Disclaimer: Sadly I am yet to write a class, so I own nothing... Chapter 21
"Lizzie..." Alison slowly pushed Elizabeth's bedroom door open, letting a line of light into the otherwise pitch black space. "Time to get up, sweetheart."
Having to get up in the morning is one of the worst feelings in the world. It's a little better during daylight saving time, when sunlight floods your bedroom at an ungodly hour and you're fooled into waking-up much earlier than normal; yet in a much better mood than you would be if it was bleak, dark and raining outside. As that thought settled in, an excitable weight deposited itself on Elizabeth's bed, and began to rock back and forth, vibrating the bed and disturbing her slumber.
"Mumma, bakey bakey," William gurgled, forcefully slapping at the bedcovers where his mother was currently pretending to sleep. Although he was an unrelenting alarm clock, she relished their time together, and regretted that it was becoming scarcer due to the increasing number of projects J&E Events were organising.
Savouring the last few minutes of peace before facing a hectic day, Elizabeth lay very still under the covers, shielding her face just in case one of William's stray hits got a little more accurate.
Getting significantly more annoyed that his mum hadn't started paying attention to him, William started yanking at the covers and tried to sneak his head in, "Nami, mumma asweep." The little boy proclaimed, futilely trying to yank the resistant covers out of his mother's firm grasp.
Alison Gardiner giggled watching the energetic 16 month old jump up and down on the mistress's bed, enjoying the extra time he had with his mother.
"Well if she's asleep, you shouldn't be trying to wake her," Alison said, earning her a scowl from the toddler.
A regular at the Bennett household, Alison had already washed up the remains of the hot chocolate Elizabeth had sloppily made herself last night; and she had waked William up, a terrible task in itself. William, for all his protests about going to bed, loved to sleep and hated being waked up – unless of course it was by Elizabeth.
Alison had been watching over this little family for a long time now and had noticed the subtle changes in Elizabeth over the past few weeks. William was the light behind her eyes; he completed her in a way that only mothers can truly appreciate, and yet recently that spark had gone. Now when Elizabeth looked into her son's face, her eyes clouded over and an inexplicable pained expression crossed her face. It was imperceptible to nearly anyone, save those closest to her; and as a result, a small committee - comprised of Alison, Edward and Jane - had met privately on several occasions in order to decipher Elizabeth's Rubik's Cube life.
The source of the problem was easy to identify, but they did not know the full extent of the situation.
"And what do we have here?" Elizabeth quickly pulled the covers back, and grabbed William, who was now excitedly screaming, back under the covers with her. His squeals of delight were muffled, but his little form wriggled and giggled as he lay in his mother's embrace.
Alison simply smiled, gathered some of Elizabeth's discarded clothes off the floor, and shoved them into the laundry basket on the landing. After parting the curtains and opening the windows, she moved over to Elizabeth's bed and coughed loudly.
Elizabeth threw back the covers, her mass of chocolate brown hair was splayed across her pillow and her cheeks were rosy from playing with William.
"Sorry Ali, good morning. How are you today?" Elizabeth pulled William into a bear hug and let him lie on her chest, kissing his head and moving his soft curls out of his face.
"Good m'dear. What time did you get in last night? I must have been asleep." Alison placed a cup of steaming coffee in Elizabeth's hands and sat down gently on the edge of the bed. She really wanted to ask her why she stayed at the office so late, but she hoped her niece would volunteer the information.
"About 11, I think." Elizabeth avoided Alison's questioning gaze and tried to steer the conversation into safer waters. "I'm not going into work today."
"I gathered as much from the scribbled note you left on the kitchen counter – people can decipher your writing at work?" Alison said with a hint of a smile, holding her arms out to William, who gratefully crawled into her lap.
"Yes," Elizabeth said with a hint of indignation. "Well, at least they can now that I've taken to writing everything on computer," she reluctantly admitted.
The creases of a smile pulled at the corner of Alison's ageing eyes, and lines appeared on either side of her mouth, a sign that she was getting older. It was Alison's smile that everyone loved; it had the power to light up a room, or give you the impression you were in her confidence, even from your first encounter. Like Elizabeth's eyes, it was Alison's smile that showed her soul.
