Chapter Twenty-One

It seemed to take forever. Two other women came out before she finally saw the dark hair of her love. She was adjusting her uniform. It was grey here not tan like at Litchfield. She looked up and pushed her glasses up at the same time. Piper's breath caught in her throat when she looked her in the eyes. One of her eyes was black from what Piper knew to be a fist. She gulped down, swallowing her rage hard. Alex walked towards her with that faint smile that broke Piper's heart. She was wearing a uniform that fit her perfectly...too, so Piper could recognize that she had it taken in here and there. Alex had spiffied up to see her girl. Her eyes darted back up to her face and the bruise made her stiffen again.

"I'm fine, it doesn't even hurt anymore," she said as she reached out to take Piper in her arms. Piper reached around her body and pulled her close, running her hands up her back..along her shoulders, checking she was whole as they pressed forward.

"Oh my God, you smell so damn good...and your sweater IS very soft," Alex murmured in her hair. She moved her head so she kissed her beauty fish tat. Piper shivered all over and clung to her harder. She heard the CO clear his throat to warn them to stop. Piper clung to her more and turned to bury her face in her hair. She was crying but didn't want to take her hands away from her Alex to wipe her face.

"Enough inmate!" he finally barked at them. "You're going to get a SHOT and have your visitation cut short if you keep hugging."

Piper looked up and over at him with her eyes flushed with tears. " Please Officer, we're sorry….I haven't seen her and...well I was worried." He seemed to recognize Piper and his eyes got wide.

"Of course, Miss Chapman...just follow the rules, you can hug again for 30 seconds at the end of your visit," he looked down. " You get lots of time today." Piper smiled at him and Alex motioned for her to sit down. Reluctantly she dropped Piper's hand. Alex looked at her own hand for a few minutes.

"Shit, even letting go of your hand hurt," she whispered quietly. Piper remembered how it felt to see Alex again after she left her in Chicago. Now, she can relate on how fucking hard it was to go back into a prison after being free...but Alex is so worth it.

"Before we start to talk about all of our stuff. I have something to ask you," Piper took a deep breath and looked up at Alex, finally wiping her eyes. She wanted Alex to see joy on her face. So she looked at her and let all of her feeling show. Alex blushed some under the scrutiny then seemed to be in awe of what she saw on Piper's face. "Alex Pearl Vause, I love you more now than I did when I was 23. I don't know how except that maybe we know each other and ourselves better now. I forgive you for all the pain you caused, I am working on forgiving myself for all the pain I caused us...and I'd like to spend the rest of my life filling your life with Joy. Will you have me?"

Alex looked at her for a moment perplexed. "I thought you said you were going to wait...What are you asking me?"

Piper leaned forward on the small table. "You know what I'm asking Vause."

Alex smiled. " A girl still likes to hear it Chapman!" Piper laughed and leaned back...she then slid out of her chair and looked up at her. She watched as Alex paled and swallowed hard as if she couldn't believe her girl was doing this.

"Alex, will you marry me?"

Alex smiled at her and then nodded yes...finding her voice she said, "Yes." Piper wanted to hug her again and kiss but she looked over at the CO. He sighed rolled his eyes and turned his back on them suddenly fascinated with the snack machine. Piper bolted up and kissed her on the mouth. All the people around them clapped. PIper blushed and quickly sat back down before the CO could change his mind. She was beaming.

"You have lousy timing Pipes. I said yes, but I'm not doing this here. I want a wedding in a church, with friends and family there….well friends, I could care less if my aunt and cousin show," Alex said dryly.

"We will see about the family thing...my parents have evolved some but realism is necessary. Don't worry, you're getting out baby," Piper assured her. Alex nodded and then asked her to tell her all about her cottage -saying she assumed they'd be living there. Piper described the place, the library and water near. Alex listened completely enraptured. Piper asked her for details about Danbury too. She told Piper how she made sure to get in on the cook's good side. Her name was Pop and she wasn't Russian but Italian. Piper told her about how Nicky called recently and everyone was hanging in there. She said they heard rumors the government was taking Litchfield back from MCC and that all of them would be moved soon.

"So many may come here. I checked with my source at the DOJ and there are 75 beds available here..more if they transfer some men from the facility to Rikers-not a good transfer for them, but I was assured it would be short timers that live in the City...so would be better for their families," she explained. Alex seemed impressed about her 'sources' and Piper went into great detail about her online posts and vlogs. Alone together, she leaned in and told Alex about Kubra and Aydin's family. She could see Alex settle more in her seat and feel some of the tension leak from her body.

