A/N: Foob.

I'm not even going to ask… :/

On other notes, we're late. I'M SORRY I'VE HAD AN EXCUSE I DON'T KNOW ABOUT FIELD but I have one. I've had the driving portion of driver's ed. Which is short, but freakishly stressful. My thoughts the whole time: I'M ABOUT TO DIE I'M ABOUT TO DIE I'M ABOUT TO DIE I'M ABOUT TO DIE HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT I'M ABOUT TO - I think you get it.

Also, on a less humorous note, my gramma died (WHY DID YOU NOT TELL ME THIS I'M SO SORRY AAAAAHHHH! I have no idea what to say!). This Tuesday, actually.

*mumbles* that's what I get for making the decision to kill Cody's dad...

The driving wasn't THAT bad… And yeah, I have an excuse too. Namely: 3 projects simultaneously, a multitude of tests and quizzes, a math competition, a math test for an application school, uncompleted homeworks and extra credits (because my grades suck), and other whatnot. Not as important as Sera's excuse, but still an excuse nonetheless.

But we're just late. Latelatelazylate...

We're doing our best to focus and bring you the next chapter :P

Chapter 20: Dilemmas

Sweet laughter rang out as Jasmine ran outside for the first time in a few days. Kiku smiled as he followed from a safe distance.

The confinement had been very tedious; having nothing to do because they couldn't leave the barracks, not even to work, the Japanese of Kiku's building had to find other ways of occupying themselves.

An older man, a certain Mr. Yamamoto, had gathered up all the children on the second day, and began teaching them both traditional and modern music, holding impromptu concerts at the end of the day. Though this certainly cheered everyone up, it wasn't the same as going outside.

Especially on a nice day such as this one.

Suddenly Jasmine dashed around the corner. Kiku, confused, rushed to catch up, only to see her barreling into Feliciano's open arms.

"Ve~! Jasmine! Bel fiore, how are you doing today?"

Jasmine giggled, poking the Italian in the chest.

"Ah, Feli-kun, Ludwig-san." Kiku nodded to them, going over to retrieve the overenthusiastic child. "Good morning."

"Hello," was Ludwig's short, concise reply. "It's good to see you well; rumors have been circulating that the two Japanese men who died the other day were not the only ones."

Kiku's brow furrowed as he unconsciously clutched Jasmine closer to his chest. "I see… Is there anything to support those claims?"

"Nothing that I know of. However, these things are out of my… zone, if you understand." Ludwig gave Kiku a pointed look.

Confused, the Japanese man frowned. "What do you mean? I was just asking if you'd heard of anyone missing…"

"As far as I know, there's no groups of informants within the German ranks that make it their business to know what the Americans are doing," the blond said.

Kiku arched an eyebrow, letting a squirming Jasmine out of his grasp. "Are you implying that there are groups in the Japanese people that do do that?"

"I'm not implying anything," said Ludwig smoothly.

The Japanese man opened his mouth to reply, but was cut off when Feliciano spoke up. "Ve, Luddy, what about the Tei-"

"Feli! Shh!" Ludwig hastily put his hand over Feliciano's mouth, eyes darting around furtively. "Do you want to get caught?"

"Ve… Mi dispiace…" Feliciano apologized as he was released. "It's just that… well… Kiku deserves to know! He can keep a secret!"

Ludwig sighed and pinched his nose. "Well, we have to tell him now, don't we? You've leaked enough about it that he would get curious if we didn't."

Feliciano seemed to shrink into himself. "Sorry…" he whispered.

Kiku, who had watched the exchange with interest, decided to save Feliciano for now. "It's alright, Ludwig-san, I know about the Teiko."

Ludwig and Feliciano exchanged a glance. "How do you know?"

"They approached me a while ago. I've declined," he tried to say in an 'end-of-discussion' tone.

Well, so far, anyway, he amended mentally. But no need for them to know that.

Thankfully, Feliciano seemed to buy it, although Ludwig still looked slightly unsure.

"Can we just go to breakfast?" Kiku tried, his tone placating. "I'm tired of cold oatmeal."

"Is that what you've been eating?" Feliciano chattered as they made their way to the mess. "Ah, poor Kiku, that's nothing a person can really live on."

"Don't I know it," muttered Kiku. They hadn't been bringing the food at regular intervals, and the portions weren't nearly big enough to fill his stomach. As well as that, the damp gray sludge was unappetizing.

