Author's Note:

My sincere apologies for the long delay in the story - it wasn't my intention to leave the story on a cliff hanger but we were without any internet connection for most of the month unfortunately ... thankfully it's fixed now so I can finally complete this story! Thanks for all your reviews for the last chapter and for your patience.

December 21st

It sounded so clichéd but no less serious that it had been touch and go as Jennifer worked to save Evan's life. The laser weapon had been brutal … a few millimetres to the left and Evan would have been dead before he hit the ground. She held it together through hours of surgery to fix all the damage, and then through the hours of sitting by Evan's bedside in recovery, waiting for a sign that he was returning to consciousness. As a professional, she knew Evan could remain unconscious for many hours yet but as a loved one, there was no way she could leave him.

"Doc," Sheppard said quietly as he approached Evan's bed. "How is he?"

"Lucky to be alive," Jennifer said simply. "I thought you were letting Torrell raid the village without a fight. Evan even told me there was little risk that anyone would get hurt! What happened?"

"I didn't factor in how long Evan spent with those people," John pressed his lips together, his eyes on his second in command. "Torrell went after Eldon and Privic and Lorne just couldn't sit there and watch it happen. He was in the middle of it before I could stop him."

"So Torrell shot him?" Jennifer exclaimed, the horror of the afternoon catching up with her. Her hands were trembling and she felt tears too close to the surface.

"No – Torrell shot Privic," John corrected grimly. "Evan just reacted – jumped in the way. He saved Privic's life."

"And Torrell?" Jennifer said harshly. She vaguely recalled a second body on the ground but all of her attention had been on Evan.

"Dead," John didn't have to add that he'd been responsible. "Without their leader the rest of his gang surrendered. Rodney was steamed because he was all set to disable their ship just after take off. Instead he had to undo what he'd done so we could hand it over to Privic."

"What about the people Torrell kidnapped?"

"Ronon took some of the Olesian's and one of Torrell's men to their settlement. The one's who survived should be back with their families by now."

"At least that's something," Jennifer murmured, smoothing back Evan's hair again.

"You need to get some rest," John said quietly.

"Later," Jennifer replied.

Sheppard didn't protest … he laid a hand on her shoulder in support and then pulled up a chair on the other side of Lorne's bed. "Then I'll wait with you."

"Could you," Jennifer hesitated, unwilling to leave Evan's side. "Would you do something for me first?"

"Whatever you want," John replied.

Jennifer explained what she wanted and with a nod John strode off to get it done. A few minutes later he was back, two tiny scrolls of rolled up paper in his hand.

"That's some proposal," he murmured, handing her the scrolls.

"It is," she agreed, clutching the precious papers to her chest. It was crazy but a part of her believed that she'd been helping to keep Evan safe during their separation by honouring his daily message delivery. She'd missed two days and almost lost him … she knew it was silly to be superstitious but Evan wasn't out of the woods yet and her heart just couldn't take the risk.

Ignoring John sitting across the bed from her she unrolled the first message and read it silently.

"I want to wake up beside you and not have to worry about who's going to notice me leaving your room early in the morning. Call me old fashioned, but your reputation is important to me."

Laughing softly, she glanced down at the man she loved. He was old fashioned in all the best ways. He carried the heavy boxes of medical supplies she always got every Daedalus run, and stood respectfully when she entered the room. He'd open doors for her too if Atlantis didn't get there first! Evan Lorne was a gentleman, pure and simple, and she loved that about him. She'd never doubted that she could count on him because he wasn't the kind of guy to let anyone down or not live up to his word.

Rerolling the message she put it aside and turned to the second message.

"I won't die without you – you wouldn't want that – but the colour and the beauty and the soul would be gone for me and I know I'd never get it back. Never. Say yes and you'll keep the colour in my life for all the days we're both allotted."

Silent tears coursed down her face, the hold she'd had on her emotions broken by Evan's words.

"Doc?" John leaned forward, concerned.

"I'm such a hypocrite!" she exclaimed.

"What?" John frowned, confused.

"Evan's right," she held up the tiny scroll even though John didn't know what was written there, giving him a tortured look. "If something happened to me I would want him to keep going, to be happy again," she got out tearfully. "But I don't think I can go on if he doesn't pull through. I just … I can't."

"Don't talk like that," John protested. "He's going to pull through and then you're both gonna live happily ever after, okay?"

"Okay," Jennifer sniffed, trying to smile at him through her tears.

"You did good back there Doc," John continued. "It's okay if you want to let go now – I won't tell anyone. Cry – Teyla always says it makes her feel better."

She couldn't do anything other than obey his order. Burying her face in her hands and slumping low beside Evan, Jenn cried for all the days she'd lost, for the pain Evan had and would suffer before he was fully recovered, and for the future she'd come too close to losing. When she felt some calm returning she sat up, wiping her face on the tissues John helpfully supplied.

"Better?" he queried.

"I guess," she agreed. She wiped her eyes again, pushing back her hair as she looked at John. "Happily ever after?" she queried, finally seeing the humour in what he'd said. "I never pegged you for a hopeless romantic Colonel."

"It was all I could come up with," John excused, flushing slightly.

"Well, it was good," Jennifer replied. "Thank you."

Evan shifted slightly and her attention was instantly back with him, the conversation forgotten. Checking his vitals she found herself smiling as she turned back to John. "He's improving," she announced. "It might be a while yet but he's starting to wake up."