Emily and Richard
"Did you call ahead?" Jess asks Lorelai nervously.
"Why?" Lorelai asks Jess confused.
"There are eight of us," Jess explains. "Last time I came to your parents they barely had enough space for Rory and I."
"It will be fine," Rory reassures Jess. "And if not the kids can sit at the kids table."
"Hey," All the teens protest.
"William, Emily," Luke warns. "On you best behavior tonight."
"Yes dad," They reply glumly.
"Ring the doorbell, grandma," LJ tells Lorelai.
"Why are we even here?" Lorelai asks Luke confused. "It's their engagement, not ours."
"They are family," Luke answers as he reaches out and rings the doorbell. "Plus you want to watch your mother have a heart attack when she remembers who Jess is."
"Oh yeah," Lorelai says remembering. "Come on mom open the door," Lorelai says excitedly just as Emily opens the door.
"Lorelai, please," Emily says hearing Lorelai's last statement. "You would think that you could leave the crude behavior for when you leave."
"Sorry mom," Lorelai says walking into the house. "I just let the excitement wash over me for a minute then, but I'm back… it won't happen again."
"Good," Emily replies as the maid takes everyone's coats. "Make sure that it doesn't."
We make our way into the drinks room. Jess and Holden were still undetected by Emily.
"Hello Lorelai, Luke," Richard says cheerfully as he gets up off the couch. "Rory, William and Emily."
"Hey grandpa," They all respond as they sit down.
"And who's this?" Richard asks Lorelai.
"This is Luke's nephew Jess and his daughter Holden," Lorelai explains and then sits down with Luke.
"You're Dodger Holden aren't you boy?" Richard asks Jess excitedly.
"Yes sir," Jess responds.
"Luke's nephew?" Emily questions. "Jess… Black eye Jess who turns up late and then leaves during the middle of dinner?"
"Yes," Jess responds. "I'm sorry."
"It's a little late for sorry," Emily replies, whilst Jess and Holden take a seat.
"Black eye?" Richard questions. "Where was I for this dinner?"
"Out of town," Emily replies.
"But it sounds familiar," Richard says confused.
"Oh crap," Jess mutters under his breath, it would only take Richard a minute to figure it out.
"I've read it before," Richard muses out loud. "Is it in one of your books Jess?"
"Yes," Jess responds truthfully.
"Her grandmother," Richard says piecing it all together. "That was Emily?"
"Yes," Jess answers.
"What?" Emily asks confused. "What are you talking about?"
"Just one of Jess' books," Lorelai explains. "We're all in it."
"Really?" Emily asks confused.
"So Jess," Richard says changing the subject. "This is your daughter."
"Yes sir," Jess answers.
"Please call me Richard," Richard tells me.
"Ok," Jess replies.
"So does she have the writing talent like you?" Richard asks.
"No," Holden answers. "I'm smart though."
"Well that's always a good quality," Richard replies amused.
"Where's her mother?" Emily asks sharply.
"Mom," Lorelai warns.
"Grandma," Rory warns at the same time as Lorelai.
"What?" Emily responds. "It's a fair question."
"It's alright," Holden answers. "She passed away two years ago."
"I see," Emily replies.
"Dinner is ready," The maid announces and they all make their way into the dining room.
The kids sat on one side, whilst Luke, Lorelai, Rory and Jess sat on the other side. Jess was next to Richard's, which he was thankful for.
"Jess, I hardly recognize you without a black eye," Emily says sharply.
"Yeah," Jess answers.
"How did you get that black eye again?" Emily asks me.
"Weren't you playing football?" Rory asks Jess for confirmation.
"No," Jess replies truthfully.
"What?" Rory asks confused. "I could have sworn that was how it happened."
"That's what I told you," Jess clarifies and her face falls.
"So how did you get the black eye then?" Emily asks.
"I don't…" Jess starts and then glances at Luke who encourages him to go on. "I was beaked by a swan."
"Beaked?" Richard questions.
"A swan?" Rory asks confused. "And you couldn't tell me the truth why?"
"You accused me of fighting Dean," Jess explains to her. "Plus would you really believe me if I said that I was attacked by a swan?"
"Probably not," Rory replies.
"Luke didn't even believe me," Jess tells her.
"I did so," Luke defends. "I was the one in the boat with you, remember?"
"I remember," Jess replies.
"So did you catch the swan?" Lorelai asks Jess amused.
"No," Jess responds.
"Maybe you should try again," Rory says amused.
"Yeah," Lorelai agrees. "The swan's got a good twenty years on you now."
"I think I'll pass," Jess replies.
"Come on," Rory pleads. "Get some revenge."
"So Jess," Emily starts. "Any particular reason why you and your daughter decided to join our family for dinner?"
"Our family mom," Lorelai says. "Jess is Luke's nephew."
"So," Emily replies. "Wait… don't tell me your back with this hooligan Rory."
"Well…" Rory falters.
