This is going to be edited, later, a lot. I rushed this thing out. It will probably be reposted again before Monday
On his way to the elevator, James Wilson collapsed and began seizing. James Potter looked at House for a split second before he took off.
At a run, James leapt over the railing down to the first floor and landed fairly close to Wilson. Deciding to make a resolution to use only staircases and elevators for at least a week, James ignored the pain in his knees and knelt beside the doctor. The man was unconscious and limp. There was blood under his head, and running down his chin. He must have bit his tongue while thrashing about.
Wilson was taken to a room and stabilized. James got a call. When he looked at the phone, the caller ID said 'NCIS Gibbs'. James let out an, "Uhhhhhh," and denied the call. He would deal with them later.
James followed Doctor Wilson to his room and listened as Cuddy and House examined the unconscious doctor. "House, you are not on this case. You," Cuddy said to James, "what's your name?"
"Doctor James Potter."
"You'll be the lead on this case. House, do you understand that?"
The stubble faced man stared at her for a moment. He turned on his good leg and made his way out of the room, leaning on the cane more heavily than he usually did.
-____________-
In the NCIS building, dizzy from apparating and time travelling once again, James strolled across the room and sat at Gibbs' desk. According to the universal time-line, Gibbs had just called his phone, and James had just denied the call. Bored, he grabbed the stapler and pencil sharpener and waited for the team to exit the elevator.
When they did make it to the bullpen, James was firing staples across the room, like a staple gun.
"What the hell did you do to my stapler?" Gibbs asked.
"I improved it. Now it's lethal."
"It was lethal before. As a club."
James stared at the grey haired man. "Wow, mine was way more inventive."
"Get out of my chair, Potter," ordered Gibbs. James stood up and moved to the desk he had been assigned. Gibbs' phone rang and he answered it abruptly. "Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Yeah." He set the phone down with a snap. "Gear up. You too, Potter."
They followed Gibbs down to the car and got in. "Have you ever seen a dead body before?" Tony asked. James stared at him.
"Are you kidding?" James asked in a monotone. He refused to believe someone had posed that question to him.
"Not really, no," Tony answered, suddenly unsure. James continued to stare at him as McGee took a corner in a startlingly sharp manner. He was generally as conscientious driver.
"I paid for a two-thousand-seven Ford pick-up in cash over a year ago. It was fully funded by me lugging corpses for a coroner when I was nine. I performed my first autopsy on a person when I was seven. Yes, Agent DiNozzo, I've seen dead people."
"Well, now you get to see three of them," Gibbs said. "One Marine Captain and his two sons were stabbed to death in a motel room. Potter is taking point on this one."
Tony's jaw dropped and he looked betrayed. "Boss, I have seniority-"
"I said Potter will take point." The car stopped and they climbed out into the biting cold. "Well boss?" Gibbs asked him.
"What month is it? I need to get out more," James muttered. "What are you waiting for; the suspect to walk up with a neon sign? Tony," James said sweetly, "you can sketch the scene."
Tony did not look like a happy camper. When the rest of the team was out of the area, Tony walked up to James and grabbed his shoulder.
"Potter, I have dirt on you worse than I have on Ziva," Tony said. James laughed outright.
"What are you going to say? 'I was kidnapped by a crazed wizard who took me back in time'?" James said. He laughed again and walked away, shaking his head. "Good luck with that."
A few minutes later, James saw Tony sketching the perimeter and he smirked.
He entered the bathroom and saw the body of the Marine Captain. He looked to be in his mid-forties, and had salt-and-pepper hair and a face that had gone unshaven for a few days.
The medical examiner, Donald "Ducky" Mallard, arrived and set to work. "He passed six hours and forty seven minutes ago," James said. Ducky looked up at him, and James saw a glint of curiosity in his eyes, behind his glasses. James raised an eyebrow at him. "You can check, if you like."
"Young people," Ducky muttered. He turned to look at the face of the deceased. "No respect for age."
"Age only matters when it comes to wine," James said easily. "I have spent fourteen years of my life learning of death. It is vastly more interesting than learning of life. And I can tell you that this man passed six hours and forty eight minutes ago."
Gibbs walked in as Ducky took a liver temperature. "Time of death, Doctor?" he asked.
Ducky glanced at James for a split second before he looked at Gibbs and said, "Just less than seven hours ago, Jethro." James internally smirked at his triumph. "I would very much like to get him to autopsy. James, I have already cleared the other two bodies. Could you assist in moving them?"
