Author's Note: Ahem...so...this project has broken 100,000 words. That's the length of a novel, isn't it? O.O

In other news, this project has also gone north of 10,000 hits. At this rate it will become my most hit on 'fic' yet. (Ha…hit on.)

Okay, so I. love. this. episode. This (in my honestly humble opinion) is the only "oh gee look at that we magically transported to the year this show was being filmed!" instance that actually worked. I generally hate when Star Trek does this because, to me, it ruins the mystique…or the atmosphere…or something. This, however, is the exception to the rule…and boy what an exception.

P.S. – ::Deep inhale:: Ahhhhhhhhhh, the fresh scent of slash. Everybody can relax now, the fun has been put back in Star Trek. And oh what fun it is…bwehehe. From here until the end of the season, we have quite a ride in store, folks. Hunker down. XD

Season One, Episode Twenty-One: Tomorrow is Yesterday

So we join the US Air Force as a plane rolls around the deck of a huge ship in the ocean.

(((Duuuhhhhhhhhhhh, what?)))

We then see two military men, one of whom is obviously an officer and one of whom is checking out a radar screen, in a small room.

(((::Looks around:: Am I in the right place? Where the hell is Kirk? Shouldn't he be hitting on Spock right about now?)))

The random military dude tells the captain that he sees a blip on the radar that just literally appeared out of nowhere. Since that is more than just a bit weird, the captain makes the call to the right people who can go up and have a look-see.

(((Because apparently keeping an eye on the sky is left up to ONE man in a 10x10 room with a desk and ONE commanding officer.

Yay 60s.)))

A plane is sent up, and we see a shot of the sky and…the Enterprise?

(((What le fuck?)))

Kirk: "Captain's Log, Stardate 3113.2: We were en route to Star Base 9 for re-supply when a black star of high gravitational traction began to drag us toward it. It required all warp power in reverse to pull us away from the star but, like snapping a rubber band, the breakaway sent us plunging through space, out of control, to stop here…wherever we are."

We see an electronically dead bridge with all of its crewmembers (including the ones we all know and love) picking themselves up off the floor. Kirk makes his way over to Spock, who's checking out various technical things.

Kirk: "Mr. Spock?"

Spock: "Except for secondary systems, everything is out, sir. We are on impulse power only."

Kirk: "Auxiliaries?"

Spock: "If Mr. Scott is still with us, auxiliaries should be on momentarily."

(((Why thank you, Morbid Spock.)))

Spock then sees Uhura on the ground, and gently picks her up and places her tenderly in her seat, cradling her and making absolutely sure she's okay with a deep stare into her lush brown eyes.

…or he picks her up and plops her down into her seat with reasonable care.

Whicheva.

Then the lights come on sooo…yay, Scotty's not dead!

They start to get their shit together, and Spock reports that they're in Earth's orbit which makes sense 'cause they were headed in that general direction when the black star decided to be a bitch.

Uhura picks up some chatter that's not Starfleet and Kirk has her put it on the speakers. Both Kirk and Spock recognize the lingo and their ears perk up.

Kirk: "Moonshot? That was in the late 1960s."

Spock: "Apparently, captain, so are we."

Cue the dramatic everything.

(((Yay 60s.)))

The whiplash effect tossed them through time, and landed them in the 60s! What luck.

Then they detect a craft getting closer to them. Why it's an Air Force plane! And they brought the Corbomite Maneuver music with them! How considerate.

The Enterprise tries to haul ass out of there but is a bit sluggish since it just had a brush with disaster and everything. The Air Force pilot gets the "UFO" in sight.

On the Enterprise, they hear ground control give the pilot the order to try and force the "UFO" to land.

Kirk orders that their tractor beam hold the plane in place, but when that starts to destroy the plane Kirk orders the pilot beamed aboard.

(((Now here's where shit gets really interesting, REALLY fast.)))

The pilot is beamed aboard with his back to the rest of the transporter room. Kirk enters, walks up to him. The pilot takes off his helmet, but hasn't turned around yet.

Kirk: "Welcome to the Enterprise."

The pilot turns around, revealing his face to us for the first time.

Kirk takes a good solid couple of seconds to look the pilot up and down with a particular look on his face and light highlighting his eyes.

