Raxmon remained with Narssia for a moment longer to determine if he could leave her alone or not. He was worried about her and yet it would do him no good to irritate her by being around all the time.

If you wish to leave then you may, I will not stop you, Narssia muttered as she stared down at the dirt floor of the tent shared that she shared with Eragon and Saphira due to Raxmon's wishes.

Sighing, Raxmon hesitated for a moment longer and then turned and left. He needed to speak with Saphira over something that concerned both him and Narssia but he could not speak about while the black dragoness was among them. Finally finding her laying out among stalks of grass and soaking up the sun's rays, Raxmon growled softly before walking over to her.

Saphira, might I speak with you for a moment?

The blue dragoness in questioned lifted her head and growled softly in pleasure upon seeing Raxmon. His scales cast a gentle light around him and yet he had been distracted recently with something that he had yet to tell her. Perhaps he now wished to speak about it?

I believe I have the time to speak. Why little one? What thoughts plague your mind?

Taking a deep breath as he stopped before her, Raxmon hesitated before he spoke.

Narssia is here among us . . . yet with no memory of events before a week ago. What I did to her, what she suffered by way of me, she now bears the deepest scars from.

What do you mean Raxmon? What do you talk of when you speak of what she suffered by you?

Saphira's tone was filled with worry as she gazed upon Raxmon, something he had not heard very much from her.

I violently attacked her in a moment of emotional breakdown and caused her to develop amnesia. She has hurt me far greater then what I have done to her though, Raxmon growled as he struggled to keep his voice even.

Why would you do that? How did you manage to hurt her as last I heard she was working with the Empire? Saphira questioned.

Back of her head with my tail. I lost control over myself as anger replaced my feelings for her. I n-never meant for it to happen, Raxmon muttered in response as he tore his gaze from Saphira but not before she could see that his eyes were moist.

Lifting his tail, Raxmon ran his clawed right forepaw under it, breaking through the tough exterior of his scaled hide, and allowed a few drops of blood to ooze gently onto his claws before he allowed his tail to fall back to the ground. Glancing down at his blood-tinted claws as he lifted his hand back up to gaze upon it, Raxmon trembled as he remembered the attack. He had never been so uncontrolled, never been so emotionally driven.

You see that which I am? He asked as he showed Saphira his blood-stained claws. I am a monster! Narssia did not deserve me as her love nor do I deserve her for what I have done to her.

Raxmon paused for a moment before resuming speaking, although his voice was much lower as he allowed his clawed forepaw to fall back onto the dirt and grass below him.

I have been horrible towards Narssia since she left us in the desert. Why? I can only guess that the past seeks to connect with the present and repair the time stream by punishing those that cross through it. I do not deserve to have Narssia if the Varden win the war. I fear if she knew the truth then she would not even be here or even anywhere close to me, Raxmon confessed.

I know not what to say Raxmon. Your words come from your heart and it is to be well thought of, Saphira snorted as she was beginning to understand why Raxmon had done that which he said he had to Narssia.

I want Narssia to have a good life now after what her childhood was like. I cannot even begin to imagine what she had to live through at the mercy of Nahido, her insane father that lost his family when he was young, Raxmon sighed as he lowered his head.

It was still a difficult subject for him to speak of, Raxmon thought as he found his thoughts returning to that of his parents. His mother had been pregnant when she was murdered by Narssia and he had only survived to his father's sacrifice. Narssia had been different then, she killed only because that was the only thing she knew to do, and yet now her amnesia had nearly stripped her back to her most earliest thoughts. Raxmon swallowed and blinked as he forced himself to abandon thinking of his dead parents. It was still an emotional topic for him, considering it had only been three months since their death.

You seem saddened Raxmon. Why? Saphira inquired.

My parents were murdered three months ago on this very day by Narssia. My mother was pregnant when she was killed and I only survived due to my father's sacrifice, Raxmon confessed as he blinked again as tears had begun to collect in the corners of his eyes.

I am sorry to hear this. Have you brought it up with Narssia? Saphira asked.

I would dare not bring it up around her given she could remember it at any moment, Raxmon responded with a faint growl. Narssia is far too fragile now to know the truth.

What happens when she gets her memory back and blames you for not telling her?

I will get to that when it comes. I thank you for speaking with me Saphira but I must leave. I fear that I will become emotional if I stay any longer, Raxmon answered as he sighed and turned to walk away.

