Chapter 21-

it'd been two weeks since I flew out to see Jon, I had ended up traveling with him, Joe and Colby, it was helping bring me out of my depression, I had to fly home in the next couple of days to go to an appt with Ashley to make sure I was healing ok after JJ's birth.

The only snag Jon wouldn't touch me, not like kept his space, he held me just as tight against him when we slept, and kissed me with as much love and passion just like he always have, but the moment it would start to go further he'd back off and I couldn't understand why.

I craved his touch so badly it was starting to physically hurt, I needed to feel him touch me in a way only he could and I didn't know how to bring it up to him.

I turned on my side my eyes slowly fluttering open, I smiled at his angelic face, a quiet laugh escaping my lips that is one word I would never have imaged using to describe Johnathan Good, but when he was asleep it was the only word I could find.

His mind shut down and his face in a peaceful rest, his blonde hair messier then usually, I reached out slowly caressing his face before closing my eyes feeling overly tired.

I had stayed away from the arena, I just wasn't ready for that yet, however that all changed today, I would go to the arena and have a meeting with Stephanie, hunter and Vince to discuss my return, I was hoping I could get back before wrestlemania.

I closed my eyes hoping to catch a little bit more sleep, however Jon had other plans as I felt him pull me closer into him he kissed my forehead mumbling a scratch "good morning darlin." I smiled I love his morning voice its scratchy and I don't even know how to explain it, but its one of my favorite things to hear, I nuzzled my face into his chest groaning "do we have to get up?" I whined

I heard him chuckle as he patted my back side before sitting up "Come on, I'll make breakfast." I smiled since that morning one thing we did was always get a room with a kitchenette in it, Jon enjoyed cooking breakfast for me, and I enjoyed the small bit of normality we'd got from it.

I slowly tumbled out of the bed not caring I was in a white tank top and my pink polka dot boy short underwear as I walked over to the coffee maker starting the coffee, I didn't care to do anything with my mess hair as I ran my hand over my smudged eyeliner from the night before, before sitting down at the table just as Jon opened the bathroom door.

"get the coffee while I go smoke?" he asked, I just nodded this was our routine, and most people probably would find it boring, but I loved it, I loved this time where I felt like this would be if we didn't travel all the time and lived together.

I frowned wondering what it'd be like to have JJ, I shook my head quickly stopping those thoughts as I got up making our coffee, well more of pouring his black and making mine with my cream and sugar, setting them on the table I went over to my bag pulling a pair of black leggings out, Joe and Colby where sure to show up before we finishing eating, that's how it normally worked out, they'd finished the food off and all three would go off to the gym and I normally went back to sleep for a couple of hours.

I sat in a meeting with Hunter, Stephanie and Vince going over plans and ideas for my return, Hunter nodded "i love all of it." Stephanie nodded in agreence looking over at her farther "I like it, I do." I sighed watching the wheels in Vince's head turn "Just uh, we have Brock and your dad-" I groaned "with Heyman, your the first Heyman girl, what if we brought you back into this line." he asked as I rubbed my face "I'd rather not." I answered honestly.

"OK well then we'll take your ideas and run it around creative, get back to you after wrestlemania." I felt my stomach drop "seriously?"

"Well we already have the card lined up." I frowned looking to hunter who was shaking his head in disapproval "how would this play?" I asked making Vince smile going into his ideas, I really didn't want to work with my ex, or my dad at this point, im not saying not ever but I wanted to get out of that undertakers daughter image.

"Are you cleared for in ring yet?" Vince asked, I shook my head "I have an appointment coming up at the end of the week and should be." I told him.

"OK, Sam, I am really sorry for yours and Jon's loss." he told me, I cleared my throat nodding "uh thanks." my voice cracked at the mere mention of my son before quickly walking out of the office.

I blew out a breath shoving my hands in my pockets, I didn't know how I would explain this to Jon without him exploding he didn't want me anywhere near Brock much less working with him.

I turned the corner, something odd stopping me.

