Disclaimer: I don't own Durarara! or it character. All original characters are of my own design and creation.
A/N: I apologies in advance for the delay in updating. I got distracted and needed to take a small break. Plus, I wasn't sure if I wanted to keep this chapter, but eventually conceded. More, slightly, AU. Just giving you a heads up so no one is surprised. Well, by that anyway...
It had been a very long night. Between school, the Slasher, and learning the headless rider was indeed headless Anri was worn out. But her body was still too riled to lie down and rest. So instead she just sat on the edge of her bed, thinking about her life and her day in an endless circle until her doorbell chimes through the apartment and her thoughts.
"Is that…Celty?" She asks herself, finding the late hour odd for visitors.
The young girl shuffles towards the door and attempts to see who it is through the peep hole. But she can't. The corridor is dark and her guest is shrouded in shadows. So the only logical, idiotic thing to do was open the door.
"Excuse me, who are you?" Anri asks the smirking black hair woman she doesn't know at her door.
"Hello…little rabbit."
The door is pushed open by the guest's hand and Anri stumbles back from the sudden force. "W-who are you?" She stammers again from the floor as the inky haired visitor grins down at her with an almost manic gaze.
"Me? I'm Vitalia. I'd ask for your name, but I really don't care." She replies, waltzing in as if she owned the place.
"V-Vitalia?" Anri questions and the older woman seems to get a chuckle out of her trying to pronounce the Italian name.
"Do you like my name? I gave it to myself. My old name was so boring! This one means vital of life. I think it's more fitting." Vitalia replies as though she is very proud of herself for no reason.
But Anri is still frightful of this intruder with the manic smile. "Y-you shouldn't be here. Please leave."
Her quaking demand falls on deaf ears and another chuckle. "I am from a much higher plain of existence and far too advanced to be chained by the rules of lesser beings. And I'd rather stay." Vitalia crouches down so that she is now eye level with the younger brunette. Anri tries futilely to gain space between them but, on the floor and against the fall, she has nowhere to run as Vitalia's crimson eyes look at her in scrutiny. "So you're where my prize has been hiding. All these years and it hasn't made a peep. That says something about you. Maybe you aren't such a lesser being." She says, caressing the younger girls cheek in an affection it manner.
"W…What are you doing? Please get off of me!" Anri pleads. Her head making a loud thud sound when it snaps away and back into the wall.
Vitalia just laughs again with a soft smile. "Even in the face of mortal danger you're still so polite. Maybe you are a lesser being for caring about such trivial things." She ponders aloud and Anri's eyes go wide. "Ah, I see you caught that part. Yes, you see you have something that belongs to me. Or rather, it should belong to me. So I've come to take its burden from you. Now why don't you be a good little rabbit and hand it over. Or I can't rip it from you with your spine." Her threat is added ferocity with her sneer and a long, pale hand clasped around the girl's throat.
Anri's eyes twist shut in fear but when they snap open they glow red with purpose. Saika manifests in her hand and she strikes in blind will to survive. But the blade doesn't reach its target. It stops in midair, like its hit a wall, near the smirking raven haired girls face.
"So this is Saika then? Funny, I thought it would be…bigger." Vitalia says, running her finger down the flat side of the blade in something a keen to a caress until she reaches the hilt. "Let go now little rabbit. Hand it over to me."
Anri doesn't want to. But something is forcing her to comply. She tries to keep her grip on the blade. Saika shakes with the force of her will to hold on, but her hand seems to have a will of its own and releases the blade.
"Very good little rabbit! Don't worry; I'll take very good care of my new blade." Vitalia says with a twisted grin that sends chills down Anri's spine before she's suddenly being pinned down, her limbs stuck to the wall. Her throat is constricted so she can't scream. But Vitalia isn't touching her anymore. She's moved back on to her heels as if to appreciate her prey bound before her by invisible arms holding her down. It's as if her eyes have crucified her to the wall. "And since you did such a good job keeping Saika safe for me, I've decided not to kill you; as a token of my gratitude. However," now she leans down and Anri shivers as it feels like snakes are crawling over her with her words before another thud sounds through the apartment. Louder than the last time and Anri slumps limp to the ground. "I can't have you telling that Celty person that I have this or anyone else right now. What would be the fun in that? My triumphant scene would be over before it began!" Vitalia preaches to no one, as though some grave injustice had been done, before looking back at the sword the shouts unheeded words of desperate love in her mind. "Now…let's take this baby for a spin."
