Mysteryisgr8-girl: Congratulations on figuring out it was him!
Twilight Addict For Life: I know she doesn't like to be given gifts but I'm still working on if I'm going to let it stay with the Bella in this story since it turns out that the 'admirer' will be showering her with gifts in the near future. And I hope this isn't a spoiler but… about the part with what you said about Jacob? Please don't hate me for what I'm going to do this chapter, is all I'm saying. It's all part of the plan.
XxMizz CutiexX: I'm not sure though I'm estimating it will reach 30+, I think. I doubt it would reach 40 but like I said, I'm not sure.
Cullen0-Lover-101 and BellaSwan1994: I hope this is quick enough. I got stuck with the confrontation part so it might not be good.
Vampiregurl: I feel jealous of Bella too whenever I think of it. LOL. And I do hope you stick to what you said when you told me that you like the surprises, cause the surprise twist in this chapter might make some readers hunt for me with burning torches in their hands (I hope you wouldn't be included in that riot because I would be hunting for myself if I hadn't been the one typing it).
Rpattz granny: It was; you'll see how it happened here.
Bookworm19065: Yup, you were right. Congratulations!
Wrighthangal: I know it IS a bummer. Bella has meds for it though so it's nothing to worry about… or is it?
Bmkgreen, vhawk730, greenfairyrose, sophierosecullen, MissCyrs and Alexis999: Here's the next part!
Brebree2010: You're right; it is uh-oh. I wonder how Edward will react.
DoubleAgentA, Megan84, xxcharlie93xx, kaytlinJane and cyn23: Thank you. I hope that this was soon enough.
x TWILIGHT x OBSESSED x: There IS a lock but then you have to remember who had the box at the last time. If you don't get it, you'll see how it happens at this chapter.
Loves to read: And he will not learn it from Bella when she's angry. I'm not sure it all will like it though, I'm having doubts.
Bookworm0902: Who am I to be able to resist a reader's plea? This didn't reach two weeks, right?
Unikenzie: We'll see about it.
MoBiTwilightLover: Congratulations for figuring it out!
Gabs9: And thank you for the review!
Crazyhypervampiregurl, sprinter1 and Abby-Swan: We'll see…
J3LLY83AN: Congratulations for getting both of those things! And you're right; those two should talk to each other if they want to know the truth. It's like both of them has the half of the story and they should just talk to complete the story… which I did but I'm not sure it came out to my liking. Love your penname, by the way!
ExB InTeRtWiNeD fOrEvEr: No, her start-of-the-year sickness started since her childhood.
Help-me-think-of-a-name: A little? I thought it was a tad bit too much. Congratulations for getting your guess right, by the way.
Akadabra-kaching: It does have a lock so how will he open it? Read on to find out! And be careful of what you say, the climax in this chapter might make you… I dunno… annoyed? Irritated?
sPunkY sTeLLar: Yeah, the parts I remembered the most where the ones with Jacob in it. When he removed his shirt, I was saying, "Oh my…" It's a good thing I'm Team Switzerland so I wouldn't have to choose between the two.
Twi-Hard1676: I'm not the type to say this since it's a spoiler but since it's happening in this chapter, I might as well tell you, "How did you know?" I'm not saying that you got everything correct but you hit one right on target. You're a pretty good guesser since you're the only one who figured it out, out of all those who reviewed. Wow.
A/N: This might be my longest chapter ever. Woo-hoo! And an early update as well! Double the thrill! Double the fun!
So this is the second part of the last chapter and like I said this is where the action happens for that last chapter. By the way, the confrontation between Edward and Bella didn't come out to my liking because I just got over a mental block. Hope everyone forgives me for that.
And by the way, the quote from the admirer down below is not from me, it's from Erica Jong so don't sue me!
Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it. It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don't risk anything, you risk even more.
Erica Jong
Chapter Twenty-One
Reason Twenty-One: This may sound unbelievable but… I'm having doubts about Edward. I starting to think that he's not that bad…
EPOV
The box was ordinary: the kind which could easily be bought at any gift shop but it wasn't the box itself which caught my attention. It was the padlock on it. I wondered the value of the box's contents that the owner had to place a lock on it to keep it safe from prying eyes like mine. Even though I knew that trying to open the box was futile, I gave the lock a jerk anyway.
