Bella had awoken the day after Ellie's last scheme had borne such bitter fruit to the quiet moments of predawn.
Her conscious mind was a winding blur of thoughts and emotions, spinning through her grasp at the speed of light. Just like in her dreams where memory and feeling were tangible and silvery, cold things that slipped away even as she chased after them. Chased them through ghostly trees and mists that her eyes could never hope to penetrate.
Leaving her barren and forlorn. Lost. Until warmth and comfort edged into the peripheries of her awareness as she wandered through the fog. Peace wrapped around her and Bella clung to it tightly, wrapped herself around it in return. Arms wound around it as securely as she could manage, legs locked around it just as tightly, she found herself being turned and for a moment, she had panicked, because she thought she felt her peace shifting away from her. But then it twisted under her desperately grasping hands and moved closer until she was able to completely wrap herself around it.
It wasn't like the glimmering wisps that escaped her no matter how close she came to catching them. This was heat and strength and solidity that didn't leave her when she needed it. Didn't abandon her like others she refused to mention here in this dream world for fear of their reappearance. She could never understand the lure of the wisps, but it never stopped her from trying her utmost to keep up with them. She could hardly breathe here in the miasma, as if it were bearing down on her body and weighing her down.
But the presence didn't withdraw from her and finally she felt safe enough to wrap her own arms about her chest. Trying to block the soul-sucking wound the wisps inflicted that had suddenly reappeared after so long an absence. The wound was cold and fought against the heat of her peace, but it was no match for it. It slowly shrank, warming gradually until it was nothing more than a faint frigid presence.
It was the soft rumble of a familiar male voice that finally dragged her out of her nightmarish dreamscape.
Her eyes snapped open even as she gasped, deep and desperate like a diver just breaking the surface.
"Hey, now. There you are," Paul murmured quietly. The familiar rasp of it drew her attention and she flung herself at him, clinging with all shaky her might to the Were as if he could save her from her own stupid imagination. He carefully shifted them so that he was leaning against the headboard, Bella cradled against his chest as she lay across his lap. His hands smoothed down her back, over her hip and down her thigh to her knee in a repetitive caress that gradually soothed the trembling.
Warmth followed in its wake, chasing away the chills and lingering dread. Slowly, Bella's breathing finally came under control and she heaved a slow sigh as she tucked her head under the Were's chin.
"Nightmare?" Paul's eyes shimmered faintly in the shadows. It wasn't so much a question as it was a prompting to speak.
"I hate that stupid fucking dream." She also loathed the tight, breathy edge of fear in her voice. Even more that she'd had that damned dream again after months of thinking she was free of it. Paul's near break with humanity must have stressed her out much more than she had realized, but she wouldn't have traded his presence for anything right then, because no one else had ever been able to bring her out of that damned repetitive nightmare with such ease before. Not even Sam, who had dragged her into a painfully cold shower to shock her into wakefulness.
"Need to talk about it?"
Bella shrugged, eyes downcast as a touch of shame wound its way through her. "Not much to tell. It's the same dream I used to have for the first few months after I met Sam. I run through the woods chasing things I can't ever catch, all the while wondering where the hell I am and why the hell I'm trying to chase them in the first place. And I feel so empty, like what I'm chasing is slowly hollowing me out…killing me."
Paul tightened his grip on her, cheek pressed against the top of her head. "Sounds suicidal."
She was quiet for a few moments, mulling the insight over. She'd never thought about it from that angle before. And she supposed that it actually did sound that way, chasing things that were slowly killing her. But she supposed that theory might explain Sam's insistence on keeping her so close those first few months. It would also explain Embry's need to be in constant contact after she'd finally confessed to feeling so…hollow. "Maybe I was," she finally admitted. She had hurt so much in those first couple of weeks before Sam had come back to her. Charlie had been at a loss as to how to help her. And she had just wanted to disappear into the pain and cease to exist.
But then had come Sam. And Embry. And Jacob. The Pack. They had dragged her out of the place from where Edward had shredded and buried her very soul in the frozen ground.
She tilted her head back to look him in the eyes, wanting to make certain that he saw the truth in her own. "But not anymore."
Paul cocked his head. "What changed?"
"Everything. I lost an entire way of life in one night. Had my heart ripped open and danced upon. I wasn't really living while I was around the Cullens…simply passing time till I could convince Edward to change me."
She could feel the low growl that vibrated in his chest and didn't blame him in the slightest. His kind were made to hunt and kill what she had so desperately wanted to become. She couldn't imagine how it might have felt to be run down and hunted by the very Pack that she adored. That she would have been ripped apart by Paul. The very thought made her sick, because she would have given away her human life for some stupid asshole who would never truly grow up and never, ever deserve her.
Edward had been right in that respect. He wasn't worth dying for.
"You know I hated you for that?" His voice was low, almost bitter as if disliking the very taste of the words in his own mouth. She could feel the tension rippling through his entire body.
Bella turned in his arms, sitting up to face him properly. Her expression was sad as she stroked her fingers across the tendons flexing across his forearm. "I know. Sam told me," she finally said quietly. She'd been horribly hurt by it at first, because she'd barely known him at that point. But looking back, she had already been far too drawn to him to let go of the chance he had so generously given her, despite his feelings to the contrary. She had even understood why he might feel that way. He didn't know her from anything other than stories and Pack-memory and from the outside, she supposed she had looked like a brainless little twit trying to stick her head in the lion's mouth while daring it not to bite her. "I don't even blame you for hating me. I hated me, too, for the longest time."
His brows lowered, pale eyes narrowing on her face. "Your depression?"
She reached up and brushed back the stray locks of hair that had dipped into his gaze, smiling gently as he nuzzled into her hand. "Yeah. I know now that it probably had a lot to do with the lingering effects of the Vampire's natural allure. Their scents are…addictive from what I understand. So it would have been like detoxing off a drug-addiction and going cold turkey. And I was hurt that people who claimed to love me like I was one of their own, just dropped me like I was so much trash. And Edward…Edward told me that he was…that I was-"
She was silenced by the gentle press of his lips to her cheek, a soft, barely-there brush that was simple affection and comfort. "Whatever he said to you, he was full of shit."
Bella smiled again, because it was kind of nice that he had taken her side without a recap of what Edward had said to her. It still kind of hurt, even if most of it wasn't true. Just because she was human didn't make her mind a sieve. He wasn't all so perfect himself, despite what she had thought at the time. Time had given her perspective, along with the way her Pack treated her. Because if Leah and Paul of all people could like her, then she wasn't as disposable as the Vampire had stated. Bella also suspected that he had cut her off because hearing what the self-righteous little prick had actually said to her just might piss him right the fuck off and that was the last thing that either of them needed right now.
"You know, it wasn't all bad. There were times with the family that I will miss." She knew she was taking a chance even hinting that she missed the Cullens, but she couldn't do them the disservice of lying about her affection for them. She still missed most of them…even the beautiful but cool Rosalie. Edward, on the other hand, she could do without. Preferably for the rest of her life.
"And that redheaded bitch that's following you? How does she play into the scenario?"
"Sam didn't tell you?"
"Never asked before."
"We were out playing a game of baseball. Yeah, I know," she chuckled to herself at the look of disbelief that crossed his face. "Vampires playing ball, who would have thought, right? Anyway we were playing when a trio of nomads came upon us. James, their coven leader, decided that I would make good hunting after Edward betrayed his emotions to them. If he had just kept his cool and claimed I was a pet instead of something more, we might have been fine." She frowned, replaying Edward's naïve actions that had changed so much in her life. She'd been broken, then painstakingly repaired. She'd nearly lost Charlie due to her own need to protect him. She had a scar on her wrist that she pretended didn't exist because it reminded her far too much that she'd almost willingly thrown her own life away.
"Anyway," she continued. "Emmett and Jasper took care of him. Burned him into ashes. I think Jasper even danced in them. Later, Embry ripped off Laurent's head…leaving James' mate to hunt me on her own. From what I can understand, mating bonds in vampires are every bit as strong as an Imprinting is for a Wolf. At least I think it might be, you'd have to ask Jasper if you wanted to know for sure."
