Couch Scene: The Simpsons ran to the couch and suddenly everything is normal until the Springfield Mafia comes and points a gun at Homer because he won't pay them.
Ralph the Word: "..." Ralph just stood there.
"Uh... Ralph say something." The Narrator spoke.
Ralph just walked away without talking.
Homer and his family were walking in downtown Springfield. It was a beautiful day and...
"Hey! Shut up already." Homer said to the Narrator.
"Homer? Who are you talking to?" Marge asked.
"Yeah? You've been acting crazy for a while." Bart said.
"I'm not crazy. This narrator keeps annoying me." Homer said.
"Don't see anyone." Lisa said.
"I can't see him too, I can only hear his stupid voice." Homer said.
You do realize you're the only one who can hear me?
"I guess so..."
Anyway, I'm narrating this story and I've always have. Now just pretend that you can't hear my voice.
"Fine..." Homer said.
"Who are you talking to? Is it your imaginary friend, the narrator, again?" Bart joked.
"No. There's no such thing as... a... Narrator..." Homer said in anger. "Huh? What happened to the gun shop over there?"
The family saw the gun shop still selling guns but with a different look. The most noticeable was a different flag.
"What's with that stupid flag over there?" Homer said.
"That flag happens to be the flag of England you American twit. All you do is go to your fast foods, create more wars, your small businesses and talk about peace but can't do it, and your fast foods." The British Man said.
"You already said fast foods. Plus, you're talking about a Republican. They support military power and small businesses." Lisa said.
"You Americans always trying to give us excuses." The British man said.
"Lots of countries make up excuses. Even your country did." Lisa said.
"Uh huh. Say that Bill Clinton and Richard Nixon."
"Now with the presidents... You know, all our US presidents have done both good and bad things." Lisa said.
"Again with the excuses..." The British man said as he walked away.
"The British can be so irritating sometimes..." Marge said until the family noticed something about the Kwik-E-Mart.
"There's a British Flag on the Kwik-E-Mart." Bart said.
Suddenly the family notice there were British flags all over different shops which surprised the family.
"Oh well. At least they haven't stole my favorite place to hang out." Homer said as he entered Moe's Tavern. Suddenly he got kicked out by a bunch of British men. "What was that for."
"Sorry, but we need a British Bar and we will have a British Bar." One of the British men said.
"You monsters!" Homer said.
Later at a Town Meeting at the Springfield Town Hall.
The citizens of Springfield were very angry and mad about the situation in Springfield. Lots of property that once belonged to Springfield were now in the hands of the British.
"Settle down people!" Mayor Quimby said as he tried to calm the people. "The British may have taken most of our..."
Suddenly a man in a suit came and whispered to his ear.
"Dear god! They bought the whole town! I mean... uh... who likes bacon!" Mayor Quimby said as he tried to keep the Springfieldians under control as they shouted, pushed, and were angry at each other. "People, people, people!"
The crowd suddenly pulled out pitch forks and torches.
"Oh god. They're going to destroy the town with that. Uh... Clancy Bouvier! Can you keep the crowd peaceful for a few minutes." Mayor Quimby said.
"QUIET DOWN YOU BUNCH OF 'BLEEP'." Clancy Bouvier said.
Suddenly the whole group of Springfieldians sat down silently.
"Finally! I got your attention. Anyway, were dealing with a serious matter of crisis here people! The British are now messing us Americans and we have no way to beat them." Quimby said.
"Of course you don't." A British man said along with two other British men as they entered the Springfield Town Hall. "We now own everything and were going to destroy it. You have twenty four hours to leave."
"What are you sick bastards up to?" Moe said.
"Why, were just going to have our own small British town. We already controlled other towns and now this one will be in our control soon." The British men said.
"Hey!" Grandpa Abe said. "What happened to us now! All we do is argue and try to make peace agreements. You know what patriots did back than in the American Revolution? We beat the crap out of the British and we should do it again!"