"Ow, William, stop that. No!" Alison chided and unfurled his chubby little fingers from her hair. "Don't do that, it hurts," she continued, placing a little kiss on the tips of his fingers.
In light of her reproof, little tears began to bud in his eyes, and he quickly crawled towards his mother. "Mumma!" He was obviously hoping his mum would be on his side; he was disappointed.
"No, William. Nanny is right; you can't pull at people's hair. What you did was wrong; you hurt her." Elizabeth tried to remain strong as salty hot tears started to run down her son's beautiful creamy white face. She knew it was important to discipline him; the last thing she wanted was for Darcy to comment on her mothering skills again.
There he was again, Fitzwilliam Darcy. In less than ten minutes, he had gone from stalking her dreams to praying on her waking mind; it was an endless struggle.
"Lizzie, are you alright? You look like you're going to cry." Alison took one of Elizabeth's smooth hands in her own, and looked into her eyes. "What aren't you telling me, honey?"
Strange to hear your own words echoed, Elizabeth thought, as she remembered what she'd said to Caitlyn last night. "It's nothing honestly; time has a way of working these things out." Elizabeth slipped out of the bed, away from Alison, and picked up William, pulling him to her hip. "Caitlyn is coming over."
"Caitlyn? Our Caitlyn? Your sister?" Alison trained her face to hide the hurt at Elizabeth's dismissal and focused on the fact that her other niece was coming over. It was hard to believe, considering Caitlyn had never showed an interest in coming over before.
"She wants something," Alison blurted out. She couldn't stand the thought of Elizabeth's being taken advantage of. Her younger sisters were always so manipulative; time hadn't changed them.
"I know," Elizabeth said calmly. "She's coming over here at ten. That should give me some time to go shopping."
"Is that why you aren't going into work?"
"Why else wouldn't I go into work?" Elizabeth echoed from in the bathroom, the shower obscuring her words.
"Fitzwilliam Darcy perhaps?" Alison mumbled.
"WHAT?" Elizabeth shouted, and William thinking this was hilarious, tried to imitate her.
"SQUAT! Squat squat squat," William chimed, listening to the echo his voice made in the bathroom.
"I said – another party perhaps?" Alison amended.
"Oh! No, what party?"
"Never mind; must have gotten it wrong. I thought Jane said something about a party."
"William, please stop squirting mummy's shampoos on the floor," Alison heard Elizabeth utter gently. He was certainly becoming a handful. "Oh that party Jane wants me to go to on Saturday. I don't have an excuse; I have to go. Jane came fully prepared for every excuse when she asked me to go: babysitters booked, dress bought, shoes picked and she's coming over to do my hair. I thought I showed you the dress; it's in my closet."
Alison glanced to the walk-in closet door and smiled. Yes, she'd already seen the dress and knew all about Jane's plan to get Elizabeth there; she was the babysitter, after all.
One way or another, they were going to sort out this mess with Elizabeth and Fitzwilliam.
Elizabeth hadn't been gone ten minutes when the house phone began a persistent ring. Despite the fact that Alison was trying to balance two baskets of freshly laundered clothes, she stumbled to the phone and was really thankful that Elizabeth wasn't home. She hadn't failed to notice the effect a ringing phone had on Elizabeth's disposition in the past few weeks, so it was only natural that she was glad her niece wasn't about; she wouldn't have to watch the look of disappointment on Elizabeth's face.
"Elizabeth Bennett's household," Alison spoke clearly, balancing the phone between her ear and shoulder.
"Hello," a velvety baritone voice said. "Is Elizabeth available?"
"I'm afraid she just left. May I ask who's calling and pass on a message?" At first she thought it was a sales call, but the caller sounded agitated, nervous even.
"No, that's quite alright. I'll call back later. When are you expecting her home?"
"She's in a meeting at ten. She will be in this afternoon. Are you sure I can't take your name, and I'll get her to give you call?"
