Taiyang had always accepted that he wasn't Ruby's hero.
Not even when she was a baby, just starting to crawl and talk, did Ruby consider her dad her idol. That title always belonged to someone else and Taiyang didn't pretend that his baby girl wasn't justified in latching onto someone like her mother. It was just natural that Summer would be the centre of adoration.
It'd be hypocritical of him to get bitter about it and he never was. Summer had been there for him. She had been the one to take a man at his lowest and show him that he could still build a family, that Yang could still have a happy childhood, and that he could have another love.
What a nice person she was. Too bad she had to spend her last years being your babysitter.
Taiyang didn't just hear that. He was having fun simply sitting down, drinking some coffee, and watching Ruby train, years having passed since his little girl was trying out every weapon under the sun. Just trying to find that right combination that'd make her the best Huntress she could be.
The sun was shining, without a single cloud in the sky, and Taiyang was taking a break from grading all kinds of papers that sometimes made him smile with hope, fear for the future, or even both as he laughed at some of the stuff that some Signal students thought qualified for an answer. Just another happy day in his life with his family and no issues whatsoever.
He didn't need the anti-depressants anymore.
Six months off the pills isn't going to make them forget about a seven year-old having to step-up as a parent because you're weak.
Taiyang had these thoughts sometimes. They had came after Raven left during those weeks of hell where it was just him, a hole where his girlfriend should have been, and a baby that had no idea where her mother was and didn't like that one bit. Her father basically running ragged and going through a mental breakdown didn't help.
Summer had been there. She saw everything and came in to help with Yang and just about everything.
Taiyang used to have nightmares about her being gone. No one to fill the void that Raven left and Taiyang just getting himself stuck in more trouble as he let Yang down and the dark thoughts getting louder and louder. He could feel the mug in his hand starting to crack under the force of his grip.
"Uncle Qrow, look! I can do it." Ruby said as she readied her stance and pulled off one of her many feats with Crescent Rose again. Taiyang doubted that even Qrow was that good at the age of fourteen.
"Good job, kid," Qrow said as he ruffled her hair. "Hate to be a Grimm in your way. Or a combat practice opponent."
Sometimes Taiyang wondered if Qrow knew what buttons he was pushing. If he remembered that he and Taiyang had just yesterday been arguing about whether Ruby should be moved up a year in Signal, or at least allowed to have combat lessons with the older kids, in staff meetings.
The drunk probably can't even remember the name of the last woman he slept with. Let alone a meeting. Taiyang felt ashamed of the thought even crossed his mind. What Qrow did in his spare time, so long as it never hurt anybody innocent, was his own business. It wasn't his place to sit and judge just because they argued about it.
The Headmaster of Signal only sided with Taiyang because of two reasons. The first was that he was Ruby's father and thus had a veto, according to Signal rules, and the second was that it'd have been unprecedented. Signal was a combat school, but it was a combat school mostly designed to give kids the basic fighting skills needed if they wanted them instead of preparing warriors. That was Beacon's job.
Ruby had her friends all in the same year and that had been the result of years of subtle pushing by Taiyang towards play-dates and group projects. Putting her a whole year higher would have distorted her whole social life and she'd probably get worried about standing-out. It was for her own good.
Not that Qrow saw it that way. Taiyang's old teammate was a Signal teacher that was barely at Signal this year. Few of the teachers were still active Hunters and none other than Qrow had his kind of schedule. It had only been because of Ozpin that Qrow had been given that kind of accommodation for a full-time teacher, even then only because Qrow taught combat.
He didn't see Ruby as a child. He saw Ruby as a Huntress and anything keeping her from advancing into Beacon was either stupid or naive. Taiyang could see it in his eyes, not needing words to read the man, and still stood his ground.
Like Ruby would thank you for that. You know she'd want to move up a year if Qrow suggested it. Her hero.
It was natural that a girl like Ruby would see Qrow as a hero instead of Taiyang.
