Chapter 21

Liar

A frosty wind blew past Ellie's back, seemingly pushing her forwards. She was doing all she could to contain the waves of anger that were pulsing within her.

She was so angry. For reasons she could not understand and for reasons she understood all too well. Her face was flushed, her fists clenched, her heart quaking and pounding in her ears. She wanted to scream and shout and rage, but she was still walking on public streets, throngs of people near and far.

It was one of those times she wished for every body and soul in the world to disappear. She always imagined it so well in her mind. She could see herself walking down an empty street, deathly silent and eerie. The image always comforted her in times like these. Times when there were far too many people, none of them acting the way they should.

Catherine. And a boy. Marriage. Married? Finace? I mean…she has a fiance? She's getting married. She's…

Each thought sparked a new bout of rage in her and she picked up her pace. She was close to breaking into a full sprint when she realized where exactly she had escaped to.

Central Park was vast. Ellie had spent a goof part of her childhood exploring every tree and rock, placing her hands on them, feeling their course textures. In all of the park this place was her favorite.

A line of trees, unusually close together, hid her favorite spot. One had to step off the trail and squeeze in between them to reach it. Behind the wall of trees sat a smattering of large rocks. Well, when she was young they seemed large.

As she looked on them now, they seemed small, even fake.

Memories are such liars. She thought bitterly, recalling all the times her memories had mislead her.

She fell onto a rock, her backside stinging from the sudden pressure. Shoulders sagging, her head fell into her hands and she lost her self to the blackness of the backs of her eyes lids. Dark swirls of red and blue and green danced before her in the blackness, circles and spirals forming and spinning with terrible speed.

She tried mixing up her thoughts, distracting herself, tried to think of everything and nothing all at once. But she could not hide from the truth.

Ellie knew very well why she was upset. She knew it, really, from the moment she had laid eyes on Simon.

When she could resist the truth now longer, the words came together in her head. They echoed louder than church bells with even more conviction.

All of my life…I tried to be the one. But…I could never change Catherine. I could never make her see. All this time, every time I tried to make her understand. And this man comes along. And he does it. He makes her happy, he set her free.

The question that followed the truth was even more terrifying. It attached itself to Ellie's heart and sucked the blood right out of her.

Why couldn't I be the one?

New waves of hatred bombarded her.

How could you be so petty? A sneering voice whispered. So selfish. Can't you even pretend to be happy for her.

You've always been like this. Poor, pathetic little Elizabeth. Second always. Never best. Poor little baby. Sister's getting married. Found a love. Now she's spontaneous. Now she believes in love. And what do you believe in?

Stupid little girl. Gallivanting with a god of mischief. A vagabond. A theif. A Liar.

You deserve each other. Jealous little creatures. Never let him go girl. You'll never find a Simon. Always a Loki. Always odd. Always second. Never best.

"And what, pray tell, is this?"

A voice, the only voice, shot through her thought's like a fiery arrow. Elli felt the choking sob lodged in her throat diminish to a sorrowful whimper. She knew who it was.

Him.

Just like me. Always second. Never best.

She rubbed her eyes vigorously, swallowing every lament. She did not want him to see her this way. He couldn't. She wanted no pity.

However, even as her resolve was building, her words were lost to her. Finally she stood up and faced him, hoping that her eyes weren't red.

Once again, she was stilled by the sight of him. A thick breeze was running around them, causing the brush to shiver, causing his hair to dance, causing his coat to waver in it's wake.

He's so beautiful. Ellie thought, So much so…I ache.

She sniffled, running the back of her hand (which was swimming in the sleeve of her jacket) over her nose. As she felt one small tear run down her cheek, she knew that there was nothing she could do to stop it.

She wobbled towards him. And as she did she accepted her sorrow. She let it wash over her in a salty wave. Standing, her toes to his, she leaned her head up to look him straight in the eye.