"He was the empathic Vamp?"
"Yeah. Jasper Hale. Quiet but intense and always in the background. Edward always kept him away from me. Said he was having trouble acclimating to the animal diet, but I really don't know if I believe it anymore. Jasper was fond of making me laugh, even from across the room. He later said that…I was worth it. Worth all the trouble they got into over me."
"Sounds like he and I might actually have gotten along. You are worth it."
Bella grinned. That was the first time that any Wolf had actually admitted to such a thing and it was precious to her because of her abiding love for the family, despite their abandonment. She refused to think of how teary his following statement made her, because she didn't want to turn into a puddle of Bella-mush right now. "I think you might have," she continued, surreptitiously wiping away the moisture that threatened to escape her eyes as she glanced out the window.
But he wasn't to be dissuaded, apparently, because he hooked a finger under her chin and turned her back to face him. She widened her eyes to try and force away the wateriness and was dismayed when a drop escaped that he swiped away with his thumb. "Look at me," he insisted quietly, waiting till she had looked at him to continue. "You are worth it. Worth the time and effort it takes to keep you safe. Yeah, you have funny taste in friends, me included. Your chosen family is composed of a pack of Werewolves that you love without reservation and ask for nothing in return, so don't you dare think you aren't worth their love. You are all the family some of them currently have. You were easily worth the effort of getting to know you, which I couldn't have done if you were killed off by the undead ginger. You are worth caring for. You are worth all of it, girl," he rumbled in a voice like distant thunder as he drove home his point.
For someone who wasn't much of a talker, he sure did a damned good job of knowing which words needed to be heard. Bella sniffled a bit, but nodded in answer because she felt a little too stripped bare emotionally to come up with any kind of verbal response.
Then she was saved from the seriousness of the moment by a quiet knock at the door.
"Bella?" The quiet, muffled voice of her Aunt Stacey filtered through the door. "Are you up, honey?"
Lifting her brows in surprise, Bella hastily wiped away the remainder of her tears, then got up to answer the door. Poking her head out, she was greeted by the sight of not only her aunt but Uncle John as well. Seeing the intent look on the former's face, Bella stepped through the door, and had intended to close it, but her uncle stopped her. "This pertains to your friend, too, if he's awake?"
Bella felt more than heard Paul approach them, one heavy arm coming down to wrap across the front of her shoulders. "What's up," Bella asked a bit hesitantly. If they were going to have second thoughts about Ellie's accusation, she didn't know what she was going to do. The family had been expected to stay for the rest of the day and things would already be awkward as it was with Ellie about. Ellie tended to get away with everything and lying was just the tip of the iceberg, but-
"We just wanted to talk to you before we left. We…well…I don't even know where to really begin," Stacey said hesitantly. She twisted her hands together, much like Bella did when nervous or just plain agitated.
John laid a comforting hand against his wife's back. "What we meant to say is that we cannot express to you just how sorry we are for what Ellie did last night. To both of you. I know that she's always felt competitive with you, Bella, though you've given her no reason to feel that way. But that didn't give her any right to invade your space and…well, what she attempted was not something I ever thought she was capable of," he ended a bit awkwardly.
Bella reached back and fisted her hands into the denim covering Paul's thighs, unsure of what exactly she should be saying.
"Oh, honey," Stacey said, apparently reading her expression like a book. "There is nothing you need to say. This is not your fault, either of you! Especially you, Paul. I don't even know where to begin in both apologizing and, well, thanking you to be honest."
Paul was watching the older couple silently, a thoughtful expression on his face. And Stacey realized that this was the very first time she had actually seen the young man without his sunglasses. His eyes were a peculiar shade of icy blue, pale and just a bit chilling.
Mentally shaking her head at her own whimsy, Stacey continued. "I know there is nothing I can say to excuse what Ellie did last night, or what she accused you of. I just wanted you to know that we both understood the gravity of it and are taking steps to make certain that she understands it as well. And…that we are actually grateful for the way you handled it, Paul. Maybe the embarrassment will teach her a much needed lesson."
"I know we had planned to stay till after dinner, but we feel that we should go ahead and start driving home. Ellie's punishment is already underway and will be easier to enforce away from the rest of the family."
Bella honestly felt bad for the couple, even though she knew that Ellie had been coddled for far too long. It could have gone so much worse than it had…
Inwardly shuddering and thanking God for Paul's restraint and supernatural senses, Bella stepped away from Paul and gently hugged her miserable looking aunt and uncle. They both seemed relieved that she wasn't going to spurn them for what Ellie had done, thanking her again, John reaching out to shake Paul's hand, which Paul allowed. Then the couple turned and went back down the hall and down the stairs where Ellie was apparently waiting, already packed and ready to go.
Bella turned back to Paul as he led the way into the bedroom. His lips were tipped up in wry amusement as he stepped towards his bag, and Bella wondered at his expression as he went about pulling out clothing for the day. His movements were as smooth and graceful as ever as he bundled everything together and moved towards the shower, so he wasn't angry. It was as he was opening the door that Bella finally hazarded a guess. "You don't think they got it, do you?" she surmised.
He paused, hand on the knob as he turned to face her. "I think that they have a long way to go before they truly understand just how messed up their kid really is."
Bella quietly sighed, digesting this new bit of wisdom. Paul tended to have insight into the oddest places, and he was invariably right when he bothered to share. "You think they're up for it?" she hesitantly asked.
He shrugged. "Don't know them well enough. But instinct says they aren't ready for the fight they're about to have on their hands. That girl is headstrong and seriously fucked up to be thinking she could get away with what she tried. I could have been the asshole who went along with it. Never mind what she claimed happened."
Yeah…it had been pretty fucked up, to be honest. Because if Paul had been the kind of creeper to have gone along with it, then what did that say about the type of man that Ellie was attracted to?
Bella scowled at the thought, because even as angry as she was with Ellie, she knew it took more than overly indulgent parents to have gotten the girl to where she currently stood. She distantly registered the sound of the door shutting as Paul went into the bathroom to go take his morning shower, far too focused on the current issue. She kind of wanted to discuss it with her mother, actually, because upon further thought, the whole thing reeked of problems she hoped had never occurred. The kind that involved full grown men taking advantage of a young girl who thought only of how cute that man might be and not of how illegal their age difference might make the whole situation.
…or maybe she was just buying trouble, Bella finally thought with a wince. After all, she had no proof of any wrongdoing and no name to attach it to even if she had said proof. Shaking her head, she went to her own bag and pulled out clothing for the day, unknowingly mirroring her roommate as she pulled out a pair of well-worn jeans and a dark grey v-necked t-shirt. She pondered a bit longer before resolving to speak to her mother about her fears later, quietly where there was no one to hear and accidentally start the spread of rumors.
Paul emerged seconds later, hair wet as he wrapped the towel around his head and vigorously set to drying it. Bella smiled as she wandered over with the brush. "Looks like I need to trim you again," she murmured as she pulled out the chair from the desk, waiting till he had wandered over to sit at her feet. She ran her fingers through his damp hair, feeling more like cool wet satin than anything else as he rumbled a quiet purr.
"It can go a few more days," he returned. Bella tended to like keeping him neatly trimmed, running the clippers over him every ten to twelve days or so. His hair just seemed to grow so fast, anything less would leave him looking a bit shaggy in her opinion. When asked, he'd shrugged and told her it had always been that way. It was why he tended to wear it long, because such swift growth could easily be dismissed when it was all so long. Bella had winced, then apologized for giving him a haircut that needed so much maintenance, but he'd just shrugged and said he didn't mind. She'd maintained it for him ever since, deciding it was a small price to pay to get her hands on his hair, because she loved playing with it.
Patting his back, she scooted her chair backwards and stood with a stretch and a good yawn before scooping up her clothes and stepping away and towards the shower. Rushing through it, she was relieved to find that it woke her up a bit, something she had needed after her abbreviated slumber the night before. She just hoped that that had been the end of that particular nightmare again for a while. It always made her feel so pathetic afterwards, because even she could see the symbolism behind the damned thing. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure things out.
