I watched Tom pack his cases for tour, desperately trying not to sigh. I didn't want him to leave.
The baby kicked me, almost like he or she was telling me that they didn't like the idea of him going either, but there was nothing I could do, the tour had been planned before the guys had even known about me, how were they supposed to know that by the time they went on tour one of them would have a baby on the way?
Tom picked up his favourite t-shirt, put it in his case... then took it out again.
He walked over to me "You keep this" He sat beside me and held my hand "That way even if you can't see me or hear me, you can at least smell me"
I laughed "That just sounds weird"
"Hmm... maybe Dougie's rubbing off on me"
"We can't have two Dougie's"
Now he laughed, but then went serious "You know I wouldn't go if I could, right?"
I nodded "I know" The baby kicked, almost like he or she were correcting me "I meant we know"
He pulled me closer and put his hand on my bump "You be good for your mum while I'm gone" He said "She can easily call me and tell me if you're playing up"
I smiled, I loved the way he would speak to the baby, like they were already here.
He looked at me now "I'll call you every day, ok? If there's any problems, I will be coming straight back"
"You can't..."
"I can" He got up and looked out the window "Carrie's here"
Carrie was staying at our house while the boys were away, her arriving made a lump develop in my throat, I really didn't want him to go, I went over to him and hugged him tightly, the tears rolling down my face.
He lifted my head to look at me "Please don't cry"
"I'm trying not to"
My head still in his hands, he kissed me, like we were saying goodbye here, alone, instead of in front of all the others. He wiped my tears and kissed my eyes "I love you, just remember that"
"I will. I love you too"
"And I'll remember that" He went to kiss me but the doorbell sounded, he sighed "I'll get that, come down when you're ready" He took his case and headed downstairs
I sat on our bed and hugged his t-shirt, we hadn't been apart for a long period of time since we'd got together. But I knew I couldn't just sit around and mope, this wouldn't be the last time that he'd be away... I had to grow up. I took a deep breath and headed downstairs.
Everyone was stood out on the driveway, saying goodbye, I came out the front door and went over to Tom, he put his arms around me and carried on talking to Danny. Just him hugging me was enough.
"You don't want to be apart do you?" Danny said
"No" We said together
"But Harry's right" Tom said "It's tiring enough for us being on tour, let alone a pregnant woman"
"I'll be fine with Carrie, I promise"
"I know... just wish I could stay with you..."
Harry came running over "Guys we've got to go"
Danny went to go talk to Georgia again, me and Tom looked at each other as Dougie came over to us
"I'll let you say bye first Doug" Tom moved away from me slightly
My brother hugged me "You'll call us if anything happens, right?"
"I will" I said "But I have Carrie, we'll be fine"
"Hm, alright. But if anything..."
"Yes" I smiled "Now go on, have fun"
"Ok, ok, be good" He walked over to the massive car, waved and climbed in to it... now only me and Tom were left.
He held both of my hands and kissed me, it was like we were sharing all our kisses that we wouldn't be able to share as he was away
"Call me when you get there" I said in to his chest
"I will. Call you every day" He looked in to my eyes, he didn't have to say what he was thinking. He kissed me one last time then got in to the car.
Me, Carrie, Georgia, Izzy and Crystal all stood and waved them goodbye. We stood silently, watching the car drive away, we each gave a tiny sigh and went inside, prepared to not have men around for the next few weeks
"Carrie! You're mums here!"
"She's early!"
"Look at the clock"
"...maybe not"
Clitter, clatter, clitter, clatter. This was the sound of Carrie walking down the stairs "Has Tom called yet?" She pulled on her jacket
"Not yet, but this is an early appointment, I doubt they're even awake yet"
"True"
We climbed in to the back of the car, putting our seat belts on, Carrie said "He needs to call so we know whether to ask what the baby is or not"
"I'm sure he'll call Carrie" Debbie said "And if he doesn't, we'll call..."
Tom's ring tone came blasting from my pocket, good timing
"Sorry, I over slept" He yawned "Are you at the hospital yet?"
"Not yet, we're in the car though" I said "Maybe you should get some more sleep, you sound really tired"
"Are you sure? I'll survive"
"No, no, you get some sleep..." I saw Carrie mouthing something out the corner of my eye "Oh, but first, do you want me to find out what the baby is?"
"Yes" He said automatically "Mainly because I want to know, but the guys do too"
I laughed "Ok. Get some more sleep, I'll call you in a couple of hours and let you"
"Alright, love you"
"Love you too" I said as we pulled up outside the hospital