His gaze was the first thing she had known of him. It was the same. She could see the cat, the little priss, her rescuer, the insufferable Eric, the fearful monster, the blue skinned nightmare, the trickster, the god, the undeniably coy one, the tempter, the lover.

She swayed on her feet, leaning into her. Her hands rested on his chest, her cheek enjoying the feeling of his expensive clothes. She sighedm trying to cover up another choking sob.

Loki smiled. The feeling of her small form pressed up against hiom brought joy to his black heart. He knew she loved him. And to be loved by such a creature…one as sweet and as lovely as her…

It only makes this…all the more difficult.

He wound one arm around her waist. The other cradling the back of her head, running his fingers over her scarlet locks.

"What is wrong?" He said, breathing a laugh. A failed attempt at shadowing his own grief.

"I'm upset, Loki." Ellie muttered into him. Her grip teething on the thick frabci of his coat. She wished he would speak now. She only wished for him to hold her and comfort her.

She lifted herself up onto her toes, clutching his collar with her hands and pressed her lips to his. The smell of him so close, shattered her welling tears and pulled the weights from her chest.

It wasn't until then that Ellie realized…Loki was upset. Just as she was. He wasn't responding to her touch, like he normally did. He was not smiling, not laughing. His grip around her waist did not budge. His hand in her hair fell away.

In one deft move, he placed his hand on her shoulder and pushed he back down onto her heels. His eyes were swirling with pain. Those green eyes.

She gulped, scared for him. He seemed completely despondent, lost in the sheer awfulness of his thought. What does he know? Ellie thought.

"Loki…"

"I must leave you." He said, his voice devoid of any feeling. Only afterwards did he realize how cruel he must have sounded. He wished to take the words back and try again. But they had already sunk into her skin, into her mind.

"What?" Ellie said, her voice thick. She had heard him quite clearly. But the words were muddled in her mind.

"I am sorry." he said, feeling foolish. He did not come here to apologize.

When he had seen her name, her picture, the scores of information SHIELD had collected in a matter of days, he knew straight away that he must disappear. He could not risk being discovered. More importantly, he did not want Ellie to be taken from him.

When he had discovered the reason for SHIELD interest in Ellie he almost ended the lives of every mortal in the vicinity.

The man who did not belong, the soldier, had asked about her. After the chaos Loki had left behind in the club, the soldier had made it out alive. And once he was safely tucked away in the bowls of SHEILD he had asked after the ginger haired girl. The one who had been kind to him. The one who had vanished. SHIELD had attempted to track her down after the soldier refused to cease his questions. He wanted to know that she was safe.

Recalling the thought made Loki's ice blood boil. Why was the man so taken with Ellie. He had known her for mere minutes. And still, he worried after her.

Loki felt jealousy wrap around him like a vice.

I should be the only one to worry . The only one to care for her. To…love her.

No, he would be the one to leave. His plans had been set in motion, but there were many gears that needed fitting. He had always planned on taking Ellie with him, showing her new worlds, having her all to himself, miles away.

Now he could see how foolish an idea it had been. If she were to disappear now…SHIELD would take notice. He had to leave her hear. And when the time was right, he would return to this realm.

With an army he would come. He would conquer. And Ellie, Elizabeth, would be his queen. Standing by his side, she would be exalted and worshiped. As she deserved to be.

"But I must leave you, Elizabeth." He said, his tone exacting finality.

Ellie understood the words, though she did not wish to.

"Why?" She called, her voice a ghostly whisper.

"You need not concern yourself…" Loki cooed, the backs of his fingers running over her cheek. He bent down to press his lips to her forehead, but her hands on his chest held him back.

"I'm not a child, Loki." Ellie said. "I'm not an enemy. I'm not even a dear friend. I'm…"

What am I? she thought. Just what did she mean to Loki anyway? Why is he leaving me?

A terrible thought struck her. Maybe she meant nothing to him. Maybe he was done with her.

Loki could see anguish etched onto her face. She seemed to be struggling with many emotions. He wanted to comfort her, but it was something he had never done for anyone else in the past.

