A/n Here you all go my pretties!! The next chapter. I got this written so soon because I've been off school since Monday for St. Patrick's Day. Did any of you do anything exciting?
This is also out sooner because my beta twilight-is-lovee is on holidays.
Just to let you all know it gets a little bit heated at the end. Actually I'd hardly call it heated. It's like a mild pepperoni pizza or something.
Anyway read on!! =]
If You Could See Me Now.
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or Cecelia Ahern's If You Could See Me Now.. This is just my version using Twilight characters. I have changed the storyline but some incidents that occur may seem similar to those that happen in the book.
Chapter 21: Beyond Perfection.
It was bliss, lying here with Bella. Actually, bliss doesn't even come close to describing how it felt lying with her, kissing her, knowing that she loves me. Words can't describe how I'm feeling right now.
All these years I've thought I've been perfectly content helping children. I thought I was complete in myself, that nothing could ever give me a greater joy than seeing my Best Friend's face light up when I've helped them. How wrong I was.
All that matters to me now is Bella. She's my one reason to exist. I live to make her happy and make sure that a frown never crosses her perfect features, not that she isn't unbelievably cute when she pouts.
I know I only have a limited time with her, so the one thing that will help me through this is knowing that she will get over me… eventually. I know she may hurt for a long time, but that's the beauty of being human, you pick up the pieces and move on. She deserves to forget about me. She deserves to get married to someone who her family can actually see.
It's my fault that she will be hurt, because I never intended for Bella to fall in love with me. I knew from the moment I first saw her that she was going to be one of the most special people I would ever meet, and I wasn't wrong. The more time I spent with her, the harder it was to stay away. Then when she started seeing me was the moment I should have distanced myself or stayed away altogether. But, I'm much too selfish for my own good. I told myself that I would leave when all her problems were sorted, when she didn't need me anymore. But now, she needs me more than ever. She loves me, and it's all my fault. I am going to go away. I have no choice in the matter. She is going to be in so much pain when that happens, and I'll be to blame. I can't bear seeing Bella in pain, but knowing that it's because of me and there's nothing I can do about it causes me unimaginable pain. There is no way I can stop her from hurting, because there isn't any way to stop me from leaving.
But what if there was a way? Carlisle and Sarah managed it. Why can't Bella and I?
Of course we can't. It's like Carlisle said, I'm sorting through her problems. I haven't actually talked to her about them; it's more the effect my presence has on her. It's making her realize what she wants and who she needs. It's making her the person she wants to be, and it helped her to take those steps towards reconciling with Charlie and Rosalie.
I did help her realize that what she really wants to do in life is photography. I knew that the day in the meadow, as soon as she took that camera in her hands, she could never be happy displaying someone else's art in the gallery. She could never be satisfied until it was her own art being displayed to the world, bringing joy to people. But that's the kind of person Bella is; a kind, selfless person that always puts other people's cares before her own. It wouldn't be the fact that she was displaying the work she loved and enjoyed doing to everyone just to get some recognition that would bring her the most joy. No, it would be the fact that people would hopefully benefit from her work. She hoped that her work would make people happy or even inspire them to follow their own dreams.
"Edward?" Bella's sweet chiming voice sounded in my head. I jumped slightly. I had almost forgotten that I was still lying on the beach with Bella. I was much too absorbed in my thoughts.
"Yes, dearest, sweetest, most beloved Bella of mine?" I know I went a bit over the top with that greeting but I wanted her to know just how much I really did love her.
"Well, my darling, most charming Edward, tonight is a very special for two reasons. Number one, you love me and I love you, so that automatically makes this the most special night ever, but there's also another amazing thing happening up in the sky, and I think I'd like to take photographs of them. You never know, I might use them for the exhibition."
I slapped myself on the forehead. How silly of me? Of course she would want to record this miraculous night.
"Well, love of mine, do you have your camera with you?"
She grinned sheepishly at me. "It's in the car. I somehow knew I was going to need it tonight. I don't know. It's like I knew I was going to want to remember this night forever."
I wrapped my arm around her and whispered softly in her ear. "That's okay. I know I will definitely remember this forever."
We walked hand in hand to the car, and she went and fetched her camera. She told me to walk on ahead; she'd follow behind soon enough. She wanted to get a few pictures from the sand dunes first before walking along the actual beach. I watched as she took the pictures. Her face was just so cute. It was scrunched up a little in concentration, and then once she had taken the photo, it would relax. She carried on like this for every photograph. It was quite amusing.
I turned my back to her and plopped myself on the sand like before. I heard more clicking noises from the camera and a few minutes later Bella gently sat herself down beside me.
"You finished taking pictures for tonight then?" I asked while pulling her close.
"Uuummm, I think so," she said, resting her head in the crook of my neck.
"Can I see them then?"
"No. Not yet."
"Why?" I whined at her and flashed my puppy dog look at her.
