A/N & WARNING: The last part contains smut. And holy hell, was it difficult to write. It also left me feeling a bit dirty. (translation: crying traumatized in a corner) I TRIED, OK? *runs away*

Disclaimer: I use some of the in-game dialogue in this fic, no copyright infringement intended. I do not own Mass Effect, I just borrow the world and the characters because Grunt. 'Nuff said.

Shepard walked to the console on the platform that carried two scions and a couple of exploding husks before her team had squashed them.

Miranda and Jack finished gathering the unused thermal clips from the dead collectors and joined the commander. She activated the platform and they began moving towards the area where tubes from every direction connected.

"EDI, what can you tell us?" she asked. "What are they doing?"

"The tubes are feeding into some kind of super structure," the AI replied. "It is emitting both organic and non-organic energy signatures. Given these readings, it must be massive."

Shepard, Jack and Miranda looked ahead and saw a hint of what EDI was talking about.

"Shepard," EDI continued, her voice an ominous warning. "If my calculations are correct, the super-structure is… A reaper."

The platform stopped and connected to the ones at the end of their path as the squad looked up, gawking at the structure before them with horrified awe.

The colossal construct bore an unmistakable resemblance to the upper half of a human skeleton, made out of some sort of dark alloy. The unfinished plating covered part of its chest and the skull was complete with teeth and a nasal aperture. The tubes were attached to its shoulders by two injection points for each; the material inside glowing a sickly orange. The blue lights embedded into the alloy reminded Shepard of the husks; and as if the whole thing wasn't eerie enough, its spine; looking like a tapering tail of a scorpion; was dangling in the air.

The collectors had diverged from the original design not only in terms of size; and if Shepard had to guess, the unfamiliar extra pieces would have to be weapons. The eye sockets, the mouth, the chest plating were all fitted with them, their sizes varying from 'huge' to 'are you fucking kidding me?'

"Not just any reaper," the commander managed, still staring at the creature towering over them. "A human reaper."

"Precisely," EDI said. "It appears the collectors have processed tens of thousands of humans. Significantly more will be required to complete the reaper."

Tens of thousands, Shepard thought, recalling the look in the colonist woman's eyes before her body was dissolved. They have died horrible, painful deaths to create this abomination. Her rage spread from her gut to her limbs, tingling at her fingertips.

"Have you gathered all the information you could?" she asked. "Because I'm planning to burn this thing to the ground."

"I have," EDI replied.

"Then we can learn all about it later. Right now, I'm only interested in how to take it down. Any suggestions?"

"The large tubes injecting the fluid are a weak structural link. Destroying them should cause the supports to collapse, and the reaper to fall."

"Then give us a minute, EDI," said the commander as the protective shields activated, covering the injection tubes the same moment more platforms appeared, coming their way. "We've got to take care of some old friends first."

"ASSUMING CONTROL."

"Right on time, asshole," Shepard growled, aiming for the Harbinger drone's head.

"The shield's up Shepard!" Jack yelled. "It's the last one!"

"On it!"

The tube came into focus through Shepard's rifle scope and she fired. The glass shattered and the processed human remains splattered all over the platforms, the smell of decay assaulting the squad members' noses once again. The pipes that were connected to the last injection tube swung loose in the air, ripping the reaper clean off its supports.

The platforms shook as it fell with a grinding metallic noise, lifeless like a puppet whose strings were severed. The squad walked to the edge of the platform after the tremors stopped and they looked down, making sure it was gone.

Shepard contacted the second team as she walked to the reactor. "Shepard to ground team. Status report."

The reply came from Thane. "We are holding, but they keep coming," he said. "A quick exit is preferable."

"Head to the Normandy," Shepard said. "Joker, prep the engines. I'm about to overload this place and blow it sky high."

"Roger that, commander," said the helmsman, allowing himself the time for a relieved sigh before he pulled up the displays, and saw the incoming call. Talk about dramatic timing, he thought. Rye's gonna love this. "Uh, commander?" he said. "I've got an incoming signal from the Illusive Man. EDI's patching it through."

"Keep the base?" Shepard asked in disbelief. "Keep the reaper? Have you lost your mind?"

"Our best chance against the reapers is to turn their own resources against them," the Illusive Man argued.

