Chapter 21: Loss

Though sunrise was a little over an hour away, the night sky above Orgrimmar was tinged with a slight gray overcast that hinted at the possibility of a storm. Even the air, thick and heavy in the form of a dense mist that lofted through the various valleys of the large city, held the scent of impending rain. The gloomy darkness, added to the eerie quietness that filled the dimly lit streets, created an unsettling atmosphere.

Ki'ra was disappointed with the spirits' choice of weather for the day that would truly begin her quest. In fact, she was disappointed with how the day was beginning overall. She had awoken from her deep and pleasant sleep energized and vibrant, eager to set off on the journey to the far away region of Quel'thalas. When her other party members were awake, the group of ten immediately began preparing to leave Orgimmar. Their mounts were collected from the stablemaster, re-saddled, and packed with the supplies they would need for their journey. While Ki'ra's cheerful attitude and upbeat smile was a complete opposite to the dreary weather, her comrades' attitudes seemed to reflect the lethargic sky. They moved with quiet concentration, collecting their supplies and packing them into as few bags as possible. It did not surprise Ki'ra that the Barbarians were sullen; they were usually gruff and stern when they were geared in their armor and focused. Even the older witch doctor was known to be reserved. Her friends, however, seemed uncharacteristically somber. Kall glowered with a silent broodiness that was strange even for him; he spoke only to his sister, whose eyes seemed tired and worn. Ura moved in a half daze as she packed her mount. Even Nok's customary childish smile was absent from his face as he sharpened his blades.

Yet it was Akashii's demeanor that troubled Ki'ra the most. After the intimate moment they had shared the night before, the priestess expected their following interactions to be much warmer. However, when the warrior emerged from his bedroom with Kall and Nok, he looked haggard and exhausted. Dark rings hung beneath his eyes and he moved with a stiffness that showed he had not slept well. When Ki'ra greeted him and asked what was wrong, he simply gave her a weak smile and replied, "Nuthin', Ki'ra. Jus' a lil' tired, dat's all," and moved past the woman without another word. His aloofness concerned and saddened Ki'ra, but when the blood elf Pyreanor came to the inn to inform her that the zeppelin was ready, the priestess put the matter aside.

Led by the paladin, the party rode through the nearly empty streets of Orgimmar and traveled the short distance to the flight port to the left of the outer gates. A goblin zeppelin, larger than the vessel that Ki'ra had first rode on when she arrived in Durotar, was anchored to the top of the tower. A crew of goblins helped the Trolls unload their mounts and secure them into the holds beneath the deck of the zeppelin.

"We shall arrive in Silvermoon City tomorrow evening. When you are ready, I and a group of Blood Knights shall escort you as far as the Sanctum of the Sun, which borders the smaller forest Troll settlements outside of Zul'Aman," Pyreanor told Ki'ra as they stood on the deck of the zeppelin watching the goblins begin to release the anchors that tethered the flying ship to the port. Akashii stood not far behind her. Despite the tension between them, the warrior had remembered his responsibilities as group leader and Chosen and remained at her side to listen to the blood elf's words. "I'm afraid that because of the Amani Trolls'…unrestrained hatred for my kind, that is as far as we may travel with you. It'd be too dangerous to venture deeper into the forest."

"That will be more than enough, Master Pyreanor," Ki'ra responded with a grateful nod. "We shall be fine on our own once we enter the forest. Vol'jin gave us a map to guide us to Zul'Aman, though I doubt it will be difficult to find our way."

"Very well, Priestess, Ki'ra," the blood elf replied, though Ki'ra could sense skepticism behind his words concerning what would happen to them once they entered the domain of the forest trolls. "We shall be casting off soon. There is not much to do but relax on this long voyage."

Ki'ra nodded to the paladin as he left her and Akashii to themselves near the railing. The zeppelin's anchors were secured and a goblin crewmember pulled up the boarding ramp as the blades of the machine began to spin, propelling the vessel into a slow crawl. Ki'ra nervously pulled at the beads of her cinch as she realized that she and Akashii were alone. Out of the corner of her eye, Ki'ra could see the warrior gazing out over the edge of the airship and into the still dark night sky, his heavy eyes unfocused. What had happened since last night that made him so aloof toward her?

"Akashii," Ki'ra said softly as she turned toward him.

"Hm?" the Troll grunted, still staring out into the sky.

