Jay had managed to control his nerves right up until they pulled up at Caitlyn's parents house. Once he realised that in just a few strides he would have to knock on the door and face the mistakes of his past his mouth went dry and he could feel his heartbeat in his temples.

Caitlyn was his high school sweetheart, his first everything and for a long time, he'd thought he'd eventually end up back with her.

Now, his heart laid with Erin and he knew without a doubt he wanted to start a family with her and spend the rest of his life in her arms, but that didn't mean he wasn't at least a little worried about what feelings seeing Caitlin again might stir up.

Caitlyn's mother, Helen, had been welcoming and loving of Jay from the very first moment she'd met him. Ian, her father however, had taken a little more warming up to. All he saw was a 17 year old boy trying to get into his only daughters pants. While Jay hadn't had the purest of intentions, it hadn't been his only intention and once Ian realised that Jay loved Caitlyn he'd come around. Before long Ian had become more of a father figure than Jay's own father, that was until he ruined everything.

Jay and Ruzek climbed the steps that lead to the front door and Jay raised hand to knock but then pulled it away.

Ruzek sighed loudly "You know, for someone to answer, you have to actually knock" he leant around him to knock on the door loudly. Adam wanted to get this over and done with, he hated this whole situation and he hated even more that he'd been dragged into it.

"Shut up Ruzek, I was getting to it" Jay said annoyed and shoved his hands into his pockets to hide that they were now shaking.

"Yeah, just like you were getting to telling Erin you were married" he snapped back sarcastically just before the door flung open.

A little girl with chocolate brown hair and eyes stood before them with a big smile on her face that fell as soon as she saw it wasn't who she'd been expecting. "Grandma, it's not Papa" she yelled before slamming the door shut again.

"Maybe we got the wrong house?" Jay said confused pulling out his phone to check the address. An older lady opened the door. She had the same smile as the little girl but it quickly fell into an icy glare when her eyes landed on Jay. Not the wrong house Adam thought to himself.

"Jay Halstead, I hope it's a mistake you're on my doorstep" she said her voice laced with anger.

"Helen, Hi I, uh, I just need to get some details for Caitlyn, I need to talk to her"

"After 8 years, you suddenly need to talk to Caitlyn?" she sneered at him

"I just need"

"You need" she sneered leaning forward, pointing her finger angrily at him "that's the problem with you Jay Halstead, you're only ever around when there's something you need. You married my daughter and then fled the country"

"That's not really fair Helen, I went to fight a war"

"A war which you didn't feel compelled to fight before you were married, you didn't even come back when your own mother got sick. Guess the apple didn't fall far from the tree with you after all" she snapped, her words cutting straight through Jay. He had spent his whole adult life trying to not be like his father, but here he was keeping secrets and lying to Erin, not to mention how badly he'd hurt Caitlyn in the past.

Ruzek noticed the little girl come back into the entry, he smiled at her and knelt down "Hi sweetheart, my name is Detective Ruzek, this is Detective Halstead we are just here to talk to your Grandma." He said showing her his badge hanging from his neck, she looked scared and he was hoping to give her some reassurance.

"Is Grandma in trouble?" she whispered

"No baby" Helen answered quickly and pulled her into her side.

"We just need her help finding someone" Ruzek smiled as he stood back up.

"Hannah, go find the IPad and go upstairs please, now" Helen said sternly, she watched her disappear down the hallway and then turned back to Jay and Adam just as the back door swung open and an older man appeared.

"What the hell are you doing in my house?" he yelled angrily coming towards them, his eyes trained on Jay.

"Steven, calm down, that is not going to help anything" Helen said getting in his way so he couldn't move any closer to Jay.

"Calm down?" he scoffed at her.

She sighed and turned back to Jay "Jay, you can leave your number, we will talk to her. If she wants to contact you, she will"

"I really need…" Jay started before Adam cut him off.

"That sounds like a reasonable idea… If you could just let her know it's important" Adam said resting his hand on Jay's shoulder. Jay shot Adam a look but agreed once he saw the little girl had returned. He handed his card to Caitlyn's father, who refused to accept it. Jay sighed and placed it on the side table.

"For what it's worth I never meant to hurt her, and I am really sorry." Jay said before walking out.

"Well that didn't go quite as I expected it to" Jay sighed as he pulled away from the curb.

"What'd you expect? They'd be happy to see their estranged son in law show up on their doorstep asking about the wife he hasn't bothered with for 8 years?" Ruzek said his voice dripping with sarcasm, it had hit him in there, seeing Caitlyn's parents how angry he would be if anyone ever did that to Penny. Jay wouldn't be breathing if he'd have been Steven.

