Disclaimer: This shit is getting boring. I can say shit right? This is an M rated story... there shouldn't be any kids in here. And if there are, they've read a lot more traumatic things than shit. Oh, what? No, I don't own iCarly.

A/N: Hey! It's another one! Booya! How lucky are you guys? And by guys, I mean girls. And guys. Ah, hell, this is the internet, you're all androgynous to me. I'll stick this up here, since I'm writing this now and screw going to the bottom of the page... YOU go to the bottom of the page. Communist.

Anyway, thanks to everyone who favourite-d... and is favourit-ing this story. It means more than words ever could. Oh wait... it doesn't? You should leave words then. Yeah. Seriously though, thanks to favourite-rs and reviewers. You have a special place in my heart (the bottom left chamber). It's 'sposed to be full of blood, but instead I have your sweet love.

It's probably not a good thing, health-wise. But thanks!

"I can't believe you!" I turned on Sam as we walked into the apartment.

She closed the door a little harder than necessary. "Me? I can't believe you're still talking about this!"

"Oh no, you're not putting this on me! You're the one who did something bad!" I glared at her.

Sam thrust her hands out at me, "I didn't even do anything!"

"Uh... should we go?" Said Spencer quietly in the background. I whirled around, Spencer and Freddie jumping at my sudden movement.

"No, no, you guys stay, since Sam didn't do anything." I spat, turning to face her again.

"I told you like a million times, I was trying to see what her shirt said."

I stalked up to Sam, jabbing her in the chest. "Yeah, I'll tell you what it said. It said 'Boobs'."

Sam sighed in exasperation. "I was not checking her out Carls."

I smiled bitterly, shrugging. "Oh no, no, your eyes just happened to be wherever she was."

Sam ran a hand through her hair, messing up the blonde curls. "Carly, this is stupid. I wasn't checking out that chick's boobs!"

I jab her in the chest triumphantly. "Hah! So you admit she had boobs!"

Sam looks confused. "What? Okay. Whatever, so her boobs were pretty big, okay. So what?"

I feel like steam is about to come shooting out of my ears. "So what? So what? So mine aren't enough for you anymore-"

"I think we should go." Whispered Spencer.

"Agreed."

I ignored Freddie and Spencer backing out the back door slowly, putting my hands to my breasts. "I mean... I know they're not so big but..." I said hesitantly, looking down at them, "But that doesn't give you the right to go ogling other girls right in front of me!"

I feel a swell of indignation burst through me, and I shove her shoulders lightly, sending her staggering back a few steps.

"Carls, I wasn't ogling her. I swear. This is so fucking stupid." I shove her again, and I see her hands come up defensively. Good. I want her mad. "Stop pushing me!"

I push her again, harder, and she stumbles. "C'mon Sam, fight back." I jeer. I can see her starting to get angry, her fists flexing.

"I'm not gonna fight you Carly."

I push her again, and her shoulders fight against me, pushing back. "What, I'm not good enough for you anymore Sam? You won't even fight me?"

Her fists are clenched now, her teeth gritted. "I don't wanna hurt you."

I snort. "Fuck you. Why don't you go find that big-boobed slut and-" My breath is knocked out of me as Sam shoves me up against the wall. I go to brush her hands off my shoulders and she grabs my wrists hard, pinning them above my head. "Fuck y-"

Her lips crush against mine, cutting me off mid-expletive. She breaks away from the hard kiss. "You're so fucking stupid Carls." She murmurs, her blue eyes glinting. She kisses me again, hard, and I force my tongue into her mouth, battling hers. She pulls away again, slightly breathless. "As if you'd ever be not enough."

I'm panting, still winded from my meeting with the wall, and I'm more turned on than I've ever been. I push my body forward, her hand chafing my wrists as I struggle. She smiles cruelly, a hand skimming over my breasts, brushing the hard nipples through the material. "They're small, but they'll do."

I thrust forward again, needing her touch, and she slams me back into the wall, her hips pushing into me. I moan, partly from pain and partly from pleasure. I can feel her watching me intently. Even now I feel safe with her. I'm not scared, 'cause I know Sam's in complete control. I know she'd never hurt me, no matter how mad she got. And if I told her to stop, she would, instantly. But my anger is fuelling my pleasure, my lust, and I want her rough, I want her to treat me like I'm not breakable, like I'm something she just wants to fuck and discard. I want it so bad.

Sam's hand tangles in my hair, grabbing hold roughly, and she pulls my face to hers, kissing me hard, practically shoving her tongue down my throat. She lets go of my wrists, moving her hand to my chest, fingers flicking over the hard nubs straining against the material of my shirt. I gasp into her mouth, but she keeps the kiss going, hand snaking up my shirt to touch me directly. My lungs feel like they're about to explode, but she's not letting me get a full breath, tweaking my nipple every time I get a sip of air and making it rush out again. I feel my knees start to tremble and she pulls back. I suck in a huge breath, spots appearing in front of my eyes. But she barely gives me a moment to recover before she's on me again, covering my neck with hot, hard kisses, nipping the skin with her sharp, little teeth. Moans are being ripped from my throat, urged out by her hot, wet mouth sucking on the tender flesh. I know she's making sure she leaves a mark, making the blood pool at the surface to show the world I'm hers. Her mouth releases me with a wet sound, the spot instantly cooling and throbbing. She moves her lips down further, dragging her tongue over my collarbone before following with her teeth, and I jerk as she bites down, nipping the flesh. And my chest is heaving as I struggle for breath, my muscles all weak and trembly from the flush of adrenalin and arousal pounding through my veins. Sam pulls back to survey her work, a little smirk on her face.