Bella was dressed and running the brush through her hair when she realized that it was now longer that it should have been yet again. She'd completely spaced out on asking Emily about the unnatural growth and resolved to make a note to remind herself again, because apparently just trying to make a mental note wasn't quite good enough. In fact, it was just long enough to French braid it. Unfortunately, her fingers were clumsy from being out of practice these last few months and she was just cursing and restarting when Paul gently brushed her fingers away. "Let me try," he said quietly.
Bella blinked, but shrugged and let him. After all, what possible harm could it do? He brushed through it a few times as if getting a feel for the fine, slick texture of her thick wet hair, before he tilted her head forward and sectioned off a bit. She almost thought to try and give him instructions, but bit her tongue and just let him do as he liked. But of course, as unfairness would have it, it didn't take him long to work out what to do and then his long fingers were easing through her hair and weaving it at a phenomenal rate of speed. Not much later, he was reaching for the band that Bella handed him over her shoulder
She crossed over to the mirror and glanced at the finished work, braided neat and smooth against her head. Turning to look at his reflection, she lifted a brow. "Okay. How did you possibly…?"
His lips curved upwards minutely. "Pack memory."
That…actually made a bit of sense. "Leah?"
"And Jared. And surprisingly, Quil."
Bella snorted in amusement. "Let me guess. He thought it would be a great way to get to know girls?"
"Well, he put in the time. Now, he's the only other male Emily will let touch her hair besides Sam because of his steady hand with a pair of scissors."
"He where you learned to cut it?"
"Nah. That was Kell. He bartends at The Haven and moonlights as a hair dresser occasionally. Used to cut my hair and babbles like a teenage girl when the mood strikes him. Said you did a good job, by the way," Paul said with a slow wink that made Bella blush with two parts pride and one part shameful thrill.
He was so pretty when he was artlessly flirting, making it all the harder to ignore it when he did so, because she knew better than to take it seriously. He didn't mean anything by it, and she would do well to remember that. Didn't mean it didn't give her shivers when he did it, however, because even being in the same room with him could make her heart pound. It was like being on a roller coaster and coming up to that very first and most terrifying drop, the one just before the world disappeared out from under you leaving you screaming out into nothingness.
A part of her still could hardly believe that someone like him wanted to be friends with someone like her.
But it didn't feel anything like in the past with Edward. Paul never went out of his way to make her feel small and helpless. Never used his supernatural perfection to purposefully make her feel plain and unworthy. It wasn't his fault that her ex, the glitter-prick, had done his level best to make her feel like absolute shit, all the while talking a pretty game about how special she was.
It could leave any normal girl with a complex…and it had.
She had felt sub-human for the longest time, like she was somehow less than even the most average girl in looks and personality. She wasn't smart enough to make her own decisions or even to choose what to eat, because Edward had begun to make even those decisions for her towards the end. What to wear…because Edward had been interfering there as well.
She was startled out of her musings by the feel of his fingers dancing down her spine, leaving sparks of sensation in their wake. She realized that the knocking at the door that she had missed while woolgathering was steadily growing louder as if the person at the door were trying to gently wake the occupants.
"Yeah?" she called.
"Bella?" Her mother's voice was quiet as it filtered through the door. "You both up?"
Bella opened the door to show that both of them were up and ready for the day. "What's up?"
"Your grandparents are about to hit the road back to Miami and wanted to see if you were available to come down and see them off."
Bella followed her mother from the room with a smile, Paul stalking along behind her like a silent, graceful shadow.
Down the stairs, Isabell and Henry stood in the entryway, smiling as the trio came into sight. "Bella!" Isabell called up. "We weren't sure you'd be up yet."
"Yeah, I had a funky dream and woke up early. Unfortunately I managed to wake Paul up as well and so we decided to get an early start on the day," Bella glossed over. She refused to even mention just how bad the dream made her feel, because it still made her feel weak and pitiful and that was the last thing she wanted to be sharing with anyone.
It was bad enough that Paul had to witness it.
Pasting a pleasant smile on her face to cover any possible lingering traces of dismay that might have been left over from earlier, Bella hurried forward to hug first her grandmother and then her grandfather in quick succession. "It was wonderful to see you," Bella said as she pressed a kiss to Henry's cheek, smiling a bit more genuinely in response to the expression on the older man's face. "Both of you!"
"Hopefully it won't be so long, next time," Henry murmured, taking in the beautiful face of his favorite granddaughter. He was glad that his wife and daughter had helped to pry his head out of his backside in regards to the young man seemingly content to stay in the background.
After witnessing how he had handled Ellie's attempts to get into his pants, Henry had had to further revise his opinion on Bella's Paul. He might not have wished the younger girl to be publicly embarrassed the way she had been, but the very fact that Paul so obviously hadn't even been tempted…he'd been close enough to overhear what the young man had said to the girl…had done a lot towards making him actually believe that Bella's friend might actually be on the up and up.
The only thing he still couldn't explain was the strange aura of impending danger that had surrounded the young man as he'd stepped from the room. It was like an unnatural chill that followed in his wake, and Henry had actually shivered as it danced across his skin. He'd almost gotten up to follow, because Paul had obviously been on edge. But Renée had placed a hand on his arm with a shake of her head, and Henry had heeded her. He'd remained uneasy until the distinct lack of shouting had reached him…he hadn't taken out his frustrations with Bella, despite the tension that had coiled in his massive form. He had realized, then, that Ellie had likely gotten off easy compared to others who might have intruded past the young man's barriers. Because Renée had finally pulled him aside and explained the strange hands-off nature that even Henry had noticed.
It was a given that Henry felt badly for the Paul. It had bought greater a measure of understanding from the older man, and a great deal of respect because it hadn't been Ellie herself that Paul had lashed out at, simply her pride that had been torn to shreds. That respect had him hesitate for a moment, but in the end he offered his hand, this time honestly, and was pleased when the taller man reached forward and gave him the same courtesy in return. A polite bow of his head was offered to Isabell and returned with a smile.
Isabell genuinely liked the tall, handsome young man. She hadn't thought she would due to circumstances, but he had quietly and subtly charmed his way past her defenses. She hadn't even taken issue with how he had dealt with her granddaughter because he had quite possibly taught her a valuable life lesson. She couldn't have everything she wanted, and things might turn ugly if your greed exceeded your sense.
Ellie had looked thoroughly mortified as she had sat at the breakfast table for a quick bite to eat before her family had departed early that morning. A look that Isabell could never remember ever having taken up residence on the girl's face before, she wouldn't look anyone in the face, especially her father. For his own part, John couldn't look at his own daughter without his own expression turning to shame. He had let her get away with absolute murder for her entire life and had had it forcefully shoved into his face just how far Ellie had fallen. She had only enough shame to feel embarrassed about being naked in front of her family and no more.
But now, is seemed apparent that she was about to learn.
Embracing Bella one last time, the elder couple took their leave with a promise of a call at least once a month.
}:{
The days passed much more quietly after Ellie was gone; even the little ones were more subdued. The parents had all agreed that none of the kids, beyond those directly involved, should be told about what had happened. Gareth had caught the tail end of the show, having been downstairs studying. Paul had been in the kitchen helping Isabell clean up, so he'd had knowledge of where half the players in the little melodrama had been. He'd waved goodnight to Paul as he'd left the room, then gotten up himself to go wish his parents a good night. Then, scant moments after he'd pressed a kiss to his mother's cheek, Paul had come storming back into the living room. He had turned just in time to watch Ellie come tumbling down off Paul's shoulder directly onto her ass.
Her accusation had been an absolute shock, mostly because anyone with eyes could tell the man had zero interest in her. In fact, he'd made it damned easy on the boys in their efforts to keep the two far away from each other. So easy, in fact, that for a while he'd been convinced that Paul'd actually never noticed his little hanger-on. But the 'subtle avoidances' happened far too many times for it to be coincidence. He was simply always where she was not, unless Bella happened to be involved.