James assented and before long he and Jimmy Palmer. "Your name isn't James, is it?" James asked.
"Yes, it is," Jimmy said brightly. James sighed. He was going to have to come up with a different name for himself.
-____________-
Back in Seattle, James was attempting to stop Wilson's second seizure. When the tremors passed, James exhaled sharply. He walked back to the differential diagnosis room and found the House's team there. The debated for several hours, before most of them went home to change clothes at least.
Lisa Cuddy, Dean of Medicine at Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital, stood and stared at two of the most well respected doctors in the hospital at that moment. She stood next to Allison Cameron, Senior Attending Physician of the Emergency Room, who also gaped in shock.
They stared as James Potter and Gregory House attacked each other with dry-erase markers. James held a black marker, and House had several long black streaks across his face and clothing. House held a red marker, and James possessed many red colored streaks of the same nature.
When Cuddy regained herself, she opened the door and stepped through. "What is going on?"
The two men stopped and stared at her. "Going over possible ailments," James said. Cuddy nodded in utter confusion.
"Yes. As I was saying, he could have a pain in his eye." House slashed the pen over James' eye.
"Or his arm." James plunged the tip of the marker into the nerve under Houses' arm. House grimaced in discomfort."
"Or his ribs," House jammed the marker between two of the Ribs on James' left side, and James was sure he felt it poke his kidney.
"Or his-"
Cuddy decided to intervene, and she grabbed the markers away from them. She pointed them at threateningly. "No more markers," she said. They nodded at her and backed up a bit. She turned to leave.
"She always this scary?" James muttered to House.
"She's scarier when she's off her meds," House replied. Cuddy whirled around.
"House!"
-____________-
James stood in the autopsy room with Ducky and Jimmy. They stood over the youngest son of Captain Antony O'Brien, Lenny. He was thirteen, and he had been stabbed six times.
"Which one was the fatal slash, however?" Ducky asked. Jimmy looked over the body intently.
"The stab to the heart," he answered.
"Lung," James said. "These stabbings weren't rapid. The stab to the lung occurred some several minutes before that to the heart."
"He's right, Jimmy," Ducky said. "James, could you take this evidence to Abby?"
James took the hair samples and went to Abby's lab. He stared, however, when he saw the massive build up of energy drink cans. "Should I trust you with this?" he asked. She spun around and looked at him.
"What? No, these aren't mine. They were found at the crime scene." James nodded without conviction and set the small plastic jars down. Abby took them, paranoidishly checking to make sure all evidence protocols had been followed.
"I'll go then," James said.
"Wait!" Abby exclaimed as he was almost out the door. "How strong are you?"
-____________-
Finding that all of the markers had been taken, James and House resorted to a glaring match. "You are holding out," James accused. House tilted his head without breaking eye contact.
"I've told you everything."
"Have not," James said. "I need to know everything about this man you can tell me."
"I will not do it. That would make your life easy."
James stared at him for several seconds. Without hesitation, James grabbed the older doctor's cane and walked from the room. "Hey! Give that back!" House yelled.
"No! That would make your life easy!" James replied.
He walked to the main nurse's station twirling the cane in his right hand. He stopped and gave the head nurse a charming, disarming smile. "Hello," James said. "Could you do me a favor? Take this cane and hide it?"
She smiled at him. "This belongs to House?" James nodded. Her smile widened and she took the cane. "I would be happy to."
"You are a wonderful person," said James.
After hiding the cane, James continued to search out the team. Eric Foreman was in the lab, and he was sure he could find Taub there as well. The whereabouts of Thirteen and Kutner remained a mystery.
He walked into the lab to find Foreman looking into a high power microscope. The doctor looked up as James walked in. "I've found something."
-____________-
James walked into the blessedly empty Great Hall, only to hear the lunch bell ring a moment later. He swore violently and hoped to be gone before too many students appeared.
Andron foiled his plans, however. Andron, who as it would turn out, was a liar liar pants on fire.
Searching for a file in their shared living quarters, James heard the telltale tone of Andron's mother calling her son. With no Andron to answer, James did so in his stead.
"James?" she asked when she heard his voice. "What are you doing in Iraq?"
It took James a moment to respond, but when he did, it was only to say, "What?"
Floating in a near palpable cloud of glee, James walked over to Andron, who was busy eating lunch. He cuffed the corn-rowed head and laugh as Andron jumped.
