Italians Do It Better
-I feel your fingers/ Cold on my shoulder
Your chilling touch/ As it runs down my spine
Watching your eyes as they invade my soul
Forbidden pleasures/ I'm afraid to make mine...
At the touch of your hand/ At the sound of your voice
At the moment your eyes meet mine
I am out of my mind/ I am out of control
Full of feelings I can't define.
It's a sin with no name/ Like a hand in a flame
And my sense proclaim/ It's a dangerous game!
A darker dream/ That has no ending
Something unreal/ That you want to be true.
A dance of death/ Out of a mystery tale
The frightened princess/ Doesn't know what to do!
Does she just run away?/ Does she risk it and stay?/ Either way there's no way to win!
All I know is I'm lost/ And I'm counting the cost/ My emotions are in a spin.
And though no one's to blame,/ It's a crime and a shame
But it's true all the same/ It's a dangerous game!
No one speaks/ Not one word/ All the words are in our eyes.
Silence speaks/ Loud and clear/ All the words we/ Want to hear.
At the touch of your hand/ At the sound of your voice
At the moment your eyes meet mine
I am out of my mind/ I am out of control
Fighting feelings I can't define.
It's a sin with no name/ Like a hand in the flame
Fire, fury and shame!/ And the angels proclaim...
It's a dangerous game!
- "It's A Dangerous Game" from JEKYLL & HYDE
How strongly are you opposed to grand theft auto?
Alice's voice rang in my mind as I drove my 'borrowed' black Porsche 911 Turbo down the winding freeway, through mountains and forests I'd once called home.
The sun was just beginning to set as I weaved between other cars, the breakneck driving I'd once hated, seemed so natural and comfortable now.
Who'd have thought it? Bella the speed-neurotic turned speed freak?
As my old town came into view, the twilight painting the closely grouped houses a dull sienna as it disappeared behind the mountains, my grip tightened on the steering wheel, making the leather of my gloves and the wheel creak.
What was I doing? What game was I playing?
A dangerous one.
I was filled with a desire to see my father again, even if it meant I couldn't let him see me so changed, but I would be leaving a trail for Aro to follow. Straight to my father.
Finally the forests of Northern Washington began to close in around us, and I pulled in, ditching my car. I preferred to run. I flipped my hood up, shielding my skin from the last of the early evening light.
As I ran, I thought. I was on Quileute territory, and I was a vampire. If they caught me I was fair game. I had to be quick, one last look at my father and then run somewhere else, somewhere I could think in peace, away from Aro. My thoughts turned to the Cullens; where they still here? Would Alice see me now my twins were born and I was a vampire? How did I feel about that?
I was filled with yearning to see the family I'd once dreamed of joining and yet I didn't want to. I couldn't face Edward.
A part of me still loved him, I wasn't going to deny it. I would always love him, but I had lived without him now, and I knew it was possible. Aro had done what Jake could not; he'd outshone a solar eclipse.
My mind drifted to my werewolf best friend. We were enemies now, would he hate me for what I had become? Was he even here?
My old house appeared in the distance, and I flitted into the shadows of a tree that sat beside it. The lights were off, the house empty, Charlie's police cruiser missing from the drive. I saw with a pang that my old Chevy still sat in the drive, even more rusty than I remembered.
My bedroom window was open; it had been from there that I had woken up on the first morning after I had found out Edward was a vampire. I had looked out and seen him waiting with his Volvo in the driveway for me.
So much had changed.
Without thinking, I jumped and grabbed the ledge, swinging myself inside. Once there, I looked around, memories and grief washing over me. My bedroom door was locked, white sheets laid over the furniture. Through the gauzy material I could see the layers of dust over the books and laptop, my bedroom lamp. My pictures of my old school friends were still there, Mike smiling at me, standing beside Eric and Angela and Jessica.
My fingers drifted over a book; Quileute legends. The book that had led me to the truth about Edward, and started this whole crazy journey into the supernatural. A ring I had worn the first day I'd met him, when he had glowered at me murderously, and I wondered what his problem had been, sat on my dresser.
