A Deal With The Devil

Chapter 21: Unresolved Affairs

Emily couldn't believe where she was standing, never in her life had she ever imagined she would be standing there, the worst nightmare could not be compare to what she was living right now. As much as she fought to keep the tears at bay she couldn't and they were pouring from her eyes; her heart had never ached so much...her soul was shattered in pieces. Emily tried to gain some composure but she wasn't successful, and sobs escaped her mouth against her will.

On her right side, Alana was holding her hand tightly...she was wearing a black dress looking at the scene in front of her with a pout on her face and sad eyes. She truly didn't understand what was happening, she was too little to comprehend that her daddy would never come home again. Jack was to her left wearing a black suit, and tears were rolling down his sweet face...he was angry at everyone but especially at God, why was God punishing him like this...why had God taken his daddy away, Haley was next to him, and she, too, was devastated...this couldn't be real, this had to be a dream. Dave, Clyde, Morgan and Reid approached carrying the coffin, setting it on the stand gently each touching the top in respect, all with utter sadness on their faces and tears in their eyes. They were sure their lives would never be the same after this. The news had been devastating for the entire team, and they couldn't even imagine the kind of pain Emily was going through.

She watched heartbroken as the boys placed coffin containing Aaron's body in front of her, and she began shaking involuntarily...she couldn't contain the immense pain anymore. Heavy tears began rolling down her face, she couldn't believe that Aaron was dead, and that he had died protecting his family, but she still couldn't accept it; she blamed herself. She had gotten there too late to save him, if she had just gotten there a few minutes earlier Aaron could have been saved, but he was dead, and it was all her fault. She should have read him better...she should have seen the signs, talked to him, and gotten the truth from him. Instead, she had pushed him away and said horrible words to him. she said she hated him, and she had treated him like trash. The thing that stung her the most was that the last words he had heard from her and his children were hateful words, painful words, and she didn't even have an opportunity to tell him that she loved him more than life itself even though she had believed he had cheated on her, she still loved him and would have forgiven him. Emily wished she could take back the time and fix everything and tell him how much she and their kids loved him, how he was the love of her life, and he would always be the love of her life, but it was too late...he was gone now, and all she had left was a broken heart and soul and an immense amount of guilt she would never forget.

As the funeral began, Emily tried to pray that one day he would forgive her for not being there for him when he needed her the most and for being too late to save him. No matter what the team told her, she would always feel guilty and she would carry his death on her heart for the rest of her life. It was her fault and only her fault. She closed her eyes for a moment unable to stare any longer at the image in front of her, and when she opened her eyes, the vision in front of her was very blurry. Emily blinked a couple of times and everything got clearer; they were still at the funeral, only Foyet was in front of Aaron's coffin laughing maniacally at her. What the hell was he doing there, how dare he come to the funeral after all the damage he had caused to her and her family! She tried to squeeze her hand tighter around Alana protectively, but all she found was the black dress her daughter was wearing covered in blood...Nooooooooooo, this couldn't be true...she turned around to search for Jack, but he was gone too, his suit covered in blood lying on the grass. She tried to move and run, but she couldn't; Emily blinked again, and then she saw the three coffins in front of her containing her children and her husband. Foyet had killed them, too...he had killed them because of her!

She watched as Foyet laughed maniacally at her.

"This was all your fault, they are all dead because of you..." Foyet told her, smiling evilly.

"Nooooooo, please, nooooooo." She cried...she wanted to reach him and kill him, but she couldn't.

"And now, I'm going to kill you..." Foyet said, pointing his gun at her...Emily tried to reach for her one gun, but she couldn't find it.

She watched as Foyet pulled the trigger, then switched to slow motion, as she saw the bullet flying toward her slowly...she couldn't move, then she felt the bullet hit her chest and everything went white. Emily felt herself collapse on the floor, and then she watched as everything around her began turning bright white, and all she could see now was a white light...was she dead, too? Wait! That would mean she could see her husband and kids again! She tried to open her eyes, but her eyelids felt too heavy, and she felt very weak and groggy, she blinked a couple more times, and her vision started to clear.

Emily opened her eyes slowly and realized she was in a white room, a hospital room. What was going on, where was Foyet and her kids and Aaron? She was so confused, and she couldn't move. She blinked again, and she slowly turned to see Clyde next to her with a worried face...she was in the hospital.

"How are you feeling, darling?" Clyde asked, gently squeezing her hand.

Dizzy, she felt dizzy and confused, what was going on?

"Aaron, I want to see Aaron..." She was able to finally utter words, her words becoming more clear.