(((Did…did Kirk just…did he just CHECK OUT the pilot? We haven't seen a Dame of the Hour in seven episodes now AND Kirk is giving the MALE pilot the once over?

…

WHOA.

But hey, I'm sure it was just a blip, a random happenstance, a flesh wound.)))

The pilot is, understandably, weirded the fuck out.

"You…speak English?" the pilot asks warily.

Kirk smiles, "That's right. You can step off the transporter, uh-"

"Captain John Christopher, United States Air Force," the pilot states suddenly and with great authority, "Serial number 4857932."

"Relax captain," Kirk says gently, still smiling, "you're among friends."

(((Pardon me while I take a moment to say 'fuck sarcasm and witty implications' k? K.

……………………

KIRK IS HITTING ON THE VERY MALE PILOT.

HE'S SMILING *THAT* SMILE.

HE'S SPEAKING IN *THAT* TONE.

HE TOOK DAMN NEAR THREE SECONDS TO CHECK THE PILOT OUT.

KIRK LIKEY THE PILOT.

KIRK WOULD LIKE VERY MUCH TO TAKE THE PILOT TO DINNER.

KIRK WOULD NOT MIND BONING THE PILOT.

WHO. THE FUCK. COULD MISS THIS????????

::clears throat::

Okay…I'm calm now.

This bit is even staged to look like a big "Dame of the Hour" reveal. He's beamed in with his back to everyone else, he has the big turn around…this is not hard to figure out. If John was a woman, this would not be any kind of debate. But alas, he is not a woman…he. is. a. MAN.

Not so much "Dame of the Hour" as "Dan of the Hour" then, eh? What?

And we're not even through the whole shebang yet, folks. Not even close.)))

(((Oh, and don't give me the whole 'But Kirk was just trying to make the pilot feel comfortable!' argument. This should go without saying, but there's a difference between "putting someone at ease" and "hitting on them." They are not the same thing, they're not even in the same ballpark.

Also, you do not need to SCOPE SOMEONE OUT to make them "feel comfortable."

Kirk is hitting on a man. Deal with it. XD )))

Kirk tries to get John to come down from the transporter with a little wave, but John ain't movin'.

Kirk: "I'm Captain James T. Kirk."

(((Kirk still has the 'HIT THAT' machine turned on at full blast, btw.)))

John demands to know exactly what the hell is going on, and Kirk keeps his lilting tone going long enough to tell him to remain calm and they'll tell him what they feel like telling him all in good time.

Spock contacts Kirk from the bridge then to report that the plane has been completely broken up.

(((You know how Spock is always the one to interrupt Kirk when he's hitting on someone (legitimately or otherwise)? Well it just happened.

Mhm.

YEAH.)))

Kirk escorts John out of the transporter room. In the hallway, they pass a pretty brunette and some sexy "Ooo a female!" music plays.

John: "A woman?"

Kirk: "A crewman."

(((…that pretty much speaks for itself, yes? Yes.)))

Kirk and John get into the elevator and they head up to the bridge where Kirk sort of starts to try and explain the whole "We're from the future" thing. John is skeptical, because he's not a dumbass.

Kirk: "It was an accident."

John: "You seem to have a lot of them. However, I can't deny the fact that you are here, with this ship."

They arrive on the bridge.

John: "I never have believed in little green men."

Spock: "Neither have I."

(((Air Force Pilot John Christopher, you have been SPOWNED.)))

Spock approaches Kirk and John.

Kirk: "Captain Christopher, this is my first officer, Lt. Commander Spock."

(((Check out the look on Kirk, eh? He is so amused that he could just explode bisexuality all over the bridge.)))

Spock nods to John.

Spock: "Captain."

(((Spock is lovin' the moment too. This whole bit makes me go fangirl every. time.)))

Kirk grins at Spock, then looks at John…who looks a bit like this: o.O

Kirk: "Feel free to look around, captain. Don't touch anything, but I think you'll find it interesting."

John: "Interesting is a word and a half, captain."

(((Dear GAWD, the look on Kirk's face during John's line is just made of GAH and HAWT.)))

John wanders off to have a look while Kirk and Spock trade looks.

(((Oh the looks…they say so much more than words ever could. XD)))

Kirk and Spock step aside for a moment and talk shop, but it's not long before Spock notices Kirk looking at John.