A jacket hung around my work chair, the same one I had worn for my first trip to Italy. My fingers glided over the soft brown material, and the dirty white fleece lining of the hood. The trip that had changed my life.
The sound of a car engine stopping outside, and the sound of a human heartbeat had me jerking out of my memories. I moved to the curtain, peering through them.
Dad.
Something was wrong. He stumbled out of his car, and he couldn't walk in a straight line. In a flash I was out of my old bedroom and down on the pavement. I watched in slow motion as he toppled forward, and I caught him instinctively.
"I've got you, Dad," I murmured, holding him against me, inhaling warily. My throat burned, but I ignored it, before the smell got to me. He was drunk.
I stared at my comatose father. Charlie never got drunk, he wasn't a big drinker. So what the hell?
"Bells?" he muttered weakly, as I held him in my arms.
"I'm here, Dad," I replied, glad my hood threw my face into shadow so he couldn't see my red eyes. My voice was off slightly, but I don't think he noticed.
"You were always such a good girl. Takin' care of me, of Renee," he slurred, slumping in my hold. "You cold, Bells."
"Yeah, I know. C'mon, let's get you inside," I swung him into my arms, his weight ridiculously light. I noticed with a pang the bottle of Jack Daniels in the glove compartment of the police cruiser.
We were halfway up the stairs when he said something that almost made me freeze.
"Why'd you jump off the cliff, Bella? Why did you commit suicide?" he asked me, his eyes heavy. He was heavily inebriated. Wait, he thought I committed suicide?
And then I remembered. The day I had discovered I was pregnant I had gone to the La Push cliff top where I had jumped once before, on an adrenaline rush. I had cut my hand, I recalled, and my engagement ring had dropped off my finger. The Volturi had found me there, and I'd disappeared without a trace for humans to follow. But surely the Cullens would have known? The Quileute werewolves?
I was dead. My human life had ended months ago, without my being aware of it. And now Dad was falling apart because of my selfishness.
I laid my father down on his bed, leaning over him. He was semi-conscious, and falling fast, until I woke him up again.
"Dad!"
"My Bells. Always knew you'd become an angel," he said. Great, he thought I was an angel. I wanted to cry.
"Dad, you have to listen to me. Listen to me!" I shook him gently, when I noticed his greying hair and the bags under his eyes. My father had grown old. Pain slashed through me again. "Dad, you have got to pull it together. You can't live the rest of your life like this,"
"You're all I had, kiddo," he murmured, falling asleep.
"Dad, for me. Stop drinking, and go back to work, and meet some gorgeous woman who can make you happy. Make me proud," I whispered in his ear. He nodded sleepily, before he rolled over and snores began to shake the house. I sighed and pulled the covers over him, removing his shoes. I could only hope something in his subconscious would remember what I'd told him, even if he only thought it a dream.
"Goodbye, Dad," I murmured, moving to the open window. I couldn't stay here.
Suddenly I rushed back to his side and planted a kiss on his forehead, trying not to let sobs shake my body. "I love you. Have a great life, for me, Dad,"
Those last words were a whisper against his ear, before I was out the window, a mere shadow in the night. My children would never know their grandfather. Charlie would never know his namesake, and my father would never know his grandson was named after him.
I cried silently, as I ran through the trees.
I found my feet taking me towards the La Push reservation. I knew it was stupid, that the wolves would kill me if they found me but it was an urge I couldn't deny.
The waves crashed on the beach, grey storm clouds racing in from the sea. I remembered the whirl and the rush of the currents as they'd battered my body, a year and three months ago. With that one little jump my life had changed forever.
I paced to one of the broken logs, one on which I'd sat and talked for hours on end to Jake, before the supernatural had come between us. Now we were natural enemies. My best friend the werewolf, and me the vampire.
I heard the ultra-fast heartbeat before I felt the heat, and smelt the wet-dog smell. Growling reached my ears, as I slowly turned.