"No," Shepard said. "I won't let you of all people have the technology to process people, and I sure as hell don't trust you to leave that unfinished reaper unfinished."

"My goal is to save the humanity from the reapers at all costs. I've never hidden that from you," he said. "Imagine what we can learn, Shepard. Imagine the lives we can save if we study it. And imagine the lives that will be lost if we don't."

"You're wasting your time," Shepard shot back. "And mine. I will stop the reapers. I'll do what you brought me back to do. But I'll do it my own way, without having to use whatever technology we might find here, and without succumbing to the greed for power."

"You think I want this for myself?" the Illusive Man asked. "This is for humanity, Shepard. Cerberus is humanity. Some would say bringing you back was going too far. But look what you've accomplished. I didn't discard you because I knew your value. Don't be so quick to discard this facility. Think of the potential."

"Playing the 'you owe me your life' card huh?" Shepard said through gritted teeth. "I'm sick of your 'all for humanity' crap. What's humanity without human lives? Who exactly are you protecting if you're willing to sacrifice anyone? So yeah, I do think you want this for yourself. And stop acting like you'd done me a favor bringing me back. You did it because you needed me." She paused to take a breath and glanced at Miranda. "I'm ending the collectors right here, right now. And regardless of the role you play, I'm stopping the reapers. So thanks for my life, and consider my debt paid."

"This base is a gift!" the Illusive Man insisted, as if he hadn't heard a word she'd said. "You can't just destroy it Shepard!"

"Watch me."

"Miranda!" he yelled in a last, desperate attempt. "Do not let Shepard destroy the base!"

Jack's muscles tensed as she moved to a strategic position behind Miranda.

"Or what?" Miranda said, "You'll replace me next?"

"I gave you an order Miranda!"

"I noticed," said the XO. "Consider this my resignation."

"Think about what's at stake—"

"Well, that was awkward," Shepard said as they dropped the signal. Miranda had been one of her own for a while now, but it was still satisfactory to see her not even flinch as she stood up to her former boss.

Jack wasn't ready to share the sentiment. "Watch your back, Shepard," she said. "The cheerleader may be waiting for you to let your guard down to make her move."

"You're just bitter because you love to hate her," Shepard dismissed her concerns, smirking. "And now you have one less reason to." She walked to Miranda, giving her a slight nod before she crouched down to work on the reactor. "Ok, we're done. Let's move," she said, standing up. "We don't want to be here when it overloads." Feeling a vague tremor, she looked around, and the whole base began to shake as they heard Joker's voice over the radio.

"Shepard!" he yelled. "The reaper's active, it's coming your way!"

"Fuck!" Jack exclaimed and jumped back as a monstrous hand appeared next to her, grabbing on to the platform. They drew back, taking cover as the reaper pulled itself up.

"EDI says to go for the eyes!" yelled the helmsman with a manic laugh.

"Cain doesn't discriminate," Shepard said, switching to the heavy weapon. She cloaked and began charging it as the cannon inside the reaper's mouth lit up with a growing orange gleam. To her advantage, her target was very hard to miss, and she fired right before the reaper activated its beam, sinking into cover at the last minute. "Take cover!" she shouted, and the tide of red-orange energy passed over their heads, illuminating the platform as it burned through the weaker constructs.

"It's not over yet!" Miranda said and the reaper disappeared from their views only to pop back again, this time clinging to a platform to their right.

"Its friends have arrived!" Jack yelled, spotting more platforms coming their way.

"I have one more charge," Shepard said. "Cover me while I use it, and whatever you do, stay clear of that beam!" She stood up and cloaked, leaving the collectors to her squad as she readied the weapon and fired.

Despite a second direct hit from the Cain, the reaper remained intact and it kept attacking, moving around and destroying the platforms each time it changed its position.

This is an embryo, Shepard thought, not even a baby. Sovereign by itself almost destroyed the Citadel, so what exactly are we going to face when the adults arrive? She exhaled and switched to her rifle, waiting for the reaper to stop moving. Ok, now I go for the eyes.

In between the running around, fighting the collectors and hiding from the reaper's beams; Shepard managed to hit one of its eyes a seventh time. She cloaked and stormed across the platforms to find more unused thermal clips, since she had no idea how many shots it would take to bring it down.