"The old man is right!" Homer said as he got out of his seat.
"You want to fight tubby?" The British man said as he was going to charge at Homer.
Homer easily stopped him by using one finger on his forehead. The British man tried to punch Homer but he couldn't.
"Can I try?" Lisa said.
"Go nuts." Homer said as Lisa also stopped the British Man with one finger on the forehead.
Suddenly all the Springfieldians were laughing.
"Okay honey. I'm going to have a talk with the man." Homer said to Lisa as she stopped.
Suddenly Homer raised his fist and punched the British man twice. He kept on punching him and then suddenly others joined as they beaten the three British men out of the Town hall. Now they were outside.
"Do what you will, but your town isn't safe!" The British man laughed.
"Than we will fight our longest enemy once again!" Homer said.
"Yeah!" Moe said.
"I'm doing the talking Moe. Anyway, British man. We will defeat your... what kind of club or organization do you work for?"
"The Agency of Taking-over-Towns and Stuff. Also known as an A.T.S" The British man said.
"That's not very creative... Anyway you're going to have to be captured now.
"You can't capture me. I'm just a messenger." The British man said.
Get used to the stupidity around here because this is... SPRINGFIELD!" Homer said as he kicked the British man to a well in the middle of a sidewalk in a similar scene in the movie, "300".
Suddenly other men pushed the two other men into the well.
"Well that's done... Wait a minute? When did we ever have a well in the middle of a sidewalk?" Homer said.
"Like you said Homer. This is Springfield." Moe said.
"Hello?" The British men said in the well.
"Will get you out after we deal with the rest of your ATS members." Homer said.
Bart was playing his Call of Duty: MW2 on his PC in his room.
"Dang it! Stupid Shotguns and Machine Pistols. Why the heck are they secondary weapons?" Bart said in the darkness as there were snacks everywhere, his room was messy, and his hair and clothes were dirty. "And what's with these game modes! All these normal game modes feel like Hardcode mode, just with a HUD this time."
"What's wrong Bart?" Lisa said as he entered the room and turned on the lights causing Bart to hiss at her.
"There are noobs all over the game. I keep on getting shot by these overpowering weapons." Bart said.
"Why not get that new Call of Duty game. Black Ops?" Lisa said.
"It's already out? Plus, there's this poll that says that MW2 is better than Black Ops." Bart said.
"You do know that the voters of MW2 are mostly made up of beginners, noobs, and people who have a hard time using skilled weapons in other Call of Duty games?" Lisa said.
"Oh, okay than." Bart said as he left his room and ran down the stairs.
As Bart was at the first floor of his house he saw his dad and other men with guns, knives, and some other things that aren't usually a weapon like brooms, frying pans, and an fire axe.
"What are you doing Homer?" Bart said.
"Getting ready to fight the British." Homer said.
"Oh okay, anyway can I have 60$ to buy this new video game."
"Sure, why not?" Homer said as he pulled out his wallet.
Suddenly Abe Simpson and Clancy Bouvier appeared out of nowhere and punched Homer in the face causing him to fall to the floor.
"What the hell are you doing?" Abe said.
"Yes, if there's something we both agree, it's that your giving money to that child. What did he ever do to earn it?" Clancy Bouvier said.
"Well, I guess so..." Homer said. Suddenly Clancy Bouvier punched him again. "Ow... what was that for?"
"For marrying my daughter you lazy bum." Clancy Bouvier said as he punched Homer in the face again. "That one was just for fun. Anyway, Bart. Get a job or do some chores around the house."
"You can't make me get a job!" Bart said.
Three hours later.
"I'm exhausted from finding a job..." Bart said on the couch as Marge entered the TV room.
"What's wrong sweetie?" Marge said.
"Trying to find a job so I can buy game... need game... game..." Bart said in a zombie like voice.
"Well... there's always that new small music Shop that just opened. They only have one employee there. They just need one employee and there looking for young employees." Marge said.