I knew that russet wolf.
"Jake…." I sighed. The monstrous wolf stopped growling, looking at me oddly, curiously. I took my hands out of my pockets, and dropped my hood, just as the light of the moon fell on my face. I heard his intake of breath, as his jaw dropped, but I understood the gesture.
Bella!
I saw him begin to tremble, and I turned my back so he could phase back and change. His scent rose on the wind, yet it was strangely unappetising. I felt no thirst.
"Bella…?" Jake's warm, husky voice, tinged with wonder and disbelief, had me turning.
"Hey, Jake," I said weakly. His eyes sparkled with moisture, before they hardened, as did the mask of his face.
"So the bloodsuckers changed you after all. What'd you do, hide out in the forest whilst they did that sham of a funeral?" he asked bitterly. I shook my head.
"No, Jake. The Cullens didn't turn me," I whispered, pain in my voice. Even I could hear it.
His cold mask cracked slightly.
"They…didn't? Then how?" he gestured weakly. I smiled wryly, keeping my distance. I knew wolves hated the smell of vampires almost as much as vampires hated theirs.
"The freaky red eyes and the cold skin?" I clarified. He nodded.
"You remember the Volturi?"
"Hard to forget," he muttered bitterly. I flinched at the memories.
"Well, they kinda did this to me. It's a long story," I sighed. Jake looked ready to burst.
"I've got all night. You gave me a scare when I smelt vampire on the res. I'd thought the Cullens had come back, or another leech-er sorry. No offence," he grinned sheepishly.
"None taken." I shrugged. "Wait, what d'you mean, 'the Cullens had come back'? When did they leave?" I asked, both dreading and wanting the answer. Jake shrugged.
"Bout a month ago, maybe more. Don't know where they went," he said. Suddenly he launched himself at me and I flinched expecting sharp claws to impact around me. Instead I only felt hot arms cradle me, as he buried his face in my hair.
"Bells, I thought you were dead," he murmured.
"I kinda am, Jake. But it's good to see you too," I hugged him back. He winced.
"Ow. When did you get so strong?" he asked, as I released him, mortified.
"Sorry!"
"No sweat. You wouldn't need me to protect you from Paul anymore, that's for sure," Jake joked, and I was glad to see him back to his old self. I moved back slightly.
"I know you don't like the smell," I muttered in explanation at his hurt expression. He shrugged.
"C'mon then. You gonna tell me the great epic story of where you've been for the past few months or not?" he asked me, leading the way to the logs. I nodded, glad to finally tell my story to someone.
So I told Jake everything. That was the great thing about Jake; I could tell him anything, and he wouldn't judge me. I told him about my sacrifice in Volterra the first time, and then my second encounter with Aro. I told him about my pregnancy and how my confrontation with Edward had gone. I told him that Aro had found me and brought me back to Volterra.
I told him the whole story.
"Wow!" he muttered, whistling through his teeth.
"So you not going to give me hell over sleeping with another vampire, getting knocked up and becoming a vampire myself?" I asked, when the expected tirade didn't come. Jake sent me a sidelong look.
"Nope. You've always loved things you shouldn't, Bells. I'm not massively surprised, but what a scumbag, this Aro. And now you've run away from him?" he asked again. I began to nod, then stopped.
"Not exactly. I just need time away from him, to think straight,"
"You should get marriage counselling," he quipped, and I rolled my eyes. His gaze fell on them.
"Your eyes aren't gold," he said bluntly, and I flinched.
"No, but Jake I haven't killed any humans, I swear to you. I steal blood from blood banks and hospitals," I explained hurriedly. "One of my gifts is the kind of super-control over my thirst."
"That's useful. So no scary newborn year, huh?"
"Nope. That's part of the reason why I ran from Aro. He wouldn't understand why I couldn't drink from a human. I guess he's been doing it so long, and he's so old, he's forgotten what it is to have been human," I sighed, looking up at the stars. The clouds had disappeared, and they were out in full force. They were beautiful.
