Shera's Diary
Chapter 21
Departure
By Kristen Gupton-Williams
Dear Diary,
Let's see…
I roused Cid from his sleep in the chair after my last entry and got him to his bed. He asked if I would stay with him again, and I naturally did. Nothing happened, though.
We just slept.
This morning, I got up and prepared his breakfast. He appeared at the kitchen table right on cue at seven. We ate, and nothing much was said between us. It seems like he's still muddling through his confession from yesterday.
And, that's all right with me.
I know, now, that he does really care and that's honestly enough for me.
Do I wish that… Oh Lord, I can't even write it but yes, I wish that things between us could go to… another level before he has to leave again today. I know that if nothing else, though, Captain Cid Highwind takes his time to get around to things and he'll have to save the world before he and I ever... if we ever…
I'm so embarrassed, I'm making myself blush just thinking about it.
It's time to make lunch.
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Dear Diary,
Time is too short sometimes. It drags when you don't want it to, and when you wish things would last just a little bit longer…
It just falls through your fingers like water.
He left again.
I got his lunch served up and he ate well, but when he was finished, he looked over at me. "Shera…"
"Yes?" I said back, already knowing what he was about to say to me.
"I gotta get goin'." His voice was flat in that moment, lifeless.
Nodding, I got up and went around the table. "Cid… I know you can't promise me anything, but…"
He smiled as my words trailed off and he got up as well, pulling me in for an embrace. "I'm gonna make it through this. That's the only way I get to be with ya, right?"
I nodded again, this time, with my head against his chest.
"Well then, I'll do it. Hell, I've beaten the odds this far," he said, almost with a laugh.
"Just… be careful," I squeaked out.
Cid held me for several more minutes, and I could hear his heart racing within the whole while. Eventually, he stepped back from me, grabbed his coat from the back of his chair and took my hand. He led me to the front yard and I stood idly by as he got his bird saddled up.
When that was done, he waved me over and I went to his side. He tossed the cigarette he'd been working on to the ground and took me into his arms again. I closed my eyes and held on for all I was worth, dreading that it might be the last time I ever touched him.
Still keeping me close, he spoke quietly. "Now, y'all are gonna stay in that house until I get back, right? God knows what sorta shit's gonna fall from the sky in the next few days."
"Okay," I managed.
He looked down at me and leaned closer, until our lips met in what was just our second kiss. This time, it seemed to last just a little longer than before, and I am in no way complaining.
When he finally stepped back, he offered me a smile and a nod before turning and getting on that chocobo he'd ridden home.
I clasped my hands together before my chest, praying silently that he would be all right as he rode away. There were tears upon my cheeks, and I was shaking, not only in fear, but as a result of that kiss, too.
He stopped the bird just a short distance away and turned back to look at me. "Shera?"
I gazed at him, trying to hide my crying. "Yes?"
"I love ya," he said, barely audible.
I broke into a wide smile at that. "I love you, too, Cid."
Once more, he gave that curt nod of his. "Oh, and one other thing…"
"Yes?"
That trademark smirk of his came to his lips and I think he may have blushed slightly. "Remember when I told y'all I was gonna teach ya to fly?"
I nodded.
"I meant it…" He turned back around in the saddle and let the bird take a few more steps before stopping again. This time, he didn't turn to face me, but he spoke one last time. "When I get home, I'm gonna make ya an honest woman and we'll get to makin' them kids we were talkin' about a while ago."
I about fell over at that and then he got his bird to trot off down the road.
Make me an honest woman?
What in the hell does that mean?
I guess I'll have to wait until he comes back home again.
Please, God, let him be safe…