so understanding.

"Now, I want you to think about a few things" he said firmly. I nodded. "Do you remember what you were doing before I got up?"

I tried to think for a few minutes.…

Yes! The evening news had been on. Eric preferred the Vampire-run networks (three had popped up since the Great Revelation), and the newscaster was named Magnus. He was kind of a jerk. He never smiled and he was known to be politically active, always ranting about "the blood being sacred." I had no idea what he was talking about so I mostly tuned him out.

"Yes Eric, Magnus was ranting on the news again! I turned it off, and there you were."

Eric rolled his eyes, which was actually pretty funny coming from Eric. He never did that in front of anybody but me, and I smiled at him. He grinned back.

"The news is over at, roughly, 6:30?" He asked. I nodded. "Then I got up and we argued, and I got everything out, and put you in there for your time-out, and…"

"Time-Out?" I usually didn't interrupt Eric but his words upset me. "You call what you did to me a 'time-out'?" I looked at him with my mouth hanging open, unable to believe what I had just heard.

"Well, how else would you define it?" He asked, totally oblivious to the insult he had just dealt me.

"Eric, you locked me in a cold, dark room!" I exclaimed. "I couldn't hear or see! I couldn't yell for help! I couldn't move! I had to endure that for several hours! That's a 'time-out' to you?"

"You were never in any danger." he told me firmly, in his 'you'd-better-listen' voice. "I was within less that a second's time of getting to you if something went wrong. I never left the house; I only made it seem like I was going to. This is where you need to trust me implicitly, Dina."

"I do!"

"No, you don't. Because if you did, you would know these things. That if I left the house I would make provisions for you to be safe otherwise. You would not work yourself up to a panic attack. You would not be waiting for something bad to happen to you because you would know I would never allow that as long as I was in control of the situation. Do you believe that I was in control of the situation?"

I was stunned, hearing how Eric thought about this. I would have to do my own thinking on the subject. "What if someone stronger than you came in and took over?"

He laughed at that. "Do you really believe that would happen?"

There it was, the ball back in my court again. Why couldn't I earn a point or two here? "I don't think there's anybody stronger than you Eric."

"Do you realize that you just contradicted yourself?" he wanted to know. But then he smiled softly at me. "Dina, I am not the strongest creature on this earth, although there are few who are stronger than me. Not many Vampires make it past a few hundred years before they meet the sun, make an enemy who ends them, or do something else to end their existence. Vampires are not the only supernatural creatures, but we are one of the most powerful. Dina, you may rest assured knowing that you are guarded and kept safe by one of the hundred or so most powerful beings on this planet. I am not idealizing myself; I am stating fact. But I do not have quarrels with any of the others with whom I am acquainted. You are safe with me. Which brings us back to our original question. Trust."

"Can I be honest with you?"

"I hope you will."

"Sometimes it isn't my trust in you that's in question. In some ways I am afraid of you." I looked at my hands in my lap, hoping not to anger him.

He put his arms around me. "A little bit of healthy fear is good. I do have a sadistic side that you will very likely be on the receiving end of many times. You should fear punishment from me because I will never make it something you would enjoy. But, even within the context of those two things, I want you to trust me. I make you this vow, and maybe I should have before now. Even if I am angry with you or you are in the middle of a punishment from me, or if the activity we are pursuing causes you physical pain, I will never let anyone hurt you, and I will not bring serious or permanent injury to you. You need never fear that. You will always be safe."

I looked at him, unable to form the words that I knew he wanted to hear. "So basically you are promising me that you won't let another person or being hurt me, but that at some point you will hurt me yourself, deliberately. When you hurt me, it will be pain and not injury, is that right?

"That is part of it, yes."

"You want me to be afraid of punishment because I can look forward to more of what happened tonight?"

"I can't fully answer that question because neither of us knows if or why you may be punished in the future. The why determines the how."

"That's fair, Eric. And I do trust you. You feel the kind of trust you want from me sometimes because it is there. But there's a lot that's really hard for me to wrap my head around."

