As you might have guessed, this chapter is all about Marie.

Marie: Finally! I can lay claim to an entire chapter!

Well, it wasn't my idea.

Marie; Wait, what?

*Glances over at Elena, who is watching with an evil grin on her face, a whip in hand.* The slave driver over there was curious about your exploits.

Marie: *Waves* Hi, Slave driver! Thanks for the chapter!

*Facepalm* as Elena grins and waves happily back.

Marie: *Looks at me* It was only polite to thank her for the chapter.

Somebody save me!

Snape: I'm here to rescue you! *Is dressed in fabulous medieval armor, complete with a helmet. The helmet's visor slids down and hits him in the nose.* Ow! *Growls* Nobody is allowed to torment Melda into oblivion except for me! *Shows a piece of paper* I have a patent on it!

E-But I am her forceful Muse. If it weren't for me, nobody would ever get another chapter until Melda was naturally inspired. I artificially inspire her. *bows* And to all of the You've Got Fanmail fans, you're welcome. I will continue to bribe, manipulate, and torture your beloved Melda into writing more chapters. *Chuckles evily* Five per day, if she doesn't drop dead of pink exposure.

But you wouldn't go that far! *Pleadingly* I mean, if I were dead, you wouldn't get any more chapters!

E- Just hurry up and get the chapter posted already. Or I will force you to look at more pink! *Laughs evilly for several seconds* And then I would take you to a park and force you to watch the squirrels! And I would then make you babysit children! HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

I own nothing except my OCs and the plot. *Tiny Tear* Somebody save me, please?

Marie thoughtfully tapped the pen against her lips. She glanced down at the paper in front of her and giggled. For the past three days, she'd amused herself by writing out ways to annoy her friends. Right now, she was on Jareth and she already had about two hundred ways and she knew that there would be more than that.

She shrugged. Still, even if she made it up to three hundred that was a whole lot less than what she'd come up with for Snape. She snickered, for Severus, she'd managed to conjure up ONE THOUSAND ways to torment him. In fact, she'd nearly filled up a whole notebook with the possibilities.

Suddenly, another wave of ideas hit her and she scribbled them down.

*204. Ask him if Air Freshener works on the Bog.*

*205. Tell him that his bathroom must be part of the Bog.*

* him in the middle of an important military speech.*

*207. Try to convince him that you would not prank him if he were not a figment of your insanity.*

*208. Make him try to prove he is real.*

Marie rolled over laughing. She knew her friends so well, that she could figure out what would make them go crazy with ease. She sighed and turned the page over to begin another round of teasing His Majesty. She felt closer to them this way, as if they could tell that she was teasing them from afar.

Marie went on for another hour and made it to three hundred, but couldn't think of any more, so she skipped on ahead to Willy.

*1. Tell him you hate chocolate.*

*2. Go for a swim in the Chocolate River.

*3. Give his workers the day off.*

*4. Tell him his father is coming for a visit.*

*5. Force him to go to the dentist.*

*6. Steal his latex gloves.

*7. Lick his cane.*

*8. Tell him it was because you wanted to see if /everything/ really was eatable.

And so, this is how Marie occupied most of her time aboard the Nautilus. However, she was soon alerted by one of the ship's crewmembers that dinner would be served.

She thanked him and set down her work. She followed him closely, not wanting to get terribly lost within the bowls of the ship. She frowned. That sounded disgusting. /Lost within the bowels of the ship/. That made it sound as if the ship were constipated with people. This caused her to lose her appitite temporarily, which returned with a vengence when the delicious smells coming from the dining room wafted in her direction.

She came over and a chair seemed to pull out by itself, but she smiled because she knew who it was. "Thank you." She said politely to the invisibe man. "But don't you think it's rather bad form to run about a ship naked? I understand that nobody can see anything, but don't you get cold?"

Rodney Skinner laughed and his voice was right in her ear. "Thah col' 'elps ta keep cer'ain /things/ un'er con'rol, luv." He said in his heavy accent.

She blushed deeply and laughed with him. Somehow, Mina was able to get an elbow into Skinner's stomach and shut him up. Mina growled at him. "It's not like a gentleman to proposition a married lady."

"Ah never prosishuned nobudy!" He claimed. "All Ah meant was tha' the col' is very refreshin'."

Mina glowered at him speculatively. "Yes. I'm sure that's /all/ you meant." She replied, her voice laden with sarcasm. "And you call yourself the 'Gentleman Theif'." She waved a dismissive arm in his direction.

"Mina." Alan Quartermain said warningly. "Skinner." He frowned in the invisible man's general direction. "You are not children, do not start a squabble at the table."

"Indeed!" Said Tom Sawyer. He was just coming up to the table. His sandy blond hair was ruffled and he had a rifle slung across his back. "Civilized people don't fight at the table. It messes with the process of digestion."

"An where do ya get off when ya come ta thah table lookin' like ya just came back from a Safari?" Skinner scoffed.

Tom rolled his eyes, but sat down anyway. He didn't mean to, but the rifle smacked Marie in the back of the head and she saw stars. Literally. She saw Brad Pitt, Selena Gomez, and Miley Cyrus blowing kisses at her. She blinked and the celebrites were gone. Tom apologized multiple times even though she told him not to worry.

Capt. Nemo sat down at the head of the table and smiled pleasently. He looked at Marie with concern. "Are you hurt?"

Marie grinned and shook her head. "Nothing I can't handle. Just a bit of a knock upside the noggin." She rapped the side of her head. "Tom just accidentally brained me with his gun."

Nemo sighed. "What have I told you all about bringing weapons to the table?"

"Only bring the small ones." They said in chorus. Tom took off the rifle and set to up against the wall. He came back to the table with a depressed look on his face. Marie patted him gently on the shoulder.

A waiter was on his way to the table and stumbled on the gun that Tom had discarded. The food flew through the air and the entire tray hit Alan right in the face. His mustache was covered in sauce and he had a shrimp caught in his hair.

Skinner sniggered and was rewarded by being slapped with a fish. She didn't know how Alan had done it, but he'd managed to guess the exact location of the invisible man's head. It had now turned into a free-for-all, with seafood flying in every direction.

Marie giggled and stood up. "FOOD FIGHT!" Then she began hurling her sushi at everything that moved. She ducked a handful of flying caviar, which hit the wall with a wet splat.