"And the two of you have been together for how long?"
Amanda watched the television along with several of the staff and students at Muir Island. Warren stood next to her, his manner still awkward after their recent argument. She didn't really want to be around him at the moment. Amanda was still angry about what he'd said to her. It wasn't something easily forgotten.
Kurt's rejection and coldness hadn't left her with much room to remain angry at her only other friend though. It still hurt, having only happened two days before. Even TJ had noticed how tense and sad she was when she'd visited earlier that day. Luna had looked at her with big eyes and hugged her. Under such strain she wished she could have gone to bed early and slept until sunlight would make the world look better.
However, history was happening again. She knew she should be present for it so she could tell her children about these events, like her parents had told her about the moon landing. Henry McCoy, former senator and current cabinet member, was on TV again. This time he wasn't alone though. A woman named Caroline Trilby sat next to him, one of her fingers lightly touching his. David Xavier was standing behind the two of them, his hands folded behind his back and looking stoic.
She wondered where Kurt was. Someone had told her that he had gone with David, but she didn't see him anywhere on the television. The absence of her closest friend and confidante hurt deeply. His absence from the TV made sense though since he didn't work for the secretary. He hadn't struck her as being particularly political though. Then again, he hadn't struck her as a lot of things that he apparently was.
"Five years," Henry said.
"And we haven't heard about this before because…?" asked a reporter suggestively.
"I enjoy my privacy," Henry said, raising an eyebrow, "We had hoped to be married before this story broke. It would have allowed the wedding to be a quieter affair. Unfortunately that no longer seems to be an option."
Another reporter stood.
"Some may say that the nature of your relationship is…unusual to say the least. Why are the two of you getting marri-"
"Excuse me?" asked Caroline.
Amanda turned her eyes towards the woman who, before that point, hadn't said anything at all. An inner fire was burning in her eyes. Something in Caroline's expression told Amanda that she was going to rip into briefly felt sorry for the reporter who had decided to start such a question. However, briefly was the key word.
"Why are we getting married? Well, that should be obvious. I love him and I want to be with him for the rest of my life. And unusual? Are you suggesting that there's something wrong with me marrying the man I love?" she asked, "Or are you just against sapien and superior marriage?"
The reporter flushed. Amanda could tell a loaded question when she heard one. Depending on which newspaper he worked for he could very well be fired if he answered wrong. He would also come under fire if he said yes; plastered as a bigot. If he said no then his question would be redundant. Wisely he sat down very slowly, cowed.
She watched the rest of the news report in awe of how calm the two of them were. She knew she wouldn't be able to stop herself from becoming impassioned. When Warren had made his approach to her she had gotten angry, and that was nothing near as bad as what was happening there.
Yet, they seemed so calm and composed. If the couple had had any negative emotions about what happened then they had gotten rid of them before they entered the press conference. They were a unified front. She admired them for that, admired and envied them.
When it was over she stretched and headed to her room. Warren stopped her.
"Hey, Amanda," he said, "I know you're still mad at me…but you haven't been looking so good lately."
She heaved a sigh. Irritation choked her words.
"How about you run off and tell my family that I'm fine," she said, "I'm getting along, I eat three balanced meals, look both ways before crossing the street, floss, and make sure to wear clean clothes."
"Listen, I'm sorry about what I said," he said miserably, "But right now you look like you've been through hell-"
Amanda shook her head and Warren's eyes softened.
"Look, I'm really sorry about what I said. It was wrong and I shouldn't have assumed-"
"Nothing happened," she said, "I just want to go to sleep, okay?"
Without giving him a chance to answer she walked past him. It was hard enough to deal with her hurt without having to answer stupid questions from him. Sighing again she walked down the corridor to her room. Amanda brushed her hair out and got changed for the night, pulling the covers over her head.
No sooner had she settled down then she heard a knock on the door. Angrily she flung her covers aside and jerked the door open.
"Warren, I told you I wanted to go to sleep!"
The words had burst past her lips before she even realized who her visitor was. Kurt stood staring at her, cringing away slightly. Amanda stared at him, suddenly aware of how her night gown was sleeveless and only went to her knees. She flushed before remembering her old hurt and the fact that it was her doorway he was standing in.
"Thought you were someone else," said Amanda, trying to keep her tone even, "What do you want?"
