A/N: Update time! Happy early Halloween!

"And the teacher told me if I keep practicing, I can be in the recital and be one of the flowers and not the bumblebees because I'm a really good dance. I told her I will but that I'm going home with mommy in a couple of days so I will practice there and maybe she can see me dance on the computer camera…"

"Sweetheart," John bent to grasp Alanna's arms and smiled. "Can you please go up to your room so Daddy and I can cook dinner and talk for a little bit?"

"About what?" Alanna cocked her head to the side, an eyebrow raised.

"Grown up stuff that doesn't concern you," replied John sternly. "Please go. We'll call you down when dinner is ready."

Alanna sighed loudly. "Fine,"

John watched as Alanna trudged up the stairs slowly, ensuring she had reached the second landing before turning his gaze back to Randy. The younger man tried to smother a smile from where he stood over at the far side of the counter, chopping vegetables. "I was wondering how long it would take you to send her to her room. If I hear that flowers and bumblebee dance story one more time myself…"

"That's not why I asked her to leave, Ran," responded John. Randy frowned at the coldness of his tone and lowered the knife to the counter surface. He turned over to face John and crossed his arms over his chest. "So why did you?"

John shook his head at him. "Like you don't know,"

Randy rolled his eyes. "I don't. I can't read your mind, Cena."

"You mean the mind you fucked with earlier today in the park?" John turned away and began to pace the area around the kitchen. "You put all these unnecessary thoughts in my head, Ran. All I can do is stress about them now! Are you happy to finally be turning me into paranoid nutcase like you?"

Randy narrowed his eyes. "Thanks for the compliment, asshole."

"Randy, you know what I mean," replied John sternly. "There's no point to all of this stressing out you're doing over 'what-if's'. You're driving yourself crazy and it's your own fault. I don't want to become you. I refuse to play that game with you and I'm getting tired of having to talk you out of all these crazy ideas because that's exactly what they are, Ran; crazy ideas!"

Randy stared at John intently, his eyes cold. "So, when you tell me you want me share everything with you, you really only mean you want me to share the good stuff. If I have doubts or concerns, I'm supposed to keep them to myself because they're not valid. I'm just a paranoid nutcase, right?"

John sighed loudly. "I should've known you were gonna turn this into some big ass dramatic fight,"

"Well, what the fuck am I supposed to think, Cena!" Randy's voice rose to a yell, the sound echoing around the room. "I'm telling you what I feel; what I fucking believe and you're just dismissing me,"

"I'm not dismissing you! I'm trying to convince you that nothing is wrong and that nothing is going to happen but you keep harping on it so much that it's like you want something to happen!"John's voice rose to compete with Randy's. "Is that what this is really all about? Are you having doubts about us and you're just using all these theories of yours as an excuse to divorce?"

Randy's mouth slowly dropped open and he shook his head. "Wow, and you call me a paranoid nutcase. I can't believe it." he held up his hand when John started to answer. "Don't! Don't even bother any more. If I haven't convinced you by now that I'm serious about working out our relationship then I never will. I really don't know what it's gonna take for you to be convinced, though. I'm going to therapy with you and going over every fucking mistake I've ever made despite how much I hate to think about the person I was and I'm doing it for you; for us. I've told you a million times how sorry I am for sleeping with Cody despite the fact that anyone else would've already told you to get over it; that it wasn't his fault because he had been drugged. I didn't care; I told you, immediately after it happened and I have apologized for it. I've told you I've forgiven you for Dwayne and I've proven it...in a lot of different ways, number one being by getting back in bed with you. I don't know what else I can do, John."

John remained silent, his gaze moving downward. "I'm just sick of it, Ran. I get that you have to share your concerns but…I just don't want to hear them."

Randy shrugged and turned away. "Fine, John. You won't," He walked out of the kitchen, abandoning his dinner preparations, and headed for the stairs.

John quickly followed and reached Randy just as he started the climb up. He grasped his arm and pulled him back, ignoring the daggers Randy threw at him with his eyes. "Wait, Ran, that came out wrong…"

"This whole conversation has been 'wrong', John and I don't want to continue it. I'm too close to saying something…" Randy pulled his hand back and sighed. "I'm too exhausted. Fighting with you has always been the most difficult thing I've had to do and I don't want to do it anymore. Just forget it,"

"No, I won't forget it," replied John sternly. He maintained his grip on Randy's arm even as the younger man tried to pull away. "When I say I don't want to hear your concerns it's because I'm scared of them, Ran. I don't want to hear them because I'm afraid that they may be right. I mean, as crazy as it would be that these men have nothing better to do than to fuck with our lives…I don't want to think of it. I don't want to think of anything that can ruin us again."