If you ever need someone to talk to you can come to me. I will not mind speaking with you over things that you believe that Narssia is too fragile to know about. I want you to be able to come to me with anything and I hope you know that by now, Saphira snorted.

Your words mean much to me Saphira so thank you. I take my leave, Raxmon growled as he walked off, now set on what to tell Narssia and what to not tell her.

- - -

Narssia had been fighting back any personal feelings of unease when Raxmon returned to the tent. His gaze had returned to the same coldness that he had when he had attacked her only two weeks prior. Raxmon growled softly and licked Narssia on the cheek as he stopped before her and saw that she was distracted.

What is on your mind? He asked.

I am worried for us. What will become of our relationship if I get attacked and lose our future children . . . ?

Raxmon roared in response to her statement. She would not lose their children, that he would make sure of.

Do not speak in such a manner! Lowering his voice, Raxmon continued after a moment. I will not let anything get to you, I promis-

Yet you say that when this place has those that would hurt me because of who I worked with before my memory was taken from me. How can you consider the Varden as protection for me? How Raxmon? Narssia snapped back as she took a step back and rubbed up against the brown cloth that was the tent with her tail. I would sooner return to Uru'baen and take my chances with Shruikan then stay here with you!

Then why do you still linger here? Go then if that is what you want! You think that you will be better off with Shruikan but you are wrong, Raxmon growled.

Narssia stood where she was, unsure of her next move. She had never seen Raxmon display such anger towards her since they had met after he saved her from the forest fire that he spawned.

I am sorry for what I have said. I am consumed by emotional grief today and I spoke before I thought about it, Raxmon confessed. My parents were killed three months ago on this very day and my mother was pregnant when she died.

Narssia was sure that Raxmon's eyes were moist as he turned his view away from her as he focused his gaze on the brown cloth of the tent. His parents had died? Could she have . . . ? No, it did not seem possible.

Is what you say the truth? Narssia inquired as she spoke through the silence that had enfolded the two since Raxmon spoke of his parents' death.

I have spoken the truth but I cannot bring myself to say who it was that killed them, Raxmon answered as he was now breathing heavily as he sought to control his emotions.

His eyes had remained moist and yet Raxmon could not bring himself to tell Narssia that it was her that had killed his parents. He could not tell her of the anger he felt every day because of what she had done nor could he speak to her of his heartache over the fact that he had made her forget what she had done to him by killing the only family he had known. It was a delicate balance of what he should reveal to her, that much Raxmon could decide for himself. He would not tell her that she had killed his parents, he decided as he saw that she was deeply affected by what he had said.

What were their names? She asked.

Taurus and Setara, Raxmon muttered softly.

The color of their scales?

My father was yellow and my mother . . .

Raxmon stopped himself as he found himself choking up over speaking about his mother. He had shared a strong bond with her and for him to be speaking about her to the one that killed her was difficult upon any day but for it to be the day that she had died was impossible to understand the difficulty that Raxmon now faced.

Setara was a green dragon, he forced himself to utter as emotion was clearly present in his voice as he spoke.

Narssia sighed and closed her eyes as Raxmon turned his gaze from her again. Only when Raxmon did turn his gaze back to her did he realize that she was trying to force her mind to recall anything about the two dragons. When Narssia opened her eyes again, Raxmon growled softly as he figured out that she had remembered nothing about them. Only time would bring about the return of her memory it seemed.

I will gladly offer myself to the Empire's army when we meet them at Dras-Leona. I cannot allow you to put yourself in danger over what I have done by escaping from them, Narssia offered.

Thank you for the offer Narssia but I must declin-

You will accept my offer Raxmon and besides we now share something between us, something that makes us one. Our children are the invisible thread that keeps us bonded as one. They were made from our love for each other and it is time I proved that I do love you, Narssia interrupted as a soft growl rippled from her jaws.

Raxmon almost allowed himself to tell her the truth, almost allowed himself to break down and show her the emotional turmoil that raged within his heart but he controlled himself. He would not burden her with the fact that she had killed his parents and his unborn siblings. No dragon should have to know that if they had forgotten their past as she had.

Very well. I accept your offer but keep me informed on what is going on. I want to know that you are safe, Raxmon sighed.

You do not want me to leave? Is that what I am hearing from you? Narssia asked.

Raxmon chuckled and licked her softly on the cheek once again.

You do indeed hear that from me, Raxmon growled, but yet I want you to have a chance to recover who you are without worry or fear.