Kurt flinched, an action she watched with a bitter satisfaction.
"I… entschuldigung," he said, "I…zere ist a time difference betveen Vashington and here and I zhought…"
He licked his lips and looked down.
"I zhought it vas earlier," Kurt said.
"Okay," she said.
There was an awkward pause. Amanda felt her resolve weakening and she sighed.
"You don't have to stand in the hallway," she said, "You can come in you know."
Kurt blinked at her and she rolled her eyes.
"It's not the middle ages. You can come into a girl's room without anyone saying anything," said Amanda, "We both know it's not like that."
She wanted to say that they both knew it wouldn't ever be like that, but the words stuck in her throat. He'd obviously come to apologize and ask if they could still be friends. That would be alright. It wasn't what she wanted, and deep down she suspected it wasn't what he wanted either. However, if that was all he was going to let happen then she'd have to settle for it. For now anyway.
"I am sorry for ze vay zat I acted a few dayz ago," he said.
Just as she'd expected. Her lips started to form the appropriate words.
"It's okay it's…"
Her voice trailed off. Why should she have to lie? Why should she have to play the silly little heroine from the book who just accepted her lot?
"…no, you know what? It's not okay," Amanda said, putting her hand on her forehead and closing her eyes, "I don't know what it was to you then but you have to understand…I thought we… I thought you felt something for me too. That's all."
There was a silence and Amanda felt tears build in her eyes. She wasn't crying in front of him though. She felt ridiculous enough as it was.
"I do."
Her eyes opened.
"What?" she asked.
Kurt sighed miserably, his hand brushing against his rosary.
"I do feel for you," he confessed.
Amanda stared at him.
"Then why…why did you-?" she sputtered.
"Vhat…vhat I look like ist not, vell, normal," he said.
A thousand emotions rattled inside of her head and she struggled to answer.
"That doesn't matter to me," she said, "I thought you knew that."
"It matters to ozzer people," he said glumly.
"Who cares?" she demanded, "Who cares what they do or don't think?"
"It can be dangerous for people who…vith vhat I look like, how my life vas before I came here," Kurt said quietly, "I didn't vant you to get hurt."
She shook her head.
"You didn't want me to get hurt?" asked Amanda incredulously, "Kurt, I did get hurt. I got hurt like hell. So don't give me that excuse."
He winced and she wondered if she'd been too harsh. Still, it was too late now. Amanda threw her hands into the air.
"Why are you telling me this now?" asked Amanda, "Are you just trying to explain why you don't want to be around me?"
"Nein," Kurt said quickly, "I vas in Vashington and I met zis couple zat…vell, not met, but zey vere on ze news…"
"Wait, are you talking about Secretary McCoy and Caroline?" she asked.
He nodded.
"I saw zem," said Kurt, "and I started to qvestion myself…I had been qvestioning myself since zat night. But I vanted…"
Kurt took a deep breath and stopped. Amanda closed the distance between them and looked into his eyes. His golden eyes met hers and she swallowed.
"Kurt…you have to understand," she said, "I…I think I love you."
"You…you mean zat?" he asked, his eyes wide.
"Do you think I would just say it if I didn't feel it?" laughed Amanda weakly.
A tentative smile crossed his lips.
"I know what I'm feeling," Amanda said, "I don't just say that to people. I've never… I've never said that to a boy before."
She breathed in.
"Let me make this decision for myself," Amanda said, "Let me…let me decide what to risk. Because I've already decided that I want you. I'm not…I'm trying not to ask anything of you. I just want to know… what is it you want? Do you…what I feel, is it the same for you?"
The terrible silence descended again, pressing down on them. She waited, her gut clenching. His hands delicately cupped her face.
"Mein Gott…erstaunliche," he murmured to himself, "Danke, vielen dank."
She didn't know what that meant and wished that she did.
"Ja Amanda, ja," said Kurt.
Unlike its predecessors she knew what those words meant. Her head shot up in time to be caught in a kiss. Amanda's eyes closed and pushed herself closer. His sandpaper skin caught on hers and she felt that same electricity. As she pressed closer she could faintly feel the pressure of his fangs against her skin. Beneath her lips his moved tentatively against hers.