"It's all right, Dina. Surprisingly, this does not anger me. It disappoints me. But you and I have not been together long enough for me to have to defend you except in very small ways. I know that having your complete and unending trust will take time."

"So, where does that leave us?"

"Hopefully, working through things and generally happy with each other. I want you to think about the issue of your trust for me and journal about it when you do. Will you do that for me?"

"Yes, I'll do that for you," I told him and smiled.

"Now that we have that out of the way, take a look at this." He showed me his cell phone and it wasn't even 11:00 yet!

"How is that possible!" I shrieked, unable to control myself, sitting forward, and staring at him.

"I told you, Dear One, you were only there for a little less than 2 ¾ hours."

I sat there and added up the time that I was conscious of, when I had access to a clock or some other way to tell the time. It had taken him some time to put all of those restraints on and take them back off of me. I had grossly overestimated my time; that was obvious. "It seemed like so much longer!"

"That's normal," he told me. "When the mind has no point of reference, it perceives time going much slower than it is."

"It's crazy, isn't it?" I said, shaking my head. Not even three hours! I really thought it would be dawn and Eric would have to rush to bed. But we had all night.

"I'm sorry for disbelieving you about the time, Eric. And I do trust you. You're right. …We have to be together a little bit longer for me to know you as well as I want to, so my trust comes naturally. I know we'll get there."

"Good, sit up." Eric leaned forward and kissed the side of my head, then he began to rise and I followed. I wondered what we were going to do next. "Lean forward." I complied, still unsure. He began to pack the pillows behind me and I leaned back.

"Comfortable?"

"Yes." I replied honestly. Not only was this 1,000 times better than being chained to a pole, it felt nice to wear these PJs in our cozy bed.

"Good. Sit tight. I'll be right back."

I wondered where he was going. Even though I wasn't in trouble, I was nervous. It was an irrational reaction. He disappeared into the bathroom and came back quickly. I saw the flower in his hand and my stomach dropped. Eric wasn't happy about this. The ever-present bond told me. He never put me down and didn't like me to do it either. I hoped I wasn't going to be punished…although he hadn't actually ordered me not to do or say thing to put myself down. I wondered if I could argue for myself and win. He always gave me a chance to speak before he punished me.

He sat beside me. "Why did I find this in the garbage, Lover?"

"I…I felt bad about lying to you." I sounded so pathetic now. When I was in the moment I'd tossed it without a second thought.

"I punish you Dina, you don't punish yourself. You associate success and not failing with your worth. This is not true. You will fail. You are not perfect. I will push you and when you stumble, I will correct you. Then you will do better."

I dropped my head, embarrassed. Why was this so hard for me? Was my natural competitiveness and perfectionism harming me or the way Eric saw me? He lifted my chin and looked into my eyes.

"You always take on too much. From fighting a group of humans to save a baby vampire to assuming you could handle Bobby with no one there to aid you. Your only job now if to please me and I've already guaranteed there will be times when you will fail. I'm not angry. I am neither surprised nor disappointed. What can we do to fix this mindset of yours?"

"Are you going to punish me?" I asked, honestly wondering. If punishment corrected behavior, would he 'correct' my mindset?

"This time or ever?" He answered my question with a question.

"Either...both."

"I might set a rule against you making comments that disparage yourself. I'm familiar with your "jokes" that put yourself down." He must have seen my look my surprise. "Dina, when will you learn I know almost everything?" He shook his head at me and I was evermore curious how Eric managed to get things done and know so much all the time.

"As I was saying," he continued. "I don't know if punishment will change the overall thought process behind the actions. You won't be punished anymore tonight. But perhaps one day it will work well to start stomping out this behavior through punishment. From a psychological angle, could you see this working?"

I stared at him open mouthed before I regained my wits.

"You want me to give you scientific research and academic theories so you can punish me? You want me to validate you punishing me?" I asked incredulously.

"Yes." He smirked the cockiest smile I'd ever seen. "Remember no lying."

"Ugh…There is a chance changing how you talk about things changes how you think and that repeating things makes them believable. It's debatable."