And the lock gave way.
Somehow, miraculously, incredibly; the lock didn't have a firm hold on the box. Maybe the owner was in a hurry when they were last checking the contents or maybe… they didn't check to see if the lock was still secure. Maybe they hadn't anticipated that someone- namely, I –may just happen to drop an important contract which would lead to the box's discovery.
I'm familiar with the term 'private property,' of course. I've lived long enough to understand and value the importance of it: from well-kept secrets in diaries to confessions in love letters. I try to keep my distance from it and I've never had any trouble from doing it before… until I saw the box. There was just this phantasmagorical pull calling me towards it.
I'm not sure though. Maybe I was just making up excuses so that I could open the box. Or maybe there really was this cosmic pull. Or maybe this was serendipity.
Whatever it was though, I made up my mind, lifted the lid and looked inside…
Letters.
The box was filled with dozens of letters. Most of it was dated from eight years ago; the most recent was five months ago but the similarities of the letters were prominent at the first glance. All of these letters were addressed to me and all of them were written by Bella.
And this is the part when I made my decision easily without feeling the guilt I felt earlier when I opened the box. The box didn't belong to me and that's why I was feeling a bit unease when I opened it to survey its contents. The letters, though… that was a whole different matter. The letters belonged to me; it had my name on every single one of it. I have a right to read these letters even though they were kept hidden from me for who-knows-what reason.
I took a random envelope and read the letter with an air of intrigue:
Edward,
Nothing much happened this month.
I still keep dreaming about EJ but that's old news. I've been trying to get over the lost of him but trying to forget a memory- no matter how short the time was that you got to know it, if its significance was still huge- when the time comes to let it go, it's close to impossible to do it. Trust me; I can call myself an expert on this. After all, it's already taken me a psychiatrist and my parents' advices and I'm still nowhere near to moving on.
These days are dark for me Edward. The only comfort I have is writing you these letters even though I don't send them to you. I feel like after I wrote you a letter, I'm left with only half a burden than before. Isn't it ironic that I'm writing to you though? Think about it; you started this when you made a bet and then you chose not to defend our relationship to your friends. If it weren't for you, I wouldn't have been so distraught when I crossed that street the night of that party and maybe the accident could have been avoided and I'd feel happy. I could easily imagine both of us still together with a brown-haired, green-eyed baby in my arms. Ah, such blissful thoughts… if only it could be real.
Tell me, is it wrong for me to still believe that that kind of thing might happen? Should I let go of being a mother so early in life? Just because I had been careless for one moment, am I really not allowed to have another chance again?
But I should stop this! Dr. Williams warned me against having this kind of foolish thoughts. It does nothing to me but make it much harder for me to move on. I shouldn't dwell on these things so I'll proceed to the reason why I wrote you this letter.
I heard Tanya finally gave birth to a baby girl last night. Congratulations! I'm wishing for Tanya's well-being. I read that childbirth takes a toll on the pregnant woman; I hope it hadn't been too hard for her. And also, I wish you the best of luck with your baby. I hope you find your happiness even though I will not ever find mine. I'm sorry about EJ again. I should have taken better care of him.
By the way, how are you? I've been busy studying here. I added one subject in my curriculum just for fun. I'm studying French and Italian so that I could communicate internationally when I inherit my company. So far, my grades are stable. I hope yours is as well.
I've reached the end of this letter.
Until next time,
Bella
After I read the letter for the first time, I stared blankly at it. Days might have passed or even months but I didn't care; I was still in a state of shock. I think I'm having my first out-of-body experience; I was feeling a bit dizzy and I don't think I can move my body if I willed it to at that time. It was too much to absorb and it had only been one letter.
Why was Bella dreaming about this EJ person when he was supposed to be her friend? Why is she apologizing to me for this EJ? And the thing which confused me most is why- and how -was motherhood taken from her?
Do I dare to read more from the box?
I can't control my thirst for information anymore. I have to know. This was what Bella had been hiding from me. A box of letters and some mementos.
Confused, I took out the other letters and read the remaining ones. And when I was done reading each one of it, I don't know how to describe what I was feeling.
I thought Bella hated me but it was clearly written on the first letter that I drive her 'crazy'; that was the word she used, I drive her crazy. For eight years, I've been unknowingly driving my wife 'crazy'; strapping her on mypersonal-made roller coaster and giving her the most confusing ride of her life.
