I don't own VK.

Debris was everywhere. The once beautiful Shirabuki manor was now nothing but rubble and ash. Kaname looked around him, witnessing the extent of a foreseen output of rage. Akatsuki arrived by his side with a grave guise and his hands in his pockets.

"The explosion was caused by a gas leak from the stove," he informed, glancing from the toasted chair falling apart to the collapsed piano across from it. Kaname remained silent, kicking the charcoal beneath his feet.

"How many bodies?" he then asked, seeing Kaien Cross approach them.

"A dozen? I'm not sure," the chairman dubiously answered. "You know how it is when vampires die. They crumble into ashes…and in this mess…It's impossible to tell if it was a body or just ashes from the fire…But purebloods are bit easier to identify." Kaname looked up at him, suddenly intrigued. Kaien pointed at an area on the east side from where they were. The three of them went over and saw the pile of sparkling sand scattered everywhere. Kaname knelt down, picking up a pinch of it to observe.

"Is it…Sara?" Akatsuki asked with hesitance.

"Which other pureblood besides her would be on this property," Kaien responded, staring intently at the glistening sparkles. "Kaname...What do you know about this?"

He stood up and then told the hunter, "I believe that my indirect actions may have been the little shove that he needed to have done all of this."

"He? Are you meaning Ichijo?" He didn't directly reply to him but noticed something of interest a distance away. "Kaname!" Kaien called out, following him to another section of the property. Kaname bent down and tossed the junk and pieces of wood aside, picking up the pointed end of a sword, seared with black from the flames. He dusted off the ashes and charcoal. "Do you recognize it?" Kaein asked, examining the steel.

"Of course," the pureblood responded. "I helped make it. It's a piece of the anti-vampire sword I gave to the Ichijo family."

"So it was him," Akatsuki inferred.

"It would appear to be so," Kaname remarked, taking the piece of metal. "I guess giving him my blood benefitted him more than expected."

"Killing a pureblood…is a great taboo," Kaien mentioned. "And is…punishable by death."

"Weren't we going to do the same thing?" Kaname interjected. Kaein didn't argue. "He just beat us to it...Akatsuki. Have Senri and Rima found Takuma yet?"

"No." The answer wasn't pleasing to hear.

"Tell them to stop looking," he gave the simple command and walked back to the car.

xxx

[Yoka's POV]

Each time I glanced up at my students, I hoped to see him. But each time, I was met with disappointment. For the past week, I've been trying to redirect my life back to the way it was before I had ever met him. Every time I felt that I was making progress, someone would ask – whether it would be Alice or the girls in my class – someone would always have to remind me of him, making me take two steps back.

If I hate him so much, why do I still want him so bad? I couldn't answer that, but I also couldn't bring myself to see him again.

"Uh…professor?" I heard one of my students say to me. I turned to my class, seeing them staring at me. I found myself having paused for too long whilst writing on the chalkboard. I faced the board again, unable to think of my lesson plan.

"Um…" I didn't know where to continue. "Class…dismissed," was all I could say. Nobody questioned my strange behavior, and they all obediently listened. I set my glasses on my desk, sitting in my chair with my face in my hands. What's wrong with me? I was perfectly fine yesterday and the day before. There was a sudden knock on my door and I turned to see who it was.

"Class ended forty minutes early," Kaname remarked. "You don't look too well."

"Oh…Ya, it's just a little migraine," I told him, not wanting to make a fuss. It felt a bit awkward meeting him like this, since I've never been with him without Yuki by his side. "I didn't know you were dropping by," I directed the conversation to him.

"Well, I figured you'd be teaching, and I didn't want to interrupt."

"Oh…" He noticed me take a peek at the long, slender object wrapped in a cloth in his hand.

"This is actually for you," he then said, bringing it up to me. I took it, finding it heavier than expected and unwrapped the top of it, revealing the handle of a sword, and I looked up at him, confused.

"It's Takuma's," he then said. "I found it underneath the rubble of Sara's estate."

"Sara?" I quickly responded.

"He killed her with it," he then revealed, and I stared at him, eyes widening with shock.

"He…killed her?" I muttered with disbelief.

"Is it so hard to believe that he would kill to protect the one he loves?"

The one he loves? Not this again…I didn't respond but continued to stare at him, overwhelmed by the news. I looked down at the sword in my hands, my grasp around it tightening as I said, "Why don't you just give it to him?"

"Well, I would if I knew where he was." He saw confusion cloud my face again and then continued, "Takuma's missing."

"What?" I shouted, showing more emotion than I wanted.

"The last time any of us had any contact with him was last week when he called Rima."

"What did he say?" I tried to calm my voice.

"He said his goodbye…" I almost dropped the sword when I heard him, feeling the energy of my arms vanish. My entire body felt weightless as I replayed all that I just heard.

Kaname looked at me, showing a bit of kindness and comfort in his auburn eyes that I've never seen before and then he said, "I know that you haven't seen him since the ball and that you have your reasons why..." He then gently placed his hand on my shoulder, leading me to my chair. "But I think you and I need to have a little talk about Takuma."

"Why?" I inquired, uncertain if I'd be able to hold myself together for such a discussion.