That was when Gareth realized that the big man was far more subtle than most of them had realized.
He'd debated on whether or not to share his observation with the others, but in the end decided it was better to keep it to himself. Funnier, too, because watching Ellie pout and carry on was a riot.
Until she'd gone much too far.
Even he had been horrified at the words that had come out of his cousin's mouth. Lie after filthy lie. Granted he was used to hearing lies from the girl…she got away with it because her parents, especially her father, let her get away with everything because she was their only baby. She wasn't very well liked amongst her cousins and bemusedly tolerated by her aunts and uncles. Her grandparents despaired of her and had tried for years to talk sense into John and Stacey who had both insisted that it was just a phase.
But it was never ending.
But he noticed that with her little lying majesty gone home, Bella was a lot more relaxed. Things might have been quieter, but Bella looked as if a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders. She smiled more readily. More honestly. Paul also seemed a bit more genuinely relaxed. The understated tension that Gareth had only just begun to notice dissipated, his smiles less predatory and more pleasant.
He was just beginning to enjoy his stay again when, sadly, it came time to go home. He'd watched as much of the family had slowly dwindled away over the following days. Most of his time this trip had been taken up by studying, but he'd taken breaks here and there to visit with people whenever he felt he could justify it.
And he'd taken a time or two to try and chat with Paul.
It was funny, because for as much space as the man occupied physically, he took up next to none in a conversation. He communicated mostly through facial expressions and the occasional shrug. Words were hard to drag from him and though Gareth had to admit to a feeling of success when he managed to get Paul to respond in complete sentences, it left him more curious about the other man then put off by the silence.
But he was also quick to note the physical standoffishness and respond respectfully. His college major, as it just so happened be, was psychology. His own observations, colored by such a direction of study, had left him with a bit more insight into Paul than most of his fellow family members. And to his sadness, he could see a number of markers that indicated previous abuse. Paul handled himself quite well despite them, however. Never jumping on anyone who accidentally invaded the space he had designated his own. Especially in regards to Matthew.
Paul seemed to have developed a soft spot for the little boy that seemingly surprised even Bella; not that she didn't seem delighted by the outcome. Her eyes had actually lit up when she had walked into the kitchen to see Matthew sitting on the countertop directing while Paul put a pair of sandwiches together for the both of them.
Gareth surmised that Paul's probable abuse at an early age likely insulated Matthew from any reprisal to his touching the tall man. The shy boy and the quiet man had both looked up as Bella had approached, before Matthew had silently offered his own sandwich to the girl. Bella had smiled and shook her head no, declaring she could make her own. Paul had just smirked before turning and pulling down a third plate, starting a sandwich for the girl.
It was the tiny, considerate things like that that told more about Paul than any conversation could.
And it gave Gareth hope for Bella's sake.
}:{
Bella yawned as she leaned into Paul. Rose and Gareth, along with their parents, had just left and while she loved them, she couldn't help but be a bit grateful. She was starting to feel a bit drained.
She missed her quieter life in Forks. Almost two years ago, she would never have believed she would take a life in Forks over a life with her mother, despite the choice she'd made to leave to give Renée more time with her new husband.
At first, she'd been a bit unsettled. Too much rain, too few people, and way too much attention, all focused on her.
It was strange, but getting to know the Cullens had insulated her further from wanting to involve herself in the goings on of her new hometown. She had managed to alienate everyone but Angela, and that was simply because Angela was far more stubborn than the average bear.
She was ashamed to wonder if she would have gotten her head out of her ass if Edward and rest of the Cullens hadn't of jumped ship…
It had only done her good, because her relationship with the Vampires had long since crossed the border into unhealthy territory.
Then had come the Wolves…and Bella had been dragged kicking and screaming into their little family. She'd had to learn what a healthy relationship looked like and to do things for herself again. She'd been encouraged by someone who knew what it felt like to have a far more honest relationship with her father and now, while she loved her mother, she was far closer to Charlie. Though, it could also be that the two were very similar in temperament.
Now, she couldn't imagine wanting any other way of life. Sam was a wonderful brother, as were Embry and Jared. Jacob had been as well, until he had flipped a bitch and lost it. And while she would always love her human family, her father and her Wolf-boys had taken the lion's share of her heart.
Especially Paul.
She didn't know how he'd done it, but he'd become the dearest to her in a short amount of time. She didn't go more than two days without at least talking to him, and it was a two-way street, because if she didn't call him, then he would actually call her. It felt…nice…to know that she wasn't the only one putting forth the effort in their relationship unlike a lot of her previous friendships. In fact, most times, she was the one calling Jacob to check in with him before Paul came along.
"Bella!" Renée called out from the entranceway.
Bella turned and lifted a brow in question.
"We're getting ready to go to the ballpark. You sure you don't want to come with us?"
Phil had been oddly insistent on getting the pair out to the stadium to swing at a few balls. Bella had been in years previous and had done far better than had been expected given her size…she wasn't exactly musclebound. So the target must be Paul.
But the two had discussed it. Paul had gotten away with playing during the water-fight because there everyone had been playing at once and not paying attention to how hard or fast a water-bomb came flying at them when he hit them. They got wet all the same.
In a place where people would be paying attention to such things, indeed were paid to scout for the next big thing, if Paul misjudged even once and hit the ball too hard, it would give away everything. He also couldn't just the damned ball a love tap, because they would all be watching, and an experienced player would know when someone wasn't consistently giving their all in a swing. Besides, no one would believe someone of Paul's general athleticism would be anything less than a power-hitter.
"Think we're gonna take a nap, Mom. But thanks anyway," Bella answered as she and the Were passed her by on their way into the house.
She hated to see Phil's shoulders slump dejectedly, but there was little she could do without giving away secrets that were not her own. Outing the supernatural in such a public way would be a bad idea, and no one with an ounce of intelligence would ever believe that Paul was simply a singular freak of nature. Especially after they got a good look at the people he tended to hang out with, because the shortest of them was a female pushing six-foot-two and all of them looking like the most perfect of fitness models.
"Okay honey," Renée said with a smile. "We should be back by dinnertime and we'll pick up takeout on the way back. Any preferences?"
Bella pondered for a moment, then remembered. "You guys have Whataburger here, don't you?"
"Certainly," Renée returned, laughing at the greedy gleam in her daughter's eyes. "The usual?"
"Yes please! They don't have them in Washington," Bella said with a mock-pout. She turned to Paul. "Any requests?"
He cocked his head. "Double bacon cheese?"
"Five combos?" she asked. "They do yummy fries, too."
"Sounds good," he replied. "Let me go get my wallet."
"Oh, don't worry about it!" Renée hurried to stop him. "We gotcha covered."
Paul lifted a brow as if not certain he should let them.
"Really," Bella said in a stage whisper. "She won't take your money."
He chuckled, shaking his head in reluctant assent.
}:{
Things had been mellow for the rest of the evening, for which Bella had been thankful for. Matthew, along with his brothers and parents had piled into the car after dinner to begin their trip back home. But not before Matt had run up to Paul and wrapped his arms around his legs. The two actually got along and it tickled Bella to death, especially when Paul bent and lifted the little boy to hug him properly. Matt had flushed with pleasure, because it seemed he instinctively knew that he was being afforded a privilege that precious few could ever claim. And being hugged by what he considered to be a real-life superhero could only be pure awesomeness!
Unfortunately, Bella didn't rest well that night. The knowledge that she would be flying out the next morning was stressing her out. She had rolled around for a while, punched her pillow a few times, and then rolled around some more. God, she hated flying! She just couldn't bring herself to trust a flying metal egg no matter how many safety checks it passed. Didn't mean she wouldn't use it, because she didn't fancy driving cross country to get home for the time it would take.
Eventually, Paul had simply wrapped himself around the girl and forced her to lie still. His hands had smoothed down her back in a repetitive stroke that, along with the forced immobility, finally lulled her into a semblance of restfulness that eventually became the real thing, and she dropped off. Luckily no replay of The Nightmare, but she was restless in a way that she hadn't been in her sleep in a long while.