She incinerated a collector drone on her way to cover as Jack and Miranda both went full-on biotic on the remaining hostiles. The enemies were being lifted in the air before they flew off the edges as if they'd miscalculated a trampoline jump, the sound of biotic warp and shockwave peaking and dying away over and over. Shepard inserted the last thermal clip she could salvage and aimed once again from her cover, hitting it in the eye. She switched to her pistol, but realized soon that her last shot had done it.

The reaper swayed from side to side as she looked on and flames spurted from its skull, the blasts spreading to its chest and along its spine. It extended one arm in an attempt to hang on and the squad shivered with the noise as it fell; loud, shrill and grating like an enormous rusty hinge.

"Hold on tight!" Shepard yelled and tried to keep her balance on the convulsing surface as the reaper's arms slammed against the platforms and the pillars, sending them flying like they were made out of cardboard.

"Shepard!" Jack cried, and the commander saw her slipping away. She threw herself towards Jack, catching her wrist before the reaper's spine-tail hit the platform's base, sending them tumbling backwards. As she tried to get up on her feet, a shadow fell over her and she looked up, her eyes growing wide.

She pulled herself into fetal position and one of the metal panels collapsed on her, causing everything to go dark.

She came to; after a couple of minutes she assumed, considering they weren't blown up yet. She pushed the panel off of her and looked around, spotting Jack lying motionless. She ran to her to check her vitals and the biotic opened her eyes with a groan. Shepard helped her up, her eyes seeking Miranda.

"Miranda!" she called, simultaneously trying to raise the Normandy.

"There!" Jack yelled, pointing to Miranda under a pillar. Both hurried to her, and Shepard lifted the pillar as Jack eased its weight with her biotics. Miranda was alive but unconscious, and her left arm was hanging at an impossible angle.

"Damn it, we're out of medigel," Shepard said. "Come on, help me lift her up." She threw her good arm over her shoulder, and static rang inside her ear. "Joker? Is that you?" she said and the static rose and fell, gradually becoming Joker's frantic voice.

"Do you copy?" the helmsman yelled. "Commander? Come on Shepard don't leave me hanging, do you copy?" he repeated, his heart pumping dread through his veins. Don't you dare to this to me again, he thought, feeling as if he was falling down a bottomless pit.

"I'm here Joker," Shepard said as Miranda opened her eyes. "I'm all right. We're all right."

Joker let out the breath he was holding and stared at the feed from Shepard's visor that started streaming again after reestablishing the signal.

"Did the ground team make it?" Shepard asked, her voice pulling him together.

"They've made it. Everyone made it Rye. We're just waiting for you," he replied, and saw the seeker swarms clustering.

"Shit!" the helmsman and the commander yelled in unison and Shepard moved, hurrying to reach the rendezvous point while dragging Miranda.

"EDI, take the helm," Joker said, getting up off his chair and limping to the airlock. "Someone get me a weapon!"

"HUMAN. YOU CHANGED NOTHING," Harbinger said, its disembodied voice filling the air as its target audience ran for her life.

"We don't have time for this!" Shepard said, sprinting through the base with Jack following. Miranda picked up her pace, adrenaline finally kicking in as collector drones showed up, chasing after them.

Among the explosions, gunfire and the rumble, Shepard could hear the Normandy nearby.

"Miranda, Jack, go!" she yelled and turned around. She cloaked and fired, buying time for the biotics before she followed them.

The Normandy appeared at the clearing and the main airlock opened. Shepard shot a quick glance its way while she defended Jack and Miranda as they made it to the ship; and she thought she saw Joker there with an assault rifle. She cloaked, ejected the thermal clip from her pistol and inserted a new one; and two collectors fell at her feet before she could fire.

"Come on Shepard!" yelled the helmsman and continued firing as the overload took effect and the base crumbled, blasts getting closer by the minute.

Shepard turned around and ran, and a collapsing column hit the platform between her and the airlock, sending it tumbling down.

"Riley!" Joker cried and Shepard leapt forward. Joker dropped the rifle and took a step to the edge of the hatch as if he was hypnotized, but Miranda grabbed him and pulled him back. "Let me go," he yelled, and Shepard caught the edge of the hull.

Joker sagged as Jack pulled the commander inside the airlock, and Miranda let him go. He picked up the rifle again, shooting without aim at the regrouping hostiles. "Seal the hatch EDI!"