"Because as one of my most dearest of friends, he deserves at least this much from me."

xxx

The apartment was empty when I arrived home after leaving work earlier than usual. I closed the door to my bedroom, tossing my stuff on the armchair by the window. Lying in bed with my eyes closed, I held the sword close to me, feeling the roughness of the stitching integrated with the cold metal of the handle.

Remember! Come on, REMEMBER! My hands gripped so hard on the handle of the sword that I felt them shake. Why can't I remember? Why did I only remember the suffering? If there was pain, there must've been happiness! It's because of all the joy and losing it that resulted in all this misery. But why can't it all just come back?

[Flashback]

"Have you looked for him?" I asked.

"Senri and Rima cancelled all their shows and shoots for the past week just to look for him, but I told them to stop," Kaname said, leaning back in his seat.

"Why would you do that?" I questioned, hinting my disapproval.

"Because if they couldn't find him by now, they'll never find him at all. Takuma's smart. He knows what we know, and if he doesn't want to be found by us, then he won't."

"Aren't you a pureblood? Can't you 'summon' him? Teleport? Fly? Or even turn into a bunch of bats, fly all over the world and find him?" I looked back at him with no intention of being humorous. But he smirked, even smiling a little.

"It's not as easy as you say…I'm not a god, you know," he replied.

"That's not what I hear," I mumbled to myself.

He found my comment amusing again and brushed it away with another smirk. And then he leaned closer to me as if wanting to share a secret. "Out of all of us, only 'you' can find him."

"Me?" I didn't believe him. How could I find him if I didn't even remember him entirely?

"Takuma's our friend, but none of us really know much about him. He's not as open as everyone thinks he is."

"But I – I don't know – I–"

"But you do know. It's all still in there," he insisted and pointed at my head. "You just have to want it enough."

[End of flashback]

"I want it!" I recited aloud. After hearing what Kaname had to tell me about all he knew – about Takuama's disappearance, the ball, Sara, and her murder – I didn't want my life to go back to the way it was. I didn't want him to be out of the picture. But even though I said it, the sense of distrust and betrayal still refused to release its grip. I kept repeating those three words to myself, but nothing happened. It's not working. I'm trying so hard but I'm still so angry…and so scared…of what I might remember. I don't want to feel any more sadness.

I looked up at the window, seeing that night had come. I had been lying in bed all day, staring blankly at Takuma's sword. The drawers to my dresser were all open, my clothes and my belongings scattered everywhere. The closet was open, the light on, and everything was out of place. I had dug through my entire room, searching for clues that would jog my memory or hint to me in any way of where he might be. But all my efforts were futile. I had nothing. At the end of the day, I was left tormented by doubt and desire. I say I want to find him, and yet…after all that's happened, is that really what I want? Alice was at a friend's house, studying, and would be back any time. I should clean up then…I got out of bed, picking up my clothes and throwing them back into the drawers. Dragging my chair to the closet, I stepped on top to put the shoeboxes and miscellaneous documents on the top shelf. That was when I noticed a brown box that I had never seen before. It was placed at the very corner of the shelf, almost completely concealed and unnoticeable. I stepped on my tiptoes and brought it down. With a little sprinkle of dust, the box seemed like it was hardly ever opened once sealed.

"High school," I read aloud the label printed on the top before kneeling on the ground and opening it. There was a red ribbon inside, and I recognized it to be the exact same ones that the girls at the academy wore as part of their uniforms. I found an old diary of mine from that time, but when I flipped it open, rather than filled with writing, each page had a blue rose pressed into it, all except the red one in the very middle of the notebook. I set it down and saw a few pictures scattered at the bottom of the box. They were of me and…him. I gaped at the photos, clueless as to where they were taken and when. I look so...happy. The way my eyes gazed at him…I look…so in love…I placed the photos beside me on the ground, feeling my eyes begin to water. My attention then turned to the last mystery that was inside: a book.

I picked it up. Feeling it against my skin only further proved how ancient it was. The title was in some sort of old English that I couldn't read. I randomly flipped it open, seeing the rough pages having gradually aged and turned yellow. There were pictures of monsters – of what looked like demons – and portraits of people that I did not recognize. The men were handsome and the women were beautiful. Their appearances were unique almost alluring, even for an illustration.

"What is this?" I mumbled to myself. I don't remember ever seeing this book. And all of these people…these pictures…I've never seen them. Did they even exist? I turned the pages all the way to the front, and then I recognized the handwriting of a note on the back of the front cover with Takuma's signature below it. I read it to myself, "I love you-" The book slipped from my hands as I clasped them over my mouth and my eyes wide open with tears falling from the corners. My heart was pounding and I couldn't stop weeping. I swore that I wouldn't ever cry over him again, but this time…I'm not. I removed my hand from my face, smothered in tears as I smiled and laughed with joy, picking up the book again. I brushed my hand over the rough cover with tears dripping on to it as I continued to cry. "This was all I needed…" I enclosed it in my embrace, bringing it close to my chest to let its warmth engulf my once broken heart. The cracks mended, the wounds healed, and the holes filled. I felt so overwhelmed with happiness and love that it seemed like fiction. But it wasn't. It was real and I knew…because I remembered everything…