"I see…then perhaps you are no longer allowed to insult yourself. We can test out this 'debatable' theory. If you insult yourself, I will punish you. And we will find other ways to get you over this belief that if you don't be things perfectly you are unworthy."

"Insult verbally?"

"Are you trying to find loop holes to insult yourself?" He cocked an eye brow, making me feel silly the way he phrased it.

"Loop holes to avoid punishment." I volleyed back.

His eyes narrowed and I fought with myself: my typical pattern before Eric was to stare back, harder. But now I wondered if the more intelligent and submissive thing to do would be to lower my eyes and not be so defensive. I blinked and stopping staring back, but kept my head level.

"Fine. You'll only be punished for verbal remarks against yourself. For now."

I nodded. "Now, My Bonded, lets get this back where it belongs."

It was easy to forget he was holding the flower on his lap. He pulled out a hair clip from his pocket. I leaned forward so we could put the flower back. I didn't miss Eric's words for a second. I was His and he wanted me.

I watched him stare at the clip and roll it in his hands. I didn't think Eric had ever used a snap clip before. "Do you want help?"

"I'm sure I can work a hair clip. Hold still."

I didn't point out that I hadn't moved. He was kinda cute when he was irked. He finally snapped it open and was surprised. Then he seemed quite pleased with himself. He snapped it shut and reopened to test it. I suddenly wondered if he was going to hurt my head snapping it shut. I'd have friends do that while fixing my hair and even did it once or twice to myself.

"Don't be worried. I won't break your clip. I can buy you more anyway." He informed me.

I smiled. The bond wasn't that bad. Not always. Weird though, very weird.

He pushed the stem into my hair and got it in just the right place. He held it and moved the open clip into place. He carefully snapped it into place.

"There. Beautiful." He took a moment to admire his handiwork.

It felt like things had shifted – again. It was amazing the day I wore the collar with his name on it and all the symbolism of that day: addressing him as my master, fastening his collar around my neck thereby reaffirming being his, and being styled according to his preferences. But now I had been punished. I was also soaking in the care he gave me after a punishment.

"Come now, Lover, you know I shouldn't have to ask what you are thinking."

"Is it different now? I know my worth hasn't changed or my position with you, but is it different at all?"

"In some ways. I've been careful and lenient – far more than I assumed I would – but now it might be time to really start training and correcting you. The faster you learn and become trained, the faster we can settle into a regular routine. And you can gain some privileges. You know I don't do this to be cruel. I wouldn't be surprised if you received small punishments daily until you are more well trained and larger punishments, like tonight, more than one a week."

"Daily?" I squeaked. And once a week? More than one a week?

"It's not all bad. You are not embracing the best parts of our relationship. The most obvious being, after a punishment there is no anger. You did wrong. I corrected you. I will never carry anger after you have been properly disciplined. We are back to being 100% fine with one another."

I took a moment to think this over. After fights in other relationships, even after 'I'm sorries' and 'you are forgivens', there was still anger. There was still resentment. It was residual and minor, but it was almost always there. Right now in this moment, Eric wasn't mad. We wouldn't talk about it in an hour. He wouldn't bring it up at a later date – that one last dig over something that upset him. It was over.

But I still had a lingering issue or two. I should jump on it while I had Eric sitting beside me asking me if I wanted to talk. I was also quite comfy.

"So if I do something and I'm really sorry, do I still get punished?"

"Yes."

"Why?" I asked, my voice going up just a tad too high.

"Because the behavior needs to be stopped. Punishment is preventative. It ensures next time you won't do the same thing. It also allows for smaller punishments or less punishment altogether." He explained calmly.

"I don't follow."

"If you do something during training, the punishment can be smaller because you are expected to make mistakes. After training, that expectation is smaller. And in public, misbehavior isn't tolerated. We've talked about this before – if you do things in front of other vampires, I must respond as is expected of me. You know my reputation. They will expect me to be ruthless and unmerciful. Thus the punishments can be smaller now. Understand?"

"Yes."

"You can also have fewer punishments because the quicker I stomp this behavior out, the faster you behave better and only get rewards. If I let you get away with things and then punish you, you will not learn good boundaries. Does that make sense?"

