The Truth About Love- Chapter 21
Sorry I haven't updated!! But with homework and moving it's all been sorta crazy. Anyways, thanks Kaleigh, qaz22, Madeleine421, and XxrandomxX for reviews. ^^ And thanks for putting me and favorites Madeleine :)
This chapter is kinda short... and a bit of a cursory job at the end, but I really needed to update and I promise next chapter will be better.
"They're back together." Sherry observed.
"Yeah, it happened last night." Wendy said, slightly regretfully.
"Sorry Wen." Danny said.
She made a face. "He was being a lovesick idiot and wouldn't talk about anything except Kaleigh, so I figured it would just be best if they were back together. But apparently that wasn't the only drama last night. Why didn't you tell us that you and Alicia broke up?"
Sherry dropped her fork. "Wait, what?"
Danny shrugged. "It's not a big deal."
"It isn't?" Sherry was doubtful. Ben and Wendy hastily started a conversation with a confused first year next to them.
"She was honest, and it was a clean break. It's alright." Sherry's eyes searched his, but she already knew this was the truth. He was an honest person, save for exceptional white lies, but she knew he would never lie about something big like this.
"Okay." Sherry finally said. "That's good." She squeezed his hand and then quickly recoiled, nervously pushing a lock of strawberry blond hair away. Sherry blushed and was glad when Ben and Wendy restarted conversation.
. . . .
Angelina stood in the shadow of a large tree and stared at the iron gate of the courtyard. She took a deep breath and pushed it open.
Ben was standing with his back facing her, and didn't hear her enter. Angelina took everything in, the light breeze that seemed to come from different directions, playing with their hair, causing the bell flowers to ring sweetly and blowing her words away—they weren't good enough. The sky was surprisingly clear, for mid December and there wasn't a single cloud obscuring the pale blue blanket. Feeble sunlight made its way down to make an attempt at light.
She gripped the bars of the iron gate until her fingers turned white.
What's wrong with me?
Ben was perfect. He is perfect.
She watched him. The cool breezes were playing with his dark hair and making it so she could see his amazingly blue eyes that always sent electricity down her spine. His pale and chiseled features were flawless, as usual. His hands were in the pockets of his dark washed jeans and the navy blue long sleeved shirt he wore made his eyes stand out. He was standing in place, unmoving as the wind tousled his hair and whispered in his ear.
There was an expression of deep contemplation that graced his immaculate features. She couldn't tell what he was thinking, something was blocking her from entering and for the moment she was glad for that. He looked statuesque, pale chiseled features, casual perfection, and unmoving elegance.
"I can't do this." She whispered softly, meaning for it to be her parting statement. But the wind carried it away as if she had never spoken. Not good enough.
Angelina steeled herself.
"Ben, there's something I need to say." She said.
That was it. No hug, no greeting, just to the point. It felt too cold, and she wanted to take it back, but it was too late for that.
"Okay, go ahead." Ben said. He redirected his gaze.
"I… I don't know how I'm going to say this. This isn't the justice you deserve. I can't do this anymore. It's been—I just— From the beginning, this wasn't it." Her fragments of sentences seemed to fly like bits of broken glass towards Ben only to be blown back to her. Hurt bled from the wounds. "And I…" Angelina struggled for words.
"It's okay." Ben said softy. "I understand."
Angelina shook her head. "No, you don't. Ben, I do love you, you're amazing, you're perfect, just not for me. I'm in love with Fred."
Everything became still. The wind seemed to stop blowing, the sun appeared to pause in mid-glow, and the world felt like it stopped spinning. But with all her words and feelings building up, there was no taking back what she said.
"Ben, I'm so sorry but I—"
"No, don't be sorry." Ben said. "You're not the only one at fault. Taryn and I… If not today, this would have happened sooner or later. Don't blame yourself."
"You don't get it." Angelina said miserably, she was to blame. "I kissed him."
"I'm not standing in your way anymore." Ben said simply. "I'm sorry I made it harder for you."
There was no end to the guilt she was feeling, but she couldn't come up with the right words until he was gone.
