hello guys! (i know this is a lot of text, but if you'd read it all, it would mean a lot to me!)
i'm back again with some unpleasant news :( i've actually been procrastinating a bit with this story and i want to apologize since a lot of you might still be following this and are waiting for new chapters!
i'm trying to get back to the story but it hasn't been happening lately due to some personal issues i had/have to deal with. so my inspiration has been near close to zero. BUT! i've been getting a lot of nice reviews on my story and i just never like to quit something once i've started it, so i will not discontinue this story.
i'm just putting it off for a bit longer.
as for my personal issues, i suppose i owe all of you faithful readers at least some type of explanation. so let's start at the beginning;
i started writing fan fiction when i was 14? yeah i think i was that young, and i just used to read them and all but then i got inspired to write actual fanfics myself. i used to keep a journal, in which i wrote my poetry and what not. but fan fiction was a whole new world to me and after much internal debating i finally started my first story ever: First or Last Kiss?
i was so proud of my first few chapters and i had no idea it would become this big (at least it's big to me bc more than 22k people have actually read this crap!)
anyways, i was so focussed on constantly writing and publishing that i totally lost track of the plot i had in mind, even now, i can't remember what my original plan for this story was. but that's totally fine because i'm just writing whatever i feel like and going wherever the story is taking me, which suits my style better, i think.
however, there's a slight problem to this. since i write whatever comes to mind and make up the story as i go, it's really hard for me to get inspired/motivated again once i'm stuck. this has happened on several occasions, which is why there's no structure in my updates whatsoever, and i'm incredibly grateful for all the love i still manage to receive despite the fact that you all probably wait for ages until i upload!
OKAY, to the point: writing has been my way of getting my emotions out and converting these emotions into words is what i'm good at. it has always been some sort of escape, and not just for me, there's a lot of people that probably feel the same way. i feel relieved when i am able to write, but frustrated when i want to write and find my mind blank.
i did not have the best childhood experience and my mental health has seen better days, but writing has always been able to calm me down. and being able to share what i do? that's amazing. i love writing for you guys and i love getting so much in return!
it's just that lately things have been getting worse (things started going down hill since January 2016) i have been suffering from depression since i was 12 and when i entered my second-last year i was on the verge of killing myself. i probably wouldn't be sitting here right now, writing this if it hadn't been for my friends. i owe them so much.
anyway, as you might understand, i'm having a little bit of trouble coping with everything right now and it's just so overwhelming that i'm now in my final year and that i survived (!) last year and that i'm still here, i'm alive, i'm alive, i'm alive.
.
well then, thank you all for reading! and i hope to see you in another update! i promise i will do my best to write the last couple of chapters as soon as i can.
i just want to tell you that i am so, so, SO immensely thankful for all the love my story received in the past and is still receiving! you guys have no idea how much that means to me! i love reading your reviews as well, they are all that keeps me going. you all are my motivation to keep writing!
stay strong loves,
iris
P.S.
my PM box is always open and you can talk to me anytime you want!