Shizuo doesn't ask where they're going, but Celty seems to know where they're headed. It the dead of night Shooter sprints back across the city to Ikebukuro and they eventually stop at South 'bukuro Park.
It's quite and empty.
Then crowd begins to gather around them. And not just a small crowd either. A sea of glowing red eyes floods that park like the tide is coming in.
Shizuo's spine itches with that odd feeling he gets when the Slasher or Celty is around. That feeling he can't explain when something not right or of this world is around. He also has that gut feeling he gets when Izaya is around. Which is bad, because usually when he gets it it means something bad is about to happen.
"I've been looking for you, Shizuo Heiwajima." A ganguro* girl, who looks in her senior year of high school, says as she steps forth from the crowd. "You really are wonderful. Just like mother says. Everyone here knows that you are the one that defeated our sisters. Gotta love the internet." She deadpans with a grin.
Shizuo isn't sure what she's talking about. He's beaten up a lot of people but he does remember beating up any girls. Maybe it was a general term? That guy he crushed with Kyohei's door for ranting about how he loved him had red eyes like her. He does feel kind of bad about that, but with everything going on he was not in the mood to hear someone say that they love him.
"At first it was difficult for our collective conscious to adjust and learn your human language. But now, our minds are just as well formed as our mothers." She continues before smiling madly with a swinging around a butterfly knife that appears in her hand. "Now come on Shizuo! Show everyone here just how strong you are! We're so looking forward to loving you! And neither that monster or the cops can stop us. They'll be way too busy for that! You see this night is just getting started! Because not too far from here, my sisters are out making more sisters! Now how much fun is that?" She crows with an evil grin on her face.
Shizuo dismounts the bike calmly stares and walks towards her and the crowd. Behind him, Celty's shadows form her scythe, ready to strike. He doesn't seem to notice though. Doesn't seem to really care. He just continues to come closer to the crowd until he stops and says, "Can I ask you something?"
"Whatever you'd like?" The possessed girl replies softly, almost gently.
"Why me? Why do you like me so much?"
"'Cause you're so strong." She says still with that odd twisted smile. "Your strength literally has no boundaries. And we would like it for ourselves. All the better to love humanity with. We like someone with good genes the same way you humans do." She explains and Shizuo narrows his eyes at her. "Come on now. Let's just be honest. Odds are a guy like you would never find someone to love him. Except us. We want to love you. Every single one of us."
Shizuo there is a long, tense pause as if the blonde seems to consider her words before he suddenly breaks out into a fit of laughter at the crowd and Celty becomes concerned.
:Shizuo snap out of it! If things get out of control I'll take care of it! Ok?:
"No, Celty, That laugh was real. I'm kinda glad about this." He tells her and Celty's head tilts in confusion. "You don't have any idea how much I've hated having this power. I've always been afraid that because of this, no one would ever want me." He confesses, but is smiling. "But I was wrong. And for the first time I get to tell someone that they're wrong. Someone does love me. And her name is Nausika Yumi." He said in almost a triumphant manner before he smiles fondly. "I just think it's funny that apparently the only people who can love me are people who can kill. What do you think's that says about me?"
The lead girl suddenly sneers and the crowd seems to follow. "That girl. That human! She doesn't deserve your love! We do! She was selfish and greedy! She wants to keep you for her alone! Is that what you want?! Someone selfish with their love?!"
"Yeah, actually, I do. Because I'm selfish and greedy with hers." Shizuo tells her plainly. "And I'll be damned if I'm gonna let any of you psychos or anyone else touch her again!" Shizuo hisses angrily and the crowd seems to collectively take a step back as he removes his sunglasses. "And by the way, I just want to make one thing clear, none of you are my type! Never have been, never will be! I hate you guys! Almost as much, as Izaya!" The blonde roars and then charges into the crowd at full force, unaware that this fight will be much different than the ones he's faced before.
"Ooooow goddamn it!"
"Don't make a fuss."
"Good lord, you act like you've never had a broken arm before."
"Fuck you two! My arm is broken in half in two places!" Not to mention a rib or two. Many more are bruised in an unseemly fashion, but Dakota and Nausika aren't swayed by Cowboy's plight or shouting.
