Chapter Twentyone ~ Princess Anne
"With what? How did he get poisoned? Severus, I don't understand!" Poppy waved her wand over the child again, being watched by the still-crying little boy.
Severus had jumped up from the chair after Poppy had moved to the other side and went to get the child's clothes from the dresser he had placed Harry's clothes in earlier.
"Severus, what are you doing?"
"The flower, he has the flower –"
"What flower?" She looked at him as if he was imagining things.
"The Flower of Life, Poppy! The Rose!" He searched through Harry's pants.
"The … Rose? The Rose!" Startled, Poppy stopped waving her wand and turned to the Potions Master. "He has the Rose?" She asked again in complete astonishment. "How… ?"
Severus did not hear her. He had found a leather pouch and had opened it, shaking out its contents carefully. Now, in the palm of his potion-stained hands lay a small flower bud, a dark red rose, with a silver glittery shining light surrounding it. There were maybe one or two leaves left on it.
Looking up, he met Harry's teary eyes, locking his with the child's. He carefully brushed the little mind, sending it a message. 'I will never leave you. You are mine, I love you.'
'Daddy,' he heard the little ones voice in his head. 'I love you too. I'm sorry.'
"Don't." The older wizard rushed forward to the child's side, placed the flower and pouch on the white sheets and grabbed the cramped little hands, which still held the little crystal dragon. "You don't have any reason to apologize. We will save you; I'm not ready to let you go."
He moved his hands to lay them around the child's cheeks, wiping the tears away softly with his thumbs, placed a gentle kiss on the pale forehead and stayed like this for a while.
"Severus?"
The Potions Professor didn't want to move. He wanted to stay here and breathe in his son's scent and feel his warmth.
"Severus?"
He felt Poppy's hand on his arm. He didn't want to look at her. But he did.
"I'm going to run some tests to find out what he's been poisoned with. I will be in and out."
He nodded at her. 'Whatever.'
She took some vials from a little table next to her and went into her office.
Carefully, he picked up that blasted flower and placed it back into the pouch. He extended the string on it a little and slipped it over his head to keep it warmed. He let it fall into the inside of his clothes, against his skin. He would have to do more research on it later.
And right now, he had to wait for Poppy to find out how the child was poisoned.
"All right, son, let's play a game." He sat himself next to Harry's bed on his chair, laying one hand on the boy's hand.
"I will ask you questions, and you will answer with yes and no. Yes is closing your eyes, counting to three and opening them. No is not closing them at all, keeping them open while counting to three, too. Blinking is allowed, but doesn't count. All right?"
The little one looked at him, eyes closing and after the count three, opened. Severus felt himself smiling.
"All right, now here we go, listen closely. Outside of Hogwarts is a forest, it's called the forbidden forest. You are not allowed to go in there. But there are unicorns living. And in the spring there will be some foals. Now, the baby unicorns don't have horns when they are born, they grow later. Actually, when the unicorns don't have a horn you could almost mistake them with a normal, ordinary horse foal. Except that there are no white foals, unless they are albino. A white horse will have a black foal that later on turns white too. Unicorns are usually born white. Sometimes they are very light grey. But there are no brown ones or chestnut or blonde. Very rarely, there is a black one or dark grey and sometimes there are even black ones in adulthood. In the herd outside, in the forbidden forest, there is one black stallion and two dark grey mares. But there must be at least twenty white stallion and mares. Normally in a herd, there are always more mares than stallions. Unicorns are different. They have a more family sense than normal horses."
While he was speaking, he looked at his child. Harry was listening, concentrating. The potions master distracted not just himself but also the boy from nervousness. He could hear Poppy moving around her office and small laboratory. He pretty much covered what was in the book.
"Now, I will ask you some questions about this text and you will answer with yes or no. The unicorn foals born have the colours tan, silver and pink. Do you agree?"
He almost could hear the child giggle. Arching up an eyebrow, Harry looked back without a blink. Severus counting to three silently.
"Good boy." The professor felt proud of the little boy and squeezed his hand for a moment. "The next one: The baby unicorn will tell the mother when it wants to be born by poking her with its horn. Correct?"
Again, the little one gave a sign to "no."
Severus was smiling at him, giving praise.
"Unicorns live in a family clan. True or false?"
Harry closed his eyes and counted. "Yes."
And Severus asked the next question.
After the sixth question the Potions Master realized the child getting tired. Harry's eyes closed more and stayed closed longer.
"It's all right, son, go take a nap. I'll be right here."
And as the child's even breathing told him, he fell asleep.
- . -
Bad dreams were chasing the little guy.