"You're ruining us, John," responded Randy, his voice barely a whisper.

John inhaled sharply at Randy's statement and dropped his hand, letting the younger man go. Randy stared at him sadly for a few seconds before turning away and walking up the stairs.

"The food from the diner was good, Daddy but I like your food better."

Randy smiled as he wrapped the covers around Alanna snugly. "Thanks, sweetheart. I'll make you some of my dinner tomorrow. I just didn't feel up to it earlier,"

"Does your head still hurt, Daddy?" Alanna frowned up in concern at him.

"Just a little bit but I'll be fine, baby. Don't worry about me," Randy bent and kissed Alanna's head before standing. "Sleep tight,"

Alanna smiled at him as he walked out of the room. Randy closed the door behind him, leaving it slightly ajar. He walked down to his bedroom slowly, his head indeed pounding despite telling Alanna the pain had lessened.

As he walked into his and John's bedroom, his eyes landed on John grabbing a pillow off their bed. He ignored the older man and headed directly into the bathroom. As he searched the cabinet for some Tylenol and quickly gulped them down, he heard John moving around the room. While the temptation to spend the night in the bathroom and continue ignoring John was great, the pain in his head made Randy head back for the bathroom door. His eyes remained trained on the floor but he notice John had also moved one of the blankets off the bed and was now digging in his drawers. Randy moved towards the half empty bed and threw his weary body onto it, pulling the remaining blanket over his body and covering his head. He closed his eyes and was willing the medicine to make his headache disappear when he felt a hand land on his shoulder. Randy quickly jerked away and lowered the blanket from his face, his eyes widened in surprise.

John stared at him, a somewhat guilty expression on his face as he kneeled by the side of the bed. He quickly moved his hands away and held them up. "I just wanted to let you know I'm gonna sleep in the other room. I figure its best we don't keep talking tonight since you obviously don't seem to be in the mood and I'm tired of fighting myself. Tomorrow maybe we can keep talking…"

"Whatever, John, I don't care. Just let me sleep. My head is killing me," mumbled Randy in response, his eyes drifting shut.

"Do you want me to do something for you?" asked John cautiously. "I can get you some medicine or bring you a cup of coffee. The caffeine is supposed to help with headaches,"

"I don't want anything but the lights off and some quiet, John," replied Randy, his eyes opening. His annoyance at John slowly faded when he saw the concern in his eyes. "I'll be fine. I need some sleep."

John nodded, still concerned. "I know. Today was intense,"

"Understatement of the year, Cena," Randy rolled his eyes but his lips twitched in the beginning of a grin.

John smiled and lowered his eyes. "I hate going to bed without talking about this, Ran."

Randy's amusement faded and he shook his head. "Well, that's too bad because I can't talk about this anymore. I'm exhausted, John…and I don't mean physically."

"I told you why I flipped out. I'm scared to think of all the things you're concerned about, Ran. I don't want to think of anyone hurting us…" began John but he was quickly interrupted by Randy. "So you choose to call me crazy and tell me to keep all of my concerns bottled up and you don't realize that by acting like that you're the one hurting us! You're hurting me, at least."

"I didn't mean to. I was just so irritated…when you get on a kick about something you just don't stop and I couldn't hear it anymore and I exploded!" John stood from the side of the bed and began to pace, his hands moving up to run over his head. "You know how I get, Ran! You get the exact same way; pissed off as hell."

"I know but you went too far, though. To ask me if I'm trying to use it as an excuse for divorce…" Randy turned over in the bed, his eyes locked onto the bedroom ceiling. "I mean, thinking it is bad enough, John but actually asking me…" He stopped and lifted a hand to cover his eyes, his head resuming its pound.

"I know I went too far and I'm sorry but…" John sighed loudly, drawing Randy's stare over to him. "It's how I felt for a minute there, Randy and I don't want to lie to you. I had to ask."

Randy pushed away the pain and slid up in the bed. He shrugged and shook his head at John. "So, if this gonna be an everyday fear of yours now? If I complain about something or worry about something or if I get on another kick about something 5 years from now, too, are you gonna flip out and think I'm asking for a divorce?"

"I'm still scared for us, Randy. We're not where we were. A few months ago there was nothing you could've done that would've made me fear you were drifting away and thinking of anything but us being together for the rest of our lives. Things are different now." John walked over to the side of the bed and lowered himself down. "We both made huge mistakes and it's gonna take us a long time to get back to that place. The wait is nerve-wracking, though…it's fucking killing me."