"My lawyer said they were petitioning to reopen my plea deal. It seems the firm you hired has considerable political clout," Alex explained with a grin. Piper shrugged. She was fortunate and she was going to spend the majority of her money helping those less fortunate. Piper told her about her non-profit and how she was using her mother and background to fund raise for others like Women's Prison Association. Finally, she told her in detail about her testimony. Alex listened and her face seemed so bright and a little confused.

"What?"

Alex shook her head then said, "Pipes...look at what all you've done since you got out? I know your Gran's money has helped but it's you that came up with the plan...it's you that put together the foundation. You are making change happen. I'm so impressed and so fucking proud of you. I'm a little worried I don't have anything to really offer."

Piper looked at her for a moment then said, "You offer me support and a love that humbles me to my bones." Alex blushed again and looked down at her hands. Piper knew she had a lot of time to sit in here and worry. She could keep busy with her crusade. She had to remember where Alex was still. Piper closed her eyes a moment and then decided to plow ahead.

"I want to go back to making my soaps. Polly and I are talking again...she broke it off with Larry. I loved coming up with ideas and making them together. I think we could find a market for them overseas as well...especially resorts. I happen to know someone with a great ability to market a product...something I completely suck at by the way...I will send you a few magazine subscriptions along with the books I'm sending...so you can get the feel of the products."

"Are you making up a job for me?" she said with a smirk. She had made Piper work as an errand girl, getting money from Western Union, getting new burner phones...things she left out of her testimony to the Feds. Piper may have received a bigger sentence.

"You'll need one for parole….but I would also like to do something with you. I will always be an advocate for prison reform, you're right I am good at it. However, I want to make something too...something with you...is that wrong?" Piper wanted to make sure she wasn't steamrolling Alex. Her lover just looked at her and reached out to push some hair from her face. The CO cleared his throat again.

"Someone should get that guy a cough drop," Piper murmured but she leaned back in her chair, further away from Alex's perfect fingers.

"He is one of the better ones," Alex said with a smile. They both seemed to think of Officer Bailey at the same time and they both got quiet.

"I'm seeing a therapist. I know you aren't big on that...but it is helping me- for the most part. I seem to do better when we can talk regularly," she admitted. Alex looked at her for a long while.

"What makes you think I'm not big on it?"

Piper snorted, " You once said that you thought it was a scam, to pay someone to listen to you come to your own revelations was a crock, but the meds you could get from them were okay."

She shook her head. "It scares me sometimes how well you remember our conversations from our love affair," Alex leaned forward as she spoke. Piper leaned up again as well, to be closer to her. Automatically her eyes fell to her lips and she closed them briefly, still able to recall what it was like to feel them.

"I relived our relationship in my mind constantly. I never spoke to anyone about it though. It was mine and mine alone. You were the memory that accessed to remind myself that I could be happy. I tried so hard to live the way you taught me...but legit with no drug lords or threats. I worked my ass off at being myself. I pissed off everyone at some point- my relationship with my parents stayed the same. I created this persona….Piper without Alex...Larry's Pipes," she swallowed again and took a deep breath. " I chose safety over passion...yet you were always in my head."

Alex reached forward and with two fingers lightly stroked the material on Piper's sleeve. She remembered doing the same thing to her when she visited her in Litchfield. It was that conversation that landed her back in prison. If Piper had waited...Alex would be out, escaped but free and she'd be out as well. Her gut twisted again when she realized all over that Alex is in there because of her.

"I chose to buy the gun Piper. I chose to point it at the door of my own apartment at the parole officer- that yes you sent to my door, but he made random checks all the time Pipes. I wasn't packed to go...after seeing you I was paralyzed...I couldn't leave you. So yeah you helped but ultimately, it is all on me. You told me before we ever left New York that you didn't want to participate in my business….and I pushed you. All I can say is that I fell in love with you and by the time I realized how much you meant to me, I was in over my head. I fucked us both over because I was too damn weak to let you go...so as you said I'm working on forgiving myself," Alex answered looking Piper in the eyes so she could see much she loves her. "Are you wearing one of your lotions now?"

Piper blinked and then nodded. "Yes, I have a few boxes that were in storage. It is the um Chamomile and Wild Berry." Alex smiled at the name and then they started brainstorming over a new product name. The time seemed to fly by and when the buzzer sounded Piper felt her throat closing as panic started to rise. Alex stood up with everyone else and looked down at the frozen Piper.

"Pipes baby you alright?" Alex crouched down beside her. Piper reached out to clutch onto Alex's arms.

"What if they treat you differently now? What if after I-"

Alex made a soothing sound and quieten Piper's panic. People were starting to move to allow the other shift of visitations to take place. There was a pressing need to move so the others could have their time. Piper knew this but she also knew if she stood up and left, she may never see Alex again.