He was back at the Dursley's, but he couldn't move. And when Dudley was bashing him, his blows went right through him. With his body, he couldn't feel a thing but it hurt in his mind. He tried to pick up his arms, to protect his face at least but they felt so heavy, he couldn't move them. He wondered if he had any arms at all. Then, he wanted to pick up his legs to run away but he realized suddenly that the legs he was using before his whole life weren't his. They belonged to Professor Dumbledore and the Professor was standing next to him, wanting them back.
If Harry could have, he would have been tossing and turning. But only sweat that was running down his forehead showed his silent despair.
Severus had not moved an inch from Harry's side. He was reading The Flower of Life book again, now that he had the rose, he understood some things much better.
Once in a while he dozed a little. He would have slept better in his own bed, but he did not want to leave the child alone.
When he was awake, he heard Poppy still moving around in her office. Obviously, she did not find yet what she was looking for.
While he was resting, he was wondering to himself of what the flower was made of. It didn't say anything particular in the book. Perhaps he should go and do some research after all. But he couldn't move from the child's side.
How long would it take for his son to die? How much time had he left?
He realized he wasn't reading anymore and just staring into his book. Looking at his son sleeping, he saw his silent distress immediately.
'My child!' Without paying much attention, he dropped the book on the end of Harry's bed and moved to sit on the side of the mattress and grab the child's shoulders with both hands, carefully calling his name to not to startle him.
"Harry, Harry? Wake up, Little One, you're dreaming. Come on, darling, open your eyes, come back to me, please -"
Big emerald coloured eyes opened and were looking at him and he felt so relieved. His hands moved to the child's neck to caress him and to kiss his forehead softly. He couldn't keep his hands off of the child. Still rubbing his neck, he leaned back to look at the little boy closely. The child was mostly skin and bones. Every little muscle or fat he gained while staying at Spinner's End was gone again. 'What can I do for you? What can I do to help you?' He was worried. He knew they were running out of time.
He knew that Poppy was fighting for the Little One. And so was he. He laid his head down next to Harry on the pillow and closed his eyes.
- . -
"Harry," Severus looked at the pale thin child lying on the bed under soft, fluffy covers next to him. It must be very early in the morning. The sun hadn't risen yet but dawn was just breaking.
A little over one week, he'd had him and now he looked skinnier and sicklier than he was when Severus had found him. Severus didn't understand. How could this happen? The child had eaten at least four times daily. Small portions, but he had eaten! It must have been that blasted flower.
Locking his black eyes with the emeralds, which seemed like twinkling stars in the half-light of the early morning, he sat back up on the comfortable chair next to Harry's bed and took Harry's tender hand in his. Harry's skin was wax coloured, his eyes sunken in – they looked huge. His mouth was dark red, with a pale frame around it. His hair was messy and had started to fall out creating bald spots.
"My Harry," Severus took Harry's hand to his lips to kiss it. "Sweet child." He knew this child was dying; it was just a matter of time.
He brushed the child's mind. "Legilimens," and carefully slipped in.
Once again, he found himself standing in the sitting room of Spinner's End. "Harry?" he whispered and suddenly the picture was fading. The potions master was left, standing in darkness.
"Daddy…" the little skinny child was whispering in his mind.
"Little One, where are you?"
"I'm here, here."
And there was a light, golden sunlight twinkling through green leaves waving in a gentle warm breeze. Birds were singing and Severus was sure he heard water gurgling through a river bed somewhere close. A faint voice was calling "Lily? Severus? Where are you?"
Looking around, seeing the tree trunk and the green curtains out of leaves hanging down, Severus suddenly knew where he was. It was Harry's imagination of the green room. He felt warmth spreading through his body by the love he felt for Lily's little child. Soon, he knew, the little guy would be with his childhood friend.
"Do you think she will find us here?" his thoughts were interrupted by a hoarse whisper. Turning around he saw the child sitting on a log by a small wooden table, smiling at him. A black kneazle was lying on another log, sleeping.
"No, we're safe here. She had never found us when Lily and I were little." Returning the smile, he sat down on the bench across from the child. He suddenly realised a purple bird was circling in the top of the tree. 'Of course it would be there,' he thought nodding silently. He brought his thoughts back to Harry, when he saw the child stand up and moving out of the room.
"Come," he heard the child say and held the curtain of leaves open for Severus to step through, too. He did and he was standing in a green, sunny forest. Looking around, he saw his little son standing on the river bench, not far away from him, laughing at him and holding two small wooden boats in his hand. One had a green sail; the other one had a red one. Stepping closer, Severus realised that on the red sail was a picture of a silver snake, slithering at him and on the green one a crystal white dragon, who was spitting golden flames. When Severus looked down to Harry, he also realized that he himself looked younger, like he'd be 12 or 14 years old.