"So, you're just gonna continue to imagine the worst? Wow, and you call me a paranoid nutcase," replied Randy with a smirk.

John smiled. "I'm sorry, Ran. I feel like I've apologized to you more the past couple months than I have the entire decade I've known you."

"Then stop doing shit to be sorry for," responded Randy, narrowing his eyes. "I was wrong. Right now the biggest obstacle to us being together is you and your attitude towards me, not Brock, Cody or Dwayne. I can't be with you if you want me to change who I am and to hide my feelings in front of you. I can't be all rainbows and butterflies."

John remained silent, his smile fading and his eyes drifting down.

"Is that what you want, John?" pressed Randy, raising an eyebrow. "You asked me if I was looking for an out but you're acting…"

"I don't want a way out!" interrupted John, already knowing what Randy was going to ask. "That's the last thing I want! Why do you think I was so worried about you and the way you're acting?"

"I don't want a way out, either, John! I've told you that! I've made it clear I don't want anyone but you and aren't my concerns over Brock, Cody and Dwayne enough to prove it to you? The reason I'm so worried about them is because I don't want anything to break us up. Why would I care about that if I wanted a way out of our marriage, John?" Randy kept his eyebrow raised and watched as John's eyes darkened.

"All I can say is that I am sorry, Randy. We both have tempers but I let mine get the best of me." John shrugged. "I can't do any more. Just ask that you forgive me and continue trying to get over all of my own issues."

"I told you a couple weeks ago, I don't want us to fight so much that this relationship turns into something exhausting. I told you I didn't want any more apologies, John. I want there to be no fights so the apologies don't have to follow." Randy crossed his arms over his chest, not ready to give in to John's apology just yet.

"I know…" John sighed. "I know you hate hearing it." He moved up to the edge of the bed beside where Randy lay and reached for the younger man's hand before he had a chance to move it away. "I promise to do better but can you promise me to calm down a little about those 3 assholes? I told you I wouldn't let anyone hurt us again and I intend to keep that promise. Please try to not worry so much because even if they do want to fuck with us, Ran, I don't care. Nothing will separate me from you again so let them try."

Randy looked down at John's hand covering his own and he slowly nodded. "Fine, I'll try to relax a little but if I have something worrying me, I'm gonna speak it. I'm not gonna lie to you and pretend everything is ok and become some kind of Stepford husband…no matter how much you want one."

John laughed and shook his head. "If I wanted some guy to bow down to my every command, never question me and be a robot with no mind of his own, I would've never gone after you, Orton. I love you; all of you and that includes your crazy lizard brain."

Randy's lips finally curved into a smile. "My lizard brain?"

"Yeah," replied John, a smile on his own lips. He lifted Randy's hand to his lips and kissed it gently before letting it drop back to the bed. He stared into Randy's eyes with a hopeful expression and mumbled, "I'd better go to my own room now…"

Randy nodded and leaned back onto his pillows. "Yeah, that sounds like a good idea."

John's face dropped, a disappointed look overtaking it. "Oh uh…ok. I'll see you tomorrow morning then…"

Randy nodded once more and watched as John began a devastated trudge towards the door, carrying his pillow and blanket. He waited until John was halfway out the door before sitting back up and calling out, "Cena, get your ass back in here!"

John turned over, his eyes widening. "What?"

Randy smiled and patted the side of the bed. "Get your ass back in here…now."

John quickly let the bedroom door close and he hurried back to the bed, climbing in beside Randy and immediately drawing him into his arms. He groaned and grabbed Randy's face in his hands, pulling his face towards him, their lips joining, warm and soft. He slipped his tongue inside Randy's mouth slowly, feeling the younger man start to kiss back. Randy pressed up against him, throwing his arms around John's neck and allowing their tongues to caress. He moved his hands down John's body and stroked his strong back gently. John ran his hands up, running them through Randy's short hair, their tongues intertwined, then slid his hands down Randy's back to enjoy the feel of his toned back muscles. The men pulled away breathlessly and Randy was the first to speak.

"You're seriously gonna make me kick your ass one day, Cena."

John leaned in close, his lips touching Randy's in a gentle kiss. The kiss became deeper and more passionate. His tongue snaked its way into Randy's mouth and he gave no resistance. John kissed him over and over, holding him closer and swallowing Randy's low moan until he finally pulled away. "As long as you're with me, I don't care what you're doing to me."

A/N: Review!