I'm baack! That's right, folks, we've only got two more chapters to go (including an epilogue). That's kind of really all I have to say...
Not mine.
"Just a little more, Adds," he encourages his girlfriend.
"I hate you!" she cries.
"What? Why?"
"You're standing there being perfect, and I'm ugly, and in pain, and I can't blame you for any of it!" she sobs. The end of her sentence is punctuated by another scream.
"Okay, Addison," Dr. Weaver, Addison's temporary replacement, says. "You're ready. Now I'm going to want you to push. Can you do that?"
"I don't care, just get her out!"
Dr. Weaver chuckles. "Sounds like a plan to me."
0ooo0
"Knock, knock," Izzie says, poking her head into Addison's hospital room. "Can I come in?"
"If you can stand to look at me without makeup. I must look hideous."
"You look beautiful," Izzie says truthfully. "Motherhood suits you."
Addison blushes. "Thank you, Izzie."
"I can't believe I got called into surgery. It was really stupid too, because I was totally thinking about you the entire time. I wish I could have been there!"
Addison laughs. "Believe me, you wouldn't have wanted to. My insults can get… colorful when I'm in pain."
"Still," Izzie pouts. "But where's Melanie? I do get to see the bundle of joy, right?"
Addison smiles. "She's in the nursery. Alex is with her. I'm supposed to be sleeping."
"Oh," Izzie says anxiously. "You don't mind if I go now, do you? I mean, you are supposed to be sleeping and all."
"Go!" Addison laughs. The woman almost looks more eager to see her daughter than she is. Almost.
0ooo0
"Hey, Daddy!" Izzie exclaims as she bounds up to the nursery window.
"I'm not a dad," he replies.
She sighs. "Maybe not technically. But what you're doing for Addison is so… decent. You grew up when nobody was watching, Alex."
"Thanks, Iz, but I don't want to talk about it."
She frowns. "You look scared out of your mind right now," she comments.
He wants to scream that yes, he's scared out of his mind right now. He's been scared out of his mind for the past two weeks, and now it's one hundred times worse. She doesn't understand the sleepless nights he's spent, thinking about his father. She doesn't get that he's absolutely terrified of getting the slightest bit angry around Addison, because of what he might do. And now, with Melanie… Doesn't she get that he's completely enamored with Melanie Rose Montgomery? And if he ever were to even think about touching her in anger… And then add on top of all that, all the pressures of being a father.
"I… I have to get out of here," he says, more to himself than her.
"Leave?" Izzie asks. "Now? You can't leave now!"
He doesn't look at her as he replies, "Watch me."
And then he practically sprints away, leaving a shocked and slightly panicked Izzie behind.
0ooo0
Addison can hear Callie and Izzie whispering frantically outside her door. There's no need for that—she already knows exactly what they're talking about. "You can stop whispering, you know," she calls to them as loudly and as calmly as possible. "I know what you're saying."
Izzie and Callie slink into the room as if they've stolen the last cookie from the cookie jar. "He's gone, isn't he?" Addison asks. Neither of her friends answer, but their silence says everything. "Okay," she nods. "Okay."
A tear slips down her cheek, forging a trail for the ones that follow. She knew that everything was too perfect. She knew that he would leave. She knew that eventually he'd come to his senses. He was taking responsibility for a child that wasn't his—who does that? He probably had no idea of what he was getting himself into, and then second he saw Melanie, even though she's the most perfect thing to ever grace the earth, he freaked out.
Izzie and Callie stand silently as Addison starts to cry, and then weep. She's never cried this hard in her life. And the worst part is that she seems not to be conscious of anything but her own grief, feeding off it to create even more tears.
Izzie tries to hug the older woman, but she yanks out of her embrace, crying that she wants Alex, only Alex.
Callie offers to have Melanie brought in, but that plan doesn't work either. She doesn't want to see her baby, she doesn't want to see anyone but him.
They watch helplessly as their friend dissolves further into hysterics. Just when they're seriously starting to consider sedating her before she can hurt herself, Alex practically runs into the room.
Izzie's the first to notice and she wastes no time crossing the room to shove him. "Where the hell were you?!"
He doesn't answer, he doesn't even look at her. He just keeps moving towards Addison. He sits down in the chair beside her and grabs her hand. "Addison, it's okay. I'm here. I'm here and I'm not leaving. It's okay."
It takes even the great Alex Karev a couple minutes to calm her down. When she does, he kisses her softly. She slaps him.
"Don't you ever do that to me again, Alex Karev," she snaps. "Ever."
"I won't," he replies easily. "Especially if you always slap that hard."
0ooo0
"Where the hell were you?" Izzie asks, as they stand at the window to the nursery. Addison is sleeping; the physical and emotional exertions are finally taking their toll.
"Running," he replies simply. It's always easier to think when he's running.
"Any particular reason you decided to send your girlfriend into hysterics?"
"I needed to think."
"Oh, he needed to think!" Izzie cries sarcastically.
"I was scared out of my mind, okay?!" he exclaims. "I needed to think!"
Izzie's face softens. "And what did you think?"
"I thought that I'm not my dad," he admits.
"No, you're not," Izzie agrees.
"I have to learn from his mistakes, right?"
"Exactly."
"You want to hear something really stupid?" he asks.
"Always," Izzie replies.
"With Addison today, when I stopped being such an asshole, I realized that I want my own kids, which are the one thing she can't give me. But the only person in the world I'd want them with is her."
Izzie smiles sadly. "I don't know what to tell you, Alex. Vicious circles suck."
They stare in silence at little Melanie Rose Montgomery. "She really is beautiful," Izzie comments.
"She is, isn't she?" Alex replies. Izzie hears the mixture of wonder and love that she's heard in every delivery room she's ever been in.
She grins. "Alex, I think you and I both know you love that little girl too much to leave her."
And then she walks off to give him time to realize that she's right.
0ooo0
"Welcome home, Mellie," Addison whispers to her infant. Alex started calling her that, for absolutely no apparent reason, and Addison had quickly picked it up from him. It was hard to explain but the nickname just fit the girl whose eyes were most definitely her mother's.
"How are you feeling?" Alex asks her.
"Tired, sore, and fat," Addison snaps. "None of which is your fault, and I should quit taking it out on you," she amends when he sends her a look that says he just asked her a question, and there's no need to bite his head off.
He nods and kisses her. They walk into the (light yellow) nursery of their home to find that Izzie and Callie have taken the time to hang a banner that says "Welcome home, Mellie!" on it (once Addison had started calling Melanie Mellie, everyone else soon followed suit).
Addison takes one look at the banner and promptly bursts into tears.
Alex sighs and settles himself in for an emotional couple of months.
Like I said, I've got one more chapter and an epilogue in me. Hopefully you can find it in your heart to review. ;)
-Juli-