"I expected them to at least give me her number" Jay scoffed "How long do you think it will take her to call?"

"I don't know, I haven't had the pleasure of meeting Mrs Halstead so I can't really comment"

"Don't call her that" Jay snapped.

Adam sucked his teeth "That little girl, any chance she's yours?" it had been bugging him since he'd seen her. He'd guessed she was about 7 or 8, just a little younger than Zoe and that seemed to line up with the last time Jay had seen her. He was pretty sure Jay hadn't connected the dots yet.

"What? Why, no. No, she would have told me"

"Would she?" Adam challenged with his eyebrows raised "I don't know that I would've in her shoes" Jay glared at Adam but didn't reply "Does she have brothers or sisters?"

"A brother" Jay answered.

"Well, I guess you could be right then" Adam shrugged as they pulled into the district carpark. "Kim's going to ask me about my day."

Jay let out a long breath and pinched the bridge of his nose "You know she would tell Erin straight away"

"You should have already told Erin, Jay. This is making it so much worse, every day that you keep sneaking around is making it worse"

"Yeah but I'm too far in now aren't I?" Jay snapped before climbing out of the truck and angrily walking into the district not bothering to wait for Adam.

Adam stood in the parking lot for a while trying to think of what he should do. There wasn't really anything for him to do, not really. It wasn't his place to get involved, and Kim didn't need this right now. He stared at a couple of patrol officers smoking and for the first time in years he desperately wanted one. "Fucking Halstead" he muttered to himself before walking inside, Kim would have his balls in a vice if he ever picked that habit back up.

…..

Kim was lying on the floor on her stomach in front of Penny who was having her 'tummy time'. She was screaming her lungs out and Kim was rattling every toy she owned in front of her to get her to stop.

"Baby girl mommy doesn't make the rules; the stupid doctors do. They tell me your head will look funny if I don't. Come on baby you don't cry for Daddy like this." The timer on her phone went off and she quickly picked her up and calmed her down.

"You know, I don't know why you like him so much more than me" Kim smiled touching the tip of her finger to Penny's nose gently. "I grew you, you know. Daddy did next to nothing. I'm the real superstar here" she laughed at herself "Is talking to you kind of the same as talking to myself?" Kim shook her head "I hope not" she reached for the phone as it started ringing and smiled when she saw the caller ID.

"We are both still alive" Kim laughed when she answered.

"I'm impressed" Adam teased with a grin on his face.

"Thought you would be, how's work? Glad to be back?"

"I miss you both, but yeah, it's nice to be back though it's quiet. I went out with Halstead but turned out to be nothing so just back here avoiding the last of the paperwork, I can't wait for Kev to be back" Adam groaned.

"I talked to Kels before, he's got a medical today, he's hoping he'll be cleared, at least for desk duty" Kim said scooping Penny up and placing her into the swing.

"Do you want me to pick up something for dinner on the way home?"

Kim opened the fridge examining what was in there "Nah it's okay, I have it covered"

"Wow, keeping the baby alive and cooking dinner don't set the bar too high on day one Darlin" He chuckled, leaning back in his chair.

Kim laughed "I never said what you were getting for dinner, maybe it's just a cold hot dog"

"I have a hot dog you can have, I guarantee it's not cold though" just as Kim was about to respond with more than just laughter, Kev walked up the stairs into the bullpen "Darlin, Atwater just got here, and he got himself up the stairs like a big boy, you'd be so proud" Adam said grinning like a Cheshire Cat.

"A big boy that has been cleared and can kick your ass again" Kev joked "Tell Mama I'm stopping by on my way from here"

"You hear that?" Adam asked Kim.

"I did, he's totally right, I love you but he could kick your ass"

"Yep, that's what he said, on his way from here. I'll see you when I get home" Adam ignored what Kim had said not wanting to give Kev any more ammunition.

Kim laughed loudly "Ok baby, I love you"

"Love you too" Adam laughed before hanging up and standing to hug Kevin. "Desk duty?"

"Full duties, aced my physical" he sang and did a spin on his bad leg.

"Hell yes" Adam grinned and gave him a high five.

A/N I'm so sorry for the lack of updates and the quality of this chapter, I have literally been staring at this for over two weeks and finally just decided to get rid of it so I can move on!

I totally under estimated how hard it would be to write Jay and Erin :/. I had planned to have their fights in here, but I'm doubtful that's going to happen. It will stick much more to the fallout, and the effect anything might have on Kim and Adam.