Chapter 21

The first thing that Daryl Dixon felt the moment he stirred from his sleep was the warmth of her skin under his hands and the steady rise and fall of her back against his chest. The second thing he felt was the sense of dread that she was leaving today to go back to her place. He couldn't help but feel a knot tugging tighter, coiling to the point of bursting. He loved having her there. He loved her. He'd all but told her. He knew it though, felt it in every breath he took, every flutter of his heart when she looked at him with those gorgeous blue eyes.

He cracked one eye open, peering at the clock on her side of the bed. It was past dawn, and flecks of dust traveled the stunted sun rays filtering through the blind slats. He felt her stir as his breathing quickened, and he pressed a soft kiss to the back of her neck. She moaned softly, arching her head forward before he placed a kiss between her shoulder blades.

"Go back to sleep," he whispered. "It's still early."

"Sun's out," she whispered hoarsely, stretching and arching back against his chest before relaxing and rubbing a sleep-lazy hand over the gooseflesh of his bicep.

"Nah, you're just dreamin'."

"I thought you said I should go back to sleep," she giggled. He froze before he buried his face against the back of her neck and chuckled.

"Shit." She laughed then, turning in his arms and greeting him with a sweet kiss. "Mornin'."

"Morning," she replied with a growing smile, as she hooked one arm around his neck and pulled him closer for another kiss.

"Careful. Ain't brushed yet."

"I don't care," she replied, crinkling her nose before kissing him again. He kissed her in return, long and slow, bringing his arms around her middle, pulling her naked body against his, running his fingers through her hair while her hands roamed over his broad shoulders and down his sides.

"Ya know, you're gonna be missin' this in the mornin'."

"You're awfully sure of yourself," Carol grinned, as Daryl rolled her onto her back, parting her legs with his hands and shifting to lay between them, resting his forehead against hers as his budding erection pressed against her core.

"Just know what I know," he pointed out. "And now I know that the only thing better than wakin' up next to you is wakin' up to you when you're naked." She snorted then, and he chuckled, flashing a smile that made her insides quiver. She sighed then, placing a hand against his rough cheek.

"You know I'm not doing this to hurt you, right? I'm feeling better. I need to get back home. I need things to get back to normal for a while." Daryl swallowed hard but nodded, pressing a kiss to her lips. What he couldn't say, what he knew might make it even harder was that this had become his normal. He and Katie had been doing just fine, but Carol coming along had just made everything better. Her presence had been a welcome comfort in their home, and with all of the changes with the adoption of Katie, having Carol around just seemed to bring a balance to his world.

"Can't blame a man for tryin'."

"No, I sure can't." She smiled then, closing her eyes as he pressed a soft kiss to her neck, sucking gently until her hand was moving up to tangle in his hair. And it wasn't long before getting up and leaving were the last things on her mind.

...

It feels strange to be home. After I lost Sophia, that first night without her asking me for a glass of water and a story before bed seemed to be never-ending. And that first day after my hospital stay was like visiting a mausoleum. It was so quiet and still and felt like a memorial to my little girl. All of the pictures on the wall seemed to taunt me, to remind me of what I had and would never have again.

But somehow, time has made it easier to walk through that door, and I seek solace there. Being at Daryl's was wonderful, and it brought me joy to spend time with Katie, and I feel a loss being here without them. I know I'm becoming attached, but maybe that's a good thing. I feel a sense of peace when I'm with them, as if something is right in the world. But I still feel that things are moving too fast, and I couldn't take it if anyone got hurt. I don't want to hurt, and I don't want to hurt him. But if Katie were the one to get hurt because of us, I don't know what I'd do.

An icon in the corner of her computer screen flickered, and she realized she had an incoming message from one of her social media pages. This was how she was getting messages until she replaced her phone. Tomorrow, Daryl was going to take her to look at cars. She had far too many things on her list of things to do since the accident, but she was sleepy and missing him, and that brief flicker hinting at a new message was enough to get her heart racing and the smile widening on her face.

Hey, you busy?

Oh, yeah, she replied back, I'm such a party animal. You know me.

Katie misses you.

Oh, fine. Use the kid as an excuse. ;)

Alright, alright. I miss you. Katie misses you, of course, but I mean, she's a toddler. She'll be alright. But I don't know how I'm gonna sleep tonight.

Poor baby.

I know. And this morning was great. I mean, I don't know how waking up alone can top morning sex or morning shower sex or morning oral sex after all the other sex.

Ok, now you're starting to make me miss you. ;) Just kidding. I do miss you. But I promise this is good. I don't want to wear out my welcome.

Not possible. You're always welcome, and you know it.

You're sweet. Thank you for taking such good care of me.

Hey, having you at the house was the best thing that's happened to me and Katie for a while. Of course it sucks about the accident, but having you there…it just felt right. Sorry if that's too much, but I just wanted to you to know.

It's not too much. And I loved being there with the both of you. It's just moving so fast. And I don't want either of us to get…confused.

Confused about what?

Carol chewed her lip for a moment. Yeah. Confused about what? She sighed and began to type again.

When this baby's born, it's just going to be me. Do you think you might feel differently.

You're asking me that now? You know I won't. My head's clear. I know what's happening. I know what I want.

Daryl…you say that now.

You think I'm gonna change my mind?

Well, no…

You gotta trust me. I've never felt like this. This is new. But it's the best thing I've ever felt. I never that being my friends' sperm donor would lead me to someone like you. And that's all I'm gonna say. The rest of it, I'm gonna say in person, because I want you to hear it from me.

Daryl…I don't know what to say.

You don't have to say anything. Just know that I mean what I say when I tell you I care about you. It's getting late. You should get some rest. I'll pick you up early tomorrow, and we'll go check out cars. Sound good?

It's a date. ;)

That mean I get to feel you up after?

Oh, shut up. ;) G'night.

Night, Carol.

Carol closed her laptop and couldn't stop the smile from spreading over her face. Though as she turned to start up to her room, she couldn't help but feel her heart sink. Daryl was right. Waking up in the morning would pale in comparison to waking up in his arms, inhaling the scent of his skin, feel his hands and mouth on her, tasting the salt of his skin and feeling the warmth of his breath against her neck. She was falling, and she was beginning to understand that something that felt so good could also hurt more than words could say.