"No, it's fine. Thank you." Without waiting for a goodbye the phone disconnected, and the caller was gone.
Alison staggered back to the counter, gripping the edge to regain her composure; there was no mistaking who that caller was. Air filled Alison's lungs, but she kept gasping for breath. On autopilot, she fumbled across the keys on the phone and waited for it to ring. After about three rings, the call connected.
"He found her." She uttered breathlessly, then hung up.
Twelve shopping bags, six shops, three tantrums, one awkward encounter, and two hours later, Elizabeth shuffled into her kitchen, letting out a deep sigh, as William rushed past her to Nanny Gardiner.
"That was a nightmare." Elizabeth threw open the cupboards, scrabbling for coffee like an AA member falling off the wagon. Laying her hands on the ground coffee, she smelled its aroma, breathing in the relief and letting its scent calm her.
"SURPRISE!" A voice shouted and in shock Elizabeth nearly inhaled neat coffee, causing her to choke and her eyes to water.
With her heart beating a little faster, Elizabeth let out a deep breath when she spotted her sister Caitlyn's reflection in the window. Unfortunately, she'd forgotten the container of coffee in her hands, and her tense breathing caused the contents to shoot out the container and down her top.
"Mumma muss," out of nowhere William appeared at her feet and pointed to the coffee on the floor; it was always lovely for him to point out her mistakes. Oblivious to the fact that he was highlighting his mother's clumsiness, he immediately squatted, giving the brown grains all his attention. He began to run his fingers through the fragrant mess.
"No! William," Elizabeth nearly shouted, quickly grabbing him off the floor and securing him in her arms.
The touching moment was interrupted by a gentle giggling from the other side of the kitchen, and Elizabeth and William both turned to Caitlyn with wide grins on their faces – Elizabeth's was sheepish and William's was playful.
"Caitlyn, you look...amazing." It pained Elizabeth to admit it, especially considering that she was currently covered in coffee stains, but it was true; two years had done her sister A LOT of good. Caitlyn had never been a wall flower; she had always been ostentatious and loud. But gone were the straining mini-skirts and tank tops that had plagued her teenage years, and in their place was a demure cranberry A-line dress which stopped just above the knee.
Elizabeth wasn't entirely sure whether the transformation was prompted by her current relationship, but she was definitely going to find out.
"Thank you, Elizabeth, but aren't you going to use your good manners and introduce us?" Caitlyn gestured to William, who was now hiding in her hair.
Great, now it'll look like even more of a mess, Elizabeth thought, a fragrant bird's nest. In addition to feeling her appearance was sub-par, Elizabeth blushed at the social set-down by her sister. That was three times in two days; where were her manners?
"Of course - William, this is your aunty, Caitlyn Aurora Bennett; and Caitlyn, meet William Anthony Bennett, my son and your nephew." Elizabeth held out William's grubby little hand, and Caitlyn gingerly accepted it, shaking it briefly before slyly trying to wipe the coffee grains off her dress. This didn't escape Elizabeth's notice.
"He's adorable. Look at those eyes, that hair. He looks just like you." Caitlyn gushed, stroking William's silky curls.
"Thank you. His hair colour actually comes from his father." Still holding William, Elizabeth brewed the coffee and popped the cafetiere on the coffee table in the lounge, beckoning for Caitlyn to take a seat on the couch next to her.
"Well I wouldn't know. You've always been very cloak and dagger about the whole paternity thing." Caitlyn poured fresh cream and three spoonfuls of sugar into her cup and left Elizabeth to pour her own. "We still think it's George, you know."
Elizabeth let out a deep sigh, pulled William's hair out of his eyes, and looked into his face. There was no sign of George, only Fitzwilliam – it was an insult to think otherwise. Despite the tedious allegations, it was second nature to her now; she simply rolled her eyes and prepared her coffee, handing William a biscuit in the process.
"It's not George; if it was, I would never have broken up with him like I did."
"He was heartbroken for a while, you know," Caitlyn brightened up, whilst the scanning the room.