. . . .
Katie stood on the edge of the ravine, the wind caressing her body, the sunlight illuminating her face. Her thoughts were swirling around like the playful currents of the wind. Her mind was far from relaxed, but in this place where the space was so large and occupied by only her, everything seemed so much smaller, less important, and she didn't have to worry.
Eyes closed, she was standing on the edge of the cliff, unafraid of the long fall to the bottom or how standing there might provoke unwanted memories. No, it didn't matter there. Those memories were a part of her, they embodied her heart and soul. Here, she could let it all out and instead of weighing her down, the memories flitted in and out, brushing her consciousness like butterfly wings.
With all her memories released to the wind, her secrets whispered to the trees, and all her worries washed away in the river, she was finally at peace. Her body felt light, and if she spread out her arms she felt like she might fly. Fly above all that was happening around her so she might be a spectator watching the world turn. It was much easier to live her life as an outside observer looking in, and for the moment that was possible.
"Hey."
She didn't have to open her eyes to know it was Andrei. She didn't have to ask how he knew where to find her, it just seemed to happen. There was no need to ask what she was thinking about, they both knew.
"Hey." She said, her voice sounding small in the open forest.
Andrei regarded her with his warm golden brown eyes. "You're still thinking about it."
Katie opened her eyes. "Yes."
There was a moment of silence that stretched between them. Katie could tell he wanted to say something. The question was if she wanted to know or not. Normally she might have hesitated, but here, nothing seemed to hurt her. He could say anything he wanted.
"There's something you want to say."
Andrei breathed in slowly. "Yeah." But you don't want to hear it. She could feel the unspoken words that followed his answer.
"Say it."
"Why?"
Katie poked his side. "Because I want to know what you're thinking, silly."
"No, I mean why?"
"Oh." Her hands dropped to her side, all signs of playfulness gone as soon as it had come.
"I'm sorry." Andrei said softly. "I didn't mean to make you upset, I just—"
Katie put her hand on his arm to stop him. "No, it's okay. Sometimes I ask myself that a lot. Why don't I just give up? Or why don't I tell him?"
Andrei listened.
"Well I spent a lot of time thinking about this." She took a deep breath. "I know what will happen if I tell him. We're more than friends, that's true, but not the way I wanted to be." Andrei started to interrupt, but she rushed through. "Wanted. It's not like that anymore. I've accepted that it is what it is and I'm not going to try and change it.
"And as for giving up, I guess I've done that. I'm not going to try and make us more than what we are. I guess I wasn't thinking before, or I would have realized that he does love me, and maybe not the way I thought I wanted, but I wouldn't have it any other way. He's still Fred and I'm still Katie, if I were to make us more we wouldn't be ourselves anymore."
Andrei furrowed his brow, trying to understand what she just said.
Katie watched him and tilted her head. "You don't understand."
"No… not really." But I want to.
It was as if she heard his unspoken thought. "There's a saying 'if you love something let it go; if it comes back to you then it's yours, and if not then it never belonged to you.'"
He had never heard it before, but it was just like Katie to analyze some obscure saying. Katie absently picked a blue flower and twirled the stem in her fingers.
After a moment of silence she continued. "I guess it fits, that if you love someone let them go." She opened her hand and the flower flew off into the air. "If they come back to you then they love you. If not, then maybe it's just not meant to be."
Both of them watched the playful wind currents blow the flower in a circle and twirl it around before a cool breeze sent it sailing back to Katie. She let her hand drop to her side and the flower brushed past her cheek before falling in her hand. She looked at it, unsure of what to do, or what it possibly meant.
Andrei took the flower from her fingers and put it in her hair.
The sudden familiar movement didn't send her spine tingling or her eyes stinging like she thought it might.
She managed a smile. "How do I look?"
"Beautiful."
. . . .
Alicia entered the common room just as George stepped down from the stairs, looking for a specific page in Advanced Potion-Making.
"George!"