"I still don't see how a woman that size could do something like this." Shinra comments off handedly as he secures the wrappings around the other male's chest. Nausika had told him everything, within reason, as to why she was bringing an injured man to his doorstep in the middle of the night. And unfortunately, one of those reasons was a petite crazy telepath would had thrown the victim into a wall.
"You ever seen the movie Carrie? Imagine if she practiced." Nausika mutter, while scratching the back of her head.
Dakota nods from her perch on an adjoining table. She had showed up not long ago after Nausika had called. She explained what happened, and told Dakota to salt* the room before coming over. And she was confident in the brunette's abilities to do so, because if there was one thing Dakota was good at it was making sure it looked like she was never there.
"That still seems rather hard to believe. A real live telekinetic? Really?"
"Shinra: you live with a headless Irish fairie, who's been looking for a demonic sword with your super human strength friend, and I am a living breathing etch-a-sketch who's brought two assassins to your door. Have a little faith." Nausika rationalizes.
"Hmmm….I suppose."
"D, I'm not that high right now am I? You heard headless too right?" Cowboy asks the other new comer after the exchange. Dakota just nods again calmly.
"Speaking of which, you should be getting some rest now. All this yelling and carrying on will just aggravate your injuries." Shinra rationalizes before administering a mild anesthetic to his IV. Cowboy makes an effort to protest, but once Shinra's opened the valve in his line, he can only grumble in a slur before he passes out.
"Can I have some of that for when we leave?" Dakota deadpans in a tone that makes the others chuckle.
Nausika gives her a small wave, to which the brunette juts her chin at in understanding, before she heads into the living room with the doctor on her heels.
"He should be fine. It'll take a bit for him to be 100% again, but he's in no real danger." Shinra tells her cheerfully once they reach the living room.
"Thank you for your help Shinra. I'll…I'll make it up to you." The blonde promises over her shoulder at him, a look of deep regret in her eyes.
"You worry too much. Your friend isn't the first hit man I've stitched up. My line of work isn't exactly on the up and up either." He tells her while taking a seat on his couch.
"You seem so calm about this. About everything…." Nausika tells him, staring at her hands laced on her knees when she joins him cautiously.
Shinra smiles softly and places a hand over her tightly clasped ones. "You're a good person Nausika. That's all I need to know. What's important now is that you've left that life behind and began again. The past is the past and we've all made choices we've regretted at one time or another. I'm not going to hold it over your head."
"I'm sure most people don't have the regret of near mass murder on their conscience."
"No, I'm sure they don't." Shinra agrees with a chuckle. "You know, he'll understand too. You don't have to worry." Nausika's head snaps up from her lap to look at the calm, smiling doctor. "Shizuo loves you. Anyone can see that. I'm sure that right now, he's confused but he'll come around." He says, seeming to mistake her concern for matters as concern for how Shizuo would feel about all this. It was an understandable mistake. Her apprehension to discuss the taller man in any regard would lead someone to believe that he was the problem.
"What if…I don't want him to come around?" Shinra's face shifts into an expression off taken aback as the blonde again looks at her hands seriously. "I'm poison Shinra. People die or end up worse than they started when they're around me. They always have. I can't…I can't let that happen to him. Shizuo he…he's so good to me. He's kind and thoughtful and caring. He makes me feel like a real person you know. Not just a freak or a product or an asset. And I love him. But maybe that's not enough. It's not enough to keep him safe." She explains painfully then pinches the bridge of her nose with her forefingers. "Maybe it would be better for everyone if I just left."
Shinra opens his mouth to disagree but his protests are quickly cut off when his phone beeps loudly in his pocket. "Oh no!"
"What? What is it?!" Nausika asks in alarm at the outburst from Shinra.
"Saika's army is apparently attacking Shizuo in South Ikebukuro Park." Shinra explains fretfully after reading the message sent form Celty.
The blonde's brow furrows. "Saika's army? The sword has an army?"
Shinra looks up from his phone and sighs while nudging up his glasses. "Sort of, it's complicated. Perhaps 'army' is the wrong word. Maybe children is a better description. But Saika's wish is to spread its 'love' into people. When a person is cut, its influence then spreads into the people, making them possessed as well and forced to do its bidding."
"So the sword told these people to kill Shizuo?!" Nausika questions frantically as she shoots up from the couch.