"No, he wasn't. He was after sympathy." The George that Elizabeth remembered was probably heartbroken for ten minutes, and then most likely consoled himself with a good red – redhead that is.
"Aren't you going to ask me how Mum is?"
"Caitlyn," Elizabeth spoke softly and tilted her head to the side. "Your mum and my mum are two very different people."
"Oh, Lizzie, stop being so dramatic; she gave birth to you and raised us." Caitlyn obviously chose to ignore the part Elizabeth had played in her upbringing.
"She gave birth to me; that makes her my mother, not my mum. So much more goes into being a mum than the bit at the beginning."The manner in which Elizabeth spoke brooked no reproach.
"I hope I'll be a good mother." Caitlyn thoughtfully rubbed her stomach with one hand.
It took Elizabeth a few seconds, but slowly the realisation set in. Of course, her sister had another motive for visiting. Caitlyn lounged back into the pillows on the sofa; and as she did, Elizabeth noticed the smallest bump in her sister's waistline.
"You're pregnant; that's why you came to see me," Elizabeth said in quiet disbelief. Her eyes fixed on her sister's hand as it lay comfortably on her tiny bump.
"Wha-."
"Don't even think about trying to bluff me, Kate. How far along are you?"
"I...Oh, Lizzie, I'm 11 weeks." Caitlyn leant over to Elizabeth and grabbed her hand, a look of sheer excitement on her features.
"Does Ben know?" Elizabeth glared down at her sister's hand, as it lay in her own, and all she noticed was that her nails needed doing. This was so typical of her sisters. She should have listened to Alison when she said Caitlyn would only come to see her if she wanted something; and of course, on this subject there was no better person to speak to than the one who had disappointed their mother so much by getting pregnant with William.
"Yes."
"What did he say?"
"Well, we're getting married, aren't we?"
"So, it's a marriage of convenience?" Elizabeth's voice was cold.
"No. Ben just thought it would be more appropriate if we got married," Caitlyn paused and looked straight at Elizabeth. "You know after everything that happened with…" Caitlyn trailed off, willing her to understand.
"You mean after everything that happened with me." Elizabeth pulled away from Caitlyn, setting William on the floor and moving to stand by the window, looking out at the drive. Outside, the sky was clear, but the wind had an icy chill, and ominous grey clouds were starting to role in. Elizabeth reasoned that it was probably a sign.
"Lizzie..."
"Why did you come here, Caitlyn?"
"I need your...I mean, I want you...Elizabeth, please can you come to the society picnic with me tomorrow." Caitlyn avoided Elizabeth's gaze, a small smile twitching at the corners of her mouth as she looked at William playing with his Iggle Piggle on the floor.
"Why?" A cold chill rippled through Elizabeth. She wrapped her arms around her thin frame and rubbed her shoulders through her grey cardigan.
"We want to tell mum tomorrow, and I would really like you to be there."
"You mean, you want me to be the diversion?" It was a rhetorical question. Elizabeth knew she was the diversion; there was no one that excited her mother's anger better than her second eldest daughter.
"No! I want you to be my sister; I want your help." Caitlyn's voice held a hint of desperation; her eyes were stained pink, and tears threatened to spill out.
"Why? Because I'm the authority on getting pregnant way ahead of schedule? I don't know why you're worrying; mum with be thrilled. With that big rock on your finger and a bun in the oven, she'll think all her Christmases have come at once." Elizabeth's voice was dripping with disdain. No matter how much she pretended to be over the heartless way in which Mrs Bennett excluded her from their lives, she couldn't ignore the scars on her heart that her mother's treatment had left.
Caitlyn stared at her sister aghast. She and Ben had sat down the night before and run through everything that she should say to her sister, but somehow things weren't going to plan. Ben had Caitlyn convinced that Elizabeth would not be able to deny Caitlyn anything that she wanted considering the length of time she and Elizabeth hadn't seen one another, and that they'd been so close when she lived in London. But, surprisingly, Elizabeth wasn't overjoyed to see her; in fact, quite the opposite.