"Yes, but I'm not in love with the concept.

He laughed. "Nor do I expect you to be. No matter how turned on you get from pain – and you do – I will ensure you don't want to be punished. I also won't stop once a punishment begins; no matter what. As we discussed tonight, if I need to change your punishment due to your panic or health, it will be changed not discontinued."

"Why? What if you know I'm really sorry and won't do it again? What if I only need half of what you planned?" I inquired.

"Because you can't opt out of the parts of our relationship you dislike. It's not a game you can quit when you don't get your way."

"I'm not a child Eric and I understand I can't just have it my way. I'm just asking." I replied feeling very embarrassed and insulted by his analogy.

"I wasn't trying to insult you. I won't do that. I think we've talked about this enough and there are a few more things I want to get to." He paused as if to ensure I was okay with this, I nodded.

"I would like to update you about what's going on outside this house – please don't interrupt –I'm telling you what is already done and not what you can change."

I nodded fearfully and let him continue.

"As far as facebook is concerned you have shut off your phone for an impromptu vacation. You are starting a new job soon and enjoying the advance from it. Where you went there is little reception or wifi. A few people are concerned and have tried to call you. Most are happy for you. I've been keeping up to date with all of your stuff. We will be discussing whom you will keep speaking to and when within the next day or two. We will also finalize what things from your old life you will keep – I've already gone through almost all of it. Finally I have some news for you."

"Wow…okay, that's a lot to absorb. I'm not entirely happy, but what you said isn't as bad as I thought it would be."

"Good. As for news: firstly, you get to call your family this week. Only 30 minutes of phone time. I will sit with you and hope you use it wisely. Do not be nervous, we have a story about where you are and what you've been up to. We'll move forward slowly. I've also decided we are moving."

My jaw dropped. Okay I was still reeling from him posting about my life, going through my stuff, and wanting to cut people out of my life. But then I finally get to call my family. And we're moving! Was he trying to kill me with all this?

"Relax. We're only going to another home of mine. I've been remodeling it for us."

"But why?"

"Dina, I never live in one place. That's both dangerous and boring. This house is nice. It's also small. It wasn't made for both of us. You have had problems here with things like lighting and I guarantee the other rooms are in the same or worse shape. I tend to stay here only to rest and gain solitude. The smallness helps with that. This other house is larger and will be altered so you are comfortable there too."

"That's…really sweet. Are you sure you want this? It's not just about me." I wanted to make sure.

"No, I never planned for us to be here indefinitely. We will go between our homes. Keep enough at each place. If we like one more, we spend more time there. I'm texting with the construction crew regularly and Pam has gone to visit and check the progress. I'll take you for a preview soon and talk about any changes we need; remember I'm not always aware of every human need you have."

"That would be wonderful…so what else are we doing tonight?"

"Just lying in bed. How does that sound?"

"Couldn't be better." I smiled.

Eric crawled back into bed with me. He pulled me close and I enjoyed smelling his delicious scent. He held me tight. Every now and again, he'd snuggle me, nuzzle against my head, or kiss me gently. I waited for him to initiate sex. But he didn't. What was going on here? Did he even get his blowjob today?

I kissed his neck. Once. Twice. I sucked a bit on his skin.

"Dina?"

I stopped surprised. Did I do something wrong by initiating? He sounded surprised.

"We don't have to little one. Tonight is about you." He said and kissed my head chastely.

"I want you." He looked into my eyes. "I want you to make love to me."

I was almost as surprised by my words as his. When did I actually 'make love'? I usually never said anything so corny. I didn't assume Eric would go for that idea either.

"Anything you want." He leaned down and kissed my lips. He wasn't his typical forceful self. His hands stroked and ran across my body in a slow motion. His touch was delicate. We laid there kissing and feeling one another's bodies for some time. We never went to touch our more intimate parts. I finally broke away and sat up.

I stripped out of my shirt and pants in record time. I didn't try to be sexy, just quick. I wanted to press my skin against his. Eric followed my lead and got naked even faster. We fell back into our spots. The kissing and stroking resumed but it was harder to ignore his erection. It pressed into me and I felt his wet precum against my leg. I knew I was equally as wet. I threw one leg over his and pressed into him. I hoped he felt how much I wanted him.