Kirk: "Anything else on your mind?"

(((Translation: Does John look as drop dead sexy to you as he does to me?)))

(((GUH. UNF. WHAT?!?!

Maybe the (albeit brief) Slash Drought lowered my tolerance level…or maybe I've just been bitch slapped by more homoeroticism in the past three minutes than most people are all week.

Once again, the line itself isn't necessarily suggestive (although it could be borderline) but jesus FUCK the way Kirk says it is crystal freaking clear.

::Fans self:: I don't know how much more of this I can take.)))

Spock nods slightly.

Spock: "Captain Christopher."

Kirk motions for them to step further away so they can talk and Spock turns and starts walking. Kirk grins at Spock's back and follows him.

(((……………………

………………………………………………

………………………………………………………………………

Omg.

Wtf.

Bbq.

……………………

Kirk, you feisty. little. sex pot. He is just LOVING this whole situation, he's even loving Spock's reaction to all of this. He's just so damn HAPPY, and there is only ONE explanation to his HAPPINESS. It's called The Dan of Hour, and he wants it. BADLY.)))

Well Spock then proceeds to be a total buzz kill and inform Kirk that John can never go back home because if someone were to find out about the whole "future" thing and use it to their advantage it could like seriously fuck some shit up.

Spock: "And if it is changed, captain, you and I and all that we know might not even exist."

(((Hey, there's that 'you and I' stuff again. XD )))

Kirk: "You're logic can be most…annoying."

(((Translation: Ur liek totally harshing my bisexy buzz, dude, what the eff?)))

Kirk then orders that John get changed into something more suitable and, after that, meet him with Spock in his quarters.

Kirk leaves while John and Spock have an awkward moment of eye contact.

(((Okay, so at first glance this moment could be taken as John wondering why the hell Kirk is acting so "weird" towards him, with Spock's expression meaning "uh…he LIKES you…idiot."

But, there's one thing that keeps this from being really squee worthy:

Uhura's expression during the moment between John and Spock goes from 'I don't know what's going on' to 'I know what's going on' which implies that the awkwardness of the moment is from John still getting used to looking at an "alien." It implies this because we never get any real hints that Uhura has a clue about Kirk's sexuality (or his hitting on John) or the romantic tension going on with Spock. Not like McCoy, McCoy knows what's going down. Uhura is different, she's in the dark, which means that if this was a real telling moment, she ultimately wouldn't understand.

That all makes me say that this is an almost-moment. It comes pretty darn close, though.)))

Cut to Kirk in his quarters, telling the computer to start recording. The computer answers in a husky, sexy female voice. We don't get a chance to really see Kirk's reaction because John and Spock enter, but then this happens:

Kirk (to computer): "Captain's Log, supplemental: Engineering officer Scott informs warp engines damaged, but can be made operational and re-energized."

Computer: "Computed and recorded, dear."

Everyone notices how odd that sounded.

Kirk: "Computer, you will not address me in that manner. Compute."

Computer: "Computed…dear."

Kirk shoots an 'oy' look at Spock, who rolls his eyes.

(((Bahaha, this is so amazingly awkward. Whoever thought of this bit was brilliant.)))

Kirk: "Mr. Spock, I ordered this computer and it's linking systems repaired."

(((Note that Spock looks very, "Yes, yes, I know what's coming, I have an answer, oyyyyy" expression. Adorable.)))

Spock: "I have investigated it, captain. To correct the fault will require an overhaul of the entire computer system. Minimum of three weeks at a Star Base."

John seems to think this is pretty damn funny…because it is.

Kirk: "I wouldn't mind so much if it didn't get so…affectionate."

Spock: "It also has an unfortunate tendency to giggle."

(((Omg…okay show stop it…the cuteness of Annoyed Spock…it's too much…)))

John: "I take it that a lady computer is not routine."

Spock: "We put in to Signet 14 for general repair and maintenance. Signet 14 is a planet dominated by women. They seemed to feel the ship's computer system lacked personality. They gave it one. Female, of course."

(((Oh my Spock, are you annoyed by the female voice? The delivery of that last line screams that you are. Fascinating…)))

Kirk then drops the bomb that they can't send John back, which wipes the smile off the pilot's face. John tries to argue that his disappearance would affect the future, but Spock says that he checked it out and John doesn't make any particular contribution by him.