The next day on the way to the airport, Bella fidgeted anxiously in the back of the Suburban as they made their way to JAX. Paul had let her sleep in just enough that she had had to rush getting ready. Though later she would admit that it was a good thing, because it gave her less time to worry about the coming flight. She had run madly out of the house on two wheels just in time to watch Paul tossing their bags into the back of the SUV, hair still damp and wildly curling.
He'd smirked and tugged a curl before climbing into the back seat. Bella had climbed in after him, leaning sideways against his chest after she'd buckled her seatbelt. He'd just chuckled quietly, shifting slightly to make her more comfortable. The ride didn't take all that long.
Then Bella was hugging people goodbye and she and Paul were striding into the airport. Bags were checked. Gates were found. And then Bella was sitting in a tiny airplane seat next to Paul, whose knees were smashed into the back of the window seat in front of him. He just shrugged and said at least it wasn't the aisle seat, because already the flight attendant had tried to shove her tits in Paul's direction resulting in Bella's face-full of boob whenever the woman walked by. The redhead had faked bashfulness, but the lack of a blush had given her away, as had the sly tilt of her eyes.
At first, Bella had been willing to let it go because she knew damned well just how pretty Paul was. Paul seemed oblivious and as the woman couldn't really reach him to touch him without being too obvious, Bella actually thought that she would give up. But she couldn't have been more wrong as the woman knelt on the seat next to Bella and reached to lower the shade by Paul's head on the excuse that Paul's eyes must be sensitive because he was still wearing sunglasses.
An 'oopsie' later and she'd brushed her fingers down the side of his face with an obnoxious giggle. Then Paul's hand had snapped out and shackled the woman's wrist. His lips had curled pleasantly, his voice equally so if one ignored the velvet menace lurking just under the surface. "Don't touch me."
Finally the woman blushed. She had sputtered an apology before backing away as Paul released her, her eyes wide. Her gaze had landed on Bella, who simply shrugged with a bland smile. She wasn't about to help the stupid woman. Thankfully, for the rest of the flight, it was the male flight attendants who served them. The guys actually seemed amused over the whole thing and Bella had to wonder just how many times the woman must have joined the Mile High Club with her passengers to garner that degree of a lack of sympathy in her co-workers.
Not too much later, Bella actually found herself relaxed enough on a flight that she was able to sleep. It was a first for her, and she couldn't have been more grateful for Paul's presence.
Disembarking, she was happy to see that her father had used his badge to get himself and Sam past security and ran to hug the both of them as soon as she could reasonably wiggle her way past the other passengers.
Sam laughed as he suddenly had an armful of little brunette, hugging her tightly before passing her off to her father. "Missed you, kid," Charlie said gruffly.
"Missed you too, Dad," Bella responded with a huge grin. Oh, had she ever missed him! She loved her mom and Phil, but somehow, Charlie had come to mean home to her. Him and her Wolves. Angela. Sue. Harry and Billy. It just wasn't the same without them.
Charlie put his little girl back on her feet before shouldering her bag. "We should get going," he said. "Gotta go get your other bags."
"So, how'd the trip go," Sam asked as they began slowly meandering their way towards the luggage claim. A part of him had been shocked that there had been no midnight calls of utter freaked-outedness. No 'oh, shit, Sam! Paul broke someone!'. After Paul had gotten on the plane, Sam's mind had whirled with all the ways things could possibly go wrong. But Bella had needed Paul, and so Paul she would get. Sam's little sister would have what she needed to keep her healthy. Even if it made Sam utterly freak out, himself, as the days passed with no contact.
Was Paul in jail? Had he killed someone? Had he accidentally outed them because Paul was, quite frankly, the strangest of them? Emily had tried to calm him, and when that didn't work, Jared had pulled him aside and pointed out that there was very little Paul wouldn't actually do for Bella and that most likely included playing nice with her family.
Oddly enough…that had worked.
Bella, for her own part, rolled the question over in her mind. On the one hand she couldn't lie outright because Sam would see through it in a hot minute. She also didn't want to tell him about what had happened with Casey and Ellie, because she didn't ever want to give the rest of the Wolves the satisfaction of knowing how close he'd come to meltdown. Not that, she suspected, Jared of all the Wolves wouldn't have understood. He wasn't super close to Paul but he was closer than the rest and he had lost his shit when his own brother had mouthed off about Kim. He had tossed the same kid under the proverbial bus later on when the boy had hurt Bella.
"It was good. My grandma liked Paul, actually. So did Phil and Renée. And Matthew idolized him," she said with a playful smirk tossed in Paul's direction. He just smirked right back, completely unabashed.
"Matthew?" Sam's face scrunched in confusion.
"A younger cousin. He thought Paul might have been Superman. It was absolutely adorable," Bella concluded just as Charlie chuckled. Charlie missed having a larger family, but hadn't felt right about intruding after the divorce. He was still Uncle Charlie to Gareth and Rose thankfully, but didn't really know the others except through word of mouth as they hadn't been born until after he and Renée had finally filed.
"How old," Sam said somewhat dubiously, because it would take a lot of balls for a kid to even come up to Paul.
"Seven," Bella answered with a touch of defiance. She knew exactly what Sam had been thinking, and while she loved her oldest brother to death, she really did wish that people would stop treating Paul like a rabid animal that was likely to bite someone's arm off. He had behaved perfectly even in the face of other people's issues. Casey was still in one functional piece…so was Ellie, despite her attempts at sexual harassment.
The flight attendant? She still had both her hands.
Sam must have sensed that he was treading into dangerous territory, because he just smiled and dropped it.
He knew how protective Bella was of the taller Wolf, even if it tended to surprise him on occasion. While Paul could certainly take up for himself, he didn't tend to inspire feelings of loyalty in others. Shaking his head, he decided to let the subject go. Bella wasn't going to give up anything that might hurt Paul and it wasn't worth beating a dead horse for information he most likely wouldn't like or need in the first place.
Finally, their bags came down the chute onto the conveyer belt and were picked up by the foursome. Bella hugged Sam one last time, before turning to Paul. Dropping her duffle bag, she threw herself upwards into his arms. "Thank you so much for coming to Florida for me. It meant a great deal," she said quietly.
Paul pressed a kiss to the top of her head and squeezed her a bit tighter before placing her back on her feet. "All you ever have to do is ask," he murmured.
And he meant that. She could see it in the expression on his face. In the lines of his body. She smiled before reaching down and picking up her bag again. A part of her didn't want to leave him, even though she knew he had a shift at The Haven tonight and had to go home and change for it.
She'd just grown so used to having him there every night that she could hardly bear to imagine trying to sleep by herself again. She knew she was being very selfish, so she tried to just smile at him as the two parties went their separate ways. Paul had to stop by Sam's place first to pick up his bike from where they had stored it in the garage. But before they were completely out of earshot, Sam called to get Bella's attention.
"Yeah?"
"Jared and Embry will be by later after they get off work," he said, 'work' being a euphemism for patrolling.
Bella grinned. "Looking forward to it!" she called back before waving at him as the two Wolves walked out the other door.
}:{
"So how did it really go," Charlie asked as he pulled on to the highway.
Bella's eyes widened. She'd thought for sure she was going to get away with everything, because Sam had let it go. But she should have known better. Her dad may not say much but it didn't mean he missed a thing. She sighed, then grudgingly began. "Could have gone better, but none of it was Paul's doing. You can blame all of it on Casey and Ellie."
"I know who Ellie is, but who is Casey? Another cousin?"
"No, one of Phil's old teammates. Phil got promoted to the majors, but he's still friends with his old team. Anyway, Casey…got some sort of weird crush on me and decided to try and get between me and Paul. Not sure what he thought was going on between us, because nothing more than friendship has ever happened. But in the end, he decided that trying to force his tongue down my throat would make me all compliant and crap."
Charlie sputtered for a moment. "Wait…he what?"
"Don't worry. Trying was as far as he got because Paul embarrassed him. Didn't see much of him other than to make cow eyes at me after that until he left the day after Christmas Day."