"I'll go try." Bart said.
Bart was holding a resume of his own as he was in front of the Music Shop called "The Feel"
Bart entered it and saw music CDs, Records, Tapes, Music Videos, and even headphones to try out the song. Bart also saw teenagers and college students trying to get the job.
"Who are you?" A tall man said.
He had small clear glasses, long black hair, wore jeans, blue jacket, and a white shirt, facial hair, and some wrinkles.
"I'm trying to get the new job here." Bart said.
"Oh, your hired than." The tall man said.
"Wait? Why is that boy hired? This job needs young employees and what does he have for the job!" A college student said.
"Yeah, I didn't say young adults and this boy looks like he has... something... I really don't know... Anyway, who did I hired again?" The old man said as he looked confused.
"You hired me, Bart. Down here." Bart said.
"Oh hell Bert." The old man said.
"Are you high or stupid?"
"I can assure you that I'm not stupid and... hey cool... a music shop..." The tall man said as the college students and teenagers left. "Hey there kid. What's your name... I'm Ian..."
"I just told you my name." Bart said.
"Oh yeah, your Bart the new employee. Anyway Bratie, like all the other employees you have to clean this small store for no pay, but you can get paid for organizing the CDs, being the cashier, and help people finding the right music CD." Ian said. "Anyway Lisa you have to make sure that no one steals the cash."
"My name is Bart. Lisa is one of my little sisters." Bart said.
"Your sister is named Lisa. I must be psychic or something, is your mother the tooth fairy. Hey money." Ian said as he walked to the cashier and took money out of it and put it in his pockets. Suddenly he looked at the cashier and said, "Hey? Where did all the money go. Hey you Nick, do you know who stole it?"
"You stole the money. My name is Bart not Nick." Bart said as Ian looked at the money in his pockets and looked all surprised.
"I must be an evil twin. I wonder if my cousin Otto is still here?" Ian said.
"Otto? He's your cousin?" Bart said.
"Yeah little dude. Were both onto drugs. The only difference is that he likes metal rock and I like metal rock, but more of a Hippie way. Wait a minute? Who am I again? No, what am I?" Ian said.
"This guy is more confused than Homer chasing the dog when he stole his pork chops." Bart thought.
"Okay, we stand and fight men!" Homer said as he was with three hundred Springfieldians.
As Homer waited and waited, suddenly Barney was on a horse and yelled out, "The British are coming, the British are coming... and this time I'm not drunk."
Five hundred British men appeared out of nowhere as they stepped to the road of Springfield and saw an army of three hundred Springfieldians preparing to fight as they look at the power of the British and...
"Okay, okay we get it Narrator. You don't have to be that pacific, we have eyes you know." Home said to the sky as everyone was looking at him.
"Homer? Who are you talking to?" Moe asked.
"I'm talking to the Narra... Never mind, I'm talking to no one." Homer sighed as one of the British men opened his mouth.
"Were giving you a chance you give up! Leave now and no one gets hurt!" One of the British men said.
"We rather get hurt than see our town turn into a town where the Queen of England can take a vacation!" Homer said.
"You know Homer, that could make our town famous if the Queen of England came." Krusty said as everybody agreed.
"Why would she come to a town where I live. I mean I crashed a rented car into her." Homer said.
"What was that?" Lenny said.
"Uhh... nothing... forget what I just said... Anyway, fight!" Homer said as the Continental Army I mean... Springfieldians army and the British empire... I mean the British ATS army collided.
The British Empire... I meant the British ATS army... why do I keep saying that... tried to pushed the Springfieldians with their mighty force but even if they were outnumbered the Springfieldians pushed with their force and...
"Hey wait a minute? Why are we pushing these geezers? We have weapons and they don't. This is not Sparta people!" Moe said.
"I think we should run..." A British man said as the ATS members stopped pushing as the Springfieldians raised their guns at them.
