Chapter 21: The End

EdwardPOV

I rolled over and stuck my hand out, feeling the coolness of the sheets next to me.

I could have sworn Bella was there.

I sat up in my bed a little groggy and dizzy. She was no where to be found. I looked at the pillow on my side and the smell of strawberries lingered off it.

Climbing out my bed, I walked into the shower. As the hot water pelted my body, I couldn't shake the sinking feeling that something was horribly wrong.

Drying myself off, I slipped on my light blue slim jeans, a black, gray, and white stripped sweater, and my black chucks.

I also made sure I had on the gift Bella gave me, around my neck.

Walking down the steps, the only thing on my mind was what my mother was making for breakfast.

"Good Morning everyone," I called out, as I passed the table.

But no one responded.

I backed up a little and turned to face them, "Is everything okay?"

I looked at my families grim faces, it looked like someone died. But everyone was here except – Bella.

"What's wrong?" I asked louder, my throat seeming to close. "Where's Bella?"

"She's gone Edward," my father mumbled.

"What do you mean gone?" The only scenarios going on, were ones I never wanted to revisit in my mind.

"She left Edward," my mom stated, her voice shaking. "This morning, she left without telling us."

My mind started to clear, "I know she did. I didn't find her in the bed, I figured she went home."

"Edward she left this," Jasper stood up and handed me a paper.

I leaned back against the wall and flipped open the folded piece of paper.

My Family,

Words can not express how grateful I am for all that you have given me in the past months that I have known you all. You guys gave me a home and a family when mine was falling apart. You guys saved me and I can't thank you enough. Carlisle and Esme, you both have been like my very own parents.

Thank you Carlisle for always helping me when I fell. And Esme thank you for being my mom, when I lost my own. Emmett you're like the big brother I always wanted but never got to have. Rosalie, you are so beautiful and so strong. I wish I had half the strength and courage you have. Alice, you're my sister. You made me love everything about shopping, and you always knew how to make me feel better. Jasper, I don't know what to say, you're my best friend, my brother, my protector.

Please understand I did not do this because I wanted to, understand that what I am doing is what is best in the end. I do have one favor to ask, please take care of Edward for me. I love him so truly, so deeply that I can't see anything happen to him. Tell him to be safe and watch him from time to time. Know that I love you all and will never forget any of you. Thank you again for everything and I hope we'll meet again.

Love Always, Isabella Marie Swan

By the time I had finished the letter I didn't realize I had sank down towards the floor. My chest heaved, I couldn't catch my breath. It felt like a panic attack. Bella, my Bella had left. And for the reasons unknown, all I knew was because it was for the best.

I stared wide eyed at my family from my spot rooted on the dining room floor. I slowly stood straight and bolted for the front door. Ignoring my families questions.

I hopped in the driver's seat of my Volvo and sped off to the only place I knew I could find out the truth. I zoomed past the trees, not paying attention to the road as I fiddled on my cell phone.

"Hey you reached Bella, leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I can."

I clicked my phone shut and shoved it in my pocket, this wasn't helping.

I pulled into the driveway and I saw the cruiser and Bella's Chevy pick up. That means she still had to be here, she wouldn't leave without her car. Right?

I jumped out my car and ran up the front porch steps. I looked to my right and saw the exact spot where Bella and I watched the snow fall.

I banged against the door and waited for an answer.

"Coming," it was muffled behind the door.

I banged and knocked harder. Desperate to find out the truth.

The door swung open and I was met by Charlie.

"Sir, where's Bella?" I asked losing my patience.

"Ugh Edward," he said, stepping aside to let me in. "She's not here anymore."

"Well where did she go?"

But he didn't answer, he just looked down. I was losing my nerves and dashed up the stairs towards Bella's bedroom. He didn't even try to stop me.

When I made it up there and threw open the door, the horror and reality of the whole thing hit me like 10 tons of bricks.

It was clean. But not like I just cleaned up my mess clean but an empty clean. The walls were bare. The pictures that hung by her bed were gone. Her bed was made and there wasn't one single thing out of place. Her vanity was clean too, her make-up and hair products were gone.

I walked over to her closest and opened the doors, hoping for clothes to be found but it was useless. Nothing hung from the racks. I slammed open the drawers in her dresser but that was a lost cause too, cause nothing was left behind.

"I'm sorry Edward," Charlie's voice, broke through my thoughts. "She had to."

"Why did she leave me?" I moaned, falling against her bed.