A slight irritation nagged at her. Why wouldn't he even look at her? "Is everything alright?" she asked with a sigh. "You seem so…distant. Is there something bothering you?"

"Nah, Ki'ra," the warrior said after a pause that was too long for the answer to be truthful. "Jus' tired, like I said." He finally looked at her and gave a bare smile. "I'm gonna go do a bit a duelin' wit Nok. Ya gonna be okay by yourself?"

The priestess stared at him, silent for a moment as she studied his face. Something was troubling him. She could feel tension and sorrow radiating from his body and see it in his eyes. It annoyed her slightly that, despite how close they had grown, Akashii had not shared many of his own feelings with her except for the one instance inside his hut. However, she did not desire a repeat of what had occurred there, so she only returned his feeble smile and nodded. "I'll be okay alone," she lied. "Go on."

Akashii nodded and turned away to find his friend. Ki'ra watched him leave and then walked the short distance to the very rear of the zeppelin. A barely visible sliver of morning outlined the horizon of the great sea. The light was hazy and gray, denoting that some rain was definitely on its way. Atal'Shango, Ki'ra prayed silently to the Loa of Storms. Please, quell your fury in the skies and grant us the weather to pass safely to our destination.

She sighed deeply and closed her eyes, feeling doubt, sorrow, and fear return to her. "Atal'Zan?" she said within her mind, searching out for the presence of the Loa inside her. "Are you there?"

I am always with you, my child. What troubles you?

"I feel…uncertain again," she replied. "My journey is not starting off the way I anticipated it would. I feel negative energies all around me, within my comrades as well as myself. Even the skies seem to reflect such bad juju."

You must have faith, Ki'ra. Just as you have your own fears, so do your comrades. They are uncertain of what is to come. You must be their assurance, their strength. It is in you that their confidence lies, therefore you must remain strong.

"I have told them that you assure our safety in Zul'Aman, but I can sense their skepticism. I…cannot blame them, Great Mother, for even I do not know how such a thing can be guaranteed. After what the warchief told me concerning the Amani Trolls' feelings towards other races, even their brethren, I cannot help but be skeptical of the chance we may acquire Jin'rohk. It is more likely that we perish just trying to get into Zul'Aman!"

The spirit was silent for a moment and Ki'ra could hear a small sound that seemed like a sigh. It is true, my Vessel, you do risk much danger venturing into Zul'Aman. I may have been…overoptimistic with my assurance of your complete safety. I have sensed a great disruption among my children of the forest. There is much rage and hatred within them and it has corrupted them in a way that is similar to the dark fel magic of the Legion. Their anger is another force that you will have to overcome if you are to obtain the spear. However, I believe there is a way that you can accomplish this.

"What can I possibly do, Great Mother? The war that caused the Forest Trolls to become such vengeful tribes was so long ago. Their fury is deeply engrained within them and is directed not just to the elves that wronged them, but to any they may see as an enemy. What can I do to appeal to them?"

Just as you said to the young warchief, the commonality that links you with your brethren of the forest is faith in the Loa. The Amani have escaped being swayed by the demon Hakkar. They remain deeply devoted to the spirits. There is one individual in particular within the walls of Zul'Aman who may be your equal in spiritual power and a potential ally. Like you, he was once a devoted servant of the Loa and held a deep communion with the spirits. Yet he above all of his tribesmen has become most consumed by the seething hatred that blinds the forest Trolls and leads them from our blessing. He is enveloped in vengeance that has both frayed his link with the spirits and made him terribly powerful. I fear that it may take some persuasion to bring him back from the dark place he has cast himself into. Yet if you succeed in doing so, I believe that he will help you acquire the sacred spear and perhaps even direct you to the whereabouts of the books.

Ki'ra did not know if this information further frightened her or gave her hope. If there was someone within Zul'Aman that could help her get the spear, then there was a greater chance that she could succeed in her mission. However, if this individual was as frightening and maddened by rage as Atal'Zan said, he could probably easily destroy her should she fail to persuade him she was an envoy of the Loa.

Swallowing hard, the woman breathed in deeply. If she did not try, then what other solutions did she have? "Very well, Great Mother," the priestess replied in her mind. "Who is he?"