The outer airlock door closed, and before they could take a breath the AI's warning rang inside the airlock.

"Detonation in ten, nine, eight—"

The inner door opened, and they rushed to the bridge.

"Yeah, I got the gist of it EDI," Joker said, throwing himself into his chair. "Hold on!" The displays came to life with a wave of his hand, and the Normandy accelerated as his fingers blurred over the controls.

The ship cut through the explosions, the flames licking the hull as Joker maneuvered her away from the rubble and towards the relay. The Normandy made it to the relay's range through the unstable debris, and the helmsman relaxed as they were propelled across the space, popping back next to the twin relay in the Sahrabarik system.

"Holy crap," Shepard said, watching the clear, calm space from the viewport. "We made it." She leaned forward, squeezing Joker's shoulder. "We made it," she repeated, and Joker put his hand on hers, looking at her.

"We did," he said, and they both flinched as sparks flew when a torn cable came loose and dangled from the overhead.

"EDI, do we have enough fuel to make it to Omega?" Shepard asked, looking at the cable.

"Affirmative," the AI replied.

"Then we dock there and plan the next step. Joker, set the course."

"Aye aye," the pilot said without skipping a beat and plotted the course. "ETA about 90 minutes."

Shepard turned to look at Jack and Miranda. Jack was in one of the chairs, clinging to the armrests and shaking her legs like she was about to jump up and start running. Miranda was sitting on the deck, clutching her dislocated shoulder.

"The biotic barriers are great Miranda," Shepard began. "No argument here. But for fuck's sake woman, consider some armor next time," she snapped, shaking her head. She turned to Jack. "What the hell are you smirking for? You're no better, you half-naked delinquent!"

Jack laughed as she stood up. "Well, the bitch is back," she said, and Miranda nodded in agreement.

"Does this beautiful moment of friendship mean I can trust you to help Miranda to the med-bay?" Shepard asked. "Without you guys killing each other on the way?"

Jack held out a hand and Miranda grudgingly took it. "It wouldn't be any fun to smash her when she's in this condition," Jack said, leading the XO to the CIC.

"Just try it, half-naked delinquent," Shepard heard Miranda threaten her as they walked away.

"You get yourself checked too Jack!" yelled the commander after them, and sank into the co-pilot seat.

"EDI, make sure you're recording that heartwarming walk," Joker said. "I think they'd appreciate it when I have it made into a holo and put it where everybody can see."

"Or," Shepard said, "We may need to use it as evidence."

"Or that," Joker conceded.

They both reclined in their seats and turned to each other.

"Hi," Shepard said.

"Hey." Joker stared at her for a moment, and a chuckle escaped his throat. Another followed, slowly growing into an uncontrollable fit of laughter. It generated from the center of his chest, as if all the pressure that had built up over the last few hours was being released with it. His shoulders shook as the laughter faded, leaving its place to the occasional wheezing.

"Something funny Joker?" Shepard asked with a puzzled laugh of her own, and Joker could only shake his head and wipe the tears from his eyes.

"You almost died," he said as he stopped and gasped for air. "Again!"

"Uh-huh?"

The traces of his mad laughter vanished from Joker's features. He looked at her again, his eyes a brighter green and his gaze sharp. "Don't do that again," he said, and it didn't sound like a request.

Shepard opened and closed her mouth, suddenly feeling nauseated and lightheaded. She looked down with a weak nod, rubbing her left palm with her thumb.

"You ok?" Joker asked.

"Yeah," the commander muttered. "Yeah, I'm fine." She smiled and stood up. "I should go, check up on the crew. We need to discuss where we go from here," she said, her smile widening. "Because we're not going back to Cerberus."

"I'd figured as much," said the helmsman. "So if the Illusive Man calls?"

"Just loose the channel."

"Roger that."

"EDI, from this moment on, Cerberus has absolutely no authority over this vessel or her crew. That includes you too, I hope."

"My allegiance is to you and the Normandy, Shepard," EDI said. "I'll take the necessary measures."

"Good," said the commander, loitering.

"Hey, have you noticed that this is like our hobby now?" Joker said. "Stealing the Normandy I mean."