Charlie unruffled a bit at that, but no dad likes to hear about their daughter being accosted. "And Ellie?"
Bella bit her lip, unsure as to how much she wanted to say. But Charlie, glancing at her out of the corner of his eye, wasn't having it. "All of it, Bells."
"Ellie got a crush on him. It wasn't too bad at first, and Paul basically ignored the fact that she was breathing the same air as he was. That is, until she decided to strip down, climb into my bed and wait for him. Of course he immediately knew it wasn't me, and he took her downstairs still wrapped in the bedclothes and dumped her on the floor in front of everyone. Unfortunately, that was when she decided to try and get out of trouble by lying and saying that Paul had ripped her clothes off and tried to assault her first."
Charlie blinked. "What the hell? Even I know that Paul doesn't like anyone but you. What did she hope to accomplish?"
Bella shrugged. "I'm not really sure she thought that far, to be honest. I know she hoped that he'd cuddle up to her thinking she was me, but he smelled her out even before he could tell that her heartbeat was wrong." She didn't say how touched she was that Paul could tell who she was simply by the beat of her heart.
"Jesus…that's messed up. If anyone had actually believed the little liar then life would have been hell for the kid right about now," Charlie mused. Paul may have been a world-class asshole, but he had proven himself more than loyal to his little girl and that loyalty bought him a measure of the same from Charlie Swan. Even he had heard about what had happened between Paul and Jonah and while a part of him had cringed, the father in him could only cheer Paul on for his heartfelt defense of Bella.
"So," Bella began in an attempt to change the subject. "How were things while I was gone? Anything happen?"
"Not a lot. Sam came over to visit a few times and brought along Emily. That woman makes a mean chocolate cake!"
Bella chuckled. "Yeah, she does. Whenever I have a bad week, she makes it for me."
"Deputy Masterson came in with his wife the other day. Brought in his son to say 'hi'."
"Are there any new pictures?" Bella asked eagerly. That kid was a cute little cherub with a ready smile and the most adorable baby babble.
Charlie reached into his pocket and plucked out his phone to pass it over.
"Oh my god, this is such a cute little guy!" Bella cooed. She wasn't even really a 'baby-person', but the little boy was just too endearing for words. Friendly and happy with very little crying, the baby was the type to inspire the pictures of little winged Cupids. "Aww…!"
Charlie chuckled. "I'll tell Mark you said so."
Scrolling through further, Bella came upon a picture of a very attractive blonde woman in uniform. Looking to be in her early thirties, she was holding the baby and making the exaggerated happy face one tended to make in the face of such overwhelming cuteness. "Who is this?"
Charlie glanced over, and Bella knew immediately that it was someone important by the way Charlie's ears turned red. "That's Deputy Samantha Briggs," he said quietly. "She's new."
Bella's eyes gleamed with mischief. "Really?" she purred. "Tell me all about her!"
The redness in Charlie's ears migrated across his face. "Just transferred in. Don't know her real well, yet, but…she's something else."
"And?" Bella was practically dancing in her seat. Charlie was way too agitated by this for it to be about nothing.
"She may have asked me out for coffee on Friday," he said hesitantly.
"Yes!" Bella crowed. "I knew it!"
"I did try to decline, at first. I don't want to give the wrong impression of me being out with a subordinate, but-"
"No!" Bella exclaimed. "Dad, you have to go with her!" It was the first time that Charlie had displayed any kind of interest in a female that Bella could remember. Not since Renée had walked out on him all those years ago. She imagined that it must have been incredibly hard on his self-esteem to have his wife leave him the way she had.
"I tried to tell her why," Charlie said ruefully. "She just smiled at me and said that she would remember not to ask me for any favors in the work place."
"Smart woman," Bella decided. Because her dad was still a young man at thirty-seven and deserved to go out with who he chose. He was quiet to be sure, but steady and dependable to the core. And handsome, if Bella did say so herself. She may be biased, but then her dad did bear more than a passing resemblance to Joe Manganiello. "Well, I hope you go through with it! And if she has any sense at all, she'll keep a good hold on you, Dad."
Charlie just laughed.
They were pulling into the driveway, when Bella saw that there two tall forms opening the front door and coming out onto the front stoop. But it wasn't till they started down the stairs that she realized who they were. Bess had barely come to a complete stop before she was flying up the stairs and hurling herself at Jared. For his own part, the Were seemed to realize that he was going to actually get the same kind of greeting that Sam usually got after long absences and so set himself so as to not go over backwards with her…laughing as she flew into his arms. "I missed you guys so much!" she exclaimed.
Embry smiled as she then moved to him and clung to him almost desperately.
Intellectually, he'd known she would be back, but he wouldn't deny the relief he felt in just holding the girl. It had felt as if a piece of him were missing with her gone, and now that she was back, that piece realigned with the gaping hole it had left and seamlessly settled into place. It had given him more of an appreciation for what she had felt when the Cullens had abandoned her, and he had hated every second of it.
"Good to have you back," he said quietly.
"Good to be back," Bella returned. "It just wasn't the same without you guys."
Jared and Charlie just shared a smile, before moving into the house. Sam had been given a key to the Swan home and it was carefully guarded by all of the pack who had the privilege of being invited. Charlie and Bella had apparently taken longer to get back than they had anticipated, because the boys had dinner started and were just waiting for the timer to go off on the baked mac and cheese.
"Thanks, boys," Charlie called out at the two who had gone ahead and grabbed Bella's bags from the truck bed. Jared raised a hand in a negligent wave before shouldering Bella's duffle bag. Bella wondered at how he didn't stumble under the rather significant weight of it, because it was a sizable bag and it was packed to the gills with Christmas loot.
Speaking of Christmas gifts… "Gareth and Rose had me bring their gifts for you back instead of shipping them. Said it would probably get to you faster that way."
Charlie grinned. He had sent them gifts early so that they could open them before they left for Jacksonville. Those two were good kids, and he was just thankful that he got to still be a part of their lives despite the lack of official relation by blood or marriage.
But despite the cheerfulness of everyone, Bella noticed that Embry seemed just a tiny bit…off. He smiled and acted relieved that she was back, but…she knew something was wrong. Watching Jared yielded no results, because he seemed just fine. Feeling for that link that she shared with the two boys, she noted that Jared was honestly chipper and excited to see her, while Embry's showed a shadow of sadness.
They both turned as they felt the minute tug as she checked their connection to her, and Jared's brows lifted in question. Embry simply dropped his gaze. Gotcha, Bella thought. She'd talk to him about what was bothering him later, because now it was clear he didn't want to bring it up in front of everyone.
Shaking her head, Bella just shrugged and Jared nodded with a brief glance at Embry. He knew something was up but Jared wasn't the sort to pry so he was going to let it go.
Dinner was a quiet, if cheerful affair, because Werewolves could rarely let an opportunity go by without thoroughly stuffing their faces. Embry seemed to perk up right around dessert, because who didn't love chocolate ice cream? His eyes brightened to match the faintly chocolaty smile that, had Bella not thought of him like a particularly dear brother, she would have been tempted to try and lick clean.
But then, Embry had always been handsome. Lean, fine-boned face and deep, intelligent eyes. His face was almost model-perfect, but for the faintly crooked nose that he had gotten from falling out of a tree when he was eight.
He was roughly six-and-a-half-feet of lean, beautifully proportioned muscle containing a sweet, quiet nature that Bella always thought an odd temperament to find in a Werewolf. But he had his moments of viciousness, too. Laurent could tell you all about it…if he wasn't a cold pile of ashes lying abandoned in the field Bella used to find so beautifully romantic.
Yet all in all, he was a wonderful young man and Bella adored him.
So she wondered what could possibly have brought him to feel as low as she had observed him to be when she had tested their bond. It had felt…hollow and sad. Despairing over something with no sense of relief in sight.
Embry and Bella eventually wandered upstairs to talk about Bella's trip. And talk she did. Told him about all the good and the bad. Even Embry was shocked about anyone thinking they could pull something so completely idiotic. "And she actually thought that crawling into bed with someone more inclined to snap her like a twig would be a good plan?!"