"Eric." I breathed between kisses.

He rolled me on top of him and we helped move his cock inside of me. I rocked against him. I couldn't remember the last time Eric let me be on top. He was really going out of his way for me tonight. His hands kept rubbing my back and bottom. Up and down, in a sweet rhythm. I loved the way my name sounded on his lips as he was inside of me.

As wonderful as it felt, it was lacking. I needed him. I needed him over me, on me, in me, around me,…I wanted to be surrounded and sucked into him. I wanted him to be a part of me. I needed that reassurance.

"Dina?' He asked, obviously feeling these emotions swirling in me.

"I need you…I want you on top; holding me; inside of me."

He looked slightly confused, and then he nodded. He flipped us over, without fully dislodging from me. He quickly thrust his full length in me and wrapped his arms tightly around my body. I sighed in pleasure. My legs wrapped around his and his knees bent to give him more of ability to thrust into me. He wasn't rough, but his drew his cock out and made sure every millimeter was buried in me when his hips swung toward mine.

His lips spilt kisses all over my face. I hungrily caught his lips every time they came near mine. He nipped at my neck, but didn't bite. When he came closer to his first orgasm and my third, he finally sunk his fangs into me. Sometimes he needed just a mouthful or two to cum hard and enjoy his climax. I felt him harden inside of me and begin again.

My body was tiring, but I didn't want to stop. Even when I got a little sore, I didn't want to stop.

"Lover, you need my blood. And probably some nourishment." Eric moved to pull out of me and I clamped my legs around him. Of course, this wouldn't work. He could get out of my hold with ease.

"I want you inside me when I take your blood."

He looked like he would deny me. Tell me my body needed to rest and recuperate, but he nodded his head. He pulled out, which disappointed me, but moved to sit beside me. He began to pull me up and I knelt in front of him, assuming I was going to get on top of him again. Instead he pushed my knees wide and licked his fingers. He lubricated my pussy and then smeared more saliva on his cock. "Turn around." He said.

I obeyed and he pulled me back so I sat on his cock, in a reverse cowgirl style. He wrapped an arm tightly around me. He raised his other arm and bit his wrist. I latched onto the wound. He growled as I did so. He rocked his hips against me. I began to suck his blood and ride him. He came very fast and told me to release his arm. I did so with regret. He tasted…good. Different and indescribable; like nothing I'd had before.

"Come, Lover. We're going to get you food and share blood one more time."

We disentangled ourselves and I acknowledged how hungry I was. I assumed we'd walk to the kitchen, but Eric lifted me before I could protest. He carried me bridal style and sat me on the counter top. He asked what I wanted and I had to think about. I opted for leftover, since we could just toss them in the microwave. Eric followed my culinary directions. He handed me the now-warm bowl with the lid still on it. He then put a fork on the lid and I moved my fingers to keep it there.

"Hold that."

I looked at him strangely. What was his next move? Before I could think to vocalize this, he lifted me up and carried me (and my food) to the living room. He gently sat me on the couch and took the food. He put the bowl on the table and covered me with the blanket. He then sat beside me and brushed my bangs from my face. He looked me over to ensure I was comfy – and I was. He then took the lid off of my food and grabbed the utensil. He brought the bowl to his lap and experimentally grabbed a bite of food with the fork. He brought it to my mouth and I accepted it.

After this repeated a few times, it began to feel weird. I was a grown woman and he was feeding me. Eric must have noticed me not taking what he offered with enthusiasm or speed.

"Dina, I'm caring for you. Tonight I've punished you, shown you fair discipline, taught you a lesson, talked with you, made love to you, and now I'm providing you with sustenance. As your master, this is my duty and privilege. And it's your duty and honor to accept it."

"I feel a little childish." I was getting good at this honest communication thing. Or I was too tired to shut up. Either way.

"Nonsense. We don't have such things between us. There are no labels for the things we do and no embarrassment between us. Now open."