(((Well that's kind of a bummer to hear. 'Hey, you end up not impacting the world in any way. They really won't miss you. In fact we're probably doing them a favor. Nobody likes you. They told me.'

…or something.)))

John then reveals that he's not totally sold with Kirk's whole "story" and that he wants to get back to his wife and kids.

Scotty then chimes in from engineering that things should be ready to go in four hours but hey there's not much point 'cause its not like they can go to Starfleet or anything.

We come back from commercial to find Kirk in his quarters.

Kirk: "Captain's Log, Stardate 3113.7: Our engines are being repaired, but we are still locked in time and we have a aboard a passenger whom we do not want but we cannot return."

Computer: "Recommendation for his disposition, dear."

Kirk: "…Maintenance note: My recording computer has a serious malfunction. Recommend that it either be corrected…or scrapped. Compute."

Computer (in the most pouty tone possible): "…computed."

(((Hi-larious. XD )))

Spock chimes in from somewhere and says that he's found out something very important about John. Kirk tells Spock to come to his quarters, then tries to contact John to tell him the same…only John's not in his quarters!! Kirk puts security on alert and heads to the transporter room.

Cut to John attacking a random crewman and stealing a phaser, then trying to bully the transporter room operator into beaming him back down to Earth.

Fortunately Kirk pops up and knocks him down with a quick judo chop.

Cut to sick bay. Kirk and McCoy are standing over a still-knocked-out John.

Kirk says that he just CAN'T send John back, and McCoy wonders if they can even get back. Kirk then moves the conversation a whopping seven feet away to give John some quiet, because voices only travel five feet at max.

(((Yay 60s.)))

Kirk worries that, even if they do get back, John will be useless.

(((Well not totally useless. Sex slaves make quite the salary, I hear.

………

Couldn't resist.)))

McCoy: "But maybe he could be re-trained, re-educated."

Kirk: "Now you're sounding like Spock."

McCoy: "If you're gonna get nasty, I'm gonna leave."

(((Only DeForest could deliver the line like that, and it. is. hysterical.)))

John comes around then, and doesn't like what they're talking about. Then Spock comes in to join the fun.

Kirk: "You said you had some additional information, Mr. Spock?"

Spock: "I made an error in my computations."

McCoy: "Oh? This could be an historic occasion."

(((::Sigh:: We miss you, Mr. Kelley.)))

Spock then informs everyone that John's future son will make a significant contribution to space travel, so John needs to get back to Earth to, you know, have sex.

Transition to later in a meeting room, where Kirk/Spock/John are trying to figure out exactly how to get John back to Earth and leave him without any evidence to back up his story. Well John apparently took pictures, which will be developed pretty quickly at the military base, and they were also recording his transmissions so that's pretty damning evidence as well.

Kirk tries to use the 'hey didn't people in the 60s dismiss this stuff as weather balloons or something equally as lame?' But Spock instantly comes back with, 'Uh, cap'n? We kind of destroyed one of their planes with a TRACTOR BEAM, the famous 'weather balloon' explanation won't quite cut it.'

Kirk then asks if Spock has any theories on how to get the Enterprise home, to which Spock basically answers, "We'll do what we did to get here…only in reverse."

Kirk then stands and walks over to John.

Kirk: "We're gonna have to go back and get those reports and photos. Captain feels duty bound to report what he saw, there won't be any evidence to back him up."

John: "That makes me out to be either a liar or a fool."

Kirk grins slightly and looks John over.

Kirk: "Perhaps."

(((Jesus, Kirk, can you keep in your pants for TWO SECONDS, we've got PLOT happening here.)))

Spock: "Not at all."

(((Translation: HEY GUYS, OVER HERE! REMEMBER ME, THE DUDE WITH THE WEIRD EARS? YEAH, I'M IN THE ROOM.)))

Spock: "You'll simply be one of the thousands who thought they saw a UFO."

(((Translation: You'll have noooo problem sliding right back into your old life which is NOT where Kirk is. It'll be fun. Promise.)))

(((Spock even uses the line of dialogue to move right next to Kirk (who's still grinning at John, by the way).