"What am I…?" Ellie asked in whisper. "Loki…?"

"Oh darling girl," he said, pulling her to him. His head fell onto her shoulder. He could not begin to explain what she was to him. There was no word in any realm that could properly define it. "You are everything."

Ellie felt ill. She wanted to believe him, she was desperate to believe him. But she knew what he was. She had watched him lie to others, listened to his tales of mischief and fun, she knew him. And she wondered. Wondered if he truly meant everything he said to her.

But why did it even matter?

I know why…

What she knew had burrowed into her heart months ago, and only now, when she had seen him in the park dressed so finely, long black hair so beautifully coiffed, eyes so dark yet so beautiful…she had known right then.

That, against all her judgment, she loved him. She was sick with love for him.

Loki, a god, had plunged into her skin like a needle and coursed through her veins. She had loved him before she knew him. She loved the lies. Even when she knew they were lies. She still loved them.

But did he love her? In truth? Did he feel anything for her?

She realized that she could never know.

Ellie shook the thoughts away from her head. If she thought on it for a second longer she feared she would burst into choking sobs. Instead, she held tighter to him. So much so she thought she must be causing him pain.

With great ease, Loki pulled away from her. He could not stay much longer, else he feared he would no be able to leave her. His hands rested on her shoulders, then trailed up and held her face.

Such beauty. He noted for the thousandth time. I will miss it dearly when I am gone.

"I will return to you" He said. His thumb brushed away a tear that dribbled down her cheek.

His words sounded miles and miles away, but the feeling of his breath against her skin rocked Ellie's body with the force of a hurricane wind.

Ellie placed her hand over his. This is not happening.

Loki looked down upon her, on the woman he loved. He realized the irony. He was no stranger to it. I am in love with her. A mortal.

He looked to the sky. The fates must be laughing at me. Enjoying this.

His eyes returned to those of his beloved and he felt his resolved crack.

She looks so sad.

"Please," He heard her say.

Before she could finish, he pressed his lips to hers. She answered back in kind. His arms wrapped round her waist, pulling her to him, tearing her from the ground. Ellie's feet floating beneath her, and she held tightly to him. Their lips were lost to hell's fire, tongue's winding together. Breath seemed trivial, time seemed endless.

Still, like all things…the end came.

Ellie found herself back on the ground. Loki had released her.

She looked up at him, discombobulated and confused. He seemed distracted and…sad.

He took three labored steps away from her towards the trees.

Ellie pushed forward as if to follow him. She suddenly stopped, not of her own will. She knew he had willed her sudden inability to move. Her feet felt like led. She looked at her feet, tiny pin pricks danced across her skin, willing her heart to beat faster and faster. She looked up and-

He was gone.

A breeze as cold as ice ran over her skin. Ellie shivered.

I will return to you.

His last words. She looked to the unforgiving grey sky. It was the same sky. The same as the day she had found him. Crumpled and broken and small.

And now he was strong again. Beautiful and strong.

I will return to you.

Ellie's limp hand became a fist. A wave a hot tears poured from her eyes. No…

"Liar."

As you lean in for your last kiss

Who in this world could ask me to resist

Your hands cold as they find my neck

Oh this love that I have found…

I detest.

-Liar, Mumford & Sons

*So little note. I wanted Loki to say the same line as Thor said to Jane. But then I had this long thought. The brothers are different. Thor says: I will return for you. It's terribly romantic yes, but a little possessive, a little condescending. So I made it so that Loki says the same thing, yet that one word change makes a thousand differences. I will return to you. I don't know do with it what you will, I just felt the need to point it out.

Anyway…

Before the author (that's me) get all mopey and teary eyed, I just want to say how grateful I am if you are reading this. That means that you stuck with me! I started out with a little, intimate story and then all of sudden, massive ploys brewed in my head and I just couldn't stop myself. Thank you to everyone who reads, continued to read, and reviews. You guys have turned some pretty awful days into great ones.