"It's not really stealing," Shepard said and turned around. "She's ours, isn't she?" She started walking, feeling stupid, scared and awkward as she couldn't find a single meaningful word to say to Joker. It's all fine when you're throwing yourself into mortal danger, but when it's normal, it's real, you chicken out? she thought. Pull yourself together and grow up. He deserves better than that. She stopped and took a deep breath before turning back. "I wasn't hallucinating when I saw you holding an assault rifle back there, right?" she asked.

Joker swiveled his chair to face her and grinned. "You were not," he replied proudly. "The words you're looking for are 'thank you Joker', or 'you're my hero Joker' or—"

"Yeah, thank you so much Joker, for firing a goddamn assault rifle that kicks like a horse without wearing any armor," Shepard shot back. "Have you even recovered from your previous injuries yet?"

"I handled the recoil just fine," Joker said, still grinning. "You can preach all you want; I know you thought it was hot."

And there it was; that same warmth, the sudden thumping of her heart and the weird sorcery that kept drawing her in.

"Ok," she said and let out a loud, unashamed sigh. "Maybe a little," she confessed before walking away.

The Normandy docked at Omega, and Shepard gathered the team in the briefing room.

"I got in touch with Liara," she said, but rather she'd returned the call that had come from the asari the minute they'd escaped the collector base. "She still has many contacts on Illium, so we can lay low there while we finish the repairs," she continued. "And we can stay ahead of possible threats from our former employer. Liara also very generously offered much needed resources, now that daddy won't be providing them. We do a thorough systems check here, get the Normandy ready. Our next destination is Illium. Miranda?"

"Commander?"

"Can I assume the crew understands our current situation?" she asked.

"The crew is informed, Shepard. The decision hasn't caused an apparent dissent."

That put a smile on the commander's face. "And the Illusive Man?" she said. "What do you think his next move will be?"

"He wouldn't come after you just yet," Miranda said. "He knows when to cut his losses. He was prepared to lose you and the Normandy during this mission. But," she paused for a second before she continued, "he will come after me and Chambers. We are the only ones who weren't new recruits when we were assigned to this mission. He'll consider us liabilities."

"Understood," Shepard said. "We'll find a way to keep you under the radar if it comes to that." She looked at their faces. "I will eventually turn the Normandy over to the Alliance," she said. "And myself. But not before I make sure everyone on this ship is safe on their chosen path." She put her hands on the table. "We have not lost a single life on this so-called suicide mission," she said, her eyes sparkling. "I say we've all earned a small celebration."

"After spending enough time with her, you just know," Garrus said, looking around in the port observation, "that you need to run like hell, as far as possible when Shepard utters the word 'celebration'." He checked behind the bar to find Donnelly drooling on the floor, shirtless. "But you still don't."

…

"It's not strip poker Donnelly!" Hawthorne yelled. "Keep your goddamn shirt on!"

"Leave him be," Gabby slurred and gulped down another shot of rum. "He wants to get naked, let him get naked," she said, sighing.

Donnelly sank behind the bar as Miranda approached them, not looking too happy and holding something between her fingertips, as far from herself as her arm extended. "That thing," she grated, "Landed on my face. You want to tell me whose shirt it is?"

…

Jacob laughed and lifted the engineer off the floor and put him in a chair as Garrus tried to wake Gabby up, who was sleeping on the bar with skyllian five cards scattered on and around her.

The door opened and Jack entered. "I found two in the men's room," she said. "They looked very happy."

"Ugh," Kasumi groaned, trying to sit up on the couch. "Everybody's getting some but me." She gave up, letting herself fall back. "And I have a krogan in my bed."

They all turned to look at Grunt in Kasumi's cot, snoring and twitching in his sleep.

…

"Why don't they have pictures?" Grunt complained, opening a book from Kasumi's shelf.

"Joker might have some books with pictures," Jack said with a smirk as Kasumi rushed to the krogan, taking the book and putting it back on the shelf.

"Says the woman who's a walking picture book," Joker retorted.

"This is a nice plant," Grunt muttered, leaning forward, looking at the pot near Kasumi's bed.

"Oh no, please, no!" Kasumi cried and Grunt threw up inside it.

Gardner walked to them. "I'll take care of it," he grumbled, carrying the pot away as the krogan fell on the bed.

…

"That makes eighteen, us not included," Jacob said. "Who are we forgetting?"

"Samara?"