Poor Spock, he's doing his best to stick the proverbial flag in his man.

…………

Gay what? Slash what?)))

John then says that he knows his way around the base and wants to help, but Kirk won't let him tag along 'cause it would endanger both John and his future son so John agrees to just sketch the layout.

Transition to Kirk and Sulu beaming into the military base.

(((Sulu? Why not Spock? I guess Spock had to keep an eye on John? Who knows.)))

As Kirk and Sulu walk down the hall, they're amused by the incredibly ancient look of the place.

(((A very nice touch, I might add. Yay Star Trek.)))

They find the room they need to be in, unlock it with a fancy device, and go on inside and find the computer.

Cut to Spock and McCoy in the transporter room. McCoy is all freaking out and worried about Kirk and Sulu, while Spock is merely calm and rational.

(((Shock. Amazement.)))

McCoy: "How long have they been down there?"

Spock: "Fifteen minutes, twenty-eight seconds."

(((Cool your jets, it's his job to know that kind of stuff.

…That doesn't stop it from being cute, I'm just saying…job.)))

McCoy: "Shouldn't they be coming up?"

Spock: "It is a fact, doctor, that prowling by stealth is more time consuming than any direct approach. In our case-"

McCoy: "Shouldn't you be working on your time warp calculations, Mr. Spock?"

Spock: "I am."

(((Has nobody learned that you don't mess with Spock? NOBODY???)))

Meanwhile, back on the base, Kirk and Sulu are interrupted by a sergeant that catches them with their hand in the cookie jar. He points a gun at them and tells them to get their hands up and he takes their belts and Sulu's bag.

Cut back to Spock and McCoy. McCoy says that its taking too long (again) and this time Spock admits that something might be wrong and opens a communicator channel.

Cut to Kirk/Sulu/Sergeant. The communicator in the sergeant's hand starts to beep. He wonders what it is, but Kirk and Sulu play the fool. The dude messes with the communicator and triggers the emergency signal, and Spock then beams up the sergeant by mistake! Oh the HIJINX!!!

Back from commercial, where Kirk and Sulu are getting back to business. Now that they have the tapes, they leave the room and head towards the photo place. They get there and go into the dark room but whups! They tripped the silent alarm!

Sulu is still packing up the photos when Kirk leaves the dark room and runs into the security team that's coming to catch their asses.

Kirk closes the door to the dark room and proceeds to give Sulu as much time as possible while he kicks the asses of three security guards.

(((I love this whole fight scene. Kirk does whatever he can, he even throws his ENTIRE BODY into the WALL OF GUARDS.

Kirk, sir, you are lovely.)))

When they finally get the better of him, the Colonel looks in the dark room to find nobody, but is still suspicious.

Colonel: "Alright, where's the other one?"

Kirk: "What other one?"

(((Who me? Why I'm just a lonesome rascal who infiltrates military bases and attacks security people, I don't have any friends! Pssh!)))

(((Kirk's 'innocent voice' is too cute for words.)))

Colonel: "Your partner. I saw you looking that way and I saw someone move in there."

Kirk (shaking his head): "No no, just me. Besides, could anyone get out of here without you seeing them?"

Colonel: "…no. Nobody should've been able to."

Kirk then shrugs, and flashes an innocent-yet-completely-not-innocent smile.

(((AHHHDJSKFNEJKGND THAT SMILE.

It's one of my favorite Kirk grins EVER. The dimples, the boyish charm, and also the total SMART ASS subtext. UGH, can I keep him? PLEASE?!?!)))

Back on the Enterprise, Spock hears from Scotty that the warp engines are ready to go and then Spock takes his time inspect the photos Sulu brought. McCoy decides that now is a good time to explode emotion all over the place.

McCoy: "Blast your theories and observations, Mr. Spock! What about Jim? He's down there alone, probably under arrest! He doesn't have a communicator and we can't locate him or beam him back aboard without one!"

Spock: "I am aware of that doctor."

(((Awwwwww, once again we get to see Spock's internal struggle as he worries for Kirk but tries to hide it. Of COURSE Spock knows all of that, it's KIRK for chrissake! But poor McCoy just does NOT understand Spock.)))

Spock calls John to join the fun.

Cut to the security office, where the Colonel is interrogating Kirk.