Jon was at the end of the hall and he was talking to Renee Young. I didn't know why, but it bothered me. It was stupid. They weren't doing anything but talking, but it still made my stomach churn. Renee laughed loudly as she stared happily up at Jon. Since we had been dating, I hadn't seen Jon really interact with other women, I mean unless saying hello or bye to one of my friends, family or Joe's fiance counted. He treated me as if I were the only woman in the world, maybe that was why this bothered me, I wasn't used to it. I felt stupid for being jealous, but I was, I knew that look she was giving him all to well.

"Hey baby girl." I heard softly from beside me making me tear my eyes off of my boyfriend and the beautiful blonde interviewer, I nodded as Joe gave me a side hug "what are you doing here?" he asked

"Uh finishing up with the boss man on plans for my return." I watched his face go from shocked to controlled "That's awesome, whens the come back? Let me guess wrestle mania." I laughed shrugging, I didn't need anyone knowing until I told Jon.

"They're uh figuring out cards pretty booked."i shrugged hearing Rene laugh rather obnoxiously loudly

"Trust me baby girl you got nothing to worry about, that man is blindly madly in love with you, his not going to jeopardize that" Joe spoke as if he could read my thoughts, I blew out a breath nodding "stupid, to be jeouls, I know, but I just-" I swallowed hard looking done shrugging.

Joe frowned bending down to my eye contact "what baby girl?" he asked making me look up at him

"He hasn't touched me, since-" I shook my head "im just-" I blew out a breath feeling an arm around my shoulders, I looked over seeing Jon who quickly frowned at my face, he cupped my cheek "hey whats wrong? Did the meeting not go good?" he asked, I bit my lip shaking.

"Uh well it went, I'll tell you later." I mumbled not wanting to get into wit h him over this here and feeling crappy the way I was right now.

"Joe, give us a minute?" he asked taking my hand, Joe nodded giving me a reassuring smile as Jon led me through the hall and to the roof top, I sighed sitting on the pile of creates as he lit a cigarette "whats goin on darlin?" he asked looking over at me concerned, I shrugged picking at my nail polish.

"I uh why where you talking to Rene?" I asked looking up at him

he shrugged taking a drag "was on my way to find you, she stopped me, started chatting." he explained non chantely, I nodded "its just weird, because you know, you don't really talk to other-" I cleared my throat "people." I trailed off looking to the side.

I heard Jon chuckle and his foot steps come closer to me, he sat next to me putting his arm around me "awe darlin your jealous." I rolled my eyes "I'm not." I muttered feeling him kiss the side of my head "babe there's no reason to be jealous." I sighed

"I'm not jealous.!" I exclaimed standing up feeling an instant anger course through me "Just forget it Jon you don't understand." I muttered heading towards the door.

"Sam whoa wait." Jon called after me I felt him grab my arm turning me to face him "talk to me, didn't we discuss this not shutting each other out."Jon sternly reminded me I turned my head whimpering as tears fell down my nose "baby, talk to me." Jon spoke more gently

"you haven't touched me." I looked at him his face expressing shock "since JJ you haven't touched me, you hold me at night yes, and you kiss me, yes but you haven't touched me." I cried I used my hand to wipe away the tears "And then you talking to Rene and I don't know, I wasn't jelouos, I was hurt, your where laughing with her like you used to with me." I admitted him, Jons face softening.

"Oh baby-" he leaned closer putting both of his hands on the side of my face I stared up at him unsure "I didn't know if you where ready for that just yet, I wanted to make sure I gave you enough time." he told me "And Rene, shes not even a friend, I passed by she said hi, darlin I fucking love you, I want you." before I could respond his lips came crashing passionately down on mine, I moaned wrapping my arms around his neck as he gripped the back of my head tightly holding me close to him as my back hit the hot wall, but I didn't care as the feeling of butterflies in the pit of my stomach fluttered.

We slowly pulled away from each other "lets go." Jon took my hand making me laugh as he quickly walked us into the arena, I laughed as we sped walk down the halls, Jon on a mission for something I wasn't quiet sure just yet.

