Dreaming of a Day – by Darlin
Chapter Twenty-One – Truths in Unexpected Places
A/N – It took me a while to figure out where I was going with this once I discussed this with my beta Skyz. I've changed the direction a bit so had to rewrite. I appreciate everyone who's still reading and will try to be more prompt with updates now that I've worked it out. In fact, next update should be this weekend.
xox
How many times had he felt at a complete loss since he'd hooked up with Ororo? Victor thought it was too many times. He didn't like that kind of confusion – being jealous at the beach, taking care of her when she was sick, not knowing if he'd say something that would make her take off for a week and now. Things were way too complicated. What had happened to him? Letting a woman run him through the wringer like she was? It reminded him of Mystie. He hated Mystie. He hated anything that reminded him of Mystie. He wished he could hate Ororo.
She was gone and Logan had chased after her but he would never chase after any woman. Let Logan go after her like the devoted slave he was. He could talk some sense into her. Maybe she'd listen. The runt always had a way with making you see the logical side of things even when you didn't want to. Maybe she would listen. Maybe she'd come back.
Right. Like he wanted her to come back! Hah! And what? Lecture him, blame him? Hate him? He already hated himself more than she could ever hate him. He hated Jean too and if he ever saw her again that skank was going to be real sorry for messing him up like she had.
All these thoughts circled in his mind non stop, unrelenting. The studio apartment mocked him as he paced the floor. Everything about it shouted Ororo. He wanted to hate her. This whole mess was her fault not his! She shouldn't have been so clingy and demanding. Always there bothering him, suffocating him is what she'd done! What had she expected? She should have given him some space.
Should have. He hated himself. He needed to get out of there. He needed to stop thinking about her, about being sick, maybe dying. He needed to beat on someone. Jean. He wished he did beat women. He'd kill her. He wished he could hate Ororo. He'd kick her out, tell her they were finished.
He laughed. They were finished. She wasn't ever coming back. She'd send Logan back to get her things. She didn't have much to get though. Her luggage. She never kept anything there not even tampons. Well, maybe she should have! His thoughts took a contradictory turn. Maybe if she'd let him know she would be there he wouldn't have turned to Jean. Maybe she should've been up front about what was going on between them.
"Ah, hell!" he spat out. He knew he would have balked had she'd said anything about them being together even though they were and he'd been happy about it. Even angry he couldn't deny that.
Nothing gave him peace. He looked around nervously at the apartment feeling the need to rip down those curtains she'd put up everywhere. He wanted to kick over the table covered in a white table cloth like some fancy restaurant. He wanted to send the glass holding a handful of flowers in the middle of the table smashing across the room. He wanted to destroy every little bit of evidence that she had ever existed but he couldn't.
After standing in the middle of the room for some minutes looking at his apartment he realized the place summed up what was his life. Orderly, neat, everything fitted; it was good – because of Ororo. He'd been well fed, well loved, at least in the beginning. But she had to go and change. When she'd stopped wanting to have sex she should have known he would look elsewhere he thought conveniently not remembering that it was Logan's presence in the little apartment that had put a damper on their love life and that was after his one night stand with Jean.
His anger made him irrational, his need to justify his actions made him doubly so. It was easier to blame her after all if he hadn't known her he never would've gotten involved with Jean. If she had just left everything alone and not put her imprint on his place and his life he wouldn't have gone to that stupid anniversary party or looked at Jean twice.
Despite the anger coursing through him that thought brought him back to reality. He knew that wasn't true. He would have looked Jean over as many times as he'd wanted – any woman for that matter but he wouldn't have wanted her, he wouldn't have slept with her. No. He wouldn't have wanted Jean ever if Ororo had been there for him. She should've been there for him. She was always going off on those flights and leaving the country like her job was all that mattered! What about taking care of him? Huh? Taking care of what mattered?
But that was just it. She didn't care about him. She was acting like him sleeping with Jean bothered her cause all women had to play that role, going into hysterics because they loved that dramatic crap but she didn't care a thing about him. She wasn't there for him; she wouldn't even have sex with him any more unless they were in the bathroom. He should've figured it out then. She was probably seeing someone else! Probably screwing a different man in every city she stopped off in. Hell, he was probably her California squeeze.