All too soon his lips separated from hers only to kiss the tear trails that, unbidden, wound down her face. His hands rested on her back and she couldn't help but feel the warmth that emanated from his skin. She rested her hands on his shoulders, clutching them tightly. Beneath her thumb she felt something strange.
Amanda frowned and slipped a hand under his shirt. Her fingers curiously traced the rough patch there. There were designs there like the ones on his face, she could feel that, but this was something else. A few moments passed before she realized that Kurt had frozen and his breathing had become uneven. Color rushed to her face and she pulled away, looking down in embarrassment.
One of his hands tilted her head back up so that his golden eyes bored into hers.
"Kurt, what, what was that?" she asked after a moment.
"Tattoos," he replied, still sounding slightly breathless, "Vone for efery sin. So quite a few engel."
His words seemed to be meant as a joke, but they sounded a little nervous. Amanda touched his chest.
"I don't think so," she said.
"Amanda…"
"Did something happen?"
"Nein," he said uncomfortably, "It's nozing."
"Can I see?"
Her words shocked Kurt and they shocked her as well. She put a hand to her mouth.
"I…"
Kurt ducked his face and she wondered if he was embarrassed about his markings. In the end he undid the buttons of his shirt. She gulped and felt her face burn again. What she'd asked might not have been such a good idea, but it was too late to turn back now. He let the shirt fall to the ground and she saw the markings for herself.
The swirls and whorls on his skin were similar to the ones on his face, only these were more detailed and poignant. Her hand reached out tentatively and traced one of them. She felt him shudder under her touch. Amanda was tempted to pull away, but she didn't. Another one of her hands traced a scar at his shoulder, what she had felt beneath his shirt.
The skin had healed in blotchy, thick patches. At one point she could imagine that the wound had been infected. There were smaller scratches too, almost like he'd tried to claw at whatever had happened to his shoulder.
"This isn't a tattoo," she said.
"Nein," said Kurt, shame crossing his face, "It vas a vound from…zere vas an incident…I…I meant it vhen I said my life had not been peaceful..."
He seemed increasingly uncomfortable and she realized she shouldn't have asked. Amanda saved him from having to answer with a quick kiss to his lips. Her arms wrapped around his shoulders. As she did so she felt something at the back of his neck. After seeing his reaction to the scar at his shoulder she decided not to ask. Later there would be time.
His lips parted slightly and she deepened the kiss, causing him to step back in surprise. He stumbled, tripping over the edge of her bed and falling into it. Amanda stumbled too but his tail shot out and caught her, wrapping itself around her waist. However, it jerked her a little too hard and brought her flush against him.
She blinked back in surprise and, from the look on Kurt's face, he hadn't expected it either. Kurt buried his face in one of his hands.
"Ach...ich kann nicht glauben dies..." Kurt mumbled.
"I'm sorry," she said, adjusting to the strange sensation of his tail around her waist.
"Zere is nozing for you to be sorry about engel," Kurt said, "It vas not your tail zat…zat…"
She glanced over at him. He looked thoroughly scandalized. Suddenly she burst into laughter. Kurt stared at her.
"I'm sorry," she said, "but this is just so…the look on your face… you know?"
"I do not."
She gave him an adoring look before twining her fingers in his dark hair.
"Maybe later you will," Amanda said, "But I'm in no hurry."
He cupped her face and kissed her gently on the forehead. Amanda breathed out and pulled the blankets over the two of them, guarding them against the coming chill of the night.
"I haf never been so close to anyvone before," he whispered.
"Me neither," she admitted.
One of Kurt's hands absently played with the strands of her hair that had spilled out around her.
"Du bist schön meine engel," he murmured.
Her head cocked to the side.
"What's that mean?" she asked.
"Learn German miene engel," he said playfully.
Rolling her eyes Amanda said;
"Well how about the last word? I heard it earlier…are you calling me angel?"
Kurt blushed slightly.
"Ja."
"Little early for pet names," she said, resting her head on his chest, "But you know what? I don't mind. Not at all. I'll have to find something to call you though."
His arms wrapped around her and he buried his head in her hair. She giggled as she began to drift off. In the morning, she knew, everything wouldn't be quite so perfect. Their being together would open up a host of problems; her stay there was only temporary after all and there was so much to consider. For now though it was just the two of them.