I took the bite he offered. I eventually sat back and just let him feed me. He rose once to get me a drink. He put a straw in the glass and held it while I sipped. There was actually something sweet and nice about this. Once all of the food was gone, Eric told me to see to my human needs and meet him back in bed.

I went and peed. I couldn't help blushing remembering having done this right in front of him not long ago. I still had a long way to go if Eric wanted me to never be embarrassed with him. I hated being punished, but found I loved the after care.

When I came out Eric was on the bed with a knife in his hand. I recognized it from when we had shared blood before. I looked his cock and saw it was glistening. He must have applied some lube while I was in the washroom.

"I want us to mutually exchange. I'm going to be inside of you, as you have requested and when the time is right, I'll cut my neck. You will grab the wound before it heals. I'll bite you then. Understand?"

"Yes, Eric." I paused. That came out of my mouth naturally despite not being commanded to respond like that tonight. Eric only smiled and beckoned me over. He wasted no time pulling me on the bed and falling on me. His cock was slick and plunged into me. I groaned. He thrust hard and fast. He seemed to know I wanted this now. I wanted his ownership as well as his tenderness.

It was easy for me to cum. I was so sensitive and the more orgasms I had, the faster they came on. Eric slowed to reach for the blade. I was ready and craving sweet nectar. It was always hard to watch him injure himself, even though I knew he'd heal. Hell, he might heal before I could get to his blood.

I grabbed quickly as he bore down. Only a splash hit my throat, when he bit into my throat. I nearly came. We began to build a deep rhythm…thrust, grind, suck…rock, clench, lick…thrust, clench, suck,… grind, lick, thrust…

I felt my orgasm build and the intensity was almost too much. I tried to stop taking his blood, but he pressed into my mouth and pushed my head down with his own. His hips never stopped moving.

I swear I saw stars. Everything stopped for a second. I came so hard, my legs shook and then I couldn't move. Eric came inside of me and his roar sounded like it was a mile away. I laid there panting. He healed my neck and his own closed. He rolled beside me and let me pull myself together.

"Wow…" There were no words.

Eric laughed. "I still want you, lover. Tell me if you feel up to it."

I thought about his words and knew the answer. I would be ready and I would sleep for a very long time once dawn came.

EPOV

The bond quieted as she fell asleep, and I could finally relinquish my tight control on my own actions and emotions. Vampires are rarely restless but this night I was. I left the bed and paced nervously. I would have liked to go out for a fly but it was too close to dawn, and she might wake up to find me gone. She was especially fragile – more so than I'd thought she would be after a punishment, even one as harsh as what I had put her through.

The clinginess I had expected, and welcomed. It meant that even though I was the source of the hurt she had suffered, she did not hold me responsible for it. She held herself responsible, and therefore the punishment had done its job. The crying, I regretted, and hoped that I had soothed her feelings. Caring for her had not been a chore. On the contrary, it had been a joy to see her begin to smile again as I cared for her. And she had let go and performed one of the most basic acts a human does in front of me without thinking. She was embarrassed but now that it had happened I would force her to do it again. Her boundaries were steadily breaking down and I would conquer all of them. I would allow her to hide nothing from me!

But she had no idea what she was asking me to do by exchanging with her while buried deep inside her like that! I had almost told her "no." Taking her blood while being joined like that was too close to another act; one that I looked forward to with great anticipation. Was it only my advanced age that had allowed me to keep control, or was it something else?

I had come to care deeply for her. Was I in fact capable of love? Could the things I felt from her, one day come from me? Before her, I had thought not, but now, I was beginning to think otherwise.

How would she react when she found out my ultimate intentions? I could have easily kept going and had the deed done, but at what cost? On the other hand, I had enjoyed it immensely – bringing us both to the edge like that. The strength of both our sexual responses to it, especially hers, made me crave the act again.

Putting my blood inside her with my cock penetrating her as deep as it could go was quite the act of dominance, and she had asked it of me! My fangs ached and my cock twitched to do it again. It was good that the dawn forced me to lie down quietly next to her, take her in my arms, and go to rest. Otherwise, I am not sure what I might have done.