"Fuck," Alex said under her breath when she saw Piper's face. "Look at me, I'm here, breathe Piper. Oh baby….it's okay kid. I'm going to be fine. I'll call you after dinner. I still got time on my account and what I had in commissary did transfer," she told her details of things. The officer walked over slowly but still Piper jumped as he approached. Alex was on the floor, down on one knee beside her chair. Piper actually had a flash of how she could get between them quickly.

"She's having a little panic attack...please don't touch her. Please don't she is getting up and we are going to say goodbye for now," Alex told him. Piper swallowed and closed her eyes.

"I'm sorry." she whispered as then she took a deep breath and tried to focus on how real Alex's hand felt in her own.

"It's okay. I am a vet and I've had my share of bad moments. I know this place must be one big trigger. I'm going to let some families come in..you have a few minutes inmate Vause," he said before moving away.

"Good...take a deep breath...I'm going to be fine Pipes."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I've had them since I got out...is one reason I'm seeing a therapist...but maybe I need to get one closer to the cottage," she admitted. She stood up and blushed so embarrassed. "I'm a fucking mess."

"You're my fucking mess...and I'm sure I am going to need mega help when I get out. Are you driving yourself?" Alex looked suddenly very concerned.

"No I have security with me and they're driving," she answered. Alex tensed some but pulled her close for a hug. Piper whispered it wasn't Nicole, that today was a family gathering. Alex laughed some and hugged Piper harder.

She pulled away from her and dropped her arms, stepping back. "Talk to you soon. I love you and thank you for asking me to be yours." She winked at Piper and all she could do is nod back silently. She smiled at her, not wanting her to see a sad face before she went back inside. The door shut behind her and Piper turned, bumping into someone by accident. The officer helped Piper exit and she made her way out into the sun. She didn't fall apart until she got inside the car. Maria was great and drove Piper to the city. She drove Piper to her parent's house and it was her mom that got her out of the car and inside the house.

Cal came over and sat with her a good long while, talking on and on about being a father. Piper listened and then quietly told him...knowing her parents were listening from the living room. She told him of her joy of seeing Alex...about how she had a black eye….about the proposal and acceptance. He was genuinely happy for her and she didn't care to know what her parents felt at that moment.

"What happened?"

"I had a panic attack when we had to say goodbye. I scared the shit out of Alex and could have messed up future visitation," she admitted. Cal took her phone and made a reminder for her to call her doctor in the morning.

"I doubt you messed up future visitation, I remember Mom smacked you squarely across the face ...still got to visit if she wanted," Cal said in a soothing manner. Piper laughed at him and then her mom came in to tell Piper she was eating dinner there. She nodded agreeing and knew that would be the end of the discussion tonight. It was a relief.

It was in the middle of dinner when Alex called her. Piper accepted and got up to leave the table. Her mother started to protest but her father reminded her how they would always stop whatever they were doing to talk to Piper when she was inside.

"Hey how are you?" she asked after accepting the call. Alex laughed softly.

"Hello my fiance...I am fine. Where are you? Are you alright?" she countered. Piper relaxed and leaned against the back porch post.

"I'm okay...and I'm at my parent's place. I'm standing on my back porch. I used to sit out here at Christmas and talk to you..both times, we spent it apart, remember? Shit...I missed it last year in the SHU...we have a terrible track record with that holiday," Piper bemused.

"Seeing you today...it lifted me up so much," Alex replied. Piper smiled at the phone. "You did ask me to marry you right? I didn't dream it."

Piper felt a tear slide down her cheek and she wiped it away smiling, "Nope You didn't dream it..and you said yes Vause, don't forget that part...I never...ever will." Alex made a sexy purring sound with her voice and Piper melted, her legs going weak she sat on the top step and leaned against the wood. She asked Alex what she ate for dinner. It was meatloaf, so she knew all Alex ate was fruit or a veggie. Piper told her about her mom's soup and bread. Alex made all the appropriate wishful sounds.

"So no meatloaf at the wedding?" Piper teased

Alex snorted, " Well maybe some of the music of Meatloaf...remind me to tell you what my cousins and I used to do to entertain and family gatherings….I can tell you now you're going to be family officially." Piper begged her to write it in a letter.

"You owe me letters, kid. I wrote you daily remember?" Piper did and she promised to write her one tonight to mail off. All too soon their time was up and she promised to call Piper again in a few days. She got to say that she loved her before they hung up and that seemed to calm her. Piper sat there for a few minutes then turned to go back inside.

****** One more maybe- I will start a season six one in July after I am done traveling for the Summer. Please Review! Peace Fae****