Suddenly the ATS members fell to the ground as they got shot dead on the ground.
"Hasta la vista, baby!" Rainier Wolfcastle said as he was chasing British men with a large minigun.
"Hey Homer? Isn't this murder?" Carl said.
"Who cares?" Chief Wiggum said.
Homer, Lenny, Carl, Barney, and Moe were hiding in the bushes as there was a British camp at the beach of Springfield near there iron-made ship.
"Are we all in our Indian costumes?" Homer said.
"Yes." All the men answered.
"Okay." Moe said. "Now all we have to do is... Wait a minute? Who are you?"
"I'm a hippy, man. Just call me Ian." Ian said in his Indian costume. "Anyway, you like bacon?"
"Hold on a minute? I thought hippie's don't like bacon." Homer said.
"Really? Well, I guess I'll just leave, man." Ian said as he ate a hamburger to replace the bacon.
"Anyway... we have to..."
"Who are you people?" A British man said as he saw the Indians in disguised.
"Uh... we are... Indians who...want to... make a casino for the British when they take over the town..." Homer said still worried.
"I don't know... this seems somehow familiar... it's as if you're going to blow up our ship... just like back in the American Revolution..." The British man said.
"What do you mean?" Lenny said.
Suddenly the British man got knocked out by a big baseball bat.
"Take that British man." Ian said.
"Thank you Ian." Homer said.
"No problem, Older Bart." Ian said to Homer. "That guy should stay to the ground for stealing my stash."
"Uh huh... By the way, how do you know the name Bart?" Homer said.
"You don't remember Older Bart? The future really has gotten to you. You used to work in my music shop." Ian said. "Anyway, what are we doing?"
"Were going to blow up that ship and toss there tea and any other drinks they have." Homer said.
"And then we shoot those British bastards, American style!" Moe said.
"Moe, take it easy man. We're not doing that. We may have shot those British before, but that was our first American-British battle." Homer said.
"Okay, but it seemed to work for me the last time." Moe said. "Those British stealing my bar... turning it into some kind of fancy pub..."
Homer and the rest of the gang were pouring tea and other drinks into the ocean as the Britain's weren't looking.
"That's the last of it." Homer said.
"Last of what?" Ian said as he was drinking a beer.
"Ian, don't drink that ten-pack you have to..." Lenny said until Homer stopped him.
"Ten-pack, eh..." Homer said.
Later at The Simpsons house.
Marge was outside as she grabbed the mail from the mailbox. She saw a letter and read it. Out of nowhere, Marge suddenly heard old drums and old flutes that sounded like something you would hear in the American Revolution was in her head as she read it.
"Dear Marge, this is your lovely husband, Homer. You see I wanted to tell you that everyone survived as we destroyed the ship except for my ten-packs of beer... oh why God! Why did this happened! It was a ten-pack and... Quiet Narrator I'm trying to speak here.
Homer? Who are you talking to?
Moe! I'm talking to the freaking... never mind... anyway I love you Marge and good bye. I will see you soon...
Sincerely, Barney... BUUURPPPP!"
Homer was at a camp with other Springfieldians.
"We only have one machine gun left and supplies here." Moe said.
"Well than we'll just have to use what we have." Homer said.
"We could use these rocks and sticks as spears." Krusty said.
"We can use these two rocks to create a fire." Ned said.
"I can use this machine gun to shoot those birds for dinner." Homer said as he pointed the machine gun up to the sky and pressed the trigger as he shot bullets towards the sky as the rest of the people watched him. Suddenly only one bird fell to the ground.
"Uh... Homer... you just used our lest machine gun. Plus that bird you caught was just a butterfly." Moe said.
"Uh guys." Apu said. "Is it normal for the bullets that Homer just shot to come to the ground that fast."
"No, why... Oh holy no! Run for your lives everybody!" Kirk Van Houten said as everyone ran away from the campsite as bullets were raining down hard to the ground.