Smiling, he heard Harry's laughter. "Let's race," he called out to Severus. "Let's race!"
The older man suddenly felt the kind of excitement run through him he'd felt racing with Lily. 'We need a prize,' he thought and to the little one he said: "When you win…"
"When I win," the child interrupted him with a wicked smile and handing him the boat with the dragon sail. "When I win, you owe me an elderberry cake." Giggling he added "And don't forget the sugar on top."
Shaking his head in disbelieve, Severus answered, trying to keep a plain face. "You must be joking. And what do you do, when I win?" He couldn't help it, a smile spread on his face, lightening it.
"I will give you a kiss?"
"I want a kiss anyway, doesn't matter if I lose or win."
"OK, a kiss. And…?"
"When I win," Severus said hoarsely, "You stay with me forever."
"Oh, Daddy, I do that anyway. But what do you want when you win? In real?"
"You. I want you."
The little boy sighed. 'Gosh,these grown ups.' "In real, Daddy."
"All right, in real. Let me think." He sat down on the river bench, gently touching the small wooden boat and thinking. The child sat down next to him, watching him carefully and enjoying this strange situation. What could the potions master want for a prize?
Severus asked himself the exact same question. 'What could I want for a prize? Every thing he can give, he already gave me. I don't want him to cook or bake something for me, the blasted relatives of him have taken too much of the boy already to last a life time. I would want something special – either way, he wins…'
"All right, I have something."
"Yes?" The little boy looked curious at him.
"When I win, I want you to help me baking the elderberry cakes and I want you to help picking the berries."
"But…"
"No buts, Harry. You have given me everything I ever wanted. I wish for you to stay with me forever, and that wish is beyond your giving. All I want is to be with you, to spend time with you."
"Daddy… I love you."
"I love you too, son." And he found himself being hugged by the little boy. His arms just went around the child to hold him close, the red boat's mast, which he still held in his hand, softly poked into Harry's back. It tickled the little child, and he started giggling.
"All right," Severus said slightly annoyed. "Let's race."
Still grinning, the boy slid off of the elders lap, collecting his abandoned boat from the shore.
"From where to where is the race?" he asked, turning to Severus.
Severus walked up the small river a little, passing two curves. "Here, that's where it starts. Step on this rock and put the boat on the right side of it. I'll have mine on its left. When I say 'GO' you let it go, understood?"
"Yes Sir!" Happily grinning, the child stepped with a big step on the flat rock in the middle of the river, kneeling down and held the little boat on its mast close. He could feel the water whirl touching the boat and the current wanting to take the boat along. Letgo,letgo, it gurgled at Harry. He felt excited and happy, free, and peaceful. That's how he'd always wanted his life to be. That's what he'd wished for. A friend, a Daddy, to spend time with and do great things with. Just like this.
Looking around, he saw just trees. Pine, Oak, Beech, Elm, Basswood, Maple, Ash, Alder, Hazel, Spruce, Cedar, Willow, Aspen, Birch, and other's he didn't know the names of. Some flowers and weeds he didn't know where growing on the embankment. The warm sun was shining through the leaves, making him believe this was a magic place. In his mind, it was summer. He heard birds singing and once in a while there were coming closer, sitting on the willow or hazel right on the waters edge. Upstream, he saw a mallard duck family with six ducklings swimming. More to his right, he heard a woodpecker digging into the wood in a steady rhythm. But as much as he tried, he could not see it. But he could see some sparrows, finches and thrushes. He was sure he also saw a swallow. And he knew somewhere was the purple Martin, the Elderberry bird. He heard the squelch of a hawk and the "shuh" of an owl.
He almost forgot the race and him holding the boat. He came back at once, when he felt a warm tickle on his left ear. "Dreaming?" A dark voice whispered into his ear.
He leaned in the direction on the voice and felt a warm, soft body. Turning his head, he looked right into shining black eyes.
"Yes," he answered. "Can you hear the birds?"
"Yes, I can. It's a beautiful place." And after a pause he asked: "Do you still want do the race?"
"Yes, of course."
"You're ready?"
"Waiting."
"Yeah, right. Dreaming, that's what you're doing."
"Ready, Daddy."
"All right. Ready?"
"Yes!"
"Set -"
Harry felt the excitement rush through his body like spreading fire. It ran from head to toe and back.
"GO!"
And both let go of their ships.
Harry almost fell from the rock when he jumped down to follow his boat on the shore, screaming for it to go faster.