We passed by where they where setting up for tonight's interviews, Rene standing there, her smile got wide seeing Jon, I rolled my eyes "Hey Jon!" she smiled looking over to me her smile seemed to get smaller, I smirked at her especially when Jon kept walking, he was a man on a mission as he led me to his locker room, thankfully they set the shield up in a spot that no one went down.

The dark room was thankfully unoccupied "what if?-" I started when Jon shut and lock the door before I knew it his lips where crashing down on mine.

He grabbed me around the waist with trembling fingers, his gentle, as if he was scared of hurting me.

I laughed pulling away smiling at him "you know im not going to break right? I'm not as delicate as you think hun."

he sighed nodding putting his forehead against mine, his hands running up and down my sides "I know, I feel like im going to hurt you, I just don't want it to hurt you-"

I put my fingers to his lips to silence him "Just shut up and kiss me" I breathed as his lips came crashing down on mine, he didn't need anymore encouragement after that.

By round three, I was dead, Jon did the job of making me feel more then wanted, the first round was slow and sweet, by the second round it was hungry and needy, the third was just I cant even explain it, powerful. "You've killed me." I panted causing Jon to chuckle. I felt him pressed against my naked ass as the back of his hand came and floated down my sides.

"God, you're beautiful." He mumbled and moved down to cupping my ass, his lips kissing in between my neck and shoulder, I closed my eyes smiling "Jon, I'm dead." I said as I turned around and wrapped my arms around his neck, pressing my chest against his, he smiled pushing some lose strands of hair out of my face I cupped his cheek and then moved away to get dressed.

He quickly put his track pants on and a shirt before walking over behind me strapping me back into my bra. He brushed my hair over my shoulder. "I want you to know, one day, im going to make you mine, and you wont have to ever second guess how much you mean to me." He whispered hungrily in my ear. Sliding his hand down planting his firmly on my stomach, I smiled in return and pulled up my black leggings.

"You got cum on my shirt!" I glared at him holding up my white button up professional shirt that was stained with his stuff on it!

"Here." He handed his Shield shirt, I shook my head, if he had it his way I'd wear this damn shield shirt as a stamp that I was his "I love you." he smiled at me, that boyish smile of his that seemed to work like a charm every damn time I was mad at him.

"And I love you." I told him he gave my ass a hard slap making me whelp as I passed him out the door.

I looked at my watch. "Oh god, we've been gone a long time. the shows due to start soon." my stomach tightened in knots as I had to still tell him what Vince wanted me to do for my come back, I had decided if it was a huge issues for him I would tell Vince I could wait until after wrestle mania. to return, I didn't want his to cause a rift between us again.

"Time flies when you're fucking." He swung his arm around me, I smacked his chest "you gotta be so crude." I joked playfully with him as he guided me back to where there were people. "I'm going for a run. I'll catch you later, ?" he winked making me laugh.

I smirked as I watched him go. I knew he would leave butterflies in my stomach for a long time. I bit my lip shaking my head.

"Sam!" I heard Nikki's voice, I took a deep breath,i would have to face my friends sooner or later, I slowly turned around seeing Nikki walking to over towards me, I fought the urge I had to bolt as she got closer I noticed her eyes landed to my flat stomach.

I stumbled back when she tightly wrapped her arms around me "I have been calling and texting and bugging Jon about you." she hugged me tightly, I closed my eyes nodding slowly pulling away, she offered me a smile "I want to ask how your doing, but that's just dumb." I smiled at her honesty, that's one thing I've always loved about Nicole was her honesty and bluntness.

"I'm sorry I didn't return your calls or text's, I just needed some time." I cleared my throat "I still have my hard moments, but Jon's been amazing getting me through everything." I told her, she nodded just as Brie walked up looking shocked to see me, I really didn't want to go through this over and over.

"Shes fine." Nikki spoke sternly as if reading my thoughts, I chuckled hugging Brie "I'm fine, and again I am sorry for not returning anyone's calls, I just needed some time, but im getting better every day." I explained. Brie nodded "Of course and im sure you don't want to keep talking about it so, are you returning?" she asked as we linked arms and walked through the halls to catering.

