Disclaimer: I do not own Once Upon a Time or its characters or plot ideas. The only things I own in this story are my own ideas and my own characters.

~ Chapter Nineteen ~

I must have fallen asleep sometime after Peter left because the next time I wake up to see that the others are also awake. I pull on the ropes binding my hands together and am pleased when there is no pain and no red marks. I guess Peter wasn't lying about healing me after all.

I turn my attention to Emma and Regina, curious as to why they are staring so intensely at a fire pit that has no fire when I realize Regina is trying to teach Emma how to use her magic. Emma's parents are sitting not too far off, watching as well. Meanwhile my father is nowhere to be seen.

"You're such a pathetic waste of ability!" Regina cries, turning her back on Emma and the fire pit.

"And you're a monster!" Emma counters irritably. However, the anger Emma had must have worked because I notice a small pillar of smoke rising from the once desolate fire pit. I raise an eyebrow, impressed that she managed such a thing.

My father comes back a short time later and has a hushed conversation with David and Mary Margaret. The three of them get to their feet and huddle at the edge of the clearing and I must admit that I'm burning with curiosity. I would love to know what they are talking about. I hate being out of the loop.

I suppose I don't have to wait long to find out because shortly after my father is done talking to David and Mary Margaret he walks over to me, casting a suspicious glance at Emma and Regina who don't seem to notice. "I saw Pan… He told me that Neal is still alive." My father says as he immediately sits down next to me.

I feel my eyes go wide as shock and anger course through me. I can't believe Peter didn't tell me Neal is alive… "He could be lying." I say automatically and my father already starts to shake his head.

"I don't think so. There's evidence that points to him being alive… I talked to David and Mary Margaret; we're going to try to find him before we tell Emma. We don't want to hurt her unnecessarily." He glances around surreptitiously, as if he expects Emma to be standing over his shoulder and listening to his every word.

"Yes, because last thing we want is for dear Emma to be hurt." I roll my eyes and he gives me a sympathetic look.

"I managed to talk them into letting you come. They still don't trust you, but they agree that it will be better to have someone along who knows the island so well." I'm shocked by these words, mostly because I figured they were simply planning to leave me tied to a tree for the rest of my life. "Think of it as a way to redeem yourself."

"Oh I'll do anything if it means I get to sleep lying down tonight." As if my body wants to prove my point, it releases a huge yawn. My father smiles gently and then uses his hook to cut the ropes binding my wrists.

I jump to my feet and immediately stretch as I relish in the feeling of working my muscles. My butt is pretty happy to be off the ground now too, it went numb a long time ago. "Better?" My father asks, laughing at the smile of pure joy on my face. I simply nod my head as I continue to stretch.

"What is she doing untied?" Regina asks, storming over to us. Her hands rest on her hips and she looks ready to tie my sorry butt back to that tree any second.

"I'm taking her for a walk. Stretch her legs… It's not good for her to just sit there the entire time." My father sighs tiredly. "But don't worry, your Majesty. I won't let her do anything dastardly and villainous."

I can't help but laugh when I realize he's mocking the queen. Regina narrows her eyes at the two of us. "If she gets away…" She points her finger at my father, her finger resting just underneath his chin.

He moves out of her pointing finger and rolls his eyes. He doesn't say anything, simply grabs my arm and leads me over to Mary Margaret and David. I notice Emma watching the entire thing suspiciously.

It appears that Mary Margaret and David are already prepared to leave as we reach them. "If we're going to hide this we need a good cover story."

"Got it." Both men say, nodding at one another just as Emma walks up to our group.

"Where are you guys going?" She asks, looking between the four of us rather skeptically.

"Karina needs to stretch her legs." My father says.

"We're getting water." David says at the exact same time. Both men look at one another and my father rolls his eyes.

Emma, not being a complete fool, quickly catches on that the two men aren't being entirely truthful. "Guys, what's going on?"

"Neal's alive." Mary Margaret replies. Immediately, the three of us turn to look at her in shock and annoyance since she clearly doesn't seem to know what a secret is supposed to be. When she notices the three of us staring at her she says, "Sorry, she deserved to know."

"N-Neal… He's… Alive?" Emma whispers, looking dumbfounded by the new information presented to her.

"Maybe!" Mary Margaret quickly interjects.

"This is a waste of time!" Regina exclaims, pointing at all of us. "He's toying with us."