"Not now, darling, he is still in the ICU, but I promise you that you will as soon as you are better, and they let us see him." Clyde stated, smiling at her gently.

Aaron wasn't dead, it was a dream, just a horrible dream...she tried to sit up, but she couldn't, it seemed her body was to heavy, and she still felt very dizzy and groggy, but her mind was completely clear now...they were at the hospital, and the doctors had told her that Aaron was in a coma, and she didn't remember what happened after that. Emily turned to the other side watching the IV bag that was slowly dripping into the tube attached to her hand.

"What did the doctors give me?" Emily asked Clyde, knowing that he had demanded they give her something to calm her down.

"The doctor gave you a tranquilizer." Clyde told her while sitting on the edge of the bed.

"I don't need a tranquilizer, I need to see my husband." Emily reached toward the IV needle on the back of her hand trying to rip it away, but Clyde stopped by holding her hands.

"Em, stop please, I can only imagine what you are going through, but right now, there are two beautiful children terrified because their parents aren't home, and we don't know when they will see Aaron again. They need their mother healthy and strong for them." Clyde said, wiping the tears that were rolling down her cheeks.

"Aaron is strong, and he will fight for his life, and he will wake up, and when he does you need to be there for him." Clyde told her, bringing her face to look at him.

"Try to rest, the doctor said we could see him tomorrow once he is out of ICU, and then if his vital signs are stable enough, they will transfer him to Washington." Emily nodded.

"Sleep, please, you need to be fine, the doctors are worried about you, and they won't let you see him unless you are fine." Emily finally nodded feeling sleep overtake her.

"Lanny..." She whispered almost inaudibly.

"Lanny is fine...she is safe, and she can't wait to see you." Clyde smiled at the brunette whose eyes were almost closed again.

"Clyde, thank you for being here." Emily said, feeling her mind finally give out.

"I'll always be here for you." Clyde said, kissing her forehead; she fell asleep again, and Clyde stood up as Dave was walking into the room to check on Emily,

"How's she doing?' Dave asked concerned.

"She's asleep again, she's calmer." Clyde told Dave sadly.

"Come, let's get some coffee...the medicine will have her out for a while." Dave suggested. Clyde, however, didn't take his eyes off Emily, he didn't want to leave her.

"She'll be fine, the nurses are here, and I don't think she'll wake up for a while." Dave replied.

"Alright, let's go." Clyde said, walking away from the room and letting Emily rest.

As they walked to the cafeteria, Dave examined Clyde...he knew he shouldn't be doing that, but he couldn't stop himself...as much as he hated to do so, he questioned Clyde's actions. Dave knew Clyde was very close to Emily, but he truly had doubts about Clyde's feeling toward her. Was it truly only friendship, or did he have deeper feelings for the brunette?

"What?" Clyde asked, as he noticed the intense stares Dave was giving him.

"Nothing, it's just you seem to be very fond of Emily, I know you're a very good friend..." Dave said politely, trying not to sound incriminating.

"Don't..." Clyde said, putting his hand out knowing exactly where Dave was going.

"Don't what?" Dave said, running his finger through his stubble.

"Don't put something where it's not...Emily and I are only and will always be only friends." Clyde said firmly.

Dave just looked at him, surprised that Clyde could read him so well. Clyde chuckled at Dave's astonishment.

"She's my best friend, someone whom I love and respect deeply...if I wanted something with her I would have pursued her a long time ago, way before she even met Aaron." Clyde told Dave sipping on his coffee.

"Emily is truly my best friend, and I would give my life for her; but my feelings toward her aren't in any way whatsoever that kind of love." He said, looking at Dave intensely.

"I've known Emily for a very long time, longer than you can even imagine, when you've known each other since kids, I'll say we're basically like brothers, that's all." Clyde smiled.

Dave nodded and smiled; he didn't actually know they had known each other for that long, but he accepted Clyde at his word for the time being. After they finished their coffee, they returned to the room where Emily was still deep in sleep. When she finally woke up, Dave and Clyde made sure she ate something and a few hours later, she was finally released. She was calmer now; of course, the tranquilizer she was given had a lot to do with that calmness, but thankfully, Emily had managed to wait patiently until Aaron was out of ICU. She had spent most of that time in the chapel praying for Aaron. Emily was calmer yes, but she still could not stop the tears that were pouring from her eyes. She knew she had to be calm...Clyde was right, right knowing she had to be strong and be there for their kids, that she needed to hold her family together and hope that Aaron would soon wake up and come back home to them...he had to be alright, he had to wake up, he just had to, she wasn't going to let anything happen to him.