The vessel bound for Quel'thalas would escape the storm that threatened the shores of Kalimdor, yet the late afternoon sky above the Great Sea remained gray and lifeless. Thick clouds hung in the air, filled with mists that made the deck and railing of the ship slick with moisture. The sun was nothing but a hazy ball of dim light beneath the sheet of opaque clouds.

Most of the vessel's occupants had retired to the rooms beneath and above the deck. Only the crew and the Zandali priestess remained on deck. Ki'ra stood at the front of the ship, looking over into the expanse of nothingness ahead of them. Even the sea had disappeared beneath the clouds. She was not bothered by the gloomy weather. In fact, the quiet that it brought was useful as it gave her the means to focus on the thoughts that swirled through her mind. There was much that she pondered over, mostly concerning the guidance Atal'Zan had given her just a few hours ago. Yet she also mulled over the strange tension between her and Akashii. The priestess had considered asking the Great Loa for advice concerning her feelings for the male, but the matter seemed trivial compared to the task she was about to undertake. It was foolish, Ki'ra felt, that she was worrying about her emotions when she was about to venture into very dangerous territory in order to reclaim a relic of the Loa. Yet they bothered her just as much as her fears of the future did.

"Whatcha doin' up here all by ya'self, Ki'ra?"

The priestess turned around as Kanna walked up beside her. The shaman smiled, pulling her cloak around her shoulders and shuddered. "Da weather be a lil' cold wit all dis mist. Why don'cha come back down below wit da rest of us?"

Ki'ra smiled back at Kanna and turned her eyes back to the sky. "I…needed to be alone for a while. I have been speaking to the Loa about our journey. The weather, albeit a little dismal, allows me to focus."

"Ah, I see," Kanna murmured. A small smile played on her lips. "Ya would'na also be stayin' up here to avoid a certain warrior, would ya?"

Flushing, the priestess bowed her head and pulled her own cloak further up her neck. "I…he just seems to want some space away from me," Ki'ra replied sheepishly.

"Well, I dunno what's goin' between ya two, but he looks more melancholy than dis weather. I know dat everyone be a lil' worried bout what may happen once we get to Zul'Aman. Da idea of goin' der got us all on edge, but Akashii look like mo' is on his mind." The shaman tipped her head as she looked at Ki'ra. "And ya are startin' to look da same. Wanna talk about it?"

Sighing heavily, Ki'ra looked at Kanna. The woman had become her closest friend during her stay in Durotar. They had shared much with one another and Ki'ra was always comfortable with the idea of confiding in her. Kanna was wise and listened with an open mind, offering her advice only when it was asked. If Ki'ra could not talk to Atal'Zan about her feelings for Akashii, then Kanna would be a good substitute.

"Hmm," Kanna murmured after Ki'ra had finished telling her about the kiss she and Akashii had shared in the inn and his peculiar behavior afterward. The two women were huddled beneath their cloaks, sitting against the railing of the deck. Kanna had erected a small fire totem that pulsated with soft heat. "Ya know how he be, Ki'ra. Akashii is not one to really talk too much 'bout how he feels. He'd soonah avoid ya than be faced wit' havin' to tell ya what's really on his mind."

"But that's so irritating!" the priestess snorted as she warmed her hands in front of Kanna's totem. "I don't want to have to force him into telling me how he feels. I thought he truly cared about me when he kissed me, but if he did he wouldn't be so cold toward me."

"He does luv ya, Ki'ra, dat's plain to see," Kanna sighed while shaking her head. "I bet dat he jus' feels a lil' guilty 'bout it considerin' how he felt 'bout Sian." She exhaled deeply, bring her long arms beneath her head. "And he might be a lil' afraid bein' dat he lost her when we was fightin' in Outland. What wit' bein' ya Chosen and all, he could fear failin' you like he felt dat he failed Sian."

"But Akashii didn't fail her," Ki'ra replied. Though she had figured aloofness toward her had something to do with Sian, Ki'ra had not considered Akashii may feel afraid of loosing her like he did his dead lover. "It wasn't his fault. She was killed by the Legion. There was nothing he could have done."

Kanna shrugged. "He don't see it dat way though. Akashii always looked after Sian when we was all kids. Sian was born wit' a weak body and was always sick. 'Kash took care and looked ovah her. Even when Sian became one of da best warriors in da village, he always felt like he had to protect her." She smiled sadly. "He's a good one, Akashii is. Cares more for da life of othas than he does his own."

