Hello! I just wanted to say thank you for reading, you are seriously the best bunch of readers and more than I could ever ask for. I tried my hardest to do a good job on this chapter, even if it is just a bit out of my comfort zone (don't worry, I'll get there with practice like this). Because of this please please please let me know how I did. What worked and what didn't? Anywho, now that that's all out of the way, ENJOY!

21: Annie, the Risk Taker

I pulled the headphones over my ears and scrolled through the songs until I settled on something that would calm me. Bob Dylan. That would ease the chatter in my mind. The next step in the preparation was clothing. The one constant problem and pleasure of women the world over, and my potential downfall. I sifted through the drawers three times before I finally decided on something. "You can do this. You've been sexy before." I lifted the dark purple lace from its home amongst the underwear, "And don't they say bravery is always rewarded?" I slid on the thong and searched for the matching bra. Once the bra was clasped I stared into the mirror, examining myself from various angles. I was so much more thin now, and whatever bulk there was had muscle behind it. The sheerness of the fabric scared me. I would have never worn something like this before all of this. But I should be confident; in any other situation I would have been, but this was different. This was Daryl. This was me going all in with a decent hand, but no clue what the other guy's tells were. Risk. But high-risk means high reward, I rationalized. I threw on grey yoga pants and a cute red sweater before stepping in front of the mirror again. I examined myself once more. "Not bad, old girl." My hair had been kind today, producing its usual waves just as I had hoped it would. I then took a seat in front of the reflection and began with my makeup regimen. Subtle. I needed subtle. But I also needed beautiful. Was I beautiful? Could I be? Or was I just so used to my reflection that I began to love what I saw out of familiarity? My mom used to say I was the prettiest thing she's ever seen, but that was probably just because she was my mother. They were supposed to say those things.

When I had deemed myself as good as it got I went on to tidy the room up, occasionally switching songs or humming a tune. This was what it was like before. Cleaning my room up on chore day, music blaring, trying to mix work and fun. I really miss those days.

Body groomed, clothes on, makeup applied, room clean. The ritual was almost finished. I took a peak outside to see how much daylight I had left; just about none. I did a few quick stretches and went back downstairs to join the group for dinner. When it had gotten too cold to retreat to the rooftop I had decided to resume my place in the corner seat. Head down. Polite but silent. This was the way it had to be. Arms length. Keep your distance. I am already making it difficult enough by getting closer to Daryl. He was the exception that I just had to make. I nibbled on my bread and listened to the various conversations that were happening around me. I tried to take it all in so I could remember when the time came. Table filled with people, smiles scribbled on their faces. The movement of hands and voices and other things that meant life. I wished then for a camera. Just one photo of them, like this, and maybe it would be enough company when the time comes. A mental note would have to do. The whole time I couldn't bring myself to look at Daryl. I was far too nervous, and I worried that if we made eye contact I might just melt into a pile of goo. It was much safer to keep my head down. When the meal was finished I helped clear the table, one of the few jobs of the winter months. They all went to huddle around the TV, but I returned to the den with my pipe and a good book. I needed to relax, and there was no better way that reading by the fire.

-o0o-

When I heard the click of the TV as it turned off all efforts to calm myself seemed to be of no use. The harder I tried to focus on the words on the page the more I seemed unable to do so. I heard someone sit on the couch, but I kept my eyes on the page. They flicked through the lines, not absorbing the words but giving me something to do. After a minute of that I sat up, picking up the pipe and looking towards the couch. There he was, reclined, looking at the ceiling or something, I couldn't figure out what. He did look rather good today. Then again, he looked good almost every day. Now I couldn't keep myself from looking at him. I could feel my heart begin to pound. Can't have that. I have to keep my head. I held the pipe to my lips and cleared the bowl. Packing one more bowl, my eyes fluttered up every few seconds to check that he was still there. I can do this. I can do this. I can totally do this. Annie, you're amazing. Who wouldn't want to be the object of your affections? I began working on the new bowl. You can do this, Annie. I looked over at him and smiled, releasing a large plume of smoke. I let out a laugh accidently.

"What's so funny?"

When those eyes met mine I immediately began to cough. Shit. Shit. I can't do this. My cough subsided. Why was he still looking at me? Oh, yeah, he asked me something. What did he say? "Just something in the book." I stared at the page once more. I saw him sit up from the corner of my eye, so I turned to face him.

"You gonna unlock the door?" I nodded, knowing if I tried to speak I would give myself away.

I stood up and took a breath, tossing the keys to him, "I'll be up in a minute." He disappeared upstairs. I made sure the fire would be safe overnight, taking many calming breaths in order to get my nerve up. I want this. In fact, if I could only have one thing in the world, right now, this would be it. This wasn't even just desperation talking, I actually really enjoyed his company. Even when he was grouchy he was nice to have around. I made my way upstairs, shutting and locking the door behind me with a sigh. When I turned around he was sitting on the edge of the bed, and then it all clicked.

There was heat inside me. It started in my stomach and first spread south. I want this. He looked up at me, and I realized it must have been strange to see me just standing there staring at him. I really want this. I squirmed slightly under his gaze, but somehow my strength prevailed. The heat had spread to my chest and through my arms and legs and I knew. I knew I was ready.

"What's wrong?" I could tell he was trying to read my expression, but how could he? He had never seen me like this. Hell, no one alive had ever seen me like this.

"Nothing." I slid my pants off as gracefully as I could and took the few steps to him. Standing there in-between his legs I pulled my sweater over my head. I couldn't help my smile at the look on his face when the fabric was tossed towards the dresser. I could hear my heart beating as I leaned down and grabbed the bottom of his shirt and began to pull it up. I held my breath in fear that he would stop me, but off came the shirt. I threw it to the side, keeping my focus on him. I placed a hand on the back of his neck and sat down. I want him. I leaned down and kissed him softly. When he didn't pull away I felt my confidence grow as I began to suck his bottom lip. I couldn't really remember the taste from the last time I had kissed him, but I don't think it would have mattered. It was the sweetest thing to touch my lips ever since. I felt a hand on my back, then another in my hair. It sent shivers through me, and the next thing I knew I felt his tongue on my lips. I hadn't felt this good. Not ever. And with that pleasure came the realization that it had been three years since I had been with anyone. Three long years, and here was someone. Here was someone and I needed them now.

I pushed him back on the bed and we continued, only this time my hand began to wander. His skin felt so warm, so soft, I needed this now. I reached the waistband and started to slip inside.

"Hey!" He had grabbed my wrist.

I sat up, still on top of him, "Why not?" I looked at him; was that not lust in his eyes, too?

"Not tonight." He started to roll me off of him, but I didn't budge.

"Why not?" He sat up on his elbows and smirked at me, "Do you not want to? I'd totally understand…"

"No, I want to," he laughed.

"Then why not?" I rolled off of him and scooted to my side of the bed.

"Do you want to?" he stood up and turned off the light before taking his place beside me.

"Yes, badly." He leaned back and I rested my head on his chest.

"Then we will."

I quickly sat up, "Tonight?"

He laughed for a second, "No." I sighed and nestled beside him again. "But soon."

"Good, cause time's running out."

"I know." His hand ran through my hair a few times, "Goodnight."

I looked up at him, "Kiss?" He smiled and his hand came up to pull my face towards his. A soft peck. "Goodnight." I wrapped my arm around him and smiled, the steady thuds of his heartbeat ushering me to sleep.

Audience Feedback/Participation Time! What did you think!? Inquiring minds want to know! Honesty is more than welcomed.