How To Cry In History Class (Bella)

"The new kid is staring at you," Lauren whispers.

Bella is too fascinated with her European History textbook to pay attention. "Did you know the Romans used to eat peacock tongues?"

"Ew!"

"And they threw away the rest of the bird. It was a sign of wealth and status." This book is a treasure trove of information. Until now Bella has read literature almost exclusively, but now she's in college-prep classes. There's so much more to learn. High school is amazing and it's only the first day.

Lauren is clearly less concerned about the Ancient Romans than she is about the newest residents of Forks. "Seriously, Bella, it's weird. Did you piss him off?"

That gets Bella's attention. "What do you mean?"

Lauren nods toward the back of the room.

Bella looks.

Edward Cullen is staring. Viciously. As though he'd like nothing more than to murder her and bury her body in the woods. His hands are clenched into fists around the edge of the desk.

She turns around so fast she almost falls off her chair. "I haven't said anything to him," she whispers to Lauren, her face flushing deep red.

"You must have done something."

"I..." Bella can practically feel Edward Cullen's glare boring into her back. "I don't think so?" she says uncertainly.

Bella, like everyone else, had been intrigued when she'd heard five new kids would be joining them in high school. No one ever moved to Forks. To have not just one new student but five was unprecedented.

And they were so good-looking. Impossibly good-looking. Destroy your self-esteem just by being in the same room good-looking. Peek around the corner of the hall just to catch a glimpse good-looking.

Bella had done the latter between first period and second period. She'd peered out of a classroom, trying to hide behind the door, trying to get a decent look at these inhumanly gorgeous siblings. She hadn't succeeded - she'd only seen their backs as they huddled together by their lockers.

Maybe Edward Cullen had seen her? Maybe he was angry that she had been spying?

Embarrassment and shame creeps through her body, starting in her face and running all the way down to her toes. That has to be it; she'd been incredibly rude. Goggling like they were some sort of circus attraction when she'd never even spoken to them.

She'd just have to apologize right after class. The thought catches her breath and she has to fight down the urge to hyperventilate - approaching someone she doesn't even know and talking to them - but it is the polite thing to do. She'll just... do it fast, before she has time to blush too much.

"Maybe he likes you," Lauren says as the teacher stands up from his desk and starts passing out papers.

Bella turns to look again, just for a quick second. Edward Cullen is beautiful, like one of the marble statues in the Grecian mythology book Mrs. Hughes had lent her last year (Bella had promised to walk to the elementary school and visit at least once a week, there was no way she could do without Mrs. Hughes). Edward Cullen is dazzling - so dazzling he doesn't look real. He doesn't look alive.

And he is much, much too pale.

"He's not my type," she whispers back to Lauren, and then the history class begins.

Bella waits just outside the classroom after the bell rings. The people she's known her entire life file past her, juggling notebooks and wrestling with backpacks. She takes several deep breaths, and then Edward Cullen appears in the doorway. He stops instantly at the sight of her.

"Hi." Her voice squeaks but at least it's audible. "I'm Bella Swan."

His nose wrinkles.

"I... I just..." She falters, quailing under his furious black eyes. She forces out in a rush, "I'mreallysorryIspiedonyou."

Edward Cullen's lip curls in obvious disgust, revealing blinding white teeth. Then he turns on his heel and storms down the hallway faster than she's ever seen anyone move.

Bella tries - she always tries, she tries so hard- but she bursts into tears anyway.

(She is getting better about it. She hasn't had a complete breakdown since two summers ago; she'd been staring at the endless shelves of feminine products, her gut twisting in wretched pain, her father standing red-faced next to her and unable to help, and she'd known that Mrs. Black would have known what she should buy. She'd cried so hard she'd had to run out of the store. Her father had come back to the car with one of everything and a big tub of vanilla ice cream.)

"Wow." Lauren is standing nearby, waiting for Bella to come to algebra. "What a jerk."

Hiccuping, Bella thinks maybe she doesn't like high school after all.