"Fuh- fuck... you." I manage to gasp, glaring at her half-heartedly.

Her grin grows wider. "Fuck me? Oh no Cupcake, fuck you." She says sweetly, her hand slipping up under my skirt. Her fingers rub over my panties, making my breath catch in my throat.

She shivers. "Christ Carls, you're so fucking wet." Sam pushes aside the damp material, her fingers moving to thrust inside me roughly, and my eyes roll back in my head from the rush of pleasure that sweeps through me.

"Unh, Sam..." I moan, pushing against her, my breath sobbing out. Her thrust pushes me back into the wall, her fingers curled inside me and I cry out, my hand gripping onto her shoulders tightly. "Oh fuck, Sam-"

She adds another finger, and I can feel the hot liquid gush from me, spilling over her hand. She lifts my leg, her hand sliding under my thigh, and I wrap it around her, groaning as she uses the leverage to thrust harder into me, moving my whole body against the wall. And these uncontrollable noises are escaping me, my head thrown back as Sam sucks on my neck, her teeth nipping the sensitive skin. I'm overwhelmed, by my arousal, by my growing pleasure, by Sam's force, by everything. It's an amazing feeling, and I've completely lost control to her. I feel it building, so intensely, and my hands tighten on her shoulders, my breath hitching. Sam stops for a moment and I groan, robbed of that pleasure. I look at her questioningly.

"I was not checking her out." Sam hisses in my ear, thrusting hard once into me. I cry out, shutting my eyes tight, and I can't stop my hips from bucking into her. Her tongue flicks out, running along the shell of my ear. "Got it?"

I can barely manage to nod, wanting her to start moving inside me again more than anything, so much it's crippling me. Sam smirks, sensing this, and she wiggles her fingers inside me, making me gasp. Sam can be a tease, but she's not cruel, so she starts up again, positioning her thumb so that it pushes against my clit on every stroke. I can't control my breath, only able to take little sips and gasps, the pleasure enhanced somehow, and building to an unbearable peak. I'm writhing against her, guttural moans being forced from me, and it's like a blow when I cum, and the breath is knocked out of me, a strangled cry escaping.

Sam pulls her fingers out of me, pulling me into an embrace, her lips nuzzling against the crook of my neck and shoulder. I can't even bring myself to wrap my arms around her, panting heavily, my muscles trembling and weak. And I finally understand the meaning of 'mindblowing', because I can't think, or speak, barely able to stand there, feeling a remnant of pleasure shiver through me when I move.

Sam shuffles me over to the couch, lying down and pulling me on top of her, hands rubbing my back. She sighs contently, dropping a light kiss on my forehead. I rest my head in the valley between her breasts, still struggling to form a coherent thought. "Y'know, I don't think we've ever fought like this before." She muses, her fingers raising goosebumps along my back as they caress lightly.

I swallow hard, lifting my heavy head. I manage a weak smile. "We should fight more often." I nod, "Mhmm. Definitely." I lower my head again, sighing into her soft breast, inhaling her warm Sam smell.

Sam smiles lopsidedly. "Her boobs were awesome though."

I growl, and Sam lifts my face, kissing me teasingly. "Kidding Carls!" Her face turns serious. "There's only ever been you. Always. It'll always be you."

I feel a smile break out across my face, and I can't contain it. "Promise?"

Sam nods confidently. I sigh, snuggling back into her. "I love it when we fight."

A/N: This chapter seems pretty OOC to me, but it's just so goddamn hot in my brain I couldn't help it. I hope you don't mind. But they're more in character at the end. Also, it's occurred to me that maybe Carly was picking a fight on purpose. I'm not sure, she doesn't tell me everything. But anyway, anyone who believes in the Cam relationship is a master of finding subtext, so... interpret it in here if it makes more sense that way.

And to the people who proposed to me... how dare you!

I waited at that altar for three days, living off communion wafers and hastily purchased wedding cake and for what? For you to never show up! Sure, maybe I should've 'told' you when it was, or 'communicated' with you at all, or 'understood' it was a joke, but damnit! I am a woman of quality! A polygamous woman of QUALITY!

The only thing I took away from our wedding/s was heartbreak. Heartbreak and this chalice thing I found.

Ahhh. I like living in my crazy fantasies. They're so... blasphemous.

Huh. Internet's not really the best place for this. Eh, screw this, I'm too lazy to backspace. Yet energetic enough to keep typing? Oh. I'm still going... shi-