Hello, fic-ers. I bid you good evening. I just wanted to apologize for how long it's taken me to update this. I promise you I really am trying so please have mercy and stick with me. Also, please leave me your wisdom in the reviews; feedback is one thing that really helps me keep it up. You guys are the best.

kurokuun

"Ichigo? Dude, are you even listening?"

Jerking his head back in the direction of his friend, Ichigo's mind cleared enough to focus on reality, if for only a moment. Renji sat across from him at a booth in a dimly lit cafe, staring at him with uncommon concern, his standard jovial attitude forgotten.

"I'm sorry, what were you saying," Ichigo mumbled, taking a drink of tea.

"I was talking about fucking Rukia's brother, but obviously that must be boring for you."

"No it's not, I'm just tired. So you guys did it again?"

"Yeah," Renji sighed, "that's what I said. Last night I got an anonymous text from some third party application and all it gave was an address. I went to the address and it turned out to be this really nice hotel. I walked in and a receptionist walks over to me, hands me a key card, and tells me a room number. I go up to the room and he's just standing there."

"So you just went to an address that was sent to your phone without knowing who you were meeting or anything?" I shouldn't be surprised, but I am," Ichigo said, shaking his head.

"Shut up," Renji said, flashing a wolfish smile although his slightly pink cheeks betrayed him. "Anyway, I walk in and shut the door, and he doesn't even turn around, all he says is, 'after this, you and I are going to have a talk about safety'. And then we went at it until around 3am."

"You sound proud of yourself," Ichigo sneered, sipping his tea again. He, Renji, and Rukia had planned to meet there to hang out earlier in the week. A few hours before they were supposed to be there, Renji insisted Ichigo meet him early, but was unwilling to tell him why. Ichigo rolled his eyes again.

"That's what I get for thinking you might actually want to have an adult conversation with me."

"Harsh, Ichi-"

"Ichigo!"

At the sound of his name Ichigo jumped in his seat, his anxiety that had built up over the past two days rearing its ugly head. His heart beat wildly and his breathing increased before his mind could recognize the voice calling to him as Rukia's. He tried to force a smile as she approached, pretending nothing had happened, but her deep scowl told him she was not oblivious to his reaction. Looking over to Renji, Ichigo saw she was not the only one.

"Hey, Ruk," he said, trying to cover up the pathetic crack in his voice. "Long time no see, huh?"

"What the hell was that, Ichigo," she asked as she slid into the booth next to Renji.

"It's nothing," he said, trying to laugh it away. "I'm just tired and it has me edgy is all."

"Bullshit," Renji growled at him. Ichigo looked over and was surprised at the anger written plainly on his best friends face. "Ichigo, tell me what happened. Now."

Sighing, Ichigo chewed his bottom lip in thought. He didn't want to share the burden he faced with anyone, most of all the people he cared about. After Karin had given him the message left by Ichinose, he had been so terrified that he had a panic attack, his chest constricting so tight he couldn't breathe. Of course, he had suffered this in the privacy of his own room so his family was none the wiser.

But although he didn't want to tell anyone about the message, or seeing Gin, he was at a total loss of what to do. He didn't want to go to the police and have to explain everything, including reliving the incident in the hotel. He most certainly didn't want to tell his father; this whole thing was Ichigo's doing and he didn't want his father to be caught up in the mess. Most of all he refused to tell Grimmjow, if for no other reason than he had gotten a glimpse of what he was capable of.

"Ichigo, we're your friends. We may not be able to help with whatever has happened but we will always listen. We love you like family, and you can trust us," Rukia said softly, easing out of the opposite side of the booth before sitting next to Ichigo, pulling him out of his thought. She placed one warm, gentle hand on his arm and looked at him expectantly.

"Rukia," Ichigo mumbled at his feet, avoiding her gaze. She had always been able to say just the right thing to make him want to pour his heart out to her. Usually it was just frustration about school or family or something trivial, but now that his secret had the potential to bring harm to those around him he felt selfish for wanting to share it. He bit his lip.

