Labyrinthine Chapter Twenty One

Anne moved the brush absently through her long hair as she prepared for bed, mind heavy with the weight that Gilbert had bestowed upon her two nights ago. When she had asked for time to think, he had said that she could have as much as she needed, but there was an impatience in his eyes that made her feel a pang of guilt. Whenever their eyes met after that night, she could see a plea in his hazel eyes; a look that reminded her that they were running out of time. It vanished within a moment, leaving a careful smile behind, but it put a strange pressure on her.

She had never had to make such a life-altering decision before.

At first, Anne was sure Winona would decline the offer that Gilbert was placing before her; but after raking her brains over the subject for two days, she secretly agreed that it was the best they could do. They were offering Winona a chance to have a steady future where she would be able to take care of herself and her child. She had chosen to marry Gilbert for similar reasons and Anne was sure she would accept the opportunity reluctantly, but surely.

The question that haunted her was- would she be able to take care of Nora?

She knew that she should have agreed to this arrangement immediately and wholeheartedly. Hadn't Winona taken care of James so selflessly for a year? But there was a tiny fragment of doubt that she couldn't shake off even though she was ashamed of it. Taking care of Nora was going to complicate things even further. What would they say to the society about their arrangement? How were they going to explain her reappearance? Would anyone even believe the truth if they told? Gilbert's practice was so well here that she didn't want to ask him to go back to Avonlea. And even if they did move there, they needed an explanation about the presence of Nora.

She set the brush down and sat down on the vanity chair, staring at her own reflection. Everything was so tangled that she couldn't think of anything that might solve it all. She wished she could just transport herself back to her old life, where she was certain of having a future with Gilbert. Sadly, that wasn't how life worked. She wasn't going to disappear, she had to fight her way through it all.

Gilbert's face was so grave when he came home in the evening that Winona felt a shiver go down her spine. She was sitting on her favourite spot on the stairs with Nora on her lap and her heart beat furiously as he made his way towards her from the buggy. It was a beautiful windy evening, but everything felt still when she looked up at Gilbert's tired face.

She gulped.

"What is it?"

Gilbert ran a hand through his hair and looked at her with uncertainty.

"We are doing everything we can, trust me." He said. "But I cannot lie to you, Winona- he doesn't seem to have much time left."

Winona shuddered violently and Gilbert bent down to swiftly take the sleeping Nora from her arms. She put a quivering hand over her mouth.

"Oh my God." She whispered.

"If you really wish to, you can come to see him tomorrow morning." He said cautiously, cradling Nora gently in his arms.

Winona merely nodded as she felt the hotness of tears against her cold cheek.

"I'll take her inside." Gilbert muttered and walked through the front door, leaving her gratefully alone. She wiped the tears away with her handkerchief, her mind filled with a surprisingly strong pain.

She hadn't had any fatherly relations with him for half of her life and he had never done anything for her. Yet the possibility of him dying shook her. He was the only attachment left for her- with everyone else gone. Her mother had left her followed by Alex. When she had tried to find a sense of security with Gilbert, he was about to leave her too. Apart from Nora, her father was the only person who was bound to be related to her, no matter how much he tried to run away. She realized that even after all this time, she hadn't completely given up on the possibility that he might repent his actions and come back to her.

Winona had faced heartbreak over and over again, but she had never stopped fighting for the people she cared for. She kept giving chances to Alex in the past and hoped that one day her father would realize his many mistakes. It was one of the many things about herself she couldn't change- this was a part of her.

Her Grandmother had once told her that happiness and pain come revolve in a human's life like cycles and not one lasts forever. She had made it through the tough days by believing precisely that. But now as she felt every single person she loved slip away from her, she found it difficult to believe that the wheel would turn ever again.

Leslie had never thought she would hear from him again.

Well, that wasn't exactly true, she admitted in defeat. She had made several trips to the post office with a beating heart, wondering if she would receive a letter bearing his name, even though she never admitted it even to herself. Before she had found out about George Moore, she had a reason to forget him and to let herself stop from thinking about him. But ever since she had found her newfound freedom, she had lost herself often into the daydreams of him and a possible life with him.

But when the postmaster had finally handed her a letter with his terrible handwriting on top, she hadn't imagined it to be the bearer of a shocking news entirely unrelated to the feelings that had blossomed between them during the past summer.

She had read the letter three times before she dared to believe its contents.