Pondering over Kanna's words, Ki'ra smiled softly and put her chin on her knees. Her slight irritation with Akashii disappeared and was replaced by sympathy and admiration. "He's so kind," she murmured as she reached out toward the totem slowly. Reacting to the power within her, small strands of fire lofted from the wooden surface of the relic and twisted gracefully around the priestess' fingers. "I just wish that he would open up to me and would tell me these things. I can understand that he is fearful and wishes not to fail me…but I don't want him to think that he cannot confide in me." Ki'ra's head tipped to the side as she watched the fire dance around her hand. "He's more important to me than he knows, Kanna. We share the powers of Atal'Zan. We are…soulbound in a way. If his faith in me is not strong, then I am weak. If I am not confident in his resolve, then he will be weak."

Curiously watching Ki'ra's display, Kanna smiled. "Then perhaps ya need to tell him dat."

Ki'ra sighed as she withdrew her hand and let the fire return into the relic that channeled it. "Perhaps," the priestess replied, yet she was hesitant with the idea of doing such a thing. What if Akashii did not want to speak about such things? Would she further drive a wedge between them?

"But oh da otha hand…" the shaman groaned as she rose stiffly from the wet deck and brushed off her robe. "… 'Kash may jus' need some time to work things out with himself. Ya are da first woman he's evah felt anything for after Sian's death; all dis be new to him." She placed a hand on Ki'ra's shoulder and smiled encouragingly at her. "Give him some time, Ki'ra. He'll realize how good ya are for him and how foolish it is to be afraid of futures dat are not guaranteed."

Staring at Kanna, Ki'ra took in the deep meaning of the last words she had said. She knew the shaman did not mean to, but Kanna had given her sound advice about both of her problems. Ki'ra smiled warmly at her friend and placed her hand on top of hers. "Thank you, Kan," she replied softly. "You don't know how much that helps me."

For the remaining day and half of their voyage to Quel'thalas, the Trolls of the Darkspear Tribe tried to remain as optimistic as possible. Despite their fears of the journey ahead and the dismal weather that slightly dampened their spirits, they went about preparing themselves mentally and physically for the unknown that awaited them beyond borders that some of them had never seen. The two Barbarian warriors sparred with one another on the deck of the vessel, their massive blades crashing against one another like the thunder that was absent from the cloudy sky. The priestess Ura honed her healing skills as Nok and Kall also dueled one another on the other side of the zeppelin. The witch doctor meditated alone in his room while the older female shaman, who was also an alchemist, prepared various elixirs and potions for the journey with Kanna. The blood elf Pyreanor mostly remained to himself except for the few instances he talked with Ki'ra to discuss their traveling plans. During these short meetings, the warrior Akashii accompanied the Zandali priestess as it was his duty to know every part of their plans to enter Zul'Aman. Yet when the blood elf left and the two were alone, the warrior quickly excused himself and left Ki'ra.

Akashii knew his behavior was selfish. Ki'ra was most likely bewildered by his sudden aloofness after the very warm moment they had shared together. He didn't really want to be away from her. If anything, Akashii longed to be by Ki'ra's side during the little time they had before they were to enter the dangerous territory of Zul'Aman. Yet after the horrifying dream he had, the warrior found it difficult to be around the woman without recalling the wicked images he had been shown. The most dreadful had been that of Ki'ra, helpless and screaming on the crimson red earth of Hellfire Peninsula as the fel reaver like beast crushed her.

He knew the dream was not a vision. They were not going to Outland and such a creature could never harm Ki'ra. Yet he knew that what he had been shown stemmed from the fears he had been haunted with ever since the death of Sian. While Akashii had been able to bury the painful emotions within him long after he left Outland, they had resurfaced anew ever since he had admitted to himself that he was in love with the Zandali priestess that had come into his life. Now that he was her Chosen, the dread of possibly losing another woman that he was supposed to protect frightened him.

Akashii stood with his back against a stack of large crates on the deck. His wild red hair blew around his shoulders as he breathed in the crisp evening air. The weather had begun to clear just as the now clearly visible sun slowly descended beneath the horizon beyond the sea. Golden orange light cast shadows across the deck, illuminating the wood paneling of the airship in a golden glow.

