'I've never been more sure about anything in my whole life.' Replied Matt giving her a kiss on the forehead and turning out the light as the two settled down to blissful sleep together for the first time as a couple.
Matt had managed to keep in touch with Judge John Winters and their relationship resembled something of a father and son bond, the judge and Matt were sat down on Matt's couch watching a football game. John was sitting beside his surrogate son and preparing himself to breach what was probably the most sensitive topic he could talk about yet. Matt noticed that John was constantly glancing back and forth from the television to Casey's face.
'John, do you want to ask me something?' asked Casey suspiciously.
'Um…yeah. Matt I've been meaning to talk to you about this for a little while now,' started John anxiously. 'After everything that's happened recently I think that it could be a good idea for you to maybe think about seeing a therapist…'
'I don't need a therapist, I've been fine for years.' Casey snapped back.
'Matt, I know you're not okay.' Replied John calmly. 'You remember when I came to look after Jack for the day after you had been on that long shift and you were sleeping upstairs. I heard you screaming, Matt. You were having nightmares, begging me not to hurt you. I tried to wake you up but you kept pushing me off of you in your sleep and calling me Callum, I've never seen someone have such a bad nightmare so I spoke to Mary. She told me that you've always had them since you were seven and you first went to stay with her. Don't you want them to stop?'
'It's fine I can deal with them, I know what I'm doing with this. Like you said I've been living with them since I was just a kid.' Insisted Casey totally resistant to having to talk about the problems with anyone let alone a therapist.
'What about Jack, Matthew?' asked John desperate for a turning point in the conversation. 'What do you think will happen when Jack wakes up in the middle of the night and hears you screaming for someone who isn't even there to stop hitting you, what if he tries to wake you up and you push him away and he falls and hurts himself? He won't trust you anymore, he'll start being scared of you and I know, I know you don't want that and neither do I and as far as I can tell this is the only way to stop that from happening. I know this isn't what you want to hear but it's the truth, you need to talk to someone and if you're not going to do it for me than do it for Jack, he need you and you need help.'
When John finished Matt had tears streaming down his face as he realised what he could have done to the one thing that mattered to him most, his little boy. He didn't want his son to feel the fear that he had felt as a kid, he didn't want him to be scared of his father like he had. He wanted his son to grow up knowing the type of man that his father, Gregory, had been and having a surrogate grandfather in judge Winters, his son should know who his grandmother is and his aunt Christie.
'I'll do it.' Said Matt. 'I'll go to therapy, for Jack.'
'Thank you Matthew, I know a guy who can help you out with that I'll give him a call and get you set up for a time when I can look after Jack.' Promised John pleased that Matt had seen the light. 'Speaking of Jack, where is he?'
'He's upstairs taking a nap, he'll probably be waking up in a minute. I'm going to go get him actually.' Answered Matt.
Casey made his way up the stairs into his recently refurbished spare room which had now become Jack's bedroom. The green walls had a jungle themed mural stretching across them which had been painted by one of his construction worker friends for Jack. The little boy was fast asleep on the bed in the corner of the bedroom but woke up when he heard Matt entering the room and sitting on the edge of the bed.
'Daddy!' said Jack jumping towards his father and raising his arms to be picked up by Matt, his messy blond hair falling into his sparkling blue eyes.
'Hey, buddy. Lets go see grandpa John!' replied Matt lifting up his son still in his pyjamas and carrying him down the stairs, the boys small hands still holding onto his favourite toy, his father's truck.
Two weeks later Matt was sitting in a comfortable armchair in his therapist Alex Jensen's office, they had been sitting in silence for the last fifteen minutes only speaking to greet each other.
Finally Matt opened his mouth and spoke. 'Are we going to sit here for the whole time in silence or what?' asked Matt defensively.
'Well, I was waiting for you to start talking to me but I'm getting the feeling that you don't really want to be here.' Said Alex looking at the lieutenant before him as Matt picked as the stitching on the arms of his chair. 'If you're not planning on talking then why did you come here?'
'I came for my son.' Stated Matt plainly not caring to elaborate.
'So, you have a son. What's he like?' asked Alex looking for something to talk about with Matt.
'His name is Jack, he's four.' Answered Casey smiling as he spoke of his son. 'I adopted him about three months ago after my team and I rescued him from a house fire. He's the most important thing in my life.'
'I can tell from the way you talk about him, it's the only time I have seen you smile since you came in here. You light up when you talk about him. John told me that you have nightmares. Do you want to tell me what they're about?' inquired Alex hoping talking about Jack would make Matt feel more comfortable about speaking to him.
'My stepfather, Callum.'