"Hey Alicia--" He dropped his book and essay. Alicia had run across the common room and thrown her arms around him. "What was that for?" He asked, blinking.
Alicia giggled. "Come on, I want to show you something." She grabbed his hand and leaving his half-finished essay on the common room floor, they ran out.
"Where are we going again?" George asked as they turned from the staircases.
"Remember a couple weeks ago when I told you that maybe I'd show you my secret passage?" Alicia asked, as they went down an abandoned corridor. It was past nine so they were taking routes the professors were less likely to be patrolling.
"Yes."
Alicia turned and walked down a sloped passage. "Well I'm showing it to you now."
"I thought I was supposed to tell you a secret first."
You already did. "I changed my mind." Alicia answered, checking to see that no one was there before walking down the stairs and across an open corridor.
"Um, Alicia this is a broom closet." George said when they stopped.
"I know." She said, throwing the door open. The two of them squeezed into the small space. Alicia put her hand on the wall. "Ascendio."
Like an elevator, the stone-tiled floor they stood on rapidly rose.
"Hm, I definitely missed this one." George said nonchalantly, despite the limited and near unexistent space between them.
"It's not the only one." Alicia said, as the floor came to a halt.
The wall behind her gave way to shadow. Unthinkingly, they ventured into the passage. Surprisingly, there were no twists or turns to the tunnel and the two of them walked in step, allowing the companionable silence to speak for itself. After a short distance they emerged from the passage, which seemed to materialize into thin air.
"Where are we?" George asked.
Alicia smiled and walked to the edge. "Guess."
George leaned dangerously forward. They were on the platform that stretched between the North tower and the Ravenclaw tower, overlooking the whole Hogwarts campus including the lake, courtyard, and Forbidden Forest. From that vantage point the entire Forest could be seen, all the way to the very edge, which seemed to blend right into the trees of the snow-topped mountains. Beyond that, the ocean shimmered before them.
"This is where I come when I need to get away from everything."
"Were you here… I mean the other day when we were on the Astronomy tower, I thought I saw a shadow."
Alicia nodded. "Yeah."
"What were you thinking about?"
Alicia swayed on the spot. "I can't remember."
"Liar." He said softly.
For some reason this surprised her, even though she already knew that it was lie. Usually he didn't pressure for answers and even if he knew she was lying didn't point it out. It made her wonder if he could somehow read her mind. It was conceivable, she wasn't sure if there was anyone who really knew her better than he did. The whole thing didn't seem fair though, that he subconsciously picked up her thoughts but she couldn't read him anymore.
Alicia sighed. "Okay. You're right. Now what?"
George shrugged. She wondered if it was an I-really-don't-care shrug, or I-wish-you'd-tell-me-the-truth-but-I-can't-make you shrug.
"Do you really want the truth?"
George stared at the night sky. "I don't know. Lies can hurt."
"But the truth can hurt more." They finished together.
Alicia studied his face and wondered if she could really let herself tell him the wholehearted truth. Did she want to? Yes. Was she afraid? Yes. Why, she had no clue. Hadn't he already confessed his feelings? Perhaps out of anguish, but he didn't seem burdened by it anymore. So maybe if she told him, just maybe things might get better.
"So, I guess it's either live a lie or live in denial." Alicia said.
George fixed her green-blue eyes with his hazel. "It doesn't have to be that way."
It felt like for the longest time they stared into each other's eyes and tried to express all the unspoken thoughts they couldn't find the voice to say or put into words. Did he wish they'd stop speaking in single word sentences and riddles? Was last week's conversation still fresh in his mind? Would a single word change their whole relationship? And change… was that good or bad?
All these questions were driving Alicia crazy, and her heart was speeding up; it all came to this.
He leaned forward.
She stopped breathing.
Was this it?
He tore his gaze away.
Hey, happy endings are for the END right?
Anyways, I've actually been planning that Katie scene since.... like the very first chapter I knew I wanted to put it in :D
So... um don't hate me for the end because they're going to kiss eventually... we all know that.
And I know this wasn't the best chapter, but it'd be nice if you'd still review :D