But Shinra shakes his head, still remarkably calm. "I doubt that's Saika's intent. It wants to love, not kill. And I don't think it really cares who it impresses it's 'love' into. The current possessor of the original probably had that idea on specific targets controlling the others. The people are more like knife wielding puppets to make more knife wielding puppets."
Nausika's eyes snap wide and her face pales as a quiet, whispered "Holy shit…." escapes her mouth before she's leaps over the couch for the door.
"Wait Nausika! When a person is cut their knives become another Saika! Wait!"
Shizuo fights on and on but opponents keep coming. If he knocks down five, six more stand up. He doesn't seem hindered by this though. In fact he seems to be enjoying it.
Not far away, in the parks cluster of trees, a cat like brunette lounges lazily amongst the branches; yawing loudly as she surveys the scene.
"Aaaaa! This is getting boring." Vitalia says with moan. "I thought this would be much easier than this. I'm severally disappointed in this swords ability to only control lesser beings. Why the hell would I want them?" She asks the sword, as if it would actually speak to her, but all she gets in return is the echoing sounds of love that try to reach her mind and heart but can't. "Hmmm…I suppose if you want something done right."
"You get within ten feet of him and I'll put a bullet in your skull!"
Vitalia's eyes widen and flinch to the left before she skitters out of her tree just as a shot rings out in the dark.
"Well, well, look who finally decided to show up. You've become a terrible shot in your retirement by the way." The dark brunette crows with a smirk as her blonde attack steps forward, gun draw on her form.
"It was the courtesy of a warning shot, Vitalia. Stop this now!"
"Stop what?" Vitalia replies like a child caught under the eye of their parents and trying to play dumb with stolen cookies in their hand.
"You know what! You should have given up this ridiculous idea of controlling people after both Rico and Chidori told you no. Call them off!" Nausika demands angrily.
But her threat and wrath are only met with mirthful laughter. "I'd rather not. Though they are slow and dumb like cattle they do sever their purpose. I mean, eventually, if I can't get Plan A to work then Plan B will do just fine."
"Plan B?" The taller woman asks, though fearful of the answer.
Vitalia, however, seem all but giddy to reply. "Plan A was to have Saika's puppets slash my will into him and then I was going to have him use his impressive, freakish, wonderful strength to crush your head like a grape. I thought it was a wonderfully simplistic plan that could do the most damage emotional as well as physically." She says with that maddening crazed smile of hers while tapping Saika against her shoulder as if reminiscent of the thought. "But since beloved Shizuo seems to be of a higher state of being than originally anticipated me thinks I'm just going to have them just cut him into ribbons. Less brilliant, but still effective."
Nausika's face slates cold with anger and she fires again. But the bullet gets stuck in the air before it can reach its target, then falls limply to the ground. The brunette looks at it, then back at its original owner in a bored manner. "Really? This song and dance? Isn't this a bit played Tokyo? We've done this routine before." Vitalia drones critically before her hand flies forward. Nausika braces herself for the force she knows is coming but still can't keep her weapons that are batted away by the invisible smack and scatter away; too far for her to recover without turning her back on Vitalia, a fatal flaw by any means.
Though her opponent is disarmed, the dark haired pixie seems less than pleased with the result. "Oh, right, Chidori's shield is still up. I can't throw you." She says with a sneer before sighing heavily in inconvenience. "Oh well, I guess Plan B will have to work for everything today." Vitalia's inky black hair flares for a moment and Nausika is taken off guard when a large stone trash can crashes into her side like a runaway car, throwing her in its trajectory into the center of the park and its crowd.
"What the hell?!" Shizuo shouts looking wildly over his shoulder as someone comes crashing into the stone courtyard like a meteor before his face balks in surprise. "…Nausika?" He questions, turning around fully as he recognizes the yellow jacket but in disbelief that she's here. The limp form slowly comes up and Nausika's face twist in a grimace as her jaw and body resets. 'What is she doing here?! She can't be here! These freaks will carve her to pieces with those knives!' "Nausika!-" Shizuo attempts to warn her to leave but a carving knife suddenly cuts him off when it slice into his turned back and he roars painfully back at his attacker.
"Shizuo!" Nausika cries, shooting up into a crouch at the sound of his cries, roused by his voice originally. The couple shares a look across their respective battle fields, seeming unsure and unbelieving of this odd awful twist their lives have turned..