"Are you afraid that telling us will cause trouble," Renji said quietly from across the table. Feeling anxiety bloom in his stomach at the eerily correct assumption, Ichigo looked at him quickly and nodded.

"I'm really okay, and I don't want to bother you guys with anything."

"This isn't like you," Renji said, face now set in a deep scowl.

"Pineapple head is right," Rukia chimed in from his left.

"You need to tell us what's going on," Renji continued. "Or you need to tell someone. If you can't talk about it with us, then talk to Grimmjow."

"I can't," Ichigo said quickly, mind flashing back to the sleek, black-handled balisong knife in his lovers hand, aimed for Kariya's temporal lobe. He shivered.

"Why not?"

"I just can't," he hissed, his eyes starting to burn slightly as he tried to reel in his emotions. In his peripheral he saw his friends exchange a look, Renji's scowl growing even deeper.

"Then you need to tell us. Now."

Ichigo felt his chest strain once more, and became fearful that if he didn't do something he would face another panic attack. His breathing increased steadily, eyes unfocused.

It hurts. I can't breathe. God, don't let him do that to me. Please don't let him-

"I like it when you fight."

"Ichigo."

Coming back to the present, he whipped his head up to meet Renji's hard but kind eyes in place of the eyes the color of raw meat.

"I'm scared, Ren," he whispered, voice distant and cracked. His friend stiffened and reached across the table, taking his forearm in a strong grip.

"What are you afraid of," he asked softly, face twisted in a mix of unbridled anger and hurt.

"I told you how that guy, Kariya, beat the shit out of me."

"Yeah," Renji responded, eyes narrowing. Ichigo swallowed over the softball of anxiety in his esophagus.

"He tried to do other things, too," Ichigo cringed, the ghost of sharp pain slithering across his hip where his briefs had been cut off him. "The cut on my hip, he had - he cut off my...he almost did it." Ichigo watched as his friend's face grew pale and was racked with pain, like he himself had been in the room. He cursed under his breath before looking back up.

"Ichi if you're having trouble just tell your dad you want to talk to a counselor or something -"

"No," Ichigo barked with surprising force, enough to make Rukia flinch by his side. He shook his head forcefully. "That's not it. I was okay, at least most of the time. I thought it was over, you know? But then the other night..."

"What? Was it a dream? Did Grimmjow do something? Holy shit, did he force you?" Renji's voice raised as he continued. Shaking his head even more violently, Ichigo responded quickly.

"He would never do that. I'm not afraid when I'm with him. But when we went to Impact at Nagoya, I was looking across the stands and I saw Aizen's assistant there, Gin. He was looking right at me, but in a blink he was gone. I thought it was all in my head, but when I came home, Karin told me that Ichinose Maki had stopped at our house and told her to give me a message: "Jin says hi, and me and Sousuke will see you soon." The guys full name was Kariya Jin, and Sousuke is Aizen's first name."

Renji's face grew even paler and his grip on Ichigo's arm grew uncomfortably tight. He heard Rukia gasp next to him. His friends were silent for some time before Rukia broke the silence.

"Ichigo this sounds really serious. Why can't you talk about this with Grimmjow? More to the point why haven't you told the police?"

"In the hotel," Ichigo shuddered, clutching his left arm to his abdomen, "Grimm was really angry. He threw the guy off me, obviously, but then he started hitting him. He hit him so many times that his face was covered in blood and all the bones were broken. And then he took out a knife. He was going to kill him. He would have if I wouldn't have stopped him. If he finds out that they are fucking with me, that Aizen threatened me...I don't think I can stop him a second time, Ruk."

His two friends exchanged a look as the severity of the situation dawned on them.

"Ichigo you need to tell someone," Renji said firmly, eyebrows knit together in worry.

"I just did," Ichigo said as he coughed out a dry, humorless laugh. "This was all my fault and I don't want anyone else to be involved."

"Well that's not fucking good enough!" Renji growled. He was about to continue when Rukia held up a small hand. She then placed both of them around Ichigo's, holding them softly in her grip as she met his eyes and looked searchingly. The intimacy made Ichigo uncomfortable, and he was about to turn his head when she spoke.