"You told your mother you joined the Marines?" James asked. Andron's eyes widened as he stood up and swung around to face James.
"Perhaps." The fact that the usually deep voice cracked made James laughed. He walked down the table to leave, but he could not stop laughing.
"Oh, please. Can I give the eulogy?"
"Shit! You didn't tell her, did you?" demanded Andron.
"Well, when I answered your phone, she was a little confused as to why I was in a War Zone," said James. He laughed again and continued walking.
"I'm going to be murdered."
"What I want to know is why," James said.
"My mother gets hatred of Britain from my father, who got it from his father, who was shot thirteen times by a Brit during the War. I can't very well tell her I'm helping the fuckers!" Andron said, pacing.
Two angry looking people walked into the hall as James was about to exit. When they saw him, they raised their wands. He vaguely recognized them as friends of his brother. James felt her should know their names. He searched his mind and came up with them; Ron and Hermione.
"This isn't very friendly," James said. "And you can bet my reaction is about to be equally so."
"Where's Sirius?" the girl demanded.
"Jacking off? Girl, I don't know. Let me by." They held their ground firmly.
"Where is our friend?" Ron demanded.
"I can't bring myself to care," James said. "I have a sick Oncologist in Seattle, a dead Marine and his two dead sons in DC, and a man with failing kidneys in New York. If you don't mind, I have to go diagnose a stubborn disease, get a child killer off the street, and donate a kidney. Good day." James pushed passed the two students.
Andron collapsed onto his back in the middle of the hall and let out a growl. "I'm too pretty to die," he muttered.
-____________-
James sat in a chair next to Drake's hospital bed. Drake himself was on oxygen and looked half-dead. James shook his head and held the older man's hand in his own.
"You know, Drake, this here is two thousand eight. Not nineteen seventy-three. Now you need things like a search warrant to enter someone's home. Or, at least knock. The man that shot you, well, he was defending himself."
Drake opened an eye and stared at James. He rasped something, but James couldn't understand him. The old man tried again, and made his words clearer. "He was… a rapist."
James smiled. "Hey, I'm not saying I don't understand why you did what you did. Just that you could have done it better. However, things work out in the end. At least now you found out you had a kidney problem."
"Now I'm stealing one of yours," Drake said. James laughed and laid his free hand on Drake's shoulder.
"Freely given, my friend. It is honestly the least I could do; after all you've helped me, it's only fair. Besides, the doctor said I could have one of your kidneys," James said. Drake laughed and squeezed James' hand.
James walked himself into the operating room, fully dressed, and turned to the surgeon. "Ready?" James asked. The surgeon, and long time acquaintance of James', nodded. He sat down in a chair and took out a cup of coffee. James sat on the operating table amidst shocked stares from the rest of the surgical team, and took off his shirt.
James picked up a scalpel, and proceeded to take out his own kidney. The surgical team was too stunned to move.
-____________-
James walked into the Great Hall, and for the first time, he planned for it to be in the middle of dinner. Andron looked at him as he entered, and dropped his fork.
"Dude! You're covered in blood!" Andron yelled. The staff and students went quiet to look at James. James himself noticed that his brother was sitting between his two friends at the Gryffindor table.
"I know. I had fun."
"That was very Hannibal Lecter," Andron mentioned. "Now, this might seem off topic, but… Why are you covered in blood?"
"I removed my kidney," James said. He did a short victory dance.
"You removed your own kidney?" Andron asked. "You're supposed to be sedated for that, you know."
"I set a hospital record for fastest removal of an internal organ."
Andron was silent for several seconds. "Can I see?" James lifted his shirt and Andron's jaw dropped. "You stapled yourself?"
"Of course. I was in a hurry, you know. After I took the damn thing out, I put it in Drake."
"You are one crazy son of a bitch. Then again, I did see you cut an man's head open and poke his brain."
"Guess what I got?" James said.
"Abdominal pain?"
"Funny. No. I've got a jar of kidney!" James waved his hand and in it appeared a clear jar holding an organ suspended in fluid.
"I'm jealous!" Andron complained. James waved his other hand and another jar appeared.
"I got you one too!"
"What potion uses human kidneys?" Severus Snape asked coldly.
James and Andron looked at each other and both answered, "Potion? I'm thinking… bookends!"
Everyone seemed to be confused as to what I meant when I said there were three James's. I meant
James Potter
Harry "James" Potter
James Wilson
Now we have James Palmer.