"I'm just so sorry." With that he left the room and me alone to my misery.

I felt my heart clench and my breathing become labored, I couldn't swallow the huge lump in my throat. My world was sucking me up alive.

It felt like I was being flipped in every direction without any amount of warning. It was like someone was pulling my limbs till the point I was going to break. Everything I was feeling right now was nothing compared to the pain stabbing and twisting in my heart. It was drowning me and then slamming me into walls, burying me in 50 feet of solid concrete.

All these feeling were tumbling around inside me, until I just felt numb. To the point where I couldn't feel anything. Because everything just hurt that bad, that I lost complete feeling.

I couldn't think. I couldn't breathe.

I finally pulled myself together enough to get up off her bed and walk back to my car.

I slowly descended the stairs in hopes of memorizing every detail of this house, every memory it held inside.

Once I reached the door, Charlie's voice broke through again.

"She loved you, you know." He sighed. "No matter how much it seems like she didn't, she did. More than anything."

I couldn't speak, I nodded my head and continued to walk back to my car.

With one swift slam of my car door, I was on the road again, heading home.

My house was quiet, deathly quiet. So quiet you could hear the heartbeats of my family.

Strangely, without thinking, I made it up to my room. I gained momentum when I got there. And I went towards the CD player and it was empty. I went searching through my dresser, for anything that belonged to her but I turned up with nothing. She had cleaned out my closest before she left.

I kept trying to grasp the concept of her disappearance. Was she not happy with me? Did she want more? Perhaps something I couldn't give her? Did she even ever love me like I did her?

"Don't let anything that happens make you doubt that I ever loved you, because that's all I do, I live to love you."Her voice rang through my ears.

She knew she was leaving last night, and that's why she cried so much. Everything the gift, the dance. It was her good bye.

"You mean the world to me and please no matter what happens now don't forget that."

I tried to shut my eyes and breathe through my nose. It wasn't helping to hear her voice in my head.

I pulled open the last dresser drawer that belonged to her and there it was, the only thing she left behind.

I picked up the pair of blue jeans and analyzed the detailing. They were old and worn. Kinda faded, with several rips. They also had writing on the thigh. I traced over the words with the tip of my index finger.

Flashback

Bella and I were just lying on her bed. Her legs across my lap.

"Love, how old are these jeans?" I asked, staring at the tattered material.

She chuckled, not looking up from her book, "A few years, they're my favorite."

I laughed and picked up the black sharpie marker from my notebook. I found the perfect spot on the center of her thigh and began writing.

"Edward, What are you doing?!" she asked, startled.

"Writing," I responded continuing my work. "Do you like it?"

She looked down at her leg and read the words I wrote in my 'sort of okay' handwriting.

"E + B = TLA," she whispered smiling. "TLA?"

"True Love Always," I stated, answering her question. "That's what we have."

"I love you Edward," she smiled. "Always."

I leaned over her body and planted a small kiss on her waiting lips, "I love you too."

End of Flashback

Shaking out the jeans, something white came flying out. I reached for the folded piece of paper and brought it over to my bed. Slowly opening it, I looked at the messy handwriting that could only belong to one person.

My Dearest Edward,

Words can not express how sorry I am for any pain this might have caused you. If you're reading this then you already know that I am gone and that no one really knows where I went. What I can tell you is that I am safe and I'm okay. I'm so sorry for leaving you without a proper good bye or even a reason why I left.

Just please know that everything I am doing, I'm doing to ensure your future. I want the best for you and no matter how much I wished, I just couldn't be that for you. Follow your dreams Edward, please for me. I'm doing this to make sure you have the opportunity to become a doctor and I want that for you more than anything else.

You and I were different, but in many ways we were the same. You were the one who taught me the value of love. You showed me what it meant to care for another and I am a better person because of it. I don't want you to ever forget that. I know what we had was real, and I am happy we were able to come together, even if it was for a short amount of time.

You are my best friend as well as my soulmate, and I don't know which side I love more. I do however treasure each side, just as I treasured each moment shared. You're the best person I've ever known. We have had a lifetime together in such a short period of time and most couples will never experience the love we shared.

And if you save my old blue jeans and this letter to read again, that'll be great but if you don't and you just read it once, know that wherever you are and whatever you're doing, I love you now as I write this and I love you now as you read it. And please remember that I will always love you. You are, and have always been my dream come true. Always and Forever.