Around seven that evening, Strauss arrived and of course, things got even more stressful for the team. Even while everyone was so upset and stressed out over their beloved leader's condition being in a coma and not knowing whether he would even come out of it, she read them the riot act, lighting into them like they were children because they supposedly had acted against the FBI regulations. It didn't matter to her that Aaron was in a coma, Strauss had to show everyone around that she was in charge, and not Aaron, but what she didn't realize was that all it did was make everyone around her, even the hospital staff make fun of her, roll their eyes and call her a bitch behind her back. So, after she screamed at everyone for about an hour, she finally gave her condolences to Emily and ordered everyone, including Emily, to return immediately to Washington with her on the jet...her reasoning being they couldn't do anything because Aaron was in a coma, and they couldn't help him until he woke up. The team, Dave included, stood looking at her like she was demented, and Emily and Clyde couldn't say a word, they were so shocked. The remainder of the team knew there was no use protesting her decision, so they began gathering their bags to leave.

To Strauss's face and to her surprise, Emily blatantly refused to leave Aaron alone in the hospital, for which she got into a very intense and ugly confrontation with Strauss. Emily told her with fire in her eyes that there was no way in hell she was going to return until Aaron was transferred to the hospital in Washington, and that if Strauss wanted to fire her that was just fine. At that point, Emily had no clue whether she was in trouble with the Bureau for her actions and the way she had killed Foyet, and she truly didn't care if she lost her job for saving her husband's life...she didn't give a damn. Emily also told Strauss that she had a life outside the BAU and the FBI and the biggest part of that life was Aaron and her children, and unlike some people she knew, her family came first, and she went on to say that, right now, the last thing on her mind was the BAU. Strauss was so furious she turned red in the face, and she got even angrier when Dave, too, refused to leave Emily alone in Michigan and would not return until Emily was home, and Aaron was in a hospital in Washington. Dave knew very well Strauss wasn't going to fire him, since he and Strauss had a secret affair going on that no one knew about...it was a thing that had started a few months ago, but he wanted it and so did she, and well, he kind of had Strauss wrapped around his little finger.

The team left that evening and Dave, Clyde and Emily stayed at the hospital until the next day. They had finally gotten Aaron out of ICU, and Emily was able to see him for a few minutes before the helicopter was ready to transfer him to Warren Memorial Hospital in Washington. Emily, almost scared, walked into the room quietly, to see him lying on the bed with an oxygen mask over his nose and mouth. Aaron was connected to various machines and that terrified Emily. She stopped next to him; he looked like he was sleeping, and he had a few bruises on his face and bandages on his head. He looked so vulnerable and that pained her so much. She slowly sat on the edge of the bed and tears began to roll down her cheeks. She couldn't believe this was happening to him, he was so strong and able to withstand anything…he had to come to soon.

She sat there next to him, holding his hand gently and crying. Emily was unable to utter a word she was so broken-hearted, and even if she could, he probably wasn't going to hear her. She placed a kiss on his forehead and one on his lips. Emily cried quietly on his chest for a little while unable to content herself any longer, and she stood there hugging him and crying on his chest until one of the doctors came and told her it was time to take him to the helicopter. She nodded and placed one more kiss on his forehead, and then she walked out of the room to where Dave and Clyde were waiting for her to drive her back to Washington.

Aaron was successfully transferred to the hospital in Washington, and Emily was able to get back to her daughter. Haley was in shock and heartbroken when she heard the news about Aaron...she couldn't believe that Aaron was battling for his life, and that the affair had been a total lie, he had never cheated on Emily...a part of her was so relieved because she had always known Aaron was a faithful man, and she was happy she could still keep that concept of him. Emily and Haley agreed not to tell the kids anything about Aaron's health situation that they were too little to understand; they didn't even want the children at the hospital until their daddy was better. Of course, the first couple of days were very long and exhausting, and the news about Aaron's health situation had been rough for everyone especially now that the truth was out, and they had discovered he had never betrayed his family, nor had he ever cheated on Emily and everything he had done was to protect his family.

Helen was just as devastated as Emily, she felt very guilty about the way she had treated her son, when she had believed he had disrespected his marriage with Emily. She had been out of the country for a few weeks but she returned as soon as Emily called her about Aaron's situation, and she felt heartbroken and in so much pain it was indescribable. Perhaps, Helen was the only one that could understand the kind of immense pain Emily was going through, because nothing could be compared to having the love of your life in a coma, if not having your son in a coma. Between Helen and Emily, they alternated watching Lanny and staying with Aaron at the hospital; of course, everyone else wanted to stay at the hospital with Aaron, too, to help Emily and Aaron. But, it wasn't the same for Emily and her mother-in-law. Both wanted to stay at the hospital every single minute of the day, if it wasn't Helen then it was Emily who was there; they set up a routine so one of them was there all the time. Helen stayed at the hospital in the morning while Alana was at school and Emily was at work. Emily had not returned to her full active duty position; instead the Bureau had let her return to her old desk position while Aaron was in the hospital. She worked in the morning and until around four o'clock in the afternoon, then she would pick up Alana at school and go home with her, spending a few hours with her making dinner and checking her homework. Of course, Clyde was still in Washington, and he had refused to leave Emily alone until Aaron came to. Clyde was his own boss, so he could take all the time off he wanted.