"I don't think so." Mary Margaret gestures towards some bushes, showing that some of the branches are broken. "Look! More scuffling. Someone was definitely resisting."

I'm tempted to point out that there is a good possibility that the person who was resisting could easily be someone who isn't presumed dead. However, I think if I start voicing my pessimistic thoughts I might end up tied to a tree again.

"How do we know that means Neal?" Emma voices my own thoughts.

"Well we know someone was fighting for his life." Mary Margaret once again motions towards the bushes and the tracks in the dirt.

"Are you really going to fall for this?" Regina asks angrily. When Emma doesn't answer she releases a short, harsh laugh that has no humor to it whatsoever. "Fine, you want to follow the evil munchkin's dirt road… Be my guest!" She starts to walk away, pushing me aside as she goes.

I purse my lips and try very hard not to throw one of my daggers at the back of her head. I assume my father must have guessed by thoughts because he shoots me a reprimanding look with a firm shake of his head.

"Where are you going?" Emma asks.

"To save our son!" Regina cries incredulously.

"We need to stick together."

"No we don't. You may be prepared to risk Henry's life over some heartbroken fool's errand but I'm not. I'm tired of waiting around." She shoots all of us nasty looks as if she's daring anyone to argue with her. When nobody says a thing she walks away, right out of the large clearing.

"What if she's right?" Emma turns to her mom. "Pan could be lying."

"Just because something seems too good to be true, doesn't mean it is. Don't give up. You owe it to Henry to find out if his father is still alive and you owe it to yourself." Mary Margaret smiles serenely and I can't help but wonder where she gets all the optimism. Someone who's had so many horrible things happen to her I would expect her to be a little bit more pessimistic about, well, everything. Except she acts like she eats optimism for breakfast.

In the end, Emma makes the decision to go looking for Neal, as I knew she would. Of course, she threatens me a few times, letting me know that she won't be afraid to tie me to a tree and leave me there if I try anything. I assure her I have no intention of doing any such thing and shortly after that our group heads off in search of Neal.

Mary Margaret leads the way since she's the best at tracking, with the rest of us trying to keep up with her fast walking pace. I don't pay much attention to where she's leading us until we actually arrive at the destination. As I look around I start to feel nervous as I realize where we are.

"The tracks lead directly into that cave… This must be where they're keeping Neal." Mary Margaret tells us as she lowers her lantern and inspects the small opening of the cave.

"If this cave is some sort of prison, why aren't there any guards out here to stop us?" David questions as he moves forward to inspect the cave as well.

"Because this cave doesn't need it." I mutter and the others turn to look at me. "This is the echo cave… The only way to rescue someone from inside is to reveal a secret. But not just any secret, it has to be the darkest secret you've got. One that is hidden so deep within yourself, no one else knows it. The echo caves name comes from an old saying, 'the deeper the lie, the more truth in its echo'. The cave demands that you reveal a secret about yourself that you would never admit to anyone… Not even yourself most times. That's the only way you can get out of this cave alive."

"This is ridiculous." Emma exhales angrily. She looks at me as though I'm making everything up.

"Hey, don't kill the messenger. I'm just telling you what I've been told." I raise my hands in self defense.

"Even if we spill our guts, how do we know Neal's still alive in there?" Emma demands as she rests her hand on the wall of the cave.

"Because this is what Pan wants… He's hoping we'll destroy each other with our secrets… I mean, look at you. You're ready to behead me because you found out one of my darkest secrets. Imagine what will happen when all of us start spilling our guts to save Neal." I shrug my shoulders and for the first time since I started my explanation Emma actually appears wary.

"Well, if we're going to do this, let's get it over with." Emma mutters and motions for me to lead the way. I sigh and march into the cave, determined to get through this with as much dignity as possible. They already know one of my darkest secrets; I can't even imagine what else I'm going to tell them.

We barely make it through the entrance of the cave before we've come into a large empty cavern with Neal trapped in a cage at the very centre. There's no way to get across and nothing around that could help us even try.

Emma starts to look sick as she realizes that Neal is in fact alive and not too far away from her. "Emma!" He shouts, his cry echoing through the cave. She winces, taking a step back as she looks around nervously.

"This must be a hundred feet across." Mary Margaret shakes her head.

"Even if we fashion some kind of rope, there's nothing to attach it to. No way to swing over." David looks around, but finds nothing that will help.

"So what do we do?" Emma asks.