Well, to hell with that! He'd show her! He'd keep on showing her too! Two could play that little game. He knew a dozen or more women who would beg him to come over and all he had to do was pick up the phone. Better than that he knew every last stripper at Xavier's! Yeah, that's right they'd all beg him to choose them for the night. The freaky Stacy X, the uppity White Queen, that sexy Revanche and the cute little Threnody, even that know it all Sage would be begging him to spend a little time with them and expect nothing more than that from him! They all knew what a great lover he was. They would even share him too after a few cat fights. In fact he liked it when they fought over him. Yeah. That's just what he needed. And so Victor grabbed his jacket and took off in his Spyder. The day he let Ororo or any woman get to him was the day he'd be ten feet under. To hell with her!
It didn't take him long to get to Xavier's. Not even with having to stop for the ticket the cop gave him. The ticket didn't help his mood. He found a place to park just around the corner and stomped up to the strip club shoving past the small throng of people indiscriminately and none too gently. One person he pushed so hard that the poor man stumbled and fell. The man was dressed in a black floor length robe tied at the waist much like a monk's. The hood to the cape covered his face so that he looked the very image of death save he had no scythe. A bad omen, Victor thought as he gave the cloaked man a disdainful look before thrusting the door to Xavier's open.
Pieces of white papers, flyers the man had been trying to hand out, flew up then scattered all along the sidewalk some skipping off in a sudden breeze but they as well as the image of death were ignored by the few people that remained. It was a common enough sight to any who frequented the strip club this mysterious man warning them of the error of their ways, of their sinful life and not very much appreciated. Victor was used to seeing people staking out the abortion clinics, he'd even seen mothers with their young children being forced to hand out cookies at the adult book store he used to go to, the cookies weren't any good usually, but this man always irritated him so he had shoved him extra hard. Unfortunately it hadn't done anything to assuage the emotions that were plaguing him.
Xavier's was Victor's favorite hide out, better than Harry's and Domino's couldn't even compete. It was the one place that had everything he wanted – it was dark, smoking was allowed, plenty of cheap drinks and naked women in all shapes and sizes and colors. And it was here that he had come to drown his anger and the unfamiliar gnawing feeling of despair he was being overwhelmed with. He planned on topping the night off with any one or two of the bevy of women who all smiled at him despite his brutal behavior as he pushed his way through to the back of the club.
It wasn't his usual seat. Usually he, with Logan or Cain, sat right up front where the women could shake their wares in their faces and shout out propositions. Just then all he wanted was an isolated table in the darkest of corners. He'd hoped to be left alone to drink in peace for a while but to his great annoyance he saw one of the strippers standing there in the back. Platinum blonde hair brushed her shoulders and she was almost naked wearing only a skimpy top in white leather that covered almost nothing and a pair of very low cut matching leather pants that looked like she'd been poured into them.
He couldn't help but give an appreciative grunt as he watched her. She looked appropriately slutty and ready and it was a ravishing sight after what he'd been through with Ororo but something was off. Vic Junior wasn't up to saluting like he usually was. He gave a dry chuckle when he quickly saw why. She didn't look quite as ravishingly as he'd thought at first because she was cussing out at a man wearing dark red sunglasses. She sounded like and looked like she wanted to kill him.
Feeling up to the job Victor started to go over and offer his services but then he stopped. He wondered why anyone would be wearing sunglasses in a dark club. If the guy was trying not to be noticed he stood out like a sore thumb so Victor figured that couldn't be it. Was the dude blind then? But why would a blind man be at a strip joint of all places? Victor shook his head. Emma was crazy enough to do a blind man just for the money as money hungry as she was but it was none of his business and besides two of the waitress cum strippers were sauntering up to him, both with big hopeful smiles. Yeah, the night might not be a total loss after all.
Only Emma wouldn't shut up and the crude words she was spewing were starting to get on his nerves. There was nothing worse than a foul mouth woman and Emma was cussing like a sailor or a jarhead for that matter. The only time he wanted to hear a woman use the f word was in the bedroom. He still hadn't gotten Ororo to loosen up to that point yet but once she'd . . .
"Just leave her the hell alone!" Victor suddenly shouted as if he were trying to block out his own thoughts.
He was angry with the intrusion, the noise, Emma and her scantily clad tired self and that he couldn't stop thinking about Ororo no matter what he did. It was specifically why he'd chosen Xavier's – all the beautiful women there, enough to keep him occupied all night and into the next morning. He didn't need Ororo. Hell, it wasn't like he'd been seeing Jean on the side. She should've at least given him a chance to explain himself. Not that he could make the situation any better but still . . .