"What you really need right now is some magical food," Feliciano said authoritatively.

"... Magical food?" Kiku repeated, confused.

"Si! Ve, Luddy, do you think-"

"No, Feliciano. The kitchens will not allow you to make pasta for the entire camp. We've been through this before."

Kiku stifled a giggle. So that's what this is about. He tuned out their cheerful banter, making absent responses when they were required of him. It was a nice morning, a good one to be spending with friends like he was doing. Jasmine squealed with glee as Ludwig grabbed one hand and Feli the other and swung her through the air, and he smiled.

Even the routine division of the races didn't dampen his spirits. He smiled at them as they went their separate ways.

His cheerful feeling was truncated as he saw a familiar figure waiting by the mess; a man with a thin face and a long nose. Kiku tensed himself as he passed, ready for anything, but nothing happened. The thin man glanced over at him, eyes skimming to his feet and back up again before smiling and nodding companiably, though his eyes stuck to Kiku's back as they entered.

While they were eating, he kept glancing over his shoulder. It was obvious it was making Jasmine uncomfortable, as she squirmed each time he did it. "I'm sorry, little one," he soothed. "I just have to do this." The threat rang in his head clearer than ever: You may be able to protect yourself, but your little friend…

Jasmine tilted her head to the side, as if to ask him what exactly he was talking about.

But Kiku pretended he didn't understand, smiled, and patted her head. "Come on, you must eat something."

Jasmine huffed, but did as her guardian said.

After breakfast, Kiku had one of those horrible ideas that used to just be Alfred's specialty. There were entirely too many flaws in his plan, but it was...something. Anything, really, to convince himself he was doing something. Trying anything.

He convinced a suspicious Jasmine to go off with Luddy and Feliciano and waited by the door. People pushed past him, blinking a little as their eyes adjusted to the sun. It was dark and smoky in the mess, and it was almost always a big transition from the indoors to the outdoors.

Finally, the thin-faced man reappeared, talking to the woman - what was her name - Hikaru. Both of them didn't seem surprised to see him.

"Kiku," said Hikaru mildly. "For what do I have the pleasure?"

Kiku felt a sudden, irrational anger. Whatever it was, it made him clench his fists tightly, and made his voice sound rawer than he intended. "May I speak to you, privately?"

Hikaru glanced at the thin-faced man, tilting her head slightly. He nodded, and turned away.

"Come with me."

Kiku gulped, suddenly nervous. His moods were swinging like those of a teenage girl on her period. But he pushed it down and followed after Hikaru. It's for Jasmine, he reminded himself. I need to protect her, at least… Even if I can't protect the others.

"Why did you threaten Jasmine?" Best to get straight to the point, since this was all a spur-of-the-moment thing. He put on a mask of stone.

"Whatever it takes to motivate you," she said sweetly, but then softened her voice. "If it helps you sleep any better, I was rebuked by my superiors for that. It wasn't part of the plan."

"To what? Recruit me?"

She put her head to one side, and then the other. "Pretty much."

Kiku sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "So you're saying that you're not planning on hurting her, or any of my friends?"

Hikaru bit her lip. "Not unless absolutely necessary."

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

"If you join, and if you don't do anything stupid…" She absently twirled a lock of hair around her finger, "Then you're fine." Then Hikaru bared her teeth in a shark-like grin. "But we can always claim extenuating circumstances."

Kiku raised an eyebrow. "If you're trying to recruit me, you're not doing a very good job."

"Well, you've made it clear that you didn't want to be recruited last time we chatted, so I don't see why I should continue trying. Unless you do want to join?"

The no was on the tip of his tongue. Truly, it was. He was absolutely prepared to decline. Yes, that's it, he was just going to open his mouth and say "No, I don't want to join you." That's what he was going to do. It was common sense, really. Would he rather take care of a girl he was beginning to think of as his younger sister, or endanger his life by protesting and fighting back? Of course the answer was the first one, which was why he was going to say no.

Except he wasn't saying it. He was standing there, choking on his own words like some sort of idiot, and Hikaru was watching him with no great amount of amusement.

"I…" Kiku slumped, giving up. "I'll think about it."

Hikaru smiled. "I thought you might want to. Take your time; we're not going anywhere."

And with that, she turned and strode away from him, leaving him with more questions than he wanted.