She wasn't fraught and overworked like their mother had said; she seemed happy, content. Somewhere deep down, Caitlyn knew she was probably going to have to report back to her mother and sisters, but what could she say – Elizabeth had a gorgeous, richly furnished country home, an amazing new Audi, a beautiful son - and she looked stunning. Elizabeth had been successful without them; she hadn't needed them after all.
Yesterday when they had spoken on the phone, Caitlyn had been the one in control. She had stood in her Gucci dress, tapping her Miu Miu heels and felt superior; she wanted to feel that again.
"Liz—"
"Don't call me that, Caitlyn." It was like a slap in the face.
Caitlyn started off tentatively again. "Elizabeth, I know I haven't been the best sister."
Elizabeth scoffed.
"But...I really need you now." That was it; that was what Ben had said: pull on the heartstrings. "I need my elder sister now more than ever. I'm sorry I haven't been there for you or Will, but please do this for me. I can't face Catherine De Bourgh, Anne Wilmsley or Fiona Hilton on my own." On cue, the tears started flowing.
Elizabeth kept towards the window, staring out at the clouds, memorising the shapes they made. With the room filled by the sound of William's playing – oblivious to the tension in the room – and Caitlyn sniffling, Elizabeth began to worry the hem of her shirt, whilst she tried to fight the instinct to run and envelop her sister in a massive bear hug, just like the old times. "Does Jane know?"
"No...why?"
Elizabeth shrugged. "No reason."
"Lizzie, will you please…."
"No, Kate, I won't. I'm not going to the picnic, and you shouldn't ask me to. Now, I think it would be best if you left." Elizabeth turned and scooped William up into her arms.
"Lizzie, please!" Caitlyn's cries became hysterical; tears cascaded down her cheeks, and she looked up at Elizabeth with wide doe eyes.
"You're too pretty to mar you features with tears, Katie. Now, come on," Elizabeth looked to the door and walked behind a dejected Caitlyn as she went to the front door. "Thank you for coming. Good luck tomorrow."
"Thanks for the tea. I'll be sure to tell everyone how handsome William is." Caitlyn turned one last time, hoping that Elizabeth would change her mind; she didn't.
Elizabeth watched the empty driveway from the front door for what felt like ages, the deep green leaves wilted off the trees as the patter of new rain began to beat against them. It felt like everything was happening all at once, and she was powerless to slow it down. Darcy, Charlotte, Caitlyn: it was all so confusing.
Holding William close made her feel safe. He was the one constant, the one that mattered; and right now, he had wrapped himself inside her cardigan. She let her rest her mouth on his hair, allowing her to inhale his scent, and she kissed him gently.
"I love you, Will," Elizabeth whispered and then turned to shut the door, immediately spotting Alison hovering on the landing looking down at them.
"Please, don't." Elizabeth didn't meet Alison's knowing gaze and walked dejectedly into the kitchen; it was definitely time for a coffee.
From:
To: Fitzwilliam Darcy
Subject: I'm too old to picnic
It's true; I'm too old to picnic. It's ridiculous - society's best (supposedly) dressed up to the nines, sitting on (over-priced) lawn furniture at some goddamn awful country estate, eating caviar stuffed sandwiches and Chantilly cream cupcakes. Hell is a house in Rosings.
You are one lucky bastard to get out of this.
How's Japan? Met any nice Geishas?
P.S. England misses you!
From: Fitzwilliam Darcy [F.]
To: Richard Fitzwilliam
Subject: Getting a touch theatrical?
Please excuse my next moment of immaturity – HAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Stop being so dramatic, it won't be that bad. It will be dull, but I'm sure you'll live to fight another day.
Well, it's good to hear you've been missing me, and you won't have to wait long; I'm coming home a day early – in 11 hours to be precise, I'll be at the airport; and no, I'm not coming to the picnic.
P.S. Call Reynolds, she'll arrange for the house to be cleaned – don't even try to deny the party; it's beneath you!
Enjoy the picnic.
A/N: Thanks again to scmema for beta'ing this chapter, Loli-pop0394 for reading this first and to alice-in-vunderland who I am missing and hope comes back soon.
Thoughts?