She smiled and said. "You'll see them soon enough. Just not yet. I have to edit them a bit first."
"You know…" I said threateningly. "I could always torture them out of you." At that, I wiggled my fingers at her and she burst out laughing.
"You'd have to catch me first," she said quickly, giving me a chaste kiss on the lips before jumping up and running away from me. It took me a few seconds to process what had just happened. One minute she was snug in my lap, and the next she's away, running, laughing her head off. I jumped up and followed her.
Bella may be fast, but I'm faster.
I quickly caught up with her, grabbed her from behind, and swirled her round and round. "Gotcha," I yelled, and she struggled only slightly in my arms. Bella was gasping from laughing so much.
"Oh, God, I'm too weak from laughing to fight back," she panted. I stopped swirling her around, and she clung to me for support, her shoulders still shaking with amusement.
Once she had calmed down, she looked up at the sky once more. The Delta Aquarids was coming to a close. She sighed and looked at me sadly.
"I think it's time to head home." I nodded in understanding. I was just as reluctant as she was for this night to end. But, it didn't have to end here, did it?
We walked to the car, and I got into the back seat. The door was still open from when Bella had gone to fetch her camera. She looked at me strangely.
"I just feel like having a bit of a stretch," I answered her unasked question. She just shrugged her shoulders and got into the front of the car.
On the drive home, I know I shouldn't have been distracting her, but I couldn't keep my hands of Bella. I would gently brush my hand on her cheek or play with the ends of her hair. After she had given out to me for the third time, I finally settled my head on the shoulder of her seat. She looked back at me quickly and smiled before focusing on the road.
She parked the car in the drive and stepped out. When I didn't move she looked confused. How do I tell her that I can't open doors?
Before I could open my mouth to say anything, she slapped herself on the forehead.
"Of course you can't open the door, the child lock is on," she said shaking her head and then proceeded to open the door for me. I sighed in relief. I had never even thought on the child lock.
I stepped outside and stood beside Bella in front of her house. Neither of us said anything, she just opened the house door and stood aside to let me in. I, being the gentleman that I was, motioned for her to go first. She shook her head wearily and walked on through to the kitchen. I closed the door behind me and followed her.
Bella had the coffee machine on and was standing by the kitchen sink. I walked over to her and wrapped my arms around her waist
before kissing her softly on the lips.
"I love you," I whispered against her lips.
"I love you, too," she whispered back. She pushed herself closer to me and rested her head on my chest. We continued to kiss and cuddle in the kitchen, and forgot all about coffee.
"Don't ever leave me," Bella said softly.
"Not ever."
With that said, her lips captured mine again. Both of us knew what was going to happen. Both of us wanted it to happen. Our lips melted together and her touch sent thrills up my spine. My blood tingled like electricity underneath my skin. Her hands slowly started to unbutton my shirt and her kisses left a trail of fire running from my neck down my chest. I hoisted Bella up onto the counter and my hands ran up and down her body. She raised her hands up and I pulled of her ruined blue dress. My fingers lingered on the lace of her bra before I wrapped my arms around her and lifted her up. She wrapped her legs around me, and we were locked together. We started to make our way up the stairs to her room. My arm hit something in the hall. It fell to the ground and smashed. I set her down and checked to see what had broken.
"We can clear it up later," Bella whispered passionately, and then led me to her room. She sat herself down on the soft covers of her bed and motioned for me to join her. I lay down beside her, and we carried on where we had left off. Bella's hands moved towards the waist of my pants. She helped me remove the rest of my clothing and I, of course did the same for her. We were lying on her bed, seeing each other for the first time. We were no longer just Bella and Edward. We were a man and a woman. We were every man and woman in the world who had ever been lucky enough to find their other half, their soul mate.
I kissed her all over, tasting her, whispering a thousand loving words against her skin.
I kissed just above her left breast where her heart is. "A kiss for the heart, where the wounds are deepest."
I tasted all of Bella that night, and it was beyond perfection.
A/n So what did you all think? Like it? Love it? Hate it? Review and let me know. I need 7 more reviews and we will reach our aim of 500. So you know what that means - I have a new aim of 600 for for the end of this. =]
Just to let you all know this chapter kind of took a life of it's own. I was debating with myself should I or should I not have them sleep together then once I started writing it just happened. I think it kind of fit.
You all realise that I'm only buttering you all up with all these lovey-dovey, rainbows and sunshine dust chapters before the inevitale happens. Is it just me or does anyone else feel the need to smile when someone says sunshine dust?
Anyway review please oh and I want to thank Hellisntthatbadwhenuhavanangel for reading and reviewing nearly every chapter on one sitting. Also to Edward Cullen is my hero who is just new to FF and is writing her own FF and she is just so awesome in real life. Wa-choo to you Manda, Wa-choo!! lol
So please review.
Wa-choo. (That's supposed to be a whip crack in case you couldn't tell. It's my new thing. lol)
Helen =]