"I will not, at the risk of alienating you from us, force you to talk to the police or anyone else. When we told you to tell us what was bothering you we said you could trust us and I won't fall short on that promise. But," she said, eyes growing stern with determination, "you need to make us a promise here and now."

"What is that," Ichigo said, tensing at the thought of her request.

"You need to promise us two things: one, you will put my brother's number on speed dial. He didn't become captain of the Nagoya precinct at the age of 31 because he is incompetent. If anything else happens, or if you are threatened again, you will call him immediately and talk to him. Two, you will not from this point forward go anywhere alone. If you can't do that then I will be forced to get involved on behalf of your own well-being. Can you do that?"

"Yes," Ichigo nodded, looking between his two friends. "I promise you both."

"Said he'd be here soon, Aizen-san."

"Thank you, Ichimaru. You know how dreadfully impatient I can get."

Standing in an alleyway near the center of the maze of Karakura's back roads, like a single darkened corner of the earth where there was no light or life, Aizen waited. This particular spot was virtually impossible to find, housing nothing more than an abandoned shack made of corrugated steel roofing tinged with rust, and leading to nowhere that any sensible person wanted to be.

That's exactly why he had chosen it for his meeting place.

Suddenly they heard a set of scampering footsteps approaching. Gin wore an uncharacteristic frown and placed a practiced hand on the large knife in his belt as they both waited silently. In a matter of moments, and slender, panting figure emerged from the darkened alley ahead. The figure bowed deeply, albeit not gracefully.

"I'm here, Aizen-sama," the boy heaved as he tried to catch his breath. Aizen could hear the fear wrapped around the choked syllables. He smiled wider.

"Ichinose-kun, I'm glad you decided to join us."

"Of course, Aizen-sama," he said as he stood straight, the stupid, excited grin on his face reminding him of a puppy. "I would never miss a chance t-"

"That's very kind, Ichinose-kun," Aizen said with fake kindness, the boys face shifting again to relay his terror.

Much better.

After several moments of silence, the young man could no longer hold his tongue.

"Ichimaru-san said that you needed me for something," he said softly. Aizen smiled wider.

"Yes, Ichinose-kun, I do indeed need your help again. In fact, it is only you who can do this job for me." He watched as the ignorant youth's face lit up again with joy.

"Anything you ask, Aizen-sama."

"That's very good to hear," he purred in satisfaction, eyes narrowing almost imperceptibly. "First things first, I have a job for you. It's on the east side of town, you serviced him last week. You must have made quite the impression, he requested you specifically." Aizen watched as the boy's face grew paler even in the faint light of the alley, and he felt a warm feeling spread through him at the thought of Ichinose's dread.

"But Aizen-sama, you saw what he did to me last week. You said I wouldn't have to go back there until I healed. The doctor told me -"

"I'm sorry, Ichinose-kun, I must have misunderstood you before when you said I could ask anything of you. Your debt to me is still accruing interest, and with the demand of this particular type of job I was willing to bring down your balance considerably. But if you can't be bothered to do this for me..." He shrugged his shoulders lazily and smiled at the now shaking youth.

"No, sir, you didn't misunderstand. I'll go," he said quietly, his voice pinched. "I'm sorry."

"That's a good boy," Aizen drawled. "Oh and he told me you did some preparing before you went last time. Make sure you don't try that again. It ruins the fun for him, you see."

"Yes, Aizen-sama," he said again, sounding on the verge of tears. Rolling his head in Gin's direction, Aizen nodded at him and watched as he passed an address to the young man, who accepted it without so much as a glance.

"Will that be all, sir?"

"Not quite," Aizen said, feeling his pulse quicken just slightly at the thought of his next request. "That job was just a coincidence. The real reason I called you here is a completely different task. As I said, only you can do it." The trembling boy finally looked up, eyes like that of a frightened child as he spoke.

"What is it?"

"I need you to round up some of your friends and help me teach an old pupil of mine a lesson."

"What kind of lesson, sir," Ichinose inquired cautiously. Aizen smiled an oily grin, eyes distant as his mind imagined the chaos that lie ahead.

"That I can take anything from him, starting with the boy he loves."