"Eyes on your own fight pretty boy!" Vitalia warns in midair as she leaps through the air at her prey, ready to bring Saika down and through the blonde, but is blocked suddenly by a katana on her own.
Vitalia's crimson eyes narrow as they struggle at their cross. At another time, when she is not in the middle of a fight, she will remember to be bothered by the idiocy of her new minions for bringing a katana when apparently a kitchen knife would do. But for now, she will marvel in the excitement of being in a samurai-esque fight with her mortal enemy like the movies on the big screen do.
"Nausika!" Shizuo cries again and tries to get to her. But his path his suddenly blocked by a sea of red eyed monsters and their glittering sharp objects. They encroach on him slowly, boxing him in and away from her.
"I'm fine! Handle them!"
The bodyguard's head perks up over the crowd at the sound of Nausika's voice, unafraid and deadly serious, before he turns back on to the crowd with a murderous smirk and new found purpose. "Ahhhhh!"
Nausika smirks at the sound of Shizuo's cry that spurs her own blood and kicks out at Vitalia's feet, knocking her back, before she rolls away. The two assassins duel furiously near, but outside of the possessed crowd. Vitalia doesn't seem to care in the least about the people, willing to spin around this person or that as a shield and making Nausika kick at or bat them away with the flat of her own sword. Their blades spark and clash loudly when they connect. But Vitalia notices something…odd about their fight.
"You're not fighting like you normally do. Dodging and blocking the instead of facing it? Pour quoi ma chère*?" Nausika says nothing as she grits her teeth at Vitalia, who merely tilts her head to the side before flinching her blade in a quick flash against her neck, causing the blonde to hiss and snap away. "Ho, ho, ho! Oh, this just keeps getting better and better!" The petit woman cries with wide eyes and a smile of glee as she sees the blood from the small cut flow down her neck as the wound refuses to close. "I never dreamed that I would have a weapon that could actually kill you in my hands. I'm the luckiest girl in the world."
And like a child that's received everything they've ever wanted from Santa on Christmas, Vitalia dashes towards Nausika with an obvious new goal in her eyes.
Not far away from the battling assassins, Shizuo continues to punch and kick through the endless flood of people wanting to love him. "Oh no! What's that crazy witch doing?!" He thinks out loud as Vitalia's cackling reaches his ears and then screams as another knife cuts deep into his arm, sending its wielder flying. At one point, he stumbles to the ground. The crowd pounces on him like lions on a gazelle to devour them with their rows of knives like teeth.
"What happened? We've carved your love into him, why hasn't he changed?!"
"Once he's been cut he'll open up to us."
"Our minds will flow into him. Into his pain and fear…it's just a matter of time."
"What? Shizuo Heiwajima feels no fear…?"
The crowd chatters in an eerie echo, but Shizuo pays them no mind as he charges forward.
His fists blow them away as it hits the ground, the force of it sending the possessed puppets soaring it all sorts of directions.
'Look, you bastards got it all wrong. You guys think that no one will ever love me because they'll always be scared of me. That's ridiculous! She…she wasn't scared of me. Hell I was more scared of her. You see the one who's scared is me. I'm always afraid that I'll lose control and then screw everything up! She was always nice to me, even before I fell in love with her. Maybe I always was? I thought she was too good for me, but now….No, you know what? No she's not perfect or normal and is a real pain in the ass right now, but you know what, she's mine! And you know what? There's no way I'm goin' down, in front of the people who love me.'
'Shizuo!' Nausika thinks, hearing the scream and worried for the worst. He's not like her, and with this enemy it wouldn't much matter. A man can die from a thousand paper cuts. Eventually, all those cuts will add up and become a problem. 'Please don't die before I have a chance to fucking apologies!'
"You still seem distracted." Vitalia's voice cuts through her thoughts and Nausika's teal eyes snap back to her opponent wielding an impressive frown. "It's no fun if I can finally kill you and you're not even worried about your pathetic life enough to be fearful of it." Nausika says nothing, but the brunette still seems to receive some sort of answer. "Hm, I see. Then allow me to get rid of your distraction."
Ruby lips twist into another crazed grin before her hair flares wildly. The ground under Nausika's feet quake and she's thrown back by the cracked, destroyed pavement. "Nausika! Hey, wh-What the hell?!" Shizuo shouts, fearfully for Nausika but suddenly alarmed as he feels a pull through his chest and he's dragged off his feet across the courtyard to land on his knees in front of Vitalia.