"How old?" Jake asked me.
"Two thousand, seven hundred and nine years," I replied. I heard Jake's whistle again.
"How is everybody?" I suddenly asked. "Quil? Embry? Sam? Paul? Emily? Billy? The Clearwaters?"
"They're all cool. Dad is around yours a lot, trying to help Charlie out-"
"I saw him." I sighed.
"He's in pretty bad shape." Jake nodded.
"He thought I was an angel, he was so drunk. When did that start?" I asked, turning my head to look at him.
"At the funeral. I guess Charlie couldn't cope with the grief. Dad tried to snap him out of it," Jake told me. "Emily and Sam have gotten married, and she's pregnant. The pack is cool, but it's a good thing I'm the only one who regularly runs patrol. The others might have taken you down, no matter who you are,"
"Thanks for the warning. I'll keep away in future," I promised. Jake's face fell.
"Can't you stay near? I would like to see you, vamp or not," he pleaded. I shook my head, putting a hand on his muscled bicep.
"It's been great seeing you, Jake, but Aro knows I have a past here. This will be the first place he'll look, when he comes after me." I said, fingering my Volturi crest.
"Guess so," he blew his cheeks out, sighing heavily. Suddenly he stiffened.
"What is it?" I asked, as he began to tremble. We stood as one, and I lowered into a hunting crouch, moving away from Jake as the trembling which preceded phasing got worse.
"Vampire," he ground out between his teeth. "Run, now!"
"I'm afraid it's too late for that," a cool, seductive voice I knew well said from the shadows of the trees. With dread and desire in my heart I turned to see Aro, silhouetted against the dim light of the moon.
"Aro."
"You certainly know how to pick'em, Bells" Jake said snarkily. I knew what he meant. Aro looked like he belonged on the cover of GQ, in his trademark black suit and dark overcoat, not standing on a dark beach at midnight.
"Jake, go back inside. I can handle this one myself," I said, a strange buzzing sensation in my hands. I didn't want two men I loved fighting each other.
"Bells, I'm not leaving you on your own," Jake stepped up beside me. That buzzing sensation grew worse.
"Jake stop being so stubborn!" I muttered through my teeth, not taking my eyes off of Aro. God, just looking at him made me ache. His cruelly sensual beauty was only magnified under moonlight.
"Hello, Bells! You're driftin'" Jake snapped his fingers in front my eyes.
"Sorry!"
Jake rolled his eyes. Aro, who'd been watching us through narrowed eyes, shook his head.
"So this is the famous Jacob Black."
"How do you know his name?" I snapped angrily. Damn, I'd hoped to keep the wolves out of this.
"Edward was a very jealous man," Aro replied smoothly. I rolled my eyes. "I can't believe you named our son after a dog."
"What?" Jake exploded.
"Charlie's middle name, or one of anyway, is Jacob. Hope you don't mind," I shrugged, really hoping he wouldn't mind.
"Nah, not really," he shrugged after a moment.
"Look at you two arguing like an old married couple," Aro sighed, stepping closer. I moved in front of Jake, feeling his trembling worsen.
"Aro, keep back. Jake go home," I warned both of them. I moved between them, my hands outstretched towards them both.
"Bells, I can't let some leech trespass onto our lands," Jake gasped.
"What do you think I am? Aro, keep back! You have no idea what you're dealing with!" I yelled at him, snarling, my head turning from Jake to Aro and back again.
"Bella, I think I can handle it. We have some things to discuss, do we not?" he said calmly, holding out one gloved hand to me.
"I am not going anywhere with you," I backed away slightly.
Aro sighed. "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't drag you kicking and screaming back to Volterra?"
"Because I'm stronger than you," I held up my fingers, taking them down one by one. "I'm faster than you. And I will kick your vampire ass if you try,"
"Kick my vampire ass? What in heaven or earth does that mean?" Aro raised an eyebrow, and I sighed exasperatedly.
"Told you he was old," I muttered in an aside to Jake.