"Were . . . you talking to me?" the man in the sunglasses asked, in no way intimidated.
Victor laughed. "Yeah, you scooter. You wanna make somethin' outta it?"
"Victor, darling mind your own business. I can take care of this," Emma said without turning to acknowledge her would be knight in shining armor.
"You know him too?" the sunglasses man exclaimed.
"Scott, hon I probably know every man in this place. It's how I make my living. What do you not understand about that? You knew this when you decided to leave your little mousey ex for me so why are you in such a huff now?"
"You know what I mean!" Scott muttered.
"Scott, dear, dear boy, what's life without taking a few risks? You're not dead – yet. Now you'll live with more appreciation for what little time you may have left and with more joy. We'll have more fun. It's not the end of the world. You'll see."
"What . . . ? How can you say something like that when . . . ?" his voice fell then faded off. He couldn't go on. He hung his head as if he were burdened with a terrible weight and could see no way out.
"Shush, darling. Mommy has to go entertain the troops. Victor what're you drinking tonight? Beer or whiskey? The way you look you could use a few shots."
"Emma!" Scott cried but she ignored him as she turned her attention to Victor.
The two women who had planned on supplying Victor's every wish had scattered as soon as they'd heard him yelling threats. They and everyone that worked there knew better than to mess with him when he was in a bad mood but Emma felt she was the equal of anyone and had no fear of him or anyone. She cupped Victor's chin in a hand and winked.
"Well, what is it going to be, Victor?"
"Emma, what do you think you're doing?" Scott shouted as he grabbed her by the arm and swung her around to face him.
"Making a living, Scott now let go of me!"
"You heard her blind boy, let her go!" Victor shouted as he leapt up ready to pound his frustration out even if it was on a helpless blind man. That might even prove to be fun.
"I'm not blind," Scott said. "And you don't know what she's trying to do to you, man! You don't know what'll happen if you . . . ! Just listen to me and leave her alone! Emma, this isn't right! You know it! You can't keep doing this! You've got to get help or something!"
"Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!" Emma yelled, covering her ears so she wouldn't have to listen to him.
"Okay, that's it, dude!" Victor socked Scott once, hard in the jaw and the glasses went soaring as Scott went down.
"Victor!" Emma shrieked.
"What? He ain't blind! He said so himself!" Victor said, hoping Scott would get up so he could knock him down again.
"You are such a Neanderthal, Victor!"
"What? I'm helping you out woman! You feel that way then get outta here! Take your little douche bag and get the f . . . just get outta here before I kill you and him both."
"Victor, calm down," Emma urged as she flagged a waitress down.
"Emma, Emma," Scott moaned as he tried fumbled around on the floor for his glasses.
"Calm down, Scott. Sage, call a cab and have Guido help me," Emma directed the waitress that came running over.
The woman nodded and hurried off. In the meantime Emma picked up Scott's glasses and jabbed them on his face. Shortly a man almost twice the size of Victor came up to them. He was bald except for a lock of blonde hair that curled down onto his forehead. He had on a small pair of round glasses so thick you could barely make out his eyes. Oddly the glasses in no way belied the sense of power he obviously had. His chest and arms were massive though his waist was tiny and his legs looked even smaller somewhat like the Barbarian Twins of old. All in all he looked almost comedic in a very imposing way and the slight grin he wore as he sauntered up only enforced the impression. Half imp, half killer was what Emma called him behind his back.
"Be a good boy and take him outside will you, you strong guy you?" Emma cooed.
"Sure, no problemo. You's want he should be put on the list?" Guido replied.
"No. No, he's okay. He had a little too much to drink this time that's all."
"Xavier gonna be okay with that? You know how he feels about the kid."
"You know I have Charles wrapped around my little finger," Emma laughed.
"Whatever ya say," Guido said then with a nod to Victor he tossed a protesting Scott over his shoulder and sauntered off.
"You better go after your man," Victor laughed.
"Oh, he'll be fine. Scott's like a little puppy dog. Kick him and he'll come running back eager to lick me . . . hmm . . . you know what I mean."
"Sounds sick to me."
"No. Victor it's called love."
"Right. Sick."
"Sometimes. Sometimes not. It depends. Sometimes you take what you can when you haven't had love before. Scott loves me more than even he thought and even more than I guessed at. It's beyond incredible to be loved like that, Victor."
"Sound's pathetic."
"Not really. I make him happy, he actually makes me happy. What could be pathetic about that?"
"You're both sick."