Around seven o'clock Emily would come back to the hospital, and she would leave Lanny with Clyde for a bit while she went back to the hospital to relieve Helen, so Helen could go home and put Alana to bed and rest some. Emily stayed at the hospital for the rest of the night until it was time to begin the day all over again.

They had hoped that would only happen a couple of days, but their painful wait had turned into weeks now, and Emily was about to have a nervous breakdown. She had barely slept in almost two weeks, she had napped a little in the chair in the room Aaron was in, but she had not had a full night's sleep since they had gone after Foyet. In addition to that, Emily had lost several pounds, and she looked very haggard and her eyes literally looked like she had black bruises under them. Clyde had tried on several occasions to make her go home and sleep, offering to spend the night with Aaron and call if he had any news, but Emily blatantly refused to leave the hospital until Aaron came to.

The sad thing was that Aaron had been in a coma for three weeks now, and there were still no signs of any responses from his body. Emily couldn't take the pain any more, she simply didn't have the strength to fight. She had almost fainted that morning while she was in the shower, and she didn't want to tell anyone because they would force her to stay home. But, Emily had to admit her body and mind were exhausted, she just didn't know how much more of this she could take. Emily's mind was her worst enemy at the present time: Was Aaron going to wake up soon? What if it took him months? Or years? What if he never woke up again?

Emily finally arrived at the hospital, and Helen left to go home to be with Lanny for the rest of the night. Emily sat down in the chair and tried to relax for a bit, but she simply couldn't, being in the room just made her so much more vulnerable, the smell the hospital, the image in front of her of Aaron unconscious and so vulnerable, it shattered her soul in tiny pieces. She read to him, but Aaron was still not coming back and she didn't t know what else to do. She knew she needed to sleep, but she didn't want to leave him, she was exhausted and she wanted to hold her daughter. Emily felt so guilty because she paid almost no attention to Alana since they had been back, and she knew she couldn't continue like this.

After being in the room for almost an hour, she started to feel suffocated, like she couldn't breathe anymore. She thought if she walked out of the room for a moment she would feel better and it would clear her head; maybe she needed some air, so, she decided to step outside the hospital. The night was breezy and you could see your cold breath if you exhaled…When Emily got outside, she still felt she couldn't breathe and heavy tears began to roll down her cheeks, and she started to choke on her own sobs. Without even thinking, Emily got in her car and drove away, she needed to be away from the hospital for just a few minutes, or she was sure she was going to have a heart attack.

Emily began to drive aimlessly, sobbing loudly, and she started hyperventilating, and her mind was getting foggy. She made a right turn at the end of the road and began to drive down the street, but her mind wasn't on the road. For a minute, she felt like her own mind had left her body. She wasn't aware of the tractor/trailer rig coming toward her at a high rate of speed, the bright lights of the tractor/trailer finally blinding her, then she heard the loud honk of the tractor/trailer as they were just inches apart. Emily didn't know how she did it, but she turned her steering wheel in the other direction and forced her car off the road as the tractor/trailer went passed her at a very fast speed exactly in the place she had been. Her heart began to beat faster than ever, and she finally let everything out…she got out of her car and fell on her knees in the cold grass, screaming at the top of her lugs and sobbing heavily. While on her knees, she prayed to God to help her get through this period in her life because she didn't think she could handle this on her own much longer, and she needed His help; and she asked for God's help to heal Aaron and bring him back to her and his children and to the job he loved so much for the good of the country, because he was so dedicated to making his world a better place. Emily stood there on the side of the road sobbing for at least thirty minutes, the soft rain sprinkling her but she didn't care, she needed to let everything out. She cried for a very long time, and when she finally was able to compose herself and calmed down, she got in her car, made a u turn and returning to the hospital. Tears were still streaming down her cheeks, but she was calmer. She parked her car again and went back into Aaron's room.

She slowly walked backed in, pulled the chair closer to the bed and sat very close to him. Her face and hair was disheveled and her clothes were still damp, her makeup had run off, and she looked like a complete mess.