(((What follows is one of my absolute favorite Kirk scenes in all of both the series and the films. This scene always triggers my inner fangirl.

You have been warned.)))

Colonel: "Now look, mister, you and I had better start communicating. I want to know how you got in here, now that's a simple question. Give me a simple answer."

Kirk is sitting in a chair, hands together, perfectly calm.

Colonel: "Nobody saw you, you got all the way inside here without tripping any alarm. How did you do it?"

Kirk: "Believe me, colonel…you wouldn't believe me."

(((Oh Kirk, being all oxymoronic on purpose…tee. =D )))

Colonel: "Don't try to be funny. How did you get in?"

Kirk: "I popped in out of thin air."

Colonel: "You seem to think this is some kind of a game."

Kirk: "No, colonel, I know it's no game."

(((You can bet your ass that he's telling the truth.)))

Colonel: "Alright, what did you say your name was?"

Kirk: "For the fourth time: My name is James T. Kirk."

(((And I am sexier than you.)))

Colonel: "And how did you get inside a top security installation, James T. Kirk?"

Kirk: "I told you, you wouldn't believe me."

The Colonel gives up for a second and goes over to Kirk's things to check them out. He picks up a small device (phaser) that instantly makes Kirk a bit nervous.

Kirk: "Uh, colonel, would you mind being careful with that?"

Colonel: "Oh, that worries you a little bit, huh? What is it, a radio? Transmitter of some kind?"

Kirk: "Some kind."

Colonel: "You could be more specific than that, Kirk, I don't like mysteries."

Kirk: "You don't stop being careless with that and you'll have one. A big one."

Colonel: "I'll have it disassembled and examined. We are not dummies, mister, we know how to find out things we want to know."

(((Is Kirk intimidated by ANY of this?

FUCK NO.

Must. Love. Kirk.)))

The Colonel then casually tosses the device to the nearby guard, and Kirk flinches by closing his eyes.

(((Goddamnit Shatner, I freaking love you.

This little detail is sooooo nice to watch. It comes so naturally, so second nature, it's 100% believable and also so deceptively simple looking. Even if the director told him to do it, it came down to him to make it so seamless, and he did just that.

GUH, I love that man.)))

Colonel: "What is that? Is that a uniform of some kind?"

Kirk: "This little thing? Something I slipped on."

(((Marry me, you snarky BASTARD!!!)))

Colonel: "Kirk, maybe you don't realize how serious this is. Sabotage of a government installation-"

Kirk: "I sabotaged something?"

(((GAH, so much WIN.)))

Colonel: "…No, we stopped you in time! What would you have done if we hadn't found you?"

Kirk: "Believe me, colonel, nothing at all."

(((James T. Kirk: 2 smart 4 joo since 1966.)))

Colonel: "Is that what you're here for? Nothing at all?"

Kirk: "That's what would've happened if you hadn't interfered."

Colonel: "Alright Kirk, maybe this will make you laugh: Sabotage, espionage, unauthorized entry, burglary, how are those for starters?! And I can think up lots more if you don't start talking!!!"

Kirk: "Alright, colonel, the truth is I'm a little green man from Alpha Centauri, a beautiful place, you oughta see it."

(((::FANGIRL SCREAM:: You GO Kirk!!! EEEE!!!!! ::Knocks table over::

The way he says "You oughta see it" is absolutely PRICELESS. ONLY Shatner could've done that.

Is he intimidated yet? FUCK NO. He's also having more fun than a kid in a candy store and that. is. AMAZING.

Does life get any better than Brave, Smart Ass Kirk Fucking With Idiots?

I submit that it does not.

………………………………………

……………………………………

K/S excluded of course. =P )))

Colonel: "I am going to lock you up for two hundred years!"

Kirk: "…that ought to be just about right."

(((Final score: Kirk – 7, Dumb Fuck Colonel – 0.

Colonel…you have been KOWNED. REPEATEDLY. WOOOO! ::Passes out::)))

Meanwhile on the Enterprise John says he'll give Spock the coordinates to the interrogation rooms…but only if he gets to tag along. Spock reluctantly takes the deal, but John knows that Spock doesn't trust him. Spock corrects him though, saying that he does trust him…but only so far.

Then Spock/Sulu/John all beam down.

