A/N: Let me start off by saying that, as a nurse, I do NOT condone co-sleeping with your baby! But as they did not know what we know these days, and I know what exhaustion can do to a parent, I understand that this was considered perfectly normal then. So please…no hate towards me for writing that scene in! Thank you all for understanding (even if you do have children of your own and DO believe in co-sleeping; not starting an argument here!)
We'll be washed and buried one day my girl
And the time we were given will be left for the world
The flesh that lived and loved will be eaten by plague
So let the memories be good for those who stay
-Mumford and Sons
Athelstan rocked back and forth, a motion that he was not fully aware of because he was dead tired on his feet. His eyelids felt as if two anchors had been attached to them and his legs ached as if they had just been through ten raids back-to-back. He begged for Finn to stop gurgling in his arms and to just fall asleep so that he could join Helena, already comfortable in bed and lost to the dream world.
The fire crackled and spit in the hearth, and its warmth made his drowsiness all the more present. Athelstan heard as Finn suckled on his fingers, the noise resembling that of a piglet while feeding. The thought made him let out a small giggle, and it was then that Athelstan was keenly aware that his sleep deprivation was getting to be too much.
Feeling tiny fingers scratching at his beard, Athelstan pried his eyes open to find Finn staring up at him, studying his father as he liked to do with all things that were involved in his tiny world. Athelstan smiled down at the curious blue-eyed baby, never able to stay frustrated for very long. Finn cooed and grinned back, snuggling into Athelstan's chest and rubbing his red nose into the shirt's soft material.
In the three months since his birth, Athelstan watched in wonder as his son went from a scrawny, almost alien-like newborn that ate, slept, and pooped his days away to an adorable, inquisitive little thing, his body starting to chunk up and his smiles due to pleasure instead of gas. It was amazing, he would find himself thinking, that two people could make such a wonderment of nature. He adored Finn; loved to wake up to his babbling every morning and snuggling him to sleep every night.
What Athelstan didn't adore, though, was the stuffy nose that Finn was suffering from at the moment, unprotected from the winter cold outside of his mother's womb. Normally an easy-going child, he was up fussing all of the time. It drove him and Helena insane that they couldn't find a way to help the baby. They decided to take turns as to who would be awake with Finn and who got a chance to rest some so that they could keep their wits about them. Athelstan couldn't pray hard enough as the days passed for the baby to get better and for spring weather to finally visit again.
He felt as Finn's body began to relax and the little snores began into his chest. Athelstan waited several beats before making a move towards the bed, taking every inch to sit on it painstakingly slow so as not to startle the baby awake. Lying down, he kept Finn on his chest, not wanting to take any chances quite yet; he was easily awoken because of the sickness and Athelstan couldn't stand much longer on his screaming feet. He pulled his legs up, bending the knees and taking the ache out of them, the sweet relief filling his entire body. Within moments he was asleep.
Athelstan woke as he felt a hand slip into his. Turning his head, he saw that Helena was awake and smiling at him in contentment.
"What?" he asked, his voice groggy. His legs had fallen to either side at some point but overall he was in the same position he had fallen asleep in, Finn still out cold.
"I wish that I could draw so that I could keep this picture in front of me forever," she whispered.
"You would need paper first."
She breathed her laughter, trying not to wake the baby. Athelstan grinned at her, loving that, even though they could barely catch a moment alone these days, when they did it was as if no time had passed. Her features seemed to have softened since becoming a mother but Helena was still the same beauty that he had fallen in love with. He didn't think he could love her more and yet with every passing day he found something new that reminded him how wonderful she was in his eyes. Watching her care for his child, cradling and singing him old lullabies, was just the icing on the cake.
"Do you want me to take him?" she offered, leaning on an elbow. Her hair looked especially red in the firelight.
Athelstan shook his head. "I'm afraid you wouldn't be able to get him back to sleep for hours then. It's best just to let him go until he's ready to wake up on his own."
Helena agreed, moving over to him to rest her head on his shoulder. As Athelstan took a deep sigh, Finn startled for a half of a second before taking a fistful of shirt and cuddling in to his father's warmth.
"Thank God," Athelstan breathed. Helena smiled and squeezed his hand before all three settled into back into their dreams.
"When are you going to take him out?" Gyda asked, playing with Finn on her lap. She had made it a habit to visit as often as the weather permitted; some days were one right after the other, and other visits could be as long as biweekly. Luckily it seemed as if spring were showing her first signs and the harsh winter leaving for good.
"When we know for sure that the days are getting warmer," Helena answered. She had just returned from the outside where she had been washing up some laundry of theirs, as well as Lagertha and Ragnar's sheets. The former had just given birth the prior day and Gyda had been having a terrible time of trying to get the afterbirth out of the material.
"He'll have all of the spring planting and summer chores as well as fall harvest to enjoy the outdoors. We want to be sure that his cold doesn't come back," Athelstan explained, helping Helena fold the clothes that were already dry so that she could hang more up.
"How are your mother and the baby doing?" Helena asked. She was upset to have missed the birth, wishing that she could have been there to help but Lagertha had insisted that the old midwife who had delivered Finn was fine and that Helena could stay home with her recovering child.
"Good, I think. She had a much easier time with Sigurd than she did with Ivar, so that was a blessing."
Athelstan and Helena nodded. "We will have to visit soon. Send them our love and let her know that I did my best with the sheets."