"Is that an engagement ring?" Richard asks excitedly as he looks at Rory's left hand.
"Well yeah," Rory replies nervously.
"You're getting married?" Emily asks confused. "And to…"
"Jess, mom," Lorelai says. "His name is Jess."
"And yes Grandma," Rory says. "I'm getting married to Jess."
"Why?" Emily asks confused.
"Because I love him," Rory replies.
"Are you sure that he's just not out for our money," Emily says. "Him and his daughter… if it even is his daughter."
That did it, Jess was beyond angry now.
"Dad," Holden warns from across the table. "Calm down."
"But did you not hear…" Jess start but is interrupted by Richard's laughter.
"After. Our. Money." Richard says in between laughs.
"What's so funny?" Emily asks him.
"Jess," Richard says trying to stop laughing. "Jess has more money than us."
"What?" Emily asks confused and slightly outraged. "That can't be possible."
"And I earnt all of my money," Jess says to Emily. "Unlike someone I know."
"Dad," Holden warns again.
"I'm so happy for you Rory," Richard tells her. "Jess is a fine young man."
"You don't even know him," Emily scoffs.
"Umm," Holden says as she gets up from the table and pulls her father up as well. "Would you excuse us for a minute?"
"Dinner is served young lady," Emily says. "Didn't anyone teach you proper dinner etiquette?"
"Umm, no," Holden responds. "Feel free to start without us… we will be back soon."
"What was that for?" Jess asks Holden as she closes the front door behind them.
"Were you or were you not ready to verbally abuse Rory's grandmother?" Holden asks her father.
"She deserved it," Jess huffs as he sits down on the front step.
"So," Holden counters as she sits down next to him. "That is Rory's grandmother. Do you really want her to hate you more than she already does?"
"I don't care," Jess responds. "Let her think what she wants."
"Dad," Holden says and Jess looks at his daughter. "Rory cares."
"So?" Jess replies.
"Can't you suck it up," Holden asks her dad. "For Rory's sake?"
"I…" Jess begins.
"I know it's hard for you," Holden says. "I've read the book… all about how Rory coerced you into that dinner and then didn't stop accusing you of fighting the ex, which I now know is called Dean."
"But I don't know if I can go in there and pretend that everything is alright," Jess tells his daughter truthfully.
"Hmmm, I know," Holden says triumphantly. "Every time Emily says something mean, you just think to yourself- I'm the one going home with Rory."
"Really?" Jess asks skeptically.
"Well it's the truth isn't it," Holden replies. "And nothing Emily says is going to destroy your relationship with Rory is it?"
"No, I guess not," Jess says becoming less angry.
"Just try it," Holden pleads. "And if it doesn't work then feel free to yell as much as you want."
"Okay, deal," Jess says as he gets up off the front step and pulls his daughter with him. "Thanks Ernie."
"That's alright," Holden replies as they make their way back inside. "I like this family and I'm not going to let you stuff this up for me."
"Oh," Jess says sarcastically. "I'm sorry your majesty, please forgive me for thinking that this was about me."
"You're forgiven," Holden replies as she takes her seat next to LJ.
"Sorry Richard, Emily," Jess says as he takes his seat.
"It's alright," Richard replies.
"Sure," Emily scoffs.
"Emily," Jess says politely. "I love those drapes, what kind of fabric is that?"
Everyone at the table, besides Emily, tries to hide their amusement.
"It's cotton," Emily responds.
"Hmmm," Jess says thinking about it. "Why not polyester?"
"Dad," Holden warns. "This is not what I meant."
"Fine," Jess huffs as he brings his hand to his mouth and locks it with an imaginary key.
"Good," Holden says. "Now stay that was for the rest of the night."
"So," Emily says to Lorelai. "William and Emily are still going to public school?"
"Yeah, why?" Lorelai asks confused.
"Don't you think that they deserve a better education?" Emily asks.
"I agree with your mother on this one Lorelai," Richard says.
"Rory can pay for it," Holden supplies.
"What?" Everyone asks confused.
"Well when she marries my dad she'll be able to access his money," Holden explains. "Think of it as a loan," She tells Lorelai. "Friday night dinners at our place."
"What?" Emily asks confused. "Friday night dinner is our thing."
"So?" Holden says innocently. "It is a legally binding contract."
"See that," Lorelai tells her mother. "Legally binding."
"You haven't even said yes yet," Emily tells her daughter.
"But I don't really have a choice," Lorelai replies. "As you said Will and Em need a good education. Isn't that right kids?"
"She's right Grandma," Will says.
"Plus," Em agrees. "We would stay in Stars Hollow on Fridays which means more time to study."
"This is not happening," Emily says and then turns her attention to Jess. "You did this… you corrupted them."
Jess stays silent, a smirk playing on his lips. Emily sighs and then leaves the table.
"Mom," Lorelai calls after her. "It was a joke."
"Was it?" Everyone at the table questions Lorelai.
"I have no idea," Lorelai replies in defeat.