The blonde looks up in surprise at the dark pixie silhouetted in street light that make her red eyes shine as he realizes he can't stand. He can't move. It's like his knees have been bolted to the ground and the rest of him chained heavily to the bolts. "It's been real fun, but unfortunately this is where our story ends." Vitalia says sweetly before her smile turns murderously crazed and she raises Saika poised to run him through. "Goodbye, Shizuo Heiwajima!"
Shizuo's face balks in fear before his eyes close in expectation of the stab.
He hears what he thinks is the sound of the katana running something through, followed by the wet sound of what he guesses is blood splatting the ground.
But…there's no pain.
'Did I die instantly? No, I'm still breathing. So what….?' Shizuo ponders quietly as his eyes slowly reopen before they widen at the sight of a sword tip near is nose. He stumble back off his knees in a start, then his face blanches in terrified surprise as he sees why it's stopped so suddenly.
"N…Nausika….."
Her tall, lean frame fills his vision and that iconic yellow jacket stained with an ever growing red bull's-eye the sword has jousted through fills his vision. The blue highlighted blonde pants heavily for a moment, a task rather difficult with a sword through her body, before she grits her teeth and then, with shaking hands, she grips the blade. She seems ignorant to how her hands bleed around the sharp sword and its maddening record of love as she pulls it out of her. Vitalia's hands fly away from Saika's hilt as if Nausika's touch as set it ablaze, her face just as wide eyed as Shizuo. Like the thought of this outcome had never crossed her mind.
Nausika's throat chokes on a gasp as the sword is pulled free then, after a moment, flips the blade so the hilt is in her hands. "Plan B…" The blonde raises Saika in preparation to strike, but just as it gets over her shoulder her eyes flutter and Saika falls from her grasp as she and plummets to the ground with a loud clatter.
"Nausika!" Shizuo snaps into action, catching the injured blonde before she hits the ground. "Nausika, Nausika! No, no, no! Oh God…Why?! Why would you do that?!" Shizuo demands frantically as he holds her. Blood gushes everywhere. It reminds him of the table. But unlike last time, the wound won't close. And the blood keeps coming and coming.
Nausika scoffs a little with a smile as she looks up at Shizuo. "Because it was going to hit you…. Stupid." Shizuo's face falls before he smiles painfully back at her as he remembers that had been her answer when she had saved him from the car. "Vitalia…."
Shizuo's eyes snap wide and he looks around. "Gone, she's gone, I don't-"Shhh…don't worry about it. If she's not here, she's long gone. It's not important." Nausika interjects softly with a smile, looking up at Shizuo fondly. "Your roots are coming back."
Shizuo laughs a little, thinking it's funny that she's worried about that at a time like this. "Then you'll have to dye it for me again, yeah."
Nausika scoffs and nods slowly. "Yeah…I have to make it up to you…for being such a bitch…" Her voice trails off as her eyes fall closed and her body falling limp in his arms.
"No, no, no! Nausika, stay wake!" Shizuo says in a panic while shaking her in his arms to try and wake her up. "Come on stay wake! We'll get you to Shinra's. He'll fix you up it'll be ok. It'll be ok. It'll be ok." Shizuo's vision blurs for some reason as he continues to shake her but stops suddenly as he sees she's not waking up. "Nausika…" His vision blurs heavily before it clears quickly, hot wet tears sliding down his face.
The spellbound broken crowd slowly hoards around them, confused as to why they're here and what's going on and why grown man is bawling like an idiot in South Ikebukuro Park.
So this was really fun. I'm glad everyone enjoyed reading this story. Special thanks to , flyfly246, and gzillafan for reviewing last time and everyone that faved/followed previously.
Thanks for reading!
Also, new chapter for Side Stories is up!
*-Derived from the phrase 'salt the earth'. Meaning to leave no trace of live or possibility of it in the future.
*ganguro is an alternative fashion trend among young Japanese women. Girls tan or fake tan their skin, bleach or dye their hair blonde, pink or silver, and wear very loud colorful make up. Some speculate that the trend is to emulate American women, but there is no real proof of that (especially since no one looks like that in the States).
* Pour quoi ma chère- translates from French to 'why my dear?'