"I think Father will just appreciate them being clean; stains are not a problem. I just don't have the talent for washing them as good as you do."
Helena giggled. "I don't think it's talent so much as practice." She took the folded sheets, still slightly damp, from Athelstan's hands and set them on the table next to Gyda. "Can I get you something to eat before I send you back?"
"No, I should make everyone something to eat at home." She stood, showering Finn's cheeks in kisses. He squealed in delight from the attention of his other favorite person. "But please come visit soon. I think I may go crazy from all of us cooped up in the house along with a newborn!"
Athelstan kissed the crown of her head and finished it off with a loving hug. "Your parents are very grateful for you, Gyda. We are, too. We'll visit at the end of the week if the weather allows it."
Gyda nodded, hugging Helena and Finn good-bye before gathering up the sheets and leaving.
"I feel terrible that she's the only one capable of doing anything. Ragnar and Bjorn aren't much help, and Lagertha will be down for some time."
"She'll be fine," Athelstan insisted. "She's done this before and Gyda's tougher than she lets on."
"So another son?" greeted Athelstan as he stood at the threshold of the Lothbrok home. He and Ragnar shook hands, the new father beaming his pride before letting them in.
"The seer foretold of many sons for me, and here we are! Would you like some ale? Gyda, get Athelstan some ale for me!"
"Can't you get the ale yourself?" Helena scoffed before heading back to see Lagertha.
"She has a point, Ragnar," Lagertha spoke. "You have been running poor Gyda ragged these past few days."
"It's fine, Father," Gyda insisted, bringing the jug of ale over to the table.
"No, your mother is right. I am sorry. Thank you for your help," Ragnar said, kissing his daughter's head and taking the jug from her and pouring Athelstan a cup himself.
"Congratulations, Lagertha," Athelstan heard Helena say from the bedroom. "He's a handsome boy."
"Thank you. And Finn, you've grown so since I last saw you!"
"Yes, he's become quite the wonderer if you let him go for one second. He can be on Athelstan's side of the bed one moment and the next I find him on my side!"
Lagertha gave a soft laugh. "They grow so fast."
"Yes, they do," Ragnar agreed from the kitchen. "Priest, did you hear the good news? Our Bjorn is a betrothed man."
"Bjorn?" Athelstan asked, unable to believe his ears. He knew of Dalla and their budding romance, but wasn't this the boy who just yesterday threatened to sacrifice him to the gods for his father's safe return from battle?
The young man's face reddened at the attention. "Dalla and I have talked about marriage and I know that she will make a good wife. Her father has agreed to the arrangement. We are to marry after the harvest this year."
"Well, you are seventeen. I just forget how many years have passed since I first came here. Congratulations to you and Dalla." He shook hands with the young man.
"Thank you."
"It's about time we get one of you older ones out of this house to make room for all these young ones," joked Ragnar, wiggling his eyes at Gyda.
"It looks as if he will have darker hair like his father," Helena said to Lagertha, running her fingers over the downy locks.
"Yes, he looks just as Bjorn did as a baby but with Gyda's hair color; a perfect resemblance to Ragnar. He and Ivar could be twins if it were not for the age gap and Ivar having my lighter blond locks."
"We should be leaving soon for Ireland," Ragnar announced, clapping his hand on Athelstan's shoulder. "You are joining us, aren't you?"
Athelstan swallowed the immediate lump that formed in his throat. Glancing over to Helena and Finn, the baby smiled at him, gnawing on his tiny fist. Athelstan gave a weak smile back. "I suppose I have to," he answered, gulping the last of his ale.
"Just remember, we are doing this for them. How else would they survive?"
Athelstan nodded but did not fully agree in his heart.
"We will begin plowing and planting next week. I will have you plant while Bjorn and I plow. We don't need you overexerting yourself too soon."
"Hmm."
"Gyda, do you need anything before we go?" Helena asked, coming out from the bedroom, rubbing a reassuring hand on the girl's back.
"No, thank you. I think we're fine for now."
"If anything changes you know to come to us. We'll be going so that your mother can get some rest but we'll see you next week."
Athelstan stood and Ragnar led them to the door. He shook Athelstan's hand once more, saying, "I'm glad that our sons can grow together."
"As am I," he replied, taken aback at first. They waved and headed back towards home. As they walked along the fields, Athelstan inspected the ground beneath them, taking in any information he could gather from it. The grass was coming in lush and the dirt was soft from the early April rains. He bent down to feel it between his fingers, causing Helena to stop in her tracks. The land would be fertile and the harvest should be plenty; maybe he could stay home from raiding next summer. Finn gurgled in Helena's arms, grabbing at the air for Athelstan.
"Would you like to feel, too?" he asked, taking the baby and placing him feet first on the ground. For a brief second Finn seemed to enjoy the coolness of the ground on his bare feet before bending his knees and curling his toes, making a face that he was unsure about such a sensation. Helena and Athelstan laughed, enjoying the world as they had forgotten how to see it: brand new, through a child's eyes.
Athelstan put his arm around Finn's middle and the other under his legs, bending forward so that the little one could touch the grass with his hands instead. Finn swished his fingers through the blades, cooing as he did so, enjoying this way much better. After some time, Athelstan's body protested from the angle he was at and so he stood, placing Finn on his hip and taking Helena's hand to walk the rest of the way home.
"Oh Finn," he whispered into his son's ear, "You've made me the luckiest man in the world."