Was that supposed to be a good or a bad thing?
"Edward, we're nearly late for work." Bella walked in, interrupting my train of thought.
I looked at her dazedly, unsure of how to react.
Should I hug and comfort her or should I demand to know why she kept all of these from me?
Bella's brows came together, puzzled at my lack of reaction at her urgent statement but then she saw what I was holding and she understood. Her already-pale face lost the little color it had left. She realized what I've just seen, what I now finally know.
She doesn't have a long-term deadly disease, far from it.
Instead, Bella didn't tell me that we had a child.
BPOV
He knows; that was the only thought registered in my mind at the moment but I more questions popped out soon enough.
"How did you manage to open the-?" I paused and gritted my teeth. I didn't need to finish the end of that question. I already figured it out. Jacob. It was Jacob, he was the last person I entrusted that box to and now that I think about it, I didn't check the box after he looked through the contents. Did he do it deliberately so that at the time Edward found it, he'd get to read the box? Just like what happened right now? What reason does he have though? I'd definitely give him a piece of my head one of these days.
"So this is what you've kept from me?" Edward said quietly. "That we had a son? Did you find me untrustworthy that you didn't bother to tell me the truth?"
"No." I disagreed. I could tell he was hurt and I tried to comfort him but I couldn't get the words to get out. What would I say?
"Oh that's right; you did tell me with these letters. It's too bad I can't read them while they'reinsidea box."
I felt a bit indignant from what he just said. "If you read all those letters, you would know I tried to tell you the morning I was released from the hospital but then you were already preoccupied."
"Don't you understand Bella? This is what I've been trying to tell you all along. We could start over from this; forget the past. This will be a chapter in our lives with the moral lesson learned. We can avoid the mistakes we made. We could even give Selene a half-sibling…" He meant the last part as a joke to ease some of the tension inside the room but his last sentence only reminded me of why it would be better if he looked for another wife.
I guess I should tell him the truth since he already knew about EJ; what was the point in hiding it from him?
"I can't get pregnant." I quietly said.
This took him aback. "What?"
"You heard what I said. I. Can't. Get. Pregnant." I repeated, emphasizing the words so that he would get it. "At least, not by a long shot the doctor told me. The accident didn't only leave me with a permanent scar on my right hand; it also left me to be this way. I'm destined to be childless, Edward." I felt the threat of tears starting but I tried to suppress it. I need Edward to understand. Maybe if I explained the consequences to him reasonably, we could reach some sort of understanding. Maybe it would end our fight.
I'm sick of being stuck in an impasse.
"I'm sorry." He said.
"Apologizing and saying sorry is different from meaning it."
"I mean everything I said to you." He solemnly said, "I love you, Bella and if loving you means that I have to let you go, then I'll step back and allow you to have your freedom. I don't want you to feel chained when you're stuck with me."
When he said that, my feelings suddenly did a 180° twist and suddenly I didn't want him to go. Yet, I also wanted him to leave because of what he did to me from back then. I was selfish. I wanted both to happen. I'm not even sure of what I should do. Should I encourage him to leave or let him stay?
"Wait," I cried out desperately, "before you go, I want to hear your reasons. Make me understand why you did all those things all those years ago. Please, I need to know."
He took a deep breath and began explaining for the first time in five years, "The first night I slept with Tanya after the party was accidental. She planned it all along. She drugged my drink and took advantage of my drunken self."
"What about the morning when I found the two of you then? Are you also calling that one accidental?"
"No, it wasn't. You see…in that morning that you found us, Tanya had just told me that I was going to be a father. I couldn't believe it when I heard it from her. She admitted about what she did at the party and begged me to help her. And being the foolish person I was back then, I agreed. You don't understand what I'm saying right now Bella but let me explain, I want nothing else in the world than to be a father to my own child. Carlisle had been the model father to me and I wanted my own child to receive that same thing from me. It was a wrong time to be a father then but what could I do? The deed was already done... or so I believed."
"Then why did you sleep with her again that morning?" I whispered, closing my eyes.