"I told you what needs to be done." I sigh, annoyed because I really don't feel like repeating myself. "Consider this the moment of truth… Now, who would like to kick things off? Anyone?"

"So what? Someone tells their secret and they sprout wings?" Emma mutters sarcastically.

"I don't know… Like I said, I told you what I've been told. Though growing wings would be pretty cool." I shrug my shoulders and grin, but no one else seems to find it amusing.

"How do you know it will work?" David asks. Again I shrug my shoulders.

"I guess there's only one way to find out." My father says. Now it's his turn to look sick as he rubs his face with his good hand. "I kissed Emma."

"You what?" David asks angrily at the same time his wife reprimands him. Meanwhile I scrunch up my nose in disgust. Although I'm definitely old enough to be ok with my father kissing someone, that doesn't necessarily mean that I am. He's still my dad and the thought of him kissing anyone kind of grosses me out.

"I already told Mary Margaret, so technically it's not a secret. Besides, it was just a kiss. How is that your darkest secret?" Emma looks at him with confusion.

"It's what the kiss exposed." He says and I briefly wonder if I want to listen to this. "My secret is, I never thought I would be capable of letting go of my first love… Of my Milah. To believe that I could find someone else; that is, until I met you." The two share an intense look which is only broken by the entire cavern shaking as a path suddenly sprouts out in front of us. However, the path is only a small piece and I know that there are many more secrets that need to be revealed in order for it to become fully grown.

Once everyone sees the path they know that I was telling the truth. Mary Margaret tells her secret next, that she wants to have another child. David looks overjoyed, but also sick to his stomach as he finally reveals that he had been poisoned by dreamshade and healed, only to seal his fate to stay on the island forever.

With their secrets the path becomes almost fully grown; however it looks as though it needs one more to be complete. Everyone turns to me and I feel my heart drop. I look at each of them and then point at Emma, "Hey! She can tell a secret, you guys already know mine."

"Somehow, I highly doubt that." David replies bitterly. "Fess up Karina… I think it's time you told us everything." The others nod their heads in agreement, including my father.

That's when the horror sets in as I realize Peter's plan. It hadn't been for us to destroy one another; he doesn't care about any of them. He probably isn't even concerned over Neal. This whole thing was for me. He told me he wanted me to tell them about us, and if I didn't he was going to make me… This is his way of doing just that.

I make the decision in a split second, I try to bolt but my father must have realized it and he lunges for me, grabbing onto me and keeping me in place. "No!" I shriek and start pounding my fists on his arms. He grunts, but he holds onto me, in fact he even tightens his grip. "Let me go! Don't you see? This is what he wants? None of this was for you! It was for me! Let me go!" I start crying as I continue to escape my father's clutches.

All I can think as I try to escape is how I don't want Peter to know. He may think he knows everything, but there's one thing I've kept, even from him. Once he knows it I will have lost all power against him. I'll officially be his plaything again.

"Easy there, love." My father tries to soothe me, but it only has the opposite effect. Finally, I grow tired and stop fighting as tears stain my cheeks.

"Fine, you want to know my last secret?" I demand, knowing I must look feral as I stare the others down in pure rage. "I wasn't just a lost girl, loyal to Pan. I. Was. The. Queen! I was in love with him, so completely in love with him that not only would I kill for him, but I would die for him too. And the worst part? My darkest secret? I'm still in love with him… And I always will be. I love a monster, and I guess that makes me a monster too."

The others stare at me, Emma and her father look angry and disgusted while Mary Margaret looks on with pity. I don't know what my father looks like but his grip on me loosens as the ground shakes again, finishing the path. I force my way out of my father's grasp and land on the floor by his feet, covering my face as I sob uncontrollably.

He's officially won… I have nothing left against him.

I don't even pay attention as Emma rescues Neal but when it's time to leave the cave I refuse to look at anyone as I'm sure my face must be red from crying. Suddenly I feel a hand clasp my shoulder and look up into Neal's brown eyes.

"I heard what you said…" I freeze and expect him to launch into a disapproving rant. However, he wraps his arm around my shoulder. "It's ok to love a monster, and that doesn't make you one. It just makes you human… You can't help who you love." He smiles softly and I can't help but relax into my best friend's embrace.

"He's never going to let me go now." I whisper brokenly.

"I know." That's all he says because that's all he can say. Both of us know there will be no escape for me now. I'm never getting back to Storybrooke.