Where was Taiyang when Summer died and his girls needed someone to lean on? He was crying in his room and going out in hours-long walks while leaving Yang and Ruby alone at home. Who was the one that saved them from the Grimm when they were near-death? Qrow. Who took years to rebuild himself while Yang was having to be twice the parent he ever was? Him.
In the stories about dragons and princesses, everyone praised the knight. No one even gave a thought about the king who couldn't defend his own daughters.
But that was fine. Taiyang was happy that it was at least someone like Qrow who was Ruby's hero. The kind of guy who was with the good guys to the end and actually fought the monsters and braved the hard missions for so long. Not some loser who'd break down again at the first sight of a corpse or things going wrong. Taiyang retired for a reason.
He was fine with just being a family man. He was in a job he loved, two daughters who were going to do great things, and had just about anything that most people would be dreaming of having around his age. No money troubles, a nice place to live, and no great crisis hanging over his head.
Even if there were problems, it'd be fine as long as he had his girls.
You sure about that? Sure that it's not 'girl'?
Yes. Yes he was sure. He was fucking sure that it was girls, and not girl. Never just girl.
Those were the worst thoughts. They could turn the nicest day of the year into clouds and misery within a second itself. They poisoned everything good about Taiyang's life and made it seem the work of some sick joke that never ended and only ever got worse. As if everything that Taiyang had built again and again were just lies to keep him from throwing himself off the nearest cliff.
No. They weren't true. Summer was kind and caring, but not the kind of person who would lie to Taiyang's face about something so important.
So what if Ruby looked nothing like him? Yang inherited his hair colour and fighting style but had her mother's temper, hair-style, and sometimes looked so much like Raven that it became hard for Taiyang to even look at her. Did that mean that Raven went off and had someone else's kid and just lied to him, then leaving when she thought that he figured it-
Shut up.
Taiyang knew for sure that Yang was his. Raven was there to name her, if nothing else, and she was never the sort of person who'd go behind his back on something like that. It made her hated by many of his friends, who insisted he could do better when they thought he couldn't hear, but Raven was never the kind of person to not throw harsh truths into someone's face.
The way she left was a good example of that.
Summer was the same. She was gentler about it, but she knew when to stand her ground and speak from the heart. Taiyang mentally smashed apart thoughts of Summer telling Qrow that she had to be there for Taiyang. The two of them crying as they decided that he was pitiful enough for them to end what relationship they secretly had.
The thought of Summer giving in to temptation and having a night with Qrow just two years after dating and marrying Taiyang.
Taiyang knew he was going to have to use the anti-depressants again. His therapist said that there was no shame in having to use them on and off again but it didn't stop the sense of shame. The sense that he was never going to escape the pits he kept finding himself in for nearly two decades.
"Dad! Dad!" Ruby cried out. She was jumping up and down and waving Crescent Rose in the air as she tried to grab his attention. "Did you see what I just did?"
"Sorry, Rubes. Your old man's got his head in the clouds. Mind showing it again?" Taiyang asked as he kept an eye on the unsteady scythe and Qrow not doing or saying anything. "Be careful with Crescent Rose. You never know what might happen."
"Tai's right. Don't want you ending up in the ER because your hands got sweaty." Qrow said as he smiled to Taiyang who returned it.
"Got it." Ruby said as she started her technique again.
Taiyang pushed all his thoughts and worries to the side and focused on Ruby. He gave a few shouts of encouragement but it was clear that Ruby was putting all of her focus, as she should, on Crescent Rose and making sure there wasn't a single mistake.
They're going to make her fight their wars. Just like they did with Summer.
"Just shut up and have faith." Taiyang said to himself as Ruby flawlessly performed the kind of move that only a Beacon student was expected to get just right. "Have faith in Summer, Qrow, Ruby, Yang, Ozpin, everyone. Just believe in them."
It wasn't like he could do anything else, he mused to himself, as he got up and ran over to Ruby to congratulate her. Why should Qrow be the only one who got to put a hand on Ruby's shoulder and say good job?
Taiyang might not be Ruby's hero like Qrow was, but he was still her father.
He was sure of it.
He is. I'm just being mean to him for some reason.