Severus followed the child on the shore, also to spur his boat on. "Go, go, go… faster, yes, go!" Severus felt himself be little again, 7, 8 and 9 at the same time, like he had been when he raced with Lily. Next to him, the little boy was jumping up and down, shouts of encouragements towards his boat.
In the water, two boats where fighting for the first place. They were just going into the first curve.
"Ready about, hard to lee," Severus called out. The green vessel had its bow up front. But in the curve, it got passed by the red.
"Set sail," yelled the little boy next to him. "Set the sails" as if it would be alive and real.
The water must have felt sorry for the child and Severus' boat was struggling in a water whirl. With hand movements and calling out, Severus tried to show his boat around. It worked.
Head to head, they were sailing in the water while Harry and Severus followed them on the shore into the second curve. The red sailed boat passed the green completely but it got stuck on a piece of wood sticking out from the shore.
The green passed the stuck red one but it got itself free to race behind. Right after the curve, the green got stuck in a strudel and was turning in circles.
"Noooo," the child next to Severus screamed and Severus felt excitement run through him.
"Yessss," he yelled, clapping his hands. That was exactly the time his little boat needed to catch up.
Now both boats were going again, head to head, straight down the river to the big river bench where the river would turn to a small waterfall into the canyon and the race would be over.
The silver snake was sizzling towards the dragon on the red sail and it spit golden flames at the snake. "Don't burn it," Harry yelled. "Then you are disqualified!"
Severus couldn't help it. He started laughing. The boy looked up to him, grinning. Then they turned back towards their boats and cheered them on for the long stretch until the finish line.
"Go, go, go, go…" Harry was yelling, still jumping up and down.
"Go, go, go, go…" Severus was calling toward his boat, barely standing still himself.
But all the screaming didn't help, the red dragon passed the green snake and hit the stick first, that Severus had laid across the river for stopping the boats.
"I won," Severus whispered in disbelief.
"I lost." Harry smiled, pulling the green sail boat out of the water and dancing happily around. "I lost, I lost, we're baking Elderberry cakes anyway, I lost, I lost…"
Slightly, Severus was wondering if the child had lost on purpose, but got rid of the thought quickly. It didn't really matter. The child had promised to spend time with him. That alone was like a promise to live.
He pulled the red dragon boat out of the water and sat down on a sunny rock. The child sat down next to him, holding a small flowered wreath up, both boats by their feet.
"It's yours. You won."
Carefully, Severus took it. It looked almost like the ones Lily had made, but not so neat. But for him, it didn't matter, it was the most beautiful wreath he'd ever won. "Thank you," he said and placed it into his inside breast pocket. The he laid an arm around his son, pulling him close to himself.
A warm summer breeze made the leaves around move and playing in their hair. The sun was shining through the leaves, making them believe this was a magic place.
- . –
"Daddy?"
"Hmm?"
"What is the necklace for?"
"What necklace?"
"The one I'm wearing. I realised it was there."
Severus kissed the little head and looked down at his son. Harry had moved his shirt and now they could see the golden amulet with the green stone in the middle resting on the child's bare pale skin.
"It's an amulet, Son, not a necklace. And it's there for your protection."
"My protection, Daddy?"
"Yes, son. There are ancient charms on it, which will protect you. My mother placed a charm on it and so did I. You are protected by our love for you."
"But I don't know your mother. How would you know that she would love and protect me?"
"Little One, you must trust me. I know she would. I used to wear this amulet myself. The charms on it are very strong and very old. Promise me that you will never take it off."
"It will protect me?"
"Yes, Son, it will. Promise me. Say it."
With a sigh, Harry cuddled closer and said: "I promise. I promise I will never take off the amulet."
Relieved, Severus nodded. "Thank you."
"Thank you, too."
- . -
"Daddy?"
"Yes, son?"
"I'm thirsty."
"For real?"
"Yes. Can you give me something?"
Slowly nodding, he answered: "Yes, I can try."
Standing up, they moved back into the green room, where they placed the boats on a shelf.
"Daddy?"
"Yes, son?"
"Will you come back?"
"Do you want me to?"
"Yes, please Daddy. Please come back."
"I will."
And he withdrew from the little mind. Green emerald eyes were following him as he got a cloth, wetting it with water and laid it in the child's mouth on his tongue. The boy was not able to open his mouth anymore, so Severus had to open it with a finger and held it open to place the cloth inside. The child was now complete paralyzed, from head to toe. Only the eyes kept following his movements.
"Severus?"
When he looked up, he saw Poppy just sitting down into the chair on Harry's other side of the bed. She looked worn and tired. Big dark circles where under her eyes and she looked like if she'd cried.