"Accounted for," Garrus said. "She left with Dr. Chakwas. And Thane slipped away to the life support when people started discussing the hallucinogenic properties of his skin."

…

"I want to spend time with Kolyat. I will take my leave when you return to the Alliance," said the drell. "But I will come to you if you require my help again, anytime in the future Siha." He held out his hand, offering an open palm.

"Thank you, Thane," Shepard said, putting her hand into his. "For everything. I'm going to miss you."

"And I you."

"Seriously?" Patel shrieked, staring at Thane.

"Drell skin infused with mild venom. Oral contact may cause hallucinations," Mordin explained.

"Well, I wouldn't mind having a taste of that," said the crewman, louder than she'd intended.

"I believe it is time for me to return to my station," said Thane.

Shepard laughed and glanced at Joker, who was seemingly in deep conversation with Garrus.

"Still hate him," said the pilot, watching Thane go. "'I mean, come on. A ninja assassin with a 19th century gentleman attitude, who'd get you high by one nip at his skin?"

"Sure you're not suffering from a case of misplaced frustration?" Garrus said. "Anyway, don't worry. It's just platonic. What you call a 'kindred spirit'."

"I don't know what you're talking about," said Joker. "But it doesn't make me feel any more sympathetic towards him." He smirked at the turian with a nod towards Tali's direction. "Speaking of frustration…"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

…

"Anyone knows where Zaeed is?" Jacob asked.

"Mr. Massani is at the shooting range with Legion," EDI replied.

…

"We do not 'gloat'. We are stating the facts. Based on our observations, we have come to the conclusion that this platform's skill exceeds yours."

"No goddamn way a piece of junk right out the factory can beat me at sniping!"

"I don't know about the platform Zaeed," Shepard said, "But I'm pretty sure that Legion's programs are older than you."

"Shepard-Commander's skill is superior to ours," Legion said.

"Shut the hell up."

…

"Professor Solus is in his lab and Miss Lawson is in her quarters," EDI continued. "I will alert the commander if the intoxication of the crew poses a danger to the ship or the crew members."

"The potential danger may be the commander herself," Garrus said.

"Would you classify engaging the mass effect core while the ship is docked as dangerous?" asked the AI, sobering the ones already awake, including Tali who crawled from behind the couch.

"That was a joke," EDI said.

After everyone recovered from EDI's joke, Tali scanned the room. "Where's Shepard?" she asked.

"The commander has retired to her quarters," EDI replied as Garrus walked to Tali, helping her up.

"She was right here just a while ago, talking to Joker," said the quarian.

"Jeff has also retired to the commander's quarters," informed the AI.

"Huh," Jack uttered as Jacob's jaw dropped.

"EDI, was that a joke?" Tali asked and turned to Garrus, who gave her a faint shrug. "About time," he murmured.

"It was not a joke," EDI clarified.

…

"I don't expect the Alliance to reinstate me, but I'm still a Council spectre," Shepard said.

"But you've already received a message from Admiral Hackett, haven't you?" Joker asked.

"I only know that he wants to talk to me about something. He'll contact me with the details later." She sighed. "Why are we talking about this now Moreau? Come on, this is a party!"

A loud thump behind the sofa distracted them and they turned around, but couldn't see anything out of the ordinary.

"Hey where did Tali go?" Shepard asked.

Joker shrugged in response and gazed into her eyes. "There might be something else we should talk about," he said, his heart pounding.

"I don't really want to talk about it," Shepard replied, and Joker's heart dropped to his stomach as he drew back. He stared at the overhead and exhaled.

"Oh."

Shepard leaned closer. "No, Jeff; I don't want to talk about it." She stood up and smiled at him as his face lit up with realization.

"Ooh."

…

"And I have a krogan in my bed," Kasumi repeated.

Joker was sitting on the sofa in Shepard's cabin; his cap on the floor and his commander on his lap, straddling him.

Shepard leaned in, her soft lips parting as she pressed them against his. He instinctively leaned forward for a closer feel but she stopped and drew back.

"Wha?" he panted as Shepard ran her fingers through his hair.

"Are you drunk?" she asked.

"No?" Joker said, his hands on her thighs. "I don't know. Are you?"

Shepard laughed and leaned back in. "I don't know," she said, looking into his eyes before their lips met again. Her warm tongue swirled around his, and Joker tasted the flavor he'd been craving; but it only intensified the hunger burning in his gut.