As the others come out Neal turns to them and thanks them. "Don't thank us yet, we still have to save Henry." David replies.

"We found your star map… Now the question is, can you navigate it to get us home?" My father asks, inspecting him closely.

"If we can find Henry, I can get us home." Neal nods his head, looking determined.

"Then let's go get Tinkerbell and retrieve the boy." Everyone starts to follow my father back down the path from which we came. Only Emma and Neal stay behind as I'm sure they'll want to speak with one another about everything that's happened.

…..

We head back to camp and I'm surprised when no one ties me up again. However, I don't feel like sitting with the rest of them and socialising so I head back to my sleeping bag and curl up into a ball. I feel tears forming in my eyes and I try to desperately to keep them from falling.

After a while my father comes to sit next to me. He doesn't say a word and neither do I. The two of us simply sit in silence as I anxiously chew on my lip. Despite myself, I'm worried about his opinion the most out of everyone. He hates Peter just as much as the others; it can't be easy for him to have a kid who's in love with the enemy.

Finally, after several long minutes my father reaches out and places his hand in my hair, rubbing soothing circles. As though that's all my body needs, the tears start to flow despite my best efforts to keep them at bay.

"Sh, sh, sh…" My father whispers and then tugs on my arm a bit, gesturing for me to sit up. I do so and he wraps an arm around me, pulling me tight to his chest as he places his chin on the top of my head. It reminds me so much of when I was a little girl. I would wake up from nightmares, screaming and my papa would come in and soothe me. Then he would stay with me the entire night, soothing me any time I would get scared.

"I love him, papa." I gasp and wrap my arm around his torso, hugging myself even closer to him.

"I know… And that's ok." That's all he says and that's all I need. I smile softly and tighten my grip even more. The two of us stay in the same position for a very long time, neither of us saying anything else.

….

Much later when the others are sleeping I decide to go face the music. I get up, wiping off my pants and head off into a random direction of the jungle. I know he'll approach me as soon as I'm far enough away. It doesn't matter which direction I go. He'll just use his magic to appear out of nowhere.

Sure enough, he appears in front of me, leaning casually against a tree. I roll my eyes when I see the satisfied smirk stretching his lips back. "Are you happy now?" I ask, throwing out my arms and raising an eyebrow.

"Ecstatic." He replies, turning to look at me and raising his own eyebrows as he slowly approaches me. "I even got dear old dad's blessings." His grin gets impossibly larger and I wish I could smack it off his face.

"I wouldn't go that far." I mutter, rolling my eyes again.

Suddenly Peter grabs my waist and pulls me towards him until I'm flush against him. "Once this is all over you and I will be together. Forever." Before I even get a chance to respond he crashes his lips to mine, tangling his fingers in my hair. I clutch his shoulders, eagerly accepting his assault on my mouth. He bites my bottom lip, causing me to gasp and giving his tongue full access to my mouth. My hands travel up to his hair as he pulls away and starts to kiss along my jawline and then down my neck. He moves his hands down to my butt, slapping it before pushing me up against a tree.

I lean my head back against the tree and close my eyes and smile. Peter releases a feral growl and then uses his hand to roughly bring my head back up and crash his mouth to mine again. I must admit that being in his arms again is something I've been missing desperately. So much so that it has left a huge aching hole in my chest.

A part of me doesn't want it to end but I know I can't be gone too long or I run the risk of someone waking up and discovering me gone. I place my hands on his chest and push him away. "Ok, easy there… I need to get back."

"I'm going to kill them all." Peter says suddenly and I freeze. "Not only am I going to kill them for trying to come against me, but also for the way they have treated you."

"Peter…" I try to interject.

"Just because you've admitted your feelings, it doesn't change how this is going to end… I'm still going to win and everyone who has come up against me will be dead… Well, everyone except you." He starts to caress my cheek but I slap his hand away.

"Peter, you have to let them all go. If you kill any of them, including Henry, I won't be able to forgive you." I growl, stabbing his chest with my index finger.

He narrows his eyes and I see the anger set in. "You know why I need Henry… Besides, you don't really have a say in what is about to happen. You're still on the enemy's team. All you have done today is granted yourself immunity from the fun I have planned for the others."

"Peter…" I say warningly.

He leans forward and pecks my lips quickly. "Sweet dreams." Then he disappears.

A/N: Well, that was an eventful chapter. Haha, I hope everyone liked the chapter. I'm interested to hear your thoughts.

Please take a moment to review!