"Poppy!" Severus was shocked. She looked so old suddenly.
"Severus, I can't do anything. We're losing him." Her lip trembled and a tear was falling down her cheek. "All this magic, and it's not possible to save a small child. There's nothing I can do." She took one of Harry's little hands in hers, squeezed it shortly and with a whispered - "I'm so sorry," - she stood up and fled into her own quarters.
Severus stared behind her for a moment. He knew how she felt, but the little one was still alive and even if he couldn't save him, he wanted to be strong for him as long as he was still around. It wasn't time to mourn yet.
- . -
Just when the sun was rising, promising a new sunny, cold winter day, Harry was closing down. His muscles were cramping, his breathing deepening and flattened, faster accelerate heartbeat and slowing down again in the next moment, eyes moving restlessly, sweat showing on his face and he started to tremble all over. All his muscles let go suddenly and he wet the bed, himself and the diarrhea became an unpleasant smell. When Severus placed his hand across the little wet forehead, it felt freezing cold and a minute later, burning hot. Severus knew what was happening. He waved his wand so child could be dry.
"Little one, darling, hold on, I'm coming to be with you," he was whispering to his child.
But he realized Harry couldn't hear him anymore, he had fallen into a coma.
Quickly, he laid himself next to the child on the bed, closing the private curtains around themselves and spelling them closed. He didn't want any interruptions.
Then he pulled his son close to him, laid his fingers onto the child's forehead and whispered: "Legilimens."
Darkness.
He couldn't be too late!
"Harry?"
But he got no answer.
"Harry, please, don't leave me like this. Please Harry!"
There, in the darkness was a small light, like a lumos from a wand. Severus stumbled forward. "Harry?"
Silence.
Something was touching his legs. When he looked down he saw professor, Harry's kneazle. He followed the kneazle into the silent darkness, towards the light, with the feeling of moving but not getting closer.
"Harry!" he screamed with despair. He was running out of time.
Suddenly, he saw a body lying in the blue cone of light on a dark brown earth ground. "Harry!" Relief streamed through the older wizards body, he wasn't too late yet as he ran towards the dim spotlight that turned into a soft yellow light floating in through the leaves of trees around him.
When he reached the small figure, he dropped to his knees, scooping one arm under the child's neck, with the other one gathering the boy close to himself, the kneazle purring next to them in the gentle spotlight surrounded by green darkness.
Harry could not speak up any more, he felt so weak.
"Thank you," the child whispered softly. He could feel his energy fading.
"Merlin –" Severus said his voice roughly. "Harry, I wish you would stay with me."
The child opened his eyes and looked at him. Green emeralds, so pretty, so very, very beautiful. He thought of Lily, again all the time passed his inner eye that he'd spent with her, known her. And then the view changed and he saw Harry. A little over one week, one week and two days, he had had the child with him. He had wished Harry would have stayed with him forever.
"Daddy…?"
"I'm here, Harry, I'm here."
"You see . . . the light?"
"Harry . . . "
"There . . . is a . . . light. It . . . touches . . . me . . ."
"Harry," Severus whispered desperately. "Don't go, - please . . ." He felt pressing Harry's hand on his cheek, just like Harry was doing the first time they'd met, on the graveyard, only nine days ago. He couldn't see the light since it was in the child's inner eye. ". . . Stay with me."
"Daddy . . . It wants . . . me to . . . follow. . ." He heard Harry whisper very silently. "Dad . . . love . . . you . . ." his voice fading.
"Oh Harry, I love you too." And tears ran down his face. He knew it was true. He loved this little one. His warrior, his little angel, the true prince of this world, which had come to him and touched his heart so softly.
"Wait," Severus called behind him, but Harry didn't wait. With a loud "thush" noise, the curtain of leaves were back in place, leaving him behind.
Carefully, he withdrew from the child's now dark mind. Caressing Harry's face softly and realizing the green eyes deeply staring into his own.
He knew Harry was gone.
He looked into the green, loving eyes one more time, before his hand closed them softly. The skin was ash coloured by now and faded into a yellow eggshell colour very quickly.
Severus just sat there, still holding Harry's hand close to him and stroking the boy's face softly with the other hand. "Now you are with Lily and - and . . . your . . . Dad," he whispered. "I . . . I miss you."
He didn't know how long he sat there at Harry's side, when he suddenly felt a warm hand on his shoulder. "Severus," a woman's voice was calling to him.
At first, he showed no reaction.
He didn't want to leave this place where his mind was, where Harry was still alive and with him – so close, just a life apart.