"Well, to be fair, he was a perfect gentleman up until Casey."
"I still can't believe that Paul let you get between the two of them," Embry said wonderingly. He was pretty sure Paul was the next best thing to a berserker, and to Paul, just being around a man who was invading the space of the only person he seemed to care for would have been like spilling blood in the water for a particularly vicious shark.
Bella wrapped her arms around her knees where she sat on the foot of the bed. "I honestly couldn't believe it, either. But he was pretty good about it. And he was right. I should have kicked Casey in the balls."
Embry was surprised to actually find himself in agreement with the resident bastard Were. Something he never would have believed, except for one thing…when it came to Bella, anything was possible. Vampires ignored their urges to eat the pretty little human. Werewolves broke with tradition and imprinted on a paleface girl in a sibling-like capacity. And Paul…whatever the fuck he was (Embry was damned sure there was some incredibly interesting genetics at work there, not that he'd ever admit to it, because come on! Weren't Werewolves pretty out there in the first place?) took a liking to a fragile little human girl, something that no one could ever have foreseen.
"So tell me how things went while I was gone," Bella prodded, poking Embry in the knee with a smile.
"Not a whole lot happened, to be honest," Embry prevaricated with a small laugh. "Things were pretty quiet around here. We worked, patrolled and Jacob-" he cut off awkwardly.
Bella waved him off. "It's okay if you talk about him. I'm not angry anymore."
She didn't add that she wasn't yet ready to forgive, but she wouldn't react like a bratty child if someone mentioned him or even spoke about him.
He looked unsure, but continued at her urging. "Jacob. Well, he's…he's starting to make amends for his behavior. None of us were really sure what was all said between him and Billy but it seems to have gotten to him." He didn't add that it was probably Bella's loss that had hurt more than his father's words. They had all seen tiny snippets of both the conversation and the letter that had hurt him so badly. And while Embry could appreciate her point of view…everyone had been wary of the younger Alpha after his actions against Paul…he also felt for his oldest friend who had gotten his heart unknowingly broken by his first real crush.
"I'm glad. He was pretty unhinged that last night. Well, so was I, to be honest-"
"Bella, you were defending someone who was currently helpless. No one will ever think less of you for what you did. Hell, even Jacob understands why you did it, now. He's already forgiven you. You just need to forgive yourself."
Bella propped her cheek against her knees. "What if I can't," she murmured, so quietly that had Embry not been supernatural he wouldn't have heard her.
"You're not a violent person at heart, Bella. But you were pushed. Everyone has their breaking point and you'd reached yours. Paul is dear to you and for the first time he was helpless to defend himself. You didn't know what Jacob intended to do next and you snapped."
"But Jacob is dear to me as well, no matter how angry I was at him. And I cut him out of my life," she mumbled.
"It's not the same thing," Embry insisted. "Paul was helpless, and Jacob had already attacked him. Sure, anyone male would wish you might have kicked him elsewhere, but let's face it, honey. You're short," he said with a playful smirk.
Bella gaped at him before a helpless burst of laughter escaped her.
"It kind of limits the areas that you could have kicked him and have him actually feel it. Because we all know that anything short of you taking a baseball bat to his hide would have been like getting punched by a gnat. It wasn't a bad thing that you went for the place that you would be felt." He didn't say that he thought Jacob had been damned lucky that it had been Bella to assault him and not Paul himself. Because even he suspected that Paul would likely have cheerfully broken Jacob into little screaming pieces, Alpha or no Alpha.
He'd just have to remember to never think that thought while in Wolf form because it went against every belief the tribe and Pack had.
"I don't know if I'm ready, yet, to try and mend our friendship. I mean, I'm mostly over what happened that night, but he'd been getting…controlling. It's not something I'm willing to tolerate again. I had enough of that with Edward," she muttered.
Embry bit back a growl. That was still a touchy subject for most of the Pack. That Jacob had left bruises on the girl had left Sam a bit hair-trigger in regards to his fellow Alpha. He'd wanted to take him down a few pegs for it, but without Bella's permission, his hands were tied. Then Jacob had gone over the edge and lost the girl anyway. Sam saw no point in kicking him further while he was already so low.
The twins, however, had spent weeks creatively imagining all the ways they could get back at him while in the Pack-mind, the only outlet they had for taking revenge, because if he had been any other Wolf and unable to Alpha Order them, they would have ganged up on him and beaten the crap out of him for what he had done. They were very partial to Bella, especially since Paul was.
It was funny, but half the time Embry actually wondered just who those two assholes were actually following, because they typically obeyed Sam only if it suited them to or Jacob when they absolutely had to.
"Jacob understands that he fucked up, and that it will take time," Embry stated clearly. "No one is going to push you into anything you aren't ready for." He'd make damned sure of that even if he had to prance off and tattle to Paul about it, because no one was going to going pull an end run around that fucker and they all knew it.
She nodded slowly, mulling over his words. "I just hate having driven a wedge between everyone."
"You think you did something that…oh, say Leah hasn't wanted to do for months? Adding you to the scenario just made her want to do it even more. The twins are more likely to listen to Paul than either Sam or Jacob anyway. Me? Yeah I was a bit surprised, but only because I never thought Jacob capable of something like that. Neither had Quill. Sam was mad only because of how Jacob was behaving, not you. You tend to take responsibility for things that are not only not your doing, but not even close to being your fault. I love you, but you have a bit of a martyr complex, kid."
Bella gaped, then . "But-!"
"No," he cut her off. "You do. I bet you even blame yourself for Jacob attacking Paul in the first place…don't you?"
"Now that was my fault! Jacob would never have attacked Paul if it hadn't been for me spending so much time with him!"
"And yet," Embry insisted, "Jacob has never liked Paul. He most likely would have attacked him sooner or later because that's the way Wolves are. Two alpha male personalities, and one of them supposedly born to rule over the other one that he can't really control? Yeah, cause that's not trouble just waiting to happen by the way. But that's beside the point. The point is, there would come a time when Jacob would be forced to attempt dominance over Paul, it's simply the way of things in a normal Pack. Now that's a double-edged sword because on the one hand, Paul didn't break an Alpha Order in the middle of a fight with a Vampire which is good. That way would lie trouble. Unfortunately, since he has now broken an Order, he's quite easily capable of shrugging off the next one unless it comes in tandem with Sam's. Sam hypothesizes that it has something to do with respect when it comes to Paul, and since Paul has lost the tiny shred of respect he had once had for Jacob, he can slip through the kid's Alpha Order like it never happened. Sam…well the one time he Ordered Paul to do something that Paul rightfully objected to, he lost respect for Sam. As a result, it was months before Sam could give an Order that Paul would actually be required to obey. It was a respect that Sam had to regain. Granted, even after, Paul's sometimes just too pissed off to actually hear the Order. But with Jacob? Well, it's a respect that Jacob never attempted to earn in the first place and so as a result he has no idea how to regain it. The worrying part is that when Jacob takes over the Pack, he will have no way to control Paul without that respect and that will cause mammoth-sized problems."
Bella blinked, because she was pretty sure that that was the most she'd ever heard the young man say all at once. And he wasn't quite done.
"Sam is already worried about it. And I don't blame him for it at all. Jacob is not equipped to handle Paul, at least not at this time. But let me stress this, just so you don't miss it. NONE of it is your fault. It can't possibly be." He stared her in the eye, willing her to take what he was saying to heart. "This has everything to do with two very different people who, in ideal circumstances, would never need to be in the same vicinity. Unfortunately, the Pack exists in a microcosm society and Jacob just can't avoid Paul. And please don't ever tell anyone that I told you this, but…I'm pretty sure that even when Jacob comes into his full power as the singular Alpha, he's going to find that he's still no match for Paul in a head-on brawl. And then things are going to get incredibly ugly."