She grabbed his hand and kissed it when she started speaking to him. Emily knew there probably was no point because he couldn't hear her, but she had to let it out, she had to tell him how she felt about him or she was going to collapse.

"I can't do this anymore, Aaron. I...just can't." She began, in between hiccups.

"You have to wake up, baby, please, you need to wake up...everyone needs you." She said, holding his hand to her face as she cried.

"Your mother and your kids...Lanny can't stop asking about you, and Jack...and I need you, Aaron." She confessed.

"I can't live without you, I just don't know how to...you're my life. I need you, please...wake up, my love, I'm begging you." Emily stood there crying and talking to him.

"I love you, Aaron, I love you more than anything in this world. You're my life. I can't be without you. Please, please, wake up...I need you...I'll die without you." She sobbed and spoke to him for a very long time…until she had cried every single tear within her system, until she finally fall sleep with her face resting on the edge of the bed, all the while holding his hand.

Aaron tried to open his eyes, but he couldn't, he had felt a very heavy object hit his head and everything had gone blank, and when he opened his eyes again, he saw Foyet on top of him and felt the knife as it perforated his skin several times; as Foyet talked to him, as he was laughing about him and making fun of him, one by one he felt every one of the nine stabs. Aaron could feel his body getting numb, and his vision become blurred, and he was losing consciousness again, but he had to get up, he had to fight Foyet, he had to kill him! He felt a pair of warm hands holding his face, then he heard a familiar voice, her beautiful voice calling his name...he opened his eyes again and watched Emily crying holding his face, but he couldn't hear her any longer. A very bright light started to blind him, and he felt it as his body started to move toward the light. It was kind of comforting now, he couldn't hear or feel anything anymore, and the pain and the coldness was gone. Now, he was surrounded by warmth, and he kept walking toward the light, something kept telling him to keep walking that way, and everything would be good. That same something told him he had to let go, that it was his time to go, he was dying and he knew it, as much as he wanted to fight this, it felt good, the most amazing feeling he had ever experienced, the calm, the peace of it was extraordinary. He watched as a couple of white figures appeared as he walked toward them. Who were they, and what was going on...the figures kept calling his name, and he felt himself smile. Dying wasn't such a bad experience, it felt so wonderful. He was just a few feet closer to the figures, when he heard the voice again, and he turned around...at first, it was almost a whisper, but then it became clearer. It was Emily! She was crying, and she was calling him; he ran back in her direction trying to find out where Emily's voice was coming through, but he couldn't get to her.

"Your mother and your kids...Lanny can't stop asking about you, and Jack...and I need you, Aaron." Emily cried, but he couldn't get to her, he needed to find her and tell her everything was going to be all right.

"I love you Aaron...I love you more than anything in this world...you are my life...I can't be without you. Please...please...wake up...I need you. I will die without you" He couldn't get to her, suddenly he began to feel liquid on his hands, like water or something, or was it her tears?

What was going on, he keep running in the opposite direction from the light, and her voice was becoming lower every time he heard it. He couldn't hear her anymore, suddenly he felt like he was falling down an abyss...he kept falling rapidly, and he didn't know what the hell was going on. Suddenly, he hit something that felt like ground, but everything was so dark he couldn't see anything, he had never seen so much darkness in his life. Aaron tried to rub his eyes, but he still couldn't see anything. He finally blinked a couple of times, and the darkness began to disappear, everything was so blurry, but there was no longer any darkness. He blinked again and his vision got clearer; he opened his eyes slowly, and he was blinded by a light again, only it wasn't the same light, it looked like a light bulb, wait! It was a light bulb. He tried to move but wasn't very successful, but he slowly watched as the room became clearer and clearer, wait! What was going on, this wasn't heaven, it looked like a room, and what was that beeping noise? He was in a room kind of like a hospital room, his eyes moved slowly in the direction the beeping was coming from, it was a monitor, he was, indeed. in a hospital...how had he gotten there? He moved his head slowly to the other side, he watched the raven- disheveled-haired woman and then he realized that it was Emily. She was sound sleep. She was sitting in the chair by his bed with her face on the side of his bed; he then felt the warm hand that was squeezing his tightly. Aaron tried to move his hand to hers, but it was hard...he finally was able to tighten his hand around the soft warm hand of Emily.

Emily stirred in her sleep; she had cried for so many hours that she must have fallen asleep, and something had woken her up...wait! She felt it again...the pressure on her hand. She slowly opened her eyes and looked up at the hand that was trying to squeeze hers, her eyes immediately looked up, his eyes were open, but he look very confused.

"Oh my God, Aaron." She gasped in shock!