I took a deep breath before we entered "Look screw any one who has anything to say, Jon will just punch them in the face and I'll slap any of the women." Nikki smiled at me, I shook my head smiling nodding as we walked in.

"are you hungry?" Nikki asked just as my stomach rumbled, I laughed "uh yea I had quite the work out earlier." remembering mine and Jon's earlier activities.

Nikki raised an eye row nudging me as we both started laughing getting salads and water bottles we sat down at a table, I could feel the eyes on me, but chose to ignore it.

"So are you coming back?" Nikki excitedly asked, I smiled "uh had a meeting, trying to figure some stuff out." I spoke taking a bite, I was starting to feel uncomfortable as if the eyes and whispers were all about me.

"you think in time for wrestle mania.?" Brie asked as I pulled out my phone texting Jon if he was finished running.

"they're trying but the shows pretty full so they don't know if they can fit me in, im hoping." I smiled taking a bite "enough about me, how's everything with you two?" I smiled

"Oh my god, you don't know!" Brie smiled just as my phone buzz, she held out her left hand showing my the diamond ring, I gasped "awe! Congratulations!"

"Gosh have I been away fro that long?" I laughed sitting back looking at my phone "just finished."

"wanna come rescue me, I feel like all eyes are on me" I sent back to him as I took another bite of my salad.

"Are you going to talk to her about your issues?" Brie nudged Nikki who rolled her eyes, I frowned "whats wrong?" I asked her

"it uh, John and I, I just I don't know if his that serious about us." I frowned confused "last I heard you two where moving in what happened?" feeling genuinely concerned for my friend.

"well yea and when I got down there and already moved in, he hands me this contract of rules to live there, and I don't know its so exhausting living with him, there's the dirty clothes hamper, and the stinky dirty clothes hamper-" she rolled her eyes as I giggled "Cant have candles, cant hang up pictures."

"Awe have you tried talking to him about this." Nikki shook her head taking a bite of a grape "no I mean how do I say I love you, I want a future with you but you freaking crazy!"

"his OCD, and always has been, god I wish I could get Jon to be that organized with his dirty laundry!" we all laughed Brie nodding in agreence "right Bryan always gets his clothes next to a laundry hamper!"

"hey I would be happy with that, Jon just has a trail of where he starts to take his clothes of to the foot of the bed."

"what about me?" I heard as arms wrapped around me, I smiled feeling him kiss my cheek before sitting down next to me, I noticed he was showered and ready for the show "your inability to undress in one spot." I smiled over at him, he shrugged leaning over taking a bite of my salad making me shake my head as the girls smiled at us.

He grabbed my hand "ready?" he asked straight forward, I offered the girls a smile.

"We'll have to have lunch." nikk I smiled as I stood up nodding "yea abouselty, and Nik just talk to him." I advised, she nodded as Jon put his hand on my lower back leading me out of catering, I let out a breath.

"you ok?" Jon asked pulling me closer into him, I sighed laying my head against as we walked down the hall ""Yea they didn't bring it up, but I don't know, it just felt like everyone was looking, like they wanted to say something but didn't know how." I looked up to him as we stopped walking.

He nodded "It'll get better." he whispered bending down kissing me "wanna watch me do this interview?" he asked nodding towards where Colby and Joe where standing with Rene, I fought the urge to roll my eyes as I nodded.

I did love watching Jon though, he was unbelievable, honestly he could by the time he finished cutting his promo or cutting an interview have you believing that the sky was purple and aliens existed.

"hey Sam!" Colby excitedly waved at me, I laughed "hey colbs." I greeted back sitting on one of the create across from where they'd be interviewing, Again I could of sworn I seen Rene's face change seeing me with a slight eye rolls "whats that about?" I heard next to me, I smiled seeing Paige standing next to me "HEY!-" I giggled hugging her "and I have no clue, I seen her and Jon talking earlier, and I thought maybe I was being parionod with the looks she gave me."

"Mm girl I don't think so." Paige crossed her arms, I frowned looking up at my friend "something I need to know?" I asked hearing Rene laugh at whatever Jon just said.