His hands caressed over her hips and slid inside her shirt, the feel of her smooth skin under his fingers making his heart beat even faster. He broke the kiss and looked at her, to make sure this was what she too wanted.

Shepard's blue-gray eyes flickered with desire and she smirked, her hands dropping to the hem of his shirt. She tugged it free of his pants and gently pulled it up, admiring the thin line of hair that trailed down his abdomen.

Joker reluctantly got his hands off her to let her pull the shirt over his head, his breath catching with each brush of her fingertips along the way. She threw the shirt behind her somewhere and shifted her body closer to him while trying not to crush him with her weight.

Joker appreciated her restraint, which made things go much smoother. If she hadn't known the extent of his condition; there'd probably be a lot of pausing while trying to find a comfortable position and some injuries, not really the greatest mood setter, given he was already sporting a few bruised ribs.

He moved his hands back to her hips as she kissed his neck and nipped at his jawline, her nimble fingers teasing the skin over his chest and along his abdomen.

She paused and breathed against his shoulder, feeling her need grow hotter inside as his muscles contracted under her touch. She lifted her head, her hair and breath grazing Joker's ear.

Joker inhaled the fresh scent of orange blossoms on her and let out a low growl, pulling her shirt off with one swift move and tossing it aside. He stared at the view at his eye level, gulping. The black, lace-trim bra hugged her breasts, pushing them together ever so slightly to create the perfect cleavage; and the nipples peaking beneath the bra did wonders for his arousal.

"Is this leather?" he breathed and Shepard leaned forward.

"Why don't you find out yourself?" she whispered.

Joker complied, stroking the sides of her breasts as she vaguely arched her back. He reached behind her and said, "On second thought, I don't care that much about the bra," before he unfastened it. The straps slipped off her shoulders and Joker helped with the rest of it, letting the fabric fall on the deck.

"Holy fuck," he exhaled, brushing his thumb over one pink nipple and a short moan escaped Shepard's throat. His erection twitched inside his pants as he cupped and kissed her breasts, teasing the nipples with his lips, tongue and teeth. She let out another, louder moan, and clung to his nape with one hand while the other reached down, undoing his belt. She slipped her hand inside his pants, stroking his cock as she rubbed herself against it, glad to find out he wasn't lacking at all in size.

Joker dug his fingers into her hair, bringing her face to his eye level and kissed her lips as if he wanted to devour her. Shepard's lust matched his as she deepened the kiss further, her teeth sinking into his lower lip. When she let go, he could taste his own blood in his mouth and he knew the pain she'd left was an invitation. He smirked and wiped the blood, cursing his body that wouldn't allow a different position at the moment.

His hands found her thighs and traveled over them to her hips, then to her waist; his touch rougher than before. With a wavering breath Shepard stood up, letting him slide her fatigues down, and helped him with his pants. Joker kicked off his boots and pants, and Shepard did the same as she gently pushed him back on to the sofa.

His gaze roamed over her long, athletic legs to the curve of her hips, the outline of her abdominal muscles and her firm breasts, trailing along her neck and her face. Shepard raised a brow and gave him a mischievous smile as her eyes darted down, urging his to follow. She pulled one side of her panties down, and he groaned in anticipation as he saw the darker shade of the copper hair hidden beneath.

Shepard gestured to the hard bulge inside his boxers. "If I'm going to show you mine," she said, adding a soft, seductive tone to her voice and got rid of the last piece of clothing on her. She moved closer to him, putting one knee on the sofa. Joker could feel the heat radiating from her as he freed himself from the boxers and pulled her to him, his fingers exploring the wet heat within.

"Rye," he said, his voice thickening to a low, husky tone as she writhed and moaned in response to his touch.

Naked and vulnerable and feral; she was both the predator and the prey, just like he was.

Shepard looked at him, her heart trying to escape her chest. He was gorgeous, like a piece of art with his broad shoulders and strong arms; the well-toned body which left her wondering when exactly he worked out. Damn, she thought. He was hot, his messy dark hair and stubble contrasting his clear green eyes; the eyes which gave her a look as if he'd die if she didn't touch him soon. She leaned in, slow and deliberate without breaking eye contact and reached down between his legs, stroking and guiding him to her opening as she lowered herself down onto him with a gasp. She shivered as his girth stretched her tight walls and she lifted herself halfway, taking a second before burying him inside her again.