Fear? What do I have to be afraid of? Narssia inquired. I know now why you attacked me as you had and yet there is still something that I could be afraid of within my memories that have not returned to me, is that what you are saying?

I only want you to be happy Narssia, Raxmon sighed. Could you try something for me?

What do you wish for me to do? Narssia asked as she laid down, having calmed since their heated talk earlier on.

I thought that we could try something and see if it sparks your memory any. Close your eyes and tell me the first thing that you see, Raxmon instructed.

I suppose I can do that, Narssia admitted as she forced herself to relax and close her eyes.

Raxmon waited patiently as he observed her while Narssia did what he had asked. It was difficult for him to reduce himself to this, reduce himself to having to ask Narssia to endure her own past once again while he could only watch, Raxmon thought as the seconds passed without any response from Narssia. Finally Narssia's eyelids twitched, a clear sign that she was indeed forcing herself to dig through her memories.

I see the outline of a dark shadow. Its form resembles our own and yet its eyes, they glisten with such hardness and anger. I know not who this dragon is but . . .

Raxmon listened silently. Her description made it seem most likely that it was her father that she was remembering as he had been a black dragon. Of course what he had done to both her and Vevra was unforgivable in that he had corrupted her young mind and made her who she was.

Narssia snarled briefly and Raxmon tore himself from his thoughts. She grimaced in pain and turned her head away from him. Raxmon uttered a soft growl as he could only watch as interfering might cause more damage to her stressed mind and make things even worse.

Narssia? Raxmon growled as he spoke up after several minutes had past since she last made a sound.

Narssia twitched once again and slowly opened her eyes, although she did not turn her head back to face Raxmon right away. Her eyes, now completely white, finally flickered to gaze upon him and Raxmon could not help but snarl softly. He had seen her do this behavior but only once and it had not lasted long. Why she went through this he had no idea but it did not seem to hurt her in any way.

Narssia closed her eyes again and sighed as she opened them to reveal her normal yellow irises. She growled as Raxmon blinked in shock over the fact that she had reverted so fast back to normal. It had been strange while she was within her mind, almost as she was two individuals, one that she knew nothing of and the one that she now was. Perhaps she would be able to understand it better after speaking with Raxmon?

What happened? She asked as her gaze remained on Raxmon.

You . . . I am not sure, Raxmon responded as he was as stunned as she was about what had happened.

I can leave if you want to mourn the loss of your family now, Narssia offered as she stood and motioned behind him to indicate that it was now dark as time had slipped away from them.

I would like that.

Raxmon turned his head away from her as Narssia stepped past him and left the tent so that he could grieve as she knew that it was difficult for him to fully handle his emotions during this time, as proof of his angry outburst towards her earlier in the day.

The chilled wind outside the tent lashed against Narssia as she stepped outside, her scales getting coated in a faint layer of fog. The landscape around her was plain, grass and grey rocks along with the other tents of the Varden's members. Fog draped over the ground and as Narssia gazed into it, she thought she could make out the faint image of a white dragoness with a downward facing crescent adorning its brow and having yellow eyes from within the fog.

Who are you? She questioned as the fog neared and the image became more clear.

The drifting mist gave no reply but merely disappeared as quickly as it had risen up and Narssia sighed as she wondered how Raxmon was faring in his grief.

- - - -

Raxmon, with his green eyes closed, painfully allowed himself to recall every moment of his parents' brutal murder. Every image had been etched into his mind since he saw it happen and now it was too painful to be ignored. Their killer was here among the Varden and yet he had made it so she remembered nothing of the killer she once was. Turning his thoughts back to his parents' death, a tear slipped down Raxmon's scaled cheek.

He had been so young when they had been killed and yet here he was with the very dragoness that had murdered then, and had made love to her! Raxmon sat down as he took a deep breath. He was overreacting, she would not know of his parents' death for she could not remember them when he told her their scale colors nor did their names bring up any memories for her.

I cannot bring myself to kill Narssia because I love her, Raxmon thought as he opened his eyes to gaze upon the brown walls of Saphira and Eragon's tent. I cannot force myself to hurt her once again and yet I have a target on me from Shruikan because of what I have done to Narssia already with causing her amnesia.

Raxmon growled and then sighed as he cleared his heart of the guilt that had been building within him for having caused Narssia's amnesia. She was recovering her memory, he no longer had that guilt weighing upon him.