Sorry for being kinda late. I was ... away.

Hermione vs Ed Prt 2!! Suggested by Kame-tan! Enjoy!

I don't own HP or FMA, characters or plotline. This story is more like a subplot .... enjoy, and please Review.

Some confusion may occur, please tell me and I'll try to explain.

Prolly lots of cussing, especially since it's ED we're talking about.

There will be some hints about Boylove, mainly RoyEd cause I'm a fan like that. It won't be explicit, and all hints of pairings... okay, all hints of RoyEd is ultimately for humour. Humor. whatever. It's for fun. Don't take it seriously.

Rating. The day I move this fic to M Rating is the day I get 10 reviews saying 'change it to M!'. I trust ye people to be calm about some cussing and some nekkidness. No scenes, people. Remember, T. TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

I'm keeping the main story around two pages limit, even if I have to cut it in the middle of something.

Anyways.

Sphia - Okay... pink cat spit. Ew... I would have thought so too, but then Roy's a teacher; they'd probably go for the person more... near their age.

Msttl - :D

Nrtlm - Yet another one against pink! I guess it wasn't just me. :D

Ellia-chan - Ooooh... another one that seems to read my mind...

HrHym - none that I know of. I dislike making up OCs, mainly cause they're not from Arakawa sensei. lol.

LMstr - Lol, Cormac doesn't have a brain, that's prolly why he said 'I kno'. No, but it consists of what the beetle wrote about, writes about, and will write about.

Kame - Lol. Yeah, prolly. Especially since Ed ... well, he's got admirers from both sexes... :D Lol. I got something that you can't read my mind!! XD YAYZ!! but I'm going to lose my best reviewer!!! NOOOOOOOOOO!!

HstSl - Lol, Roy will do something. Later. Much later. kkk, I leave whatever to your imagination.

As Ed and Al passed the Gryffindor dorms, they could hear voices arguing over the thick stone walls. Being the ever-so-curious brothers, they transmuted a hole to enter it.

"Next time there is a ball, ask me before someone else does, and not as a last resort!!" Shouted Hermione.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. What's going on here?" asked Ed, noting Harry's irritated expression.

Ron turned to Ed, while Hermione ran up to Al. "It's Hermione, Ed-"

"Me?! Alphonse, listen-"

"She's been fraternisizing with the enemy-!!"

"You mean fraternizing," corrected Ed blandly.

"He and Harry just ignored me for weeks on end, and just before the ball, he asked me out, saying 'Hey, you're a girl, right? You can go with us!'"

"Hermione-"

"I don't even understand what the big deal about all this is," interrupted Edward, putting up his hands, "it's just a dance."

"You're the one to speak, Ed," growled Hermione, sending a glare at the shorter blonde.

"What me?!"

"You asked Viceoi out, and then you just dumped her!!"

"I didn't!! It was a deal-"

Al gasped. "Brother!! You didn't-!"

"What did I-?"

"What's the big deal, so did we," Shrugged Ron, "well, it's more like the girls ditched us, but-"

"You don't count, Casanova," snapped Edward,

"Don't call Ron a Casanova you flirt!!" Shouted Hermione.

Alphonse was shocked. The Hermione he knew would never insult his brother … well, not in front of him anyways. "Hermione!"

"I was being sarcastic-What did you just call me?!"

"It's right, isn't it?! First Ron, then Zambini, then Lee, Cedric, Corner, Corey and even Neville!!"

"Goyle, too," added Ron unnecessarily.

"Goyle?!" shrieked Alphonse.

Edward frowned and shrugged. "Who's that?"

"The guy that looks like a gorilla," supplied Ron.

"Which one?"

"The bigger one."

"Anyways! It just proves my point," said Hermione.

"Uh, no it doesn't!" scoffed Ed, "I never asked them out! I refused them, accordingly!! You're the one messing with people's hearts!!"

"Me?!"

"Yes! You and Viktor!!"

"Exactly my point!" exclaimed Ron, and seeing as their arguments were about to restart, Harry silently snuck up the stairs to the rooms.

"And my Brother!!" shouted Ed.

Al snapped his head to Ed. "What?!"

Ron's eyes bugged out. "WHAT?!"

"Viktor obviously likes you, and you know it, but you don't do anything about him and yet you follow Alphonse around!!!"

"I do not!!"

"Brother!! What are you talking about!!"

"I'm talking about her trying to make you like her while she still has your friend liking her!!"

Hermione blushed, and shook her head furiously. "I don't!! I only like Alphonse and Viktor as my friend-!!"

"Viktor asked you out for the ball and you ditched him!!"

"I did not ditch him!!"

"You were looking for Al, weren't you?"

Hermione blushed again, and crossed her arms in defiance. "What makes you say that?"

"You were there, almost everywhere I went, you were there, looking around for someone."

"I was looking for Viktor!"

"Twice I saw you had him right next to you!!" yelled Edward.

Hermione was red, her mouth opening and closing in futile attempt as to talk. Finally, she crossed her arms again and turned around. "God, you sound like Rita Skeeter!"

"Don't change the subject!!"

"Brother!! Will you just stop?!" Shouted Alphonse, getting between Hermione and Edward. "We're just friends, nothing more, nothing less!" He was glaring at Ed, and thus he didn't notice Hermione's face pale and her eyes water when he said it.

"Y-Yes! Friends!" she shouted from behind Ed.

Ed's expression changed from anger to cold anger. "… Alright, fine." Ed crossed his arms, glaring at Al. "I'll let you amaze me. Show me the limit between 'friends' and 'friends', since I'm so incapable, because I know, even without Mustang's advice, that being just 'friends' can't be applied to a couple with either one having feelings for another."

"Brother-"

"And," Ed interrupted, "if it is going to be a 'friends' relationship, I don't want her incapability of seeing other guys liking her destroy your friendship with Viktor."

Hermione almost sobbed. "But we're-"

"-just friends, to you." Ed's voice was cold. "But to Viktor it's not."

"Let's go, Al. We've wasted enough time here." With that, Ed transmuted another hole in the wall, stepping out into the hallway.

Alphonse, looking back and forth from the hole and a depressed Hermione, hugged her once more, whispered an apology and whisked out into the hallway, transmuting the hole back into a wall as he left.

"You know, brother," said Al coldly as he caught up to Edward, "you have no right to call Hermione incapable."

"What?"

"You didn't see the expressions on Ron's face change while you were there," said Al, his eyes staring off determinedly at the front, "you were right next to him, he was staring at you, he fidgets around you, he blushes around you – damn it he's an open book and you didn't even look at him. You don't have the right to say all that to Hermione."

Edward had stopped, staring at Al as his brother only picked up speed, stomping away.

"Wait! Al!!" shouted Ed as he ran up to Al. "Hey… I'm sorry. I… went a bit overboard with it." Ed didn't believe what he'd said, but he had to do something to appease his brother.

Alphonse didn't look at him. "You did."

"I'm sorry."

Al stopped.

Ed stopped.

"Just… try to be civil with her?" asked Alphonse, sending a withering look at his brother.

Ed nodded, but then added, "Just don't expect much."

Al smiled tiredly. "That's all I ask."

I really need to go to the toilet... tata!

Mrawgirl09