Apparently some doctor in Bolingbroke had purposefully kept Gilbert in the dark, hiding from him the fact that his wife was alive for one year. Owen had asked her if she could talk to him about this because he didn't even know whether Gilbert had learned the truth about Anne yet. He simply thought it would be wiser to let him know about what he had found before taking any actions. He had said that he was to stay in Bolingbroke until she replied.

Leslie scanned the letter once again and despite the confusion that she the letter had left her in, she felt disappointed. There was nothing in the letter about his feelings or about the unnamed bond that they had shared. It seemed like a bland, plain, enquiry letter that you would send to an acquaintance.

Perhaps he was caught up in confusion about the whole Gilbert-Anne situation. She tried to pacify herself.

Also he had mentioned that he was waiting for her reply so that he could pay his promised visit to Four Winds. He had finished his manuscript and couldn't wait to show it to Captain Jim.

She sighed and put the letter away. She believed things would be clearer once she spoke to him in person and she would be free to begin a new life. If he didn't want to be with her the way she did, she had the forms that she needed to fill up for the nursing course she was planning to take.

And if he did feel the same- no, she didn't dare hope.

With a sudden wave of determination she decided to make this uncertainty end as soon as possible. It wasn't that dark yet and she could still pay a visit to her neighbors.

When evening came, James was jumping around the garden, talking to himself as he brandished a long twig in the air like a sword. Anne pressed her forehead against the cool glass of the spare room window, watching his enthusiasm with a small smile. Oh, how much she had missed seeing him like this! It was truly a bliss to watch children when they were in their own element, free from restrictions and fear of embarrassment. No decisions to make and no consequences to care about.

"James!"

Anne turned her head to see Winona standing on the porch, hands on hips, looking at the little boy. She was dressed in a simple powder blue gown and had an apron tied around her waist. Though she looked normal, the exhaustion and worry was inevitably showing on her pale face.

"Coming!" James cheered and ran towards her after dropping the twig on the grass. Winona crouched down as he approached her and shook her head exasperatedly at the state of his clothing.

"Look at the mud stains!" she cried, annoyed and pulled him close to examine the stains more closely. "Did you roll around in the grass?"

"The enemies were throwing blasts at me so I had to hide!" he explained.

"I must ask Gilbert not to tell you any war stories." Winona muttered. "Come, let's wash your shirt before the stains set!"

"But I want to play some more!" James exclaimed and stomped one foot.

Winona tilted her head to one side.

"It's getting dark, dear." She said.

"Soldiers shouldn't be afraid of the dark." He said proudly. "Dad has told me."

"But you're still a tiny soldier, aren't you?" she pleaded. "I'll help you find something else that you could wear tomorrow and then you can play as long as you want to. Let's go find something that we wouldn't mind throwing away."

Anne looked at them, mesmerized as Winona gently nudged him inside the house, talking to him softly all the while. There was something between them that made her heart clench, something that was far beyond jealousy. Something that she could not put into words.

There was love, care and an undeniable bond.

The simple exchange was nothing out of ordinary. She could easily remember several occasions back in Avonlea when she had easily engaged in simple conversations like this with James. But that was what struck her the most- the normalcy between them. All along she had assumed that James had grown close to Winona as a habit or due to her absence. But it was much more than that.

Winona loved him.

Her vision blurred and she hastily wiped the tears away. She realized that Winona had given everything to her son in her absence and she had only been selfish in return.

In the heat of the moment, she left the room swiftly and walked out to knock on the door of Gilbert's office.

"Come in." he said in a cool business-like tone, probably expecting the visit from a patient.

When Anne pushed the door open, she saw him sitting behind his desk, carefully examining a patient's file while taking notes. He looked up at her and paused, surprised at her abrupt entry and rattled by her reddened cheeks and sobs.

"Anne-girl?" he said softly, his voice concerned. "What's the matter? Are you-"

"I'll do it." She said in a quivering voice. "I'll take care of her."

"What?" he asked, confused.

"Nora." She said. "I'm ready to do it."

Gilbert walked towards her in a daze and pulled her close for a passionate kiss.

"I knew you'd understand." He said proudly.

Lost in each other's embrace, they never noticed that through the opened door Winona had listened to their conversation without context and had already assumed the worst.

That they were planning to take Nora by brushing her aside conveniently.

And it was the one thing she could never bear.

Author's Note:-

Hello everyone! Sorry I kept you waiting for so long!

We are rapidly nearing the end of the story and soon all the confusion would be clear, I promise.

Keep sending love through follows, favourites and reviews! They really help me keep going through the tough days when I don't feel like writing everything!

Love,

Ashwini.