Suddenly the bullets stopped raining and everyone came back.
"No one got hurt. That's something good." Homer said as he was holding a can of beer.
Suddenly one bullet from the sky shot the can of beer in his hands and the beer was pouring out of the hole and to the ground.
"DOH!" Homer yelled extremely loud.
Later in a galaxy far far away.
"That's strange." Luke Skywalker said.
"What is it Kang?" Han Solo asked.
"I thought I heard an angered darkness stronger than the Sith but also round and fat that said, 'Doh', all for a beer." Luke Skywalker answered.
"What's a beer?" Han Solo asked.
"Hey Ian! I have a job for you." Homer said.
"Sure thing Older Bart." Ian said.
"Whatever, I want you to send this message to my wife just in case if anything happens to me. Anyway, I'm going to call one of our allies to help us in this battle." Homer said as he handed Ian a note.
Later at the Élysée Palace.
The President of France picked up his cell phone and saw a message in text on his phone. As he read it, drums and flutes was in his head that sounded like something you would hear in the American Revolution.
"Dear King of France... Wait a minute... they have a President now, Moe? Than... President of France, I am texting you this message because we are fighting the British. We know how much you hated the British back than and that now your allies to them, but we are not fighting the whole country, we are fighting the AT... something... We need your help before they turn our towns and other towns into a place where the British enters... who knows they might take over your...
Give me that!
Moe! What the heck are you doing?
Hey, these British people think there all better than you and they want to turn your cities into a place where they can use your flag as toilet paper... in fact I heard one of the British men saying that your mom cooks like a anteater. That's right ants in every one of your mom's cooking's
Sincerely your most hated friend, Moe."
"My mom is what?" The President of France said angrily.
Ian the Hippie Freak entered the Music store as he was wearing a toga.
"Where have you been and why are you wearing that toga!" Bart said.
"Older Bart! What a surprise. Your shorter now and I don't really know why I'm wearing this. The last time I remember is when I saw this car facing towards me." Ian said. "By the way, I'm sending a message to your wife."
"You mean Homer?" Bart said.
"If that's what you want to call it. What's this place?" Ian said.
"This is your business. Anyway, I'm supposed to be paid over two days ago after all the hard work I've done!" Bart said angrily.
"You actually did work? I was just joking back there. I just become lazy man. You should to." Ian said.
"But the store was clean before I got here. If your lazy than how is this clean before I got the job." Bart said.
"Some religious guy that says, 'Diddly' all the time cleans it. All you have to do is to pretend you're poor and weak. Plus, I'm not paying you." Ian said.
"What!" Bart said.
"Yeah, I'm not doing all that hard work to get the money. Just take what you need from that mystery machine." Ian said.
"You mean the cash machine. Can I take all of it?"
"Sure... I'm hippy who don't need money." Ian said as Bart quickly took all the money and ran off.
Ian walked towards the cash machine and opened it and looked surprised.
"My god! Some thief stole my money! Hey Bert! Someone stole my money man. I need it to buy playboy magazines." Ian said. "Bert?... Hey, what is this cool place, man?"
Homer and the other three hundred Springfieldians walked outside of Springfield and on a desert with one road. Suddenly he saw thousands of British men, but also saw one British man with a crown on a moving throne carried by ten strong British men. The ten British men carefully put the throne on the ground and the British man with the crown stepped out of the throne.
"Hello you Americans with your fast food restaurants. I am George Hungleberry." George Hungleberry said as suddenly both the Americans and British were laughing at him.
"What kind of last name is Hungleberry?" Homer smiled and laughed.
"Shush! American! Just give up and you will not be smite by the power of the British!" George said.
"Who cares. What kind of last name is Hungleberry?" Dr. Hibbert said.
"Enough about my last name! Attack attack attack!" George said repeatedly.
"Okay... We may fall to the ground men but like that one Webster guy something something said. We were born as an American, we lived as an American, and we will eat like an American!" Homer said.