"I was still trying to get over the fact that I got her pregnant. I tried to comfort myself in the only way I could… I'm sorry. I admit that I was weak. I didn't stand up to my friends when they were making fun of you back then. I didn't think about what you'd feel until you came and saw that scene with Tanya. When I think about it, I'm really quite selfish, Bella. After all that I did to you, I have no right of taking you back but I thought that we could still find our happiness, no matter what happened between us. It's not the good things that are important in a relationship; it's the obstacles we encounter and how we get over them."
"You don't understand what you're saying if you still want me back. I just told you. I can't give you the child you want unlike Tanya. That's half of the reason why I don't want to get so close to you, I don't want to disappoint you."
"Actually, Selene's not my real daughter." He confessed.
"Wha-?" I felt my mouth open as I absorb what he said.
"Selene is my adoptive daughter. Not only did Tanya made me lose you, she didn't even give me a child I could call my own. Selene's real father is Mike Newton, remember that boy from high school?"
How could I forget him? He was another one of those cruel manipulators that made my relationship with Edward crumble and break down.
I nodded my head.
"It turns out that Tanya and Mike had a little fling before the party so she was about two months pregnant when she told me about my 'baby'."
"Didn't she tell Mike about his baby?"
"She did but Mike rejected the baby. He didn't believe that she was telling him the truth...and truth be told, I don't blame him. It left her feeling desperate for a while, she was about to consider abortion when she saw me and- because she used to be my girlfriend -remembered about my dream about having a child so she planned the party and invited the student body over. She was still thinking about how she could get me to drink the drugged alcohol when you unexpectedly came along that night and helped her. She didn't even need to wheedle the both of us; Mike inadvertently helped her accomplish her plans. I was distraught after you left in that ambulance, I returned to the party and Tanya was there offering a drink to me…" He trailed off.
He didn't need to finish it. I could guess the rest…
Never in all my wildest imaginings of the reasons of why Edward had cheated on me had that ever come up. We were both used as pawns by a twisted witch who didn't even show care for her own daughter. Edward must have been suffering as much I did. He was the target all along. Tanya lied to him and made him believe that they were having a child when she's just tossing him a child she didn't want. I was just at the wrong place at the wrong time. If I hadn't been there, would this have still occurred?
"So I guess we're both stuck like this for life-" He started to say.
"Wait, hold up. Aren't you going to look for another wife?"
"Why would I do that?"
"I'm incapable of providing you an heir. I don't want you to be tied down with me simply because I can't give you an heir. I'm not good enough for you."
He suddenly laughed and just like that, the atmosphere in the room lifted. "And here I thought that all along, I wasn't enough for you." He smiled before proclaiming, "Selene could be the heir. Can I visit EJ with you when you visit him?"
He had every right to after missing eight years with his son.
"Of course." I agreed.
"And Bella… about your alleged admirer…"
"Yes?" I eagerly looked up, wondering if he knows who my admirer is.
But then he shook his head as though he made up his mind, "It's nothing. I wish him the best of luck."
BPOV
"Look at what my admirer gave me for Valentine's day, isn't he sweet?" I cooed as I showed Alice and Angela my letter at work.
"A letter? Your admirer just gave you a letter for Valentine's day?" Alice incredulously asked.
"Why are you disappointed?"
"I was expecting something else. It's Valentine's, you'd think he'd give you something more than a plain letter."
"Oh you mean that one?" I wrinkled my nose.
"What do you mean? What is that one?" Angela asked.
"He gave me chocolates. Is that what the both of you were looking for?"
This caused Alice to perk up. "That's the one. What brand did he give you? My valentine gave me three Kisses because he told me that the three means that he loves me."
"Uh… he didn't give me a specific brand."
"I don't understand." Alice said impatiently before taking a glance at Angela, "I mean, we don't understand."
"He gave every kind of chocolate which could be seen at a candy shop."
"All?!" Alice exclaimed, stunned.
"But so what? It doesn't matter. I love his letter. It was so simple yet he had a way with his words that made my heart flutter a bit."
I held the letter to my chest as I remembered one sentence he said: Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it. It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don't risk anything, you risk even more.
"I can't believe this; Edward bought you all kinds of chocolate?" Alice queried.
"My admirer did; why do you keep saying that he's Edward?"
"Oh Bella," She shook her head sympathetically and gave me a look which said that she knows something I don't; "there's a lot you that don't know."