"By the way you've been acting, Victor darling, it looks like you're sick yourself or you're suffering from an extreme case of denial."
A low growl rumbled deep in his throat but he looked away, agitated his eyes roving over the crowd.
"Ah ha! So Sage was right! I told her she was reading more into your absences than she should but what do you know! She was right!" Emma laughed.
"What the hell you talkin' about?"
"You haven't been around for months. Logan we understand, he's completely whipped. Cain is always on the prowl but he's travels a lot now that he and Tom started working together. But you, Victor you're the constant. You're the horn dog. You don't care who spreads her legs for you as long as you get it regularly," Emma said ending her commentary with a casual shrug.
"You're crazy. Crazy as all the rest of these broads."
Emma crossed her arms inadvertently pushing her breast up to be viewed easier. Victor frowned, not even noticing the display.
"Just get me a beer will ya?" he growled.
"Oh, Victor, Victor, Victor! Look at me will you?"
"What? What?"
She let her arms fall and her breast jiggled slightly as she laughed. Then with a swift movement her arms came up behind her neck and she released the one button that held the tiny leather top she wore.
"Hey! What're you doing?" Victor hissed and to their surprise he quickly fumbled at her top attempting to put it back on for her. It was a clumsy attempt and he quickly realized it wasn't going to work.
"You're in love," Emma said very simply. She smiled which surprised them both again. There was no harsh attack or I told you so's.
"You're crazy," Victor mumbled, averting his eyes as she fastened her top back into place.
"There isn't anything wrong with being in love, Victor."
"You don't know what you're talkin' about!"
"Tell me, why are you here? Did you and your girlfriend get into a fight?"
He looked at her begrudgingly.
"Ah, I thought so. Well, Victor darling the best thing about a fight is the sweet make up session. Go home and make love to her but make sure you tell her you're sorry first."
"You don't know what you're talking about," Victor grunted, this time not as adamantly.
"So it's a bad fight then. Well, love cures all ills. Apologize, bring her flowers, candy – Godiva's – and go down on her a few times. You're the best there is when you want to be. She'll forgive you believe me."
"It ain't that simple," Victor found himself saying.
"Love makes anything possible. Do you love her?"
He opened his mouth, started to speak then closed it tight. He sighed deeply then nodded.
"You always know what I'm thinkin'. How do you do that?"
"You're a book to me, Victor. We're too much alike. You've no idea how I messed up with Scott but he's here every night trying to make it work. If he can still love me after what I did to him . . . trust me, what I did to him is nothing compared to what you may have done to your girlfriend."
"You . . . you don't know – it's bad, real bad."
"Victor, I did something so bad – something that might . . . Believe me what I did was unforgivable but he loves me. That Boy Scout loves me with all my faults and idiosyncrasies. If she loves you she'll forgive you. Trust me."
"But it's not . . . I mean you just don't know, Em."
"I do know you're not the same man you used to be. You can't even look at me naked! Victor, face up to your mistake. I know you. You're a loyal friend, the best. A man that goes out of his way like you do for a friend will die for the woman he loves. And for all your bark you're a decent man. What's more I believe you're not the type to be unfaithful once you fall. You're too loyal. And looking at you – see, you're almost blushing!"
"I am not!"
"You so are! Oh, Victor you have fallen so hard you don't know how to get back up do you? Tell her it won't happen again; swear on your life or whatever you hold sacred and hold on to her with every trick in the book."
"She won't believe me."
"She will if she loves you. She will if you show her. Tell her you love her. Every woman needs to hear that. Maybe she'll surprise you. It's hard to accept love for people like you and I but when we do it is the very best feeling in the world and nothing will ever top that – not all the sex in the world or all the money either. Now go home and don't forget the flowers – oh, and champagne too. It never hurts to get a girl a little tipsy first."
With that Emma flounced off feeling rather pleased with herself and hoping she could catch Scott before his cab came to collect him. Victor sat back down, his eyes following her then after a few seconds he got up and hurried after her. Once outside in the cold air the black cloaked man saw him and stepped back almost falling into the path of a cab as it pulled up.
"Zee wages of sin are deaf! Zee wages of sin are deaf!" the man cried.
Another bad omen, Victor thought as he contemplated punching the daylights out of the guy. Guido and Emma helped Scott into the cab while he mumbled about truth and something else but all Victor really caught before the cab sped off were the words –
"Listen to that guy, Emma! He's right! The wages of sin are death!"