"Uh Homer. It's die as an American." Barney said.
"DIE?" All the Springfieldians said as they dropped their weapons and ran in circles screaming.
"So this is a video game." Ian said as he was playing Black Ops with Bart on the PC at the music store.
"Yep." Bart said.
"You know, I feel like I forgot something." Ian said.
"Is it this?" Bart said as he handed him a note with a message.
"Thanks little dude." The tall man said as he took the message and sneezed on it as a tissue paper. "Wait a minute... This is the note... And someone sneezed on it... Who would do such a thing... oh well..."
"Coming, coming." Marge said as she opened the door as a person kept on ringing the door. "Who are you?"
"I'm your husband's friend. Ian." Ian said.
"Yes, what is it?" Marge said as Ian did not answered but was staring at her. "What are you staring at..."
Suddenly Marge slapped Ian in the cheek.
"Sorry, but you have a nice chest." Ian smiled. "Anyway, here's the message from Homer."
"This message is covered in snot." Marge said.
"Oh yeah, some guy sneezed on it. I haven't found out yet, but I think he was the same one who stole my money, my wallet, and the same one who framed me of me burning down the police station. If only I knew who he was." Ian said.
"Uh huh..." Marge said as she read the letter and heard drum and flute music in her head again.
"Dear Marge... If you are reading this I have either died by the British's cold blooded hands or I died by watching Halloween: Season of the Witch. Plus, at first everyone survived, but than later it was the ten-pack, than that one can of beer from the bullets which I caused, and than Mr. Molemen, though we could've save them because the British retreated but my reason was... I choose not to... any way..."
"I can't read any further." Marge cried.
"I know that your husband died but..."
"That too, but there's snot on most of these words." Marge cried.
"Oh than... good luck being a widower." Ian said.
"Or not!" Homer said as he was with the other Springfieldians.
"Homer!" Marge stopped crying.
"Older Bart!" Ian said.
"Wait a minute? Older Bart?" Marge said.
"Ian is very high that he thinks I'm Bart from the future. In fact, he acts like a hippy but he's actually violent to animals. I don't know what kind of man he is." Homer said to Marge.
"I see..." Marge said. "How did you survived?"
"How did I win, you mean. You see, the French appeared and surrounded the British army." Homer said. "For some reason, the President was punching the president of the ATS for making fun of his mom."
"Yes... his mom..." Moe chuckled in worry a little as he waved his eyes back and forth.
Later at a barbeque at Homer's backyard.
"This is a celebration to many things!" Homer said. "One, the defeat of the British, Two, befriended Ian the... I guess Hippy..., and Three, humiliating the British by letting them come to an American Barbeque with American Flags and American food." Homer laughed at the British ATS members.
"You may have won this time but we will return." George said as he took a bite out of his hand burger. Suddenly he raised his hamburger in both hands and looked at it with surprise. "MY GOD! You Americans with your fast foods are genius's!"
"You know... I feel like I forgot something." Homer said.
"Hello? Anyone here?" The British men said in the well.
"That fat man did promise to take us out of the well... right?" One of the British men said.
(Extra Scene)
Bart and Ian were playing Call of Duty Black Ops at the music store.
"You know little guy. I never had a father and what do I work as again in this shop?" Ian said.
"You know Ian... I can be your father and you work as a simple employee. uh... I'm your boss." Bart said.
"Really dad?" Ian, a tall guy said to Bart, a little boy.
"Give your dad a hug." Bart said.
"I have a dad!" Ian smiled as he hugged Bart.
"NOW GET BACK TO WORK!" Bart yelled.
"I have a dad..." Ian grunted
"What did you say!" Bart yelled.
"Nothing boss. I'm onto... whatever I was doing..." Ian said.
(Incase you haven't notice, parts of it is a spoof of the movie, "300" and makes a reference to The American Revolution)