**I am so happy to see people enjoy this story! I still have so much to tell. Short chaptrs are just as important as long ones**
Chapter 21: Human
The next few hours I ponder around the room trying to keep myself busy waiting for some word if Kylo is coming back tonight. Deciding the only thing I could do was retreat back to rereading the Force Bonds book. I quickly flip to the page of the two black figures. Running my fingers over the picture, I feel like its calling to me. The feeling makes my stomach knot. The smaller figures lightsaber is alluring. I close my eyes and picture how it would feel to wield such a weapon. I remember a story I heard when I was little from some villagers, that duel lightsabers where strictly said to be sith created. Could I ever truly fight for the Supreme Leader and with Kylo? I thought I was suppose to be the Light, I cant give in now. I need to find a way to leave this place. I refuse to give up. I shut the book and put it back. I know Kylos coming, I feel him. I wait in front of the windows and watch the stars.
He enters the room and walks over to me. His body inches from mine and he tilts his mask to look down at me. "Supreme Leader was impressed, as was I. I knew you had it in you. I just didnt think it was going to take all my Knights to bring it out or I would of done that in the beginning. I keep telling you about what power you have. Its undeniably strong." He looks back out the window. "Anger suits you. You act like your ready to accept death, but your fight like you have something to live for."
I throw my hands up. "Oh yeah, being lead to your execution by the man who claims we are soulmates. Your a monster." I yell and stomp off to the other side of the room. I start walking back and forth between the walls. "I dont even know how I survived honestly."
"Because you were confident and not scared."
"How come you opened the connection to help me?"
"If I would have opened the connection and kept it open, you would of been distracted and Supreme Leader would have noticed. I am not allowed to interfere in his orders. If he find out who you are to me he will force me to kill you myself. Right now, you are still disposable to him. But you earned yourself another chance, something Supreme Leader does not give out lightly."
"Im never joining the Dark Side." I state.
"You cant go back to resistance. Now I will warn you again what will happened if you alert them. I wont be so kind to spare them, ANY of them that come for you. And Supreme Leader wont allow you another chance."
"Why? Why wont you just let me go. Ill never be happy here being your pet soulmate. Ill never be happy with you!" Im lying to myself. Being with him, safe and protected, feels right. Even if I am scared of him, I am drawn to him.
"Are you denying that your called to this?" He removes his helmet and sets it on the bed and walks over to me. "Are you denying what you feel?"
He slowly walks over to me, like hes stalking his prey. His eyes dark and needing.
"I feel used. But when your not around I miss you. I cant see the end of this. All this time is passing by and I cant seem to tell you why but it hurts me every time I see you. Because I realize how much I need you. And that scares me. I dont want to join the dark side. I dont want you to kill me."
He wastes no time and grabs my face and kisses me. His leather gloves soft and warm against my cool skin. Its not like in the meadow, this is different. Its like he needs it just as much as I do. His one hand moves down my neck and over my shoulder till it sprawls out on my back, pulling me towards him. There has never been a moment in my life where I craved this as much as I do now. His body molding to mine. His kiss is deep, his tongue searching my mouth, his lips soft and full. He lets out a slight moan and his fingers press harder into the curve of my back, his other hand pulling my face closer. My hands on his chest, i slowly reach up to his face and my fingers trail up the back of his neck into his thick black hair. He pulls back and gasps. His eyes remained closed as he soaks in the feeling. He shifts his head to kiss me from the other side. And for a few moment I forget who he is, just relishing in his embrace. He pulls away just to lean his forehead against mine.
"Ill never fight for you." I whisper.
"Well see." He pulls back and walks to retrieve his helmet.
"You say your going to kill me but you want me to live? I dont want you to be the one who does it." I tell him. My heart racing still. I close my eyes, missing his touch already.
I bleed when I fall down. I crash and I break down. Your words in my head echo in my heart. You build me up and when you leave my mind, I fall apart. Cause I'm only human. His face freezes for a second when he listens to my words. Then he hides behind his mask again. He walks back over to me and he runs his gloved fingers along my jaw, my eyes close instinctively. I cant deny that I enjoy his touch.
"I am human too. Just an indestructible one."