Joker's eyes closed as he shuddered; the hot, slick and tight feel of her around him momentarily taking his breath away. He opened his eyes as she began moving at a slow, torturous pace and grabbed her hips; eliciting a small moan of pleasure from her.

Shepard moved faster for a while, but then returned to her slow pace, grabbing Joker's hair and giving him an evil little smile.

"Don't," Joker threatened with a growl, but she kept changing the rhythm; keeping him frustrated with a daring look on her face. He squeezed her lower back, his short nails pressing against her skin and he gripped a nipple between his teeth until she arched, the mild pain amplifying her pleasure.

"Two can play this game," Joker whispered as she slowed down again, reaching down and brushing his finger over her clit while he busied his other hand with her breasts.

Shepard's breath hitched and she let out a small cry, catching his hand and pulling it down again as her pace steadied. Joker rubbed the sensitive nub, watching her chest heave as she lifted and lowered herself as fast and hard as she could without breaking him. He held on to sofa as her hand reached down and stroked the base of his cock, making his urgency grow and throb all over his body.

Shepard gasped as the tension built up, relentless and unbearable. She writhed, unsteadily guiding Joker's free hand to her breast. He squeezed the hardened tip as his fingers rubbed harder against her clit; causing the jolts of pleasure running through her nerves to connect and explode.

When Joker saw Shepard's eyes lose focus, he stopped holding back and gave into the bliss; reveling in each contraction of her hot flesh enveloping him. His muscles tensed and twitched as the pressure of the imminent climax grew, and spasms spread throughout his body when the release came, hard; euphoria washing over him.

Shepard threw her head back, screaming his name and her world went bright, the faint but constant ringing in her ears drowning every other sound. She took short breaths, trying to return to the physical plane of existence.

When the sensation dulled down, she let out a shaky breath and opened her eyes. Joker lifted his head and they stared at each other, out of breath and happily stunned.

Shepard ran a hand through Joker's hair to his neck. "You ok?" she asked.

"That," Joker breathed, "Is an understatement." He chuckled as he noticed the state of her hair and reached out, trying to brush some of it off her face to no avail.

Shepard laughed and stood up, leaving his lap cold and empty. "I was asking about your injuries, but good to know."

Joker watched her walk around naked for a moment, then looked around for his underwear which he found by his feet on the deck. Uh, ok, he thought as he wore it, realizing he had no idea what to do next. Should I just get dressed and go? Offer to stay? Man, it'd be awkward if she didn't want me to stay though. But what if she does and thinks that I wouldn't? Do I want to stay? He swallowed, her taste lingering on his tongue. Hell yeah I want to stay.

Shepard walked to her locker, pulling out a loose white top and a pair of baby blue shorts. Joker raised a brow as she slipped into them.

"What? I sleep in this," she said defensively.

"Of course you do," Joker said, grinning from ear to ear.

"Shut up or I'll get you a matching pair," she threatened, and threw herself on the bed. "I wouldn't mind if you wanted to stay," she said, but it sounded like a question.

Joker looked down and shook his head. I'm an idiot, he thought. Though that's nothing new. "I wouldn't mind staying," he replied and walked to her, joining her in the bed.

He moved closer and touched her cheek, leaning in for a kiss. Her lips parted in response, welcoming his tongue in as the kiss deepened, replacing her satisfaction with passion and greed.

"I think we should do this more often," she said, their lips still touching.

"That's not going to be a problem," Joker said, pulling her under him and taking off her top. "Because I don't think we'll be able to actually sleep together."

"Sleep is overrated," she said as Joker planted burning kisses along her neck, shoulders and chest, moving down. Her heartbeat quickened as he tossed the shorts aside, his stubble tickling her inner thigh and igniting the fire below once again. She closed her eyes and inhaled, and a fleeting thought passed through her mind before she surrendered to the ecstasy.

He smells like the ocean.

A/N: Hi, it's me again. Just wanted to make something clear, I imagine in the ME universe a method of birth control would be common among female soldiers AND since these two people get regularly checked by a meticulous doctor, I also imagine they know they're safe from STDs. Bottom line, use protection.