(((Spock has to reposition John on the transporter pad…another lovely little detail.)))

Then a completely irrelevant scene happens with the sergeant who was accidentally beamed aboard and chicken soup. Fun..?

Back on the military base, Spock/Sulu/John execute the plan to take out the guard outside the interrogation room door. Inside the room, they hear a knock on the door.

(((Notice how Kirk is sitting. Look familiar? He just can't NOT sit like that. XD )))

The random guard answers it. Who's on the other side? Why it's Spock! And he calmly gives the guard the ol' Vulcan Nerve Pinch while Kirk punches the shit out the colonel.

Kirk is rubbing his hand. Spock steps towards him and takes him by the wrist.

Spock: "Don't you find that painful, captain?"

They look at each other.

Kirk: "Yes I do."

(((::spits out her tea:: HOLY BLATANT HAWTNESS, BATMAN!!

Okay…deep breaths…this episode makes me a little too excited…give me a second…

Whewwwwww, okay. Let's look at this.

First big WHOA: Spock taking Kirk's wrist. When do we EVER see Spock handle anyone else like this? He rarely touches people to begin with, let alone like THAT. Just to make things absolutely clear: When he sees Uhura on the FLOOR after the ship is damn near destroyed, he shuffles her off into a chair, but Kirk punches ONE man and Spock gets all gentle and makes sure he's alright. Yet again, these two events happen in the same episode in order to smack us in the face with the contrast. Hawt. Dayum.

Also, they haven't seen each other in a while, and they knew how serious the situation was (and still IS, I might add) and yet the first thing Spock does when he finally sees Kirk again? He takes him gently by the wrist and asks if he's okay. How ridiculously sweet is THAT??

And now for Spock's line delivery, ohhhh the line delivery. It has a dash of humor, some sarcasm, but it also has that something extra that just makes it delicious. This + the physical contact = Uh. Mazing.

Oh, by the way, this moment is literally four seconds long.

Four. Seconds.

We would've seen more, but it cuts to John dragging a body into the room after Kirk and Spock look at each other. Sure, they mention John in a second and we need a quick shot of him dragging the body in to lead into John getting the gun off the guy, but the cut comes too early and lingers on John longer than it really needs to.

So when does Spock let go? From Kirk's delivery of 'Yes I do' and the lines following, I'm willing to bet that the contact is dropped after 'yes I do' because after that it's all business.

You know, my mind hasn't had the chance to reel in a- whups, there it goes.)))

(((Told you the drought wouldn't last long. XD )))

Spock goes into the back room to do something, and John pulls a gun on Kirk and Sulu. Ach, du lieber!!!

(((See, I said I'd say it right. =P )))

Well it turns out that John is dead set to report the Enterprise's existence come hell or high water. It also turns out that Spock snuck around the back way and is now behind John. One little Vulcan Nerve Pinch and John is out for the count.

Spock: "I suspected he might not wish to return with us."

Kirk grins and shakes his head.

(((Oh YOU.)))

They all beam up, and then decide to try the "slingshot/whiplash" theory to get them all back where they belong, essentially 'dropping off' John and the sergeant on their way back to the 23rd century.

(((Kirk still manages to throw a grin John's way.

……………

………

I KNOW, RIGHT??)))

They all agree to take the crazy insane chance to pull all of this off.

On the bridge, everything is prepared and its time for John to go to the transporter room.

Kirk: "Get your gear and report to the transporter room. And Captain Christopher? You only have about fifteen years so you better hurry."

(((::winces:: Well, with so much amazing goodness packed into one episode I can forgive them of one particularly bad line.)))

And with one last smile, Kirk sends John off.

They drop John off at the moment he first sees the Enterprise. It works.

Then they drop the sergeant off at the moment just before he discovers Kirk and Sulu. It works.

Then they head back to their time, and it works. The universe is set right once again! ::waves pom poms::

Cue one last chance to hear the female computer and have it annoy Kirk, then End of Episode!!!!

Spork! I mean…Score!

Times the Word 'Hawt' Was Used – 3

Times Kirk Brought Out My Inner Fangirl – 3473849

Spownage – 1

Kownage – 8

Times Kirk Hit on John – Priceless

General:

Time Travel is Featured/Discovered – 2