Bella paled a bit as Embry's speech came to a halt. It was a lot of information to take in and it all spelled disaster. It may have been nice to hear that all the things she had been blaming herself for weren't actually her fault, but it didn't make things any less disastrous. Paul would never bow to Jacob because he had done nothing to deserve it…and Jacob would demand it as his due when he became the leader of the Pack. He thought the position itself was the thing to be respected, not understanding that it was the person filling the position that garnered the response he wanted. Sam had learned that lesson…it came with being a mature adult. Jacob may have had the physical stature of an adult, but mentally he was still a sixteen year old boy.
But…that wasn't what was worrying Embry. At least not really. It was a facet of the problem, because he cared about the players in the game, but still.
"Alright," Bella said. "That's a lot of food for thought. But that's not why I brought you up here. And I think you know that. So tell me what's really going on."
Embry pulled a hand down his face and closed his eyes with a sigh. He'd really been hoping to avoid this, because it was painful enough to live through it. But he also knew that Bella would never let this go. She cared too much to ever let her people suffer by themselves. It was something he loved about her, even if it would rip him apart to rehash the issue. Slim fingers brushed patiently through his hair and he could already see the gentle expression on her face despite his closed eyes. She would wait forever if need be. "I Imprinted."
"Oh! Isn't that a good thing, though?" He could hear the confusion in her voice.
"She doesn't want me." He hated the catch in his voice.
"But how could she not want you?!" She didn't get it. Embry was awesome! Her sweet, gentle brother was a catch and she'd smack anyone who dared say otherwise! "Are you sure? What did she say? Who is she? Because I'm pretty sure you could make anyone happy, and-"
"It was Leah."
Bella's face fell. Now it was clear. Leah wouldn't want anyone foisted upon her by Imprinting and would deny them on principle alone because she despised anything to do with it, and would never trust the emotions of anyone who had imprinted upon her. "Oh, Embry…
He flinched at the tone of her voice…sad and resigned. Because she knew what he had already known…Leah wasn't ready. Not for getting past her hurt over Sam, not for a new relationship, and certainly not for anything as intense as an Imprinted mate. "I'm not sure why it happened now. I've been around her for months, now, and I was sure I had looked her in the eyes before then. But I must not have because it felt like my whole world suddenly spun backwards on its axis and there she was. She was so beautiful, Bella. I must not have ever looked at her properly…never seen what was right in front of me. But she looked like I had betrayed her, somehow, and I can't tell you how much it hurt. I could never hurt her. That's how I knew…she didn't have to say a word and I knew she didn't want me. And I think," he stumbled, head dropping till his chin touched his chest, "I think she imprinted on me right back."
Bella scrambled across the bed to climb into his lap, wrapping herself around the emotionally-crushed young man.
"When did this happen," she asked quietly.
"The day after Paul left for Florida."
"How many of the other Wolves know?" She didn't want him to have to relive his own misery through their eyes every time he phased.
"None. Since the Imprinted Wolf has to become whatever is needed, and Leah seems to want to pretend it never happened, it gave me the ability to keep it to myself. I don't think of it when in Wolf form and neither does she."
Bella bit her lip, but could only hug him harder. She could see no out for him in this newest tangle that he found himself in. It was terrible and painful and she wished she could see any way to fix it. But until Leah got over her hurt and anger, Embry was stuck. He would never subject a person to the kind of rejection that it would take to break an imprint because he was far too kind, and Leah had been hurt enough. Though, she imagined it must say something that Leah had not immediately turned on Embry and repudiated him. Even she wouldn't be that cruel to an innocent party. "You know that if Leah has Imprinted on you, she will feel how you are dealing with this. She can't ignore it if she hurts you out of fear and what is probably a good dose of panic."
It was small, cold comfort, but he would take even the thinnest silver lining he could manage to find. He kissed her forehead in thanks as silence descended upon the room.
}:{
Long after Embry had run home, Bella lay in her bed, quietly rehashing in her head all the information she had been given that night. It was an astonishing much, and she sorted it into neat mental files before going over it once again. That Jacob was coming around was wonderful. She was glad to hear it. That she had apparently had a bit to do with it seemed the accepted belief of a number of the Pack members. She would have to talk to Sam about what he thought about maybe re-establishing lines of communication between her and her childhood best friend.
She'd had time to think it over and had finally realized the driving motivation to Jacob's issues. She could have smacked herself for not figuring it out sooner, but since Jacob was only another brother to her, she'd never bothered to look for signs of attraction in the boy. She'd shamelessly brother-zoned the boy at an early age and had never looked beyond it to possibly starting a relationship. Not that she was looking to start one now, because she was hopelessly in love with her current best friend.
She yawned, something that she took as a good sign that she might actually stand to get some real sleep tonight despite being alone for the first time in a week.
But Jacob's friendship wasn't the only issue on the table. Embry had spelled out a great deal of the trouble in the Pack as it stood, trouble she'd never even contemplated before. That Paul had no respect for Jacob was a given…the boy had never done a thing to earn it, other than being born under the right roof. Whereas Sam had Paul's respect in spades. She just hoped that Jacob didn't attempt to take over anytime soon, because she could see it all going to hell in its very own little hand-basket.
Then there was Embry.
God, she didn't even know what to think about that one. It was a bit like a Shakespearean tragedy in a lot of ways. He wants her, but she doesn't want him, because she'd been burned by another just like him. Because Sam was a good man all the way through. Just like Emily was a good woman. But so was Leah. And she'd been hurt so very badly by her very own genetics that it was like a cosmic joke. She'd almost killed her own father, or so she saw it. Harry said he had always been prone to a weak heart and it wasn't her fault that she was the very first female Wolf. He couldn't have been more proud of his daughter.
Bella sighed. She didn't know what to do to help any of them and it galled her. They had all done so much for her. Been there for her when she was at her lowest. Maybe she just needed to do the same for them? If one did one's best at what they could do, then would it be considered enough? She hoped so.
The timer on her phone went off, telling her that it was late enough to make the call she had been waiting to make.
Dialing the now-familiar number, she waited for it to ring through. "You've reached The Haven. How may I help you," came the cool voice of the proprietor.
"Haven, its Bella."
"Ah, Bella! What can I do for you, love?" Haven's voice was far friendlier once he realized who was on the line.
Bella grinned in spite of herself. "I was just calling to see if Paul was on break yet."
"Still having trouble sleeping?"
"I think I may actually fall asleep tonight," Bella returned, not at all surprised that the man knew about the problem she'd been having. "I just wanted to call and say goodnight. And to thank you for loaning him out! It was greatly appreciated and I hope it didn't put you in too much of a lurch?"
"Not at all. He hadn't taken a holiday since he started working here, so he was due." She could practically hear the smile in his voice, reassuring her that he was telling the truth. "And speaking of himself, here's your young man," he said, passing the phone over before she could correct him.
"Bella?"
"Hey, Paul. I was just calling to say goodnight and to thank you again for coming out to visit with me."
"Anytime. You only have to ask." In the background, she could hear Haven saying he was needed on the floor, then the telltale click of the office door shutting behind him.
"Still," she continued. "He didn't have to let you go, and neither did Sam. What does Haven think about flowers?" she asked only half-jokingly.
"I'd say he dislikes daisies and tulips and prefers black or white roses," Paul responded with a smirk in his voice.
Bella made a mental note of that and wondered what the man in question would think if she actually sent him some. Might be worth it just to see the look on his handsome face. Of course, she yawned again just then, setting the Were to chuckling. "You should sleep," he suggested.
"I know," she said. Another yawn later and she decided it was time to sign off for the night. "Anyway. You have a good night. I'll see you soon?"
"Count on it. Good night," he said.
"Night." And then she was clicking off the phone.
She was asleep even before her head even hit the pillows.
}:{
a.n. phew! Another long one! Between you and me, I hate filler chapters, but unfortunately it had to happen…Poor Embry! I felt so bad doing that to him!
Chaos. Things are coming to ahead faster than a pimple ready to blow! I hope you all enjoyed this saga XD And an FYI, we plan this story to be an extended - much better than reality t.v. but the same approximate length in words- journey with our friends. Sorry this pitstop was more establishing the plot and future direction rather than more Bella and Paul interaction deliciousness. I do have to say we're very excited for the next chapter ;)