"Miss Bella, your friend, Mister Jacob Black is waiting for you upstairs in your room. He said that he wanted to know what you want with him." James said when I entered the house.
"Finally!" I said as I made my way to the stairs to have my word with him about what he did.
Jacob's POV (A/N: Surprise! This is one of the surprises I was saying at the last chapter)
I sat down Bella's bed as I waited for Bella to arrive (I know that she shared her bed with Edward but I like to think that the bed only belonged to her). I think I might know the reason why Bella called me here, it's because I purposely didn't close the lock of the box that contained her letter.
I'm guessing Edward saw the box which was why she sounded downright irritated when she was talking to me at the phone telling me to be here.
Stretching my arms as I yawned, I looked for something to do to keep my mind alert while I waited for Bella. Opening the end table beside the bed, I sifted through its contents until I saw a letter.
Neat! So is this another one of Bella's letters?
Curiously, I opened the paper and read:
Dear Bella,
Did you like the chocolates I gave you? I certainly hope that it was enough. My friend kept telling me that I gave you enough to last the whole year.
How are you? How's your work? I've been busy at work and doing other things as well. I know you don't like the gifts but please accept them for me, I've put so much thought to all of them and they all mean something.
Like the chocolates, it reminded me of how sweet you can be…
Oops, did I just sound like a lovesick idiot just now? I'm sorry but I can't help it; it's true. You kidnapped my heart and I demand that you return it right now!
Just kidding about returning it back. Keep it; it's yours to hold forevermore.
And finally, it's time for my next clue: "I might be closer than you think."
Have you guessed who I am?
The letter wasn't finished but even though it wasn't signed. I immediately know who her so-called admirer was. It was obvious.
It was none other than her husband, Edward.
BPOV
I burst into the room and burst out, "I can't believe you could what you did to me, Jake. I thought you were my best friend! Care to give me an explanation why you didn't lock the box? Were you hoping that Edward and I would get into a fight? Well congratulations, you got your wish but we also made up so it's too bad for you, huh?" I sauntered over to him when he still didn't appear to hear my outburst.
"Hey are you listening to me-?" I turned him around by his shoulder and was about to give him the most important lecture of his life but then I saw what he held in his hand. "What's that?"
Wordlessly, he passed the oddly familiar paper. I thought that he was holding previous letter of my admirer but it wasn't. It was an unfinished letter of my admirer.
"Why is this with you?" I demanded. "Where did you get this?" I paused before asking him the question that's been in my mind for the previous weeks. I needed to know.
"Are you my admirer, Jacob?"
EPOV
Exhausted from work, I longed for nothing else but the comfort of the soft bed upstairs which was inviting me to sink in its covers and never wake up again. Wait for me, I'm nearly there; I called to it in my mind. I trudged up the stairs and down the hallway, careful not to disturb anyone who might be sleeping.
I was about to open the door when I stopped.
The master's bedroom door was opened an inch. I could tell that the light was on from the crack but it wasn't the light which made me pause from opening the door. No, it was the voice I heard coming from inside and what it was saying which made me stop and listen for a while.
"Are you my admirer, Jacob?" Bella was asking.
I patiently waited for Jacob to disagree. After all, how could Bella even think for one second that Jacob Black had the potential to be her admirer?
It was preposterous; utterly laughable. As if Jacob could do the things I was planning for Bella.
So there I was, with one hand on the doorknob as I waited for my wife's best friend to get it over with and get the hell out of here.
How did Bella even get the notion of that idea anyway?
It must have been a long time before Jacob finally answered her because I started having leg cramps by just standing still and not moving as I waited for his answer. It turned out that the cramp was the least of my worries because when Jacob spoke, he said, "I am."
Three words came into my mind then and those were: What the hell?!
And what did I tell you? It's long, isn't it?
So… what do you think?
You all have a lot to tell me about this chapter like what was your reaction to Edward's story and with Jacob's little white lie? Like I said before this chapter, I didn't like how the confrontation went but I don't know… I'm having doubts. And now that you've heard Edward's excuse for "cheating", do you still hate him?
I feel sorry for him after I typed that part: losing his girlfriend and his baby is tough so now I hate Tanya for making this happen even though I wrote all of it.
Haha, anyway, enough of the mindless babbling and tell me your thoughts!
What do you think is going to happen next?
jumarxie