The warrior's gaze was directed toward the Troll priestess sitting against the railing of the deck. Her eyes were closed and her long legs peeking from beneath her kilt were crossed. Hands limply resting on her knees and eyes closed, Ki'ra meditated deeply, undisturbed by the sounds of the Trolls dueling, the propellers of the airship, and the shouts of the crew members. The sunrise at her back cast her in a beautiful aura that made her bronze skin and white hair gleam even brighter. The rubies at her throat glimmered like small beacons of red light.

Despite the conflicting emotions that raged through him, Akashii could not help but admire how beautiful she was. Even when he forced himself to stay away from him in order to keep his thoughts somewhat clear, he could not help but think of Ki'ra and how much he was attracted to her. His eyes roamed over the curve of her neck and over her slender yet curvaceous body clad in her tribal vestments. His body hummed with desire and he felt himself grow warm as he watched the rising and falling of her chest. It was so much more than a physical desire though. The time they had spent together in Sen'jin had been filled with friendly conversations, playful activities, and outings through which they bonded and became close. He loved being near her and talking to her. Ki'ra had become a dear friend to him.

Akashii's heart filled with slight sorrow. She was so much like the woman he had lost, but she was also vastly different. Like Sian, Ki'ra had a determination within her that made her strong. Yet she was a more fragile and uncertain whereas Sian was always headstrong and powerful. Akashii had to admit that the need to protect Ki'ra made the woman all the more appealing to him. She needed to rely on him, to trust in him. He liked the idea of being her guardian.

Groaning, the warrior gritted his teeth and banged his fist against one of the crates in frustration. Then what the hell was he doing spying on her from behind a bunch of boxes? Why was he avoiding her whenever they crossed paths in the decks below? Why did he refuse to let himself be around her when they had the chance to be alone?

Akashii sighed as he recalled his dream. It was the fear. Once again, it was deterring him from acting on his true feelings and pushing him away from the one that he cared about. He knew that it was one of his weaknesses. Master Gadrin had always warned him about letting fear and doubt sway his actions. As a youngling, he was always hesitant and afraid when he was faced with the possibility of failing and for a while it halted his progress as a warrior. Yet after extensive training and guidance from his mentor, he had gotten over his phobia and went on to accomplish great things for his tribe and the Horde. Yet when it came to matters of his heart, Akashii had always remained apprehensive and weak.

He balled his fists tightly as he watched Ki'ra's soft hair whip around her face. No longer, he growled to himself. No longer would he let such fears, whether from events of the past or his own securities, prevent him from pursuing what he knew he wanted. Ki'ra needed him and he needed her in more ways than one. He could not let anything keep him from her.

Drawing a deep breath in his chest, Akashii walked across the deck of the ship toward Ki'ra. He needed to tell her. She needed to know how much he adored and wanted her. If she would be patient with him, he would learn how to suppress the fears that tried to control him.

"Land ho!"

The priestess' eyes snapped open as the loud bellow came from the captain's box. As Ki'ra shook herself from her meditative state, the crimson orbs focused and gazed squarely at Akashii. Both gasped at the same time and the warrior came to an abrupt halt. They stared at one another for a moment, stunned and surprised. Mesmerized in the woman's bright red eyes, Akashii's lips could not help but turn into a smile. Ki'ra merely blinked at him for a moment, and then smiled brightly herself.

"Priestess!"

Ki'ra's head looked to the right as the blood elf Pyreanor came striding up to her. She stood slowly, looking briefly at Akashii once more before turning in the direction of the paladin's outstretched hand. "We've arrived, Priestess Ki'ra," he said with pride in his voice.

The Darkspear Trolls began to gather around the forward railing at the deck, marveling at the sight of the region that many of them had never seen before. There, sprawled across the land of Lordaeron and gleaming like powdered emeralds beneath the bright sunset was the lushly forested region of Quel'thalas.

A/N: So begins a new volume as well as a new chronicle. I will go ahead and tell you it will be entitled "Loa". I figured that 5 chapters for each letter equals 15 chapters, which should be enough to get through this particular upcoming arc. I am really excited about it as it will heavily get into canon established Troll lore, WoW histories, and my own additions to them. This will probably be the last update for a while as I need to get ready for graduation and whatnot and I really want to take my time and give a lot of attention to these next chapters. Please be patient with me! To satiate you, I will be posting the first few chapters of my new story, "Sirens of Azeroth", soon. Look forward to it!