With Love, Bella

I didn't realize until the letter was over, why I couldn't see the end of it clearly. Somewhere in the midst of reading the last words she left, I had begun to cry.

My Bella was truly gone and she wasn't coming back. I reached for my cell phone and dialed the same number again, for one last time. It rang a few times before I heard her voice again.

"Hey you reached Bella, leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I can."

BellaPOV

"Well home sweet home Bellie," Jake smiled, as he led me inside with my suitcases.

"Izzy," Billy appeared behind the doorway. "How was your flight?"

"Fine," I mumbled out, swallowing back the sob that threatened to come. "Thank you Billy for letting me stay with you."

"I told you. You're like my daughter, anything you need we're here to help. So how far along are you?"

"12 weeks," I answered, automatically.

"And with three?"

"Yup, Billy once I get settled and get a job. I'll move, don't worry."

"What? Why?" Jake asked shocked.

"Because," I explained. "I can't expect your dad to put up with not only me but three babies too. That's way to much."

"Nonsense Izzy," Billy laughed, rolling down the hallway. "Come with me."

Compared to the house they had in La Push, this place was huge. Following them down the hallway, we stopped in front of a wooden door.

"Go on," he encouraged.

I opened the door to reveal a room that was painted a gray and royal blue. There was a huge queen sized bed with millions of pillows on it. A small couch was on the east wall, and it was arranged so I could add my own personal touches. One the west wall there was a single door.

"What's through here?" I asked, gesturing towards the door.

"Go in and check it out Bellie."

I opened the door and walked into a fully decorated nursery. There were three mahogany cribs and a changing table not to far off to the side. A rocking chair was sitting in the corner and there were three car seats by the wall. Also three movable bassinets. The room itself was painted a light blue with white puffy clouds on the ceiling.

"Wow," I breathed, taking in the sight.

"Yeah, Rachael and Rebecca went a little overboard when they found out you were having triplets," Jake grinned, scratching the back of his head.

I completely forgot about Billy until he spoke, "Do you like it?"

"Like it?" I asked astonished. "I love it. It's amazing."

"Good now Isabella, you stay as long as you want." I turned to watch Jake roll Billy out of the nursery and then out my room. Leaving me some time to adjust to my new surroundings.

Brrrrrrrr Brrrrrrrr

I was looking over the dresser and closest set that they had partially filled with baby necessities, when my phone started to vibrate.

Brrrrrrrr Brrrrrrrr

I saw the small LCD screen light up and reveal the name of the only other person I wished I could share this with – Edward.

Brrrrrrrr Brrrrrrrr

I felt my heart clench and my throat tighten, as it continued to buzz in my hand.

I shut my eyes and pressed the phone to my chest. He wasn't making anything easier.

My phone finally stopped buzzing as the voice mail picked up. I wondered if he would leave a message.

My legs shook and my breathing cut short as the little ding signaled I had a new message. I felt the tears roll down my face as I flipped it open and held down the 1 key to open my mailbox.

Inside my head there was a raging war going on, it would make it much harder to let it all go if I heard his voice.

"Hey... its me. I kind figured you wouldn't pick up your phone, I just thought I'd try... When I woke up this morning and found my bed empty I knew something was wrong... it just didn't occur to me what. I realize now that you wanted yesterday so special because it was your unofficial good bye... I found your letter and I promise I'll keep it along with your jeans... I honestly don't know where to go from here but I will promise you that I will set out to do the things I wanted. I'll be a doctor.

...Bella, I don't know how to say good bye to you. And I figured maybe that's why you truly never said it for real. I wish you would tell me why you left, because maybe like that I would understand... I miss you, I hope you miss me too. My chest it closes a little more, every minute that you're not here. I want you to be happy Bella, if I couldn't be the one to make you happy, I want someone to – someday. I don't wanna forget you, or pretend that you didn't exist. I want to remember you always. I carry you in my heart Bella, wherever you are and whatever you're doing, know that I love you and I always will.

...Good bye Bella."

By the time the voice mail ended, I was curled up on the rocking chair. Every word he said, tore me apart inside. I tried to steady my breathing and tell myself I was okay but I couldn't. I wasn't.

The only thing that helped, was thinking about the three little babies I had to take care of. Edward sounded so broken, so raw, I'd never heard him cry before. I wanted to call him back and tell him everything and how sorry I was, but I couldn't, I wouldn't let myself.

It was supposed to be a clean break, but it was like being stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Its whats best. I kept repeating in my head. Now I only had to believe it.

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