"No, not on Jons end, besides the drinking, he was a well behaved little boy." she smiled at me making me shake my head and turn my eyes back on him.

Watching the way Rene looked at him, I sighed "she likes him though." I could tell

"yea she does, but trust me, you have nothing to worry about, he loves you my little crumpet." Paige patted my head making me laugh.

"I just I don't know, we're not even at a one year mark yet, and been through all this shit." I frowned

"Awe crumpet, don't think like that, the strongest relationships are ones that are built on surviving things designed to destroy them." I just nodded as Jon walked over to us.

"Alright well off I go, Hey you and I -" she pointed between us "need to plan something soon." I smiled nodding "for sure." I smiled as Jon wrapped his arm around my waist, laying his head on my shoulder he placed a gentle kiss on it peeking up at me.

I giggled cupping his cheek, I abstrusely loved it when he did things like this, he looked like a lost little boy I ran my finger tips over his face he closed his eyes.

This was the first time I truly noticed it, how exhausted he looked, I frowned he had spent so much time and energy taking care of me, getting me through this, I leaned forward capturing his lips with me, closing my eyes I deepened the kiss hearing him moan as he quickly took control.

"Mm not that im complaing, but where did that come from?" he asked as broke the kiss, I shook my head shrugging "I just felt like it, I love you, you know that right?" I asked him, he frowned nodding "Yea I know that, whats going on?" he asked

I sighed blowing out a breath "They want me to work with my dad and lesnar for my come back, take a few bumps from Lesnar."

I jumped back when Jons hand hit the wall covering my mouth "Jon!" I frowned grabbing his hand, he quickly yanked it away turning his head from me "Im fine."

"I haven't agreed, I wanted to talk to you, Jon I don't want this to cause an issue for us." I told him he sighed running his hand over his face "i hate you being any where fucking near him." I frowned.

"I know." I muttered looking down, Jon blew out a breath "I gotta go get in place, we'll talk tonight OK." I frowned looking at his hand "im fine, ive done worse." his eyes followed mine.

"Jon I'll tell them no if this is going to cause problems with us." I told him, he sighed stepping closer to me "we'll talk tonight, privately." I nodded knowing he didn't want this out around the locker room gossip mill, we both were very private people, I nodded frowning as Jon leaned in kissing me "I gotta meet the guys though, I love you." he assured me, I nodded as he squeezed my hand walking off.

I frowned watching him walk away leaning against the wall, I fought off tears "Just fan fucking tastic." I muttered to myself.

I turned and looked down the hall he just walked down, before I knew it I found myself sliding down the create and quickly walking to catch him before they went into their spot for their match.

I seen him standing with security and the guys, Joe nudged him making him look up, his eyes looked like a storm of emotions, I blew my breath, he already seen me cant turn around now, I slowly walked over to him.

"Look I know you have your match, and I know you said we'll talk later, but before you go out there, like this-" I waved my hand in front of him indicating his angry demeanor "I just wanted to tell you this, nothing or no one is worth coming between us, Listen im yours-" I watched as he tried to fight a smirk on his face, he looked down wrapping his tape on his hand that was already swollen and bruised "That's it, that's what I needed to tell you, Jon I'm one hundred percent yours. And all of the rest of this shit, we'll get past it, because I love you and you love me and the rest of it doesn't matter." I cupped his face making him look at me, he nodded leaning in kissing me " I love you." he mummored against my lips.

I nodded running my thumb over his cheek, out of the side I could see Joe and Colby smirking as they watched us "go kick ass boys." I smiled at them as I turned to walk away, Jon squeezing my hand before slowly letting go as I headed towards the shields locker room.

I sat down on the couch, I wanted to say everything would be fine, but the feeling in the pit of my stomach, it felt like it wasn't OK, and it wasn't going to be OK, I took a deep breath hearing the shields music play, I smiled watching him walk down as fans grabbed at him.

I sat back on the couch as I never thought I would feel like this again for any body, to be honest I felt stronger about him then I ever did Brock, I was truly completely in love with him, and I didn't want this to come between us, I blew out a breath hoping I was just being parionod, though something told me I wasn't.