"Now who's arguing like an old married couple! Maybe you should think about marriage therapy," Jake muttered. I rolled my eyes.
"Don't give him ideas-Jake!" I screamed, as he phased, his claws just missing my face.
"Bella, come with me now!" Aro almost reached out to me, but Jake growled and tried to leap forward.
"NO!" I cried, throwing my hands out, blinking. When my eyes opened, I blinked again. From my hands hung a shimmering, mirror-like shield that had spread out from my palms, separating me and Aro, and me and Jacob.
"What the hell?" I muttered.
"Well, I guess you have discovered one power, Bella," Aro observed, his eyes wide. Jake growled, confusion in his basketball-sized eyes.
"Great," I rolled my eyes. "How did you find me?"
"Bella, it's not hard. Where is the one place left on Earth you have any ties to your mortal life?" Aro asked me, exasperation on his own face.
"Already figured that. What do you want?" I asked, dreading the answer.
"You. Or more importantly I need to talk to you," he said. Jake growled.
"Easy, Jake," I murmured, my shield still hanging around them both spasmodically.
"Alright, I'll offer you a deal. If I come with you, just to talk, then you forget you ever saw Jake, and he can go home. Agreed?" I stared Aro down.
"A fair compromise," he inclined his head.
"Not your best feature," I breathed. He continued without noticing my barb.
"If the dog is agreeable?"
"Tip: stop calling him a dog," I turned my back on Aro, addressing Jake. "Jake, when I let this shield down, I want you to go home. Go home to Billy and stay there."
He growled, shaking his great head.
"No, Jake. I can handle Aro, he's no threat. I'll get him off Quileute lands," I promised him. Jake fixed me with a black glare, one I held effortlessly as the minutes ticked by. "Jake, please?"
Finally the wolf bowed his head, and I sighed in relief. I turned back to Aro. "You keep your end of the bargain,"
"As long as you keep yours," he said suavely. I glared at him.
"Ok, there's just one problem. I have no idea how to shut this thing off," I muttered.
"Close your eyes, Bella-" Aro began.
"Thanks for that, Yoda!" I snarled. He glared at me, and I shivered under the intensity in his eyes.
"Just do it Bella," he sighed through gritted teeth. I took hold of my temper and did so. "Now, search within your mind for the trigger. Focus on it and release the power,"
Strange to tell, I could feel the trigger in my mind. It had been instinctive, driven by a need to stop two men I loved from tearing each other to pieces. As I searched for it, I felt another layer. My mental shield. It felt like a living elastic layer over my mind and I pondered at this new development. This could be interesting; it felt movable. Maybe I could protect others with it too. I felt my shield drop, as I breathed a sigh of relief. I felt slightly drained by the experience.
"Come, Bella," Aro held out his hand to me commandingly, but I ignored it, turning to the wolf behind me. "Careful, Bella!"
"He won't harm me," I murmured, kneeling down beside the giant wolf. I stroked his fur, and hugged him, burrowing into his heat. "Love you, Jake. Have a great life."
He gave a mournful howl, a basketball sized tear falling down his giant cheekbone. Slowly, he trudged back into the forest, before breaking into a trot and then a gallop, never looking back. "Goodbye, my friend."
I felt Aro draw close, his scent and his strength reaching for me, making me want to just-
No! This was exactly why I'd left Volterra. So I could think free of him, for a little while. So I could reassure myself that I was still me, still Bella.
I ran.
- Aro chased me through the forest, as I raced ahead, leading him from Quileute lands, far from Forks, up into the mountains. I felt a hand grab my arm and swing me around. My back collided with a tree, a branch cracking overhead, raining pine needles down us. I found myself nose to nose with Aro, our breathing ragged, our eyes fixed on one another.
Anger and desire burned in his eyes, the reciprocal emotions rising in me.
"You can't run from me, Bella!" he snarled, as I opened my mouth to reply.
He kissed me, hard and fast, taking possession of my mouth, and my senses.
He didn't play fair.