He rejoined his friends momentarily. They were waiting for him around the corner, Ludwig leaning against the wall, his normal stony expression on his face, Feli and Jasmine playing some sort of hand game that resembled Patty Cake.

"What was that about?" asked Ludwig, too casually. Kiku frowned, confused as to his weird tone. "I was just talking to a girl-"

"Eh? Kiku's talking to a girl?" Feliciano put his hands down, much to Jasmine's displeasure. "Was she a pretty girl? Is she the one over there? Ah, she is pretty! You really should go marry her! Here, I'll ask her if - why're you making that face?"

Kiku was doing his best not to laugh, or doing his best to look like he was trying not to laugh, but on the inside he felt sick. Why did I ever agree to not disagree? Talking to them is a mistake. He grabbed the Italian's arm before he could dash off. "I'm not going to marry her. I'm not the flirt that you are."

Feliciano beamed. "Grazie, Kiku!"

"I don't think he meant that as a compliment," Ludwig mumbled. Luckily, Feliciano didn't hear him, but Kiku had to hide his smirk. Then he walked over to take Jasmine's hand.

"Come on, Jasmine. We have to go back now. Say goodbye."

Jasmine pouted, but waved obediently as Ludwig and Feliciano. The German nodded, and the Italian waved back cheerfully as Kiku hoisted the girl up and started walking back to their room.

Sorry, Jasmine. I'm going to have to keep you under close watch, until I decide. Perhaps it's better this way, but… I'm sorry.

I just hope this is for the best.

Dear Alfred,

How are you? I've been rather bored here, the past few weeks. There hasn't really been anything important that happened, and-

Kiku suddenly stabbed his pen into the paper. Startled, Jasmine looked up.

"Ah, sorry." Kiku smiled sheepishly, and Jasmine went back to playing with her marbles.

With a sigh, the Japanese man lifted his pen again.

I give up.

I don't know what to do. I don't know what I want anymore. I don't even know what I believe anymore. The Teiko offer a good, a wonderful, argument, but I can't seem to bring myself to agree to their solution. Especially since they threatened Jasmine.

And yet, I find myself increasingly drawn into their way of thinking. Especially since what happened. I want to help those in my situation, especially the children. I want to feel anger toward the government, for keeping us here. I want to do something, anything, and the Teiko are offering me that chance. I just don't know if rebellion is the answer.

Yao-nii-san always told me that it is our Asian tradition to live in harmony with our surroundings. Chinese Daoism, Japanese Shintoism, Buddhism, and so many other religions of Asian origin, they all center on peace. But then there is also honor. Honor, a highly valued characteristic in Japanese culture. Protecting honor is my duty, as a Japanese man.

I want to be peaceful, but I also want to preserve my people's honor. And, in this world of war, I'm not sure I can do both.

Please, Alfred, anyone. I need someone to tell me what to do. I need someone, no, something, even, to guide me into making the right choice. Both for myself and for Jasmine. For those in the camps with me. The tiniest hint will do. I just need something. Anything.

Please.

A/N: We're going to go on hiatus again. My apologies, but from the end of March to some day in April I'm going on another trip (school sponsored this time, and to China), and then we've got finals and other horrors in April.

Mmhm. We won't be back until at least the date when Sera gets back from China, but most likely longer. Like, a month to 6 weeks. So yeah… sorry. School is really messed up right now.

Omake, because at one point we had no idea where to go.

Suddenly she [Jasmine] broke her vow of silence and said, "The derivative of arcsin(x) is 1/sqrt(1-x^2)."

Kiku stared at her, his face blank. Then he burst into song.

Then Alfred teleported in and started singing Kumbaya.

And they all lived happily ever the end.

Except then Germany developed an atomic bomb and killed the US, so they all died.

"OHAYO GOZAIMASU!" yelled the entire population of Japan as they jumped onto the moon. Then they all died, too, because they had forgotten their spacesuits. Then the world imploded because of Murphy's Law. Then Maxwell's Demon appeared and started making energy more concentrated and violating the second law of thermodynamics. Then the earth re-formed and everyone was a cat and came back to life. Then Japan had a tuna crisis. Then the author decided to stop. FOURTH WALL OFFICIALLY BROKEN~! :D Woohoo omake achieved.

So, since Sera has already left on her trip, I'm shall say it this chapter! Review~! :)