A series of conversations between Lestrade, Sherlock and John as they compare themselves and those around them to characters from other works of fiction. With occasional appearance from other characters. The first line is always by Lestrade, or someone with that last name!
I do not own any of the characters of BBC Sherlock, or any of the literal works mentioned in these stories.
This chapter is a mashup of anything that crossed my mind, but I couldn't expand on it. For Raychaell Dionzeros, Fjord, CHiKa-RoXy, and all the others who requested Doctor Who! It's in there, somewhere...
At the flat in 221B:
"So, Sherlock, fancy meeting you here!"
"I live here Lestrade."
"You've been injected with an unknown drug Greg; we've brought you to Baker Street so you could recover from it." John informed him.
"Okay." Then after ten seconds Greg piped up again, "I'm bored!"
"Um…" John was a bit uneasy, "Want to play a game or something?" He asked with uncertainty.
"I'll get the Cluedo board!" Sherlock jumped enthusiastically from his seat.
"No!"
"But John!" Sherlock whined.
"I told you before, we are never playing that game again!" John said firmly.
"You guys have Cluedo?" Greg asked.
"Unfortunately!" John muttered.
"Hehehe, you guys never fail to surprise me!" Greg said with something close to drunken giggling.
"Glad we're able to amuse you Lestrade," Sherlock said while placing a bucket beside the sofa Greg was sitting on, "Now, lie down and go to sleep."
"But I don't want to sleep!" Greg whined.
"Trust me Greg, it'll be best for every one if you tried to sleep it off. There'd be less chance of embarrassment." John reasoned.
"We have never compared ourselves to rock stars." Greg mused.
"Rock stars? But John, I thought you said stars were made from condensed hot gasses!" Sherlock said with near panicking tone.
"Or we can do Pop stars if you want." Lestrade continued in a conversational tone.
"I thought we made analogies to fictional characters, why have you veered into astronomy? Are you mocking me?"
"Calm down Sherlock, by 'stars' he means singers, rock singers and pop singers." John said soothingly.
"I've got dibs on Bon Jovi!" Greg declared.
"What? That's not-" John began
"Sherlock can be Pink, since he's the one with the attitude!" Lestrade prodded on.
"Pink? Why would you assign such a horrendous color to me? What, may I implore, have you seen on my person to-"
"Dear God, please grant me the patience to keep my calm and not usher these two nut jobs out of the flat!" John prayed out loud.
"Usher isn't a rock star!" Greg protested.
"Indeed." Came Mycroft's smooth reply.
"Oh, look what the wind blew in!" Lestrade said brightly.
"Excuse me?" Mycroft was completely thrown off balance much to John and Sherlock's delight.
"Drugged." John offered as explanation, then he pointed to Sherlock "Extreme fatigue."
"Are you here to discipline Jane and Michael, Mary Poppins? They have been driving me crazy and won't listen to me while they're in the crime scene!" Lestrade complained.
"So far, this is our flat." John started.
"But it might become a crime scene very soon if you don't lie down and go to sleep!" Sherlock finished through gritted teeth.
"Woo hoo! Do you want some tea boys? I see you have company." Mrs. Hudson breezed in.
"IT'S THE MASTER!" Greg shouted.
"Oh, so what's he taken then?" Mrs. Hudson asked nonchalantly.
"The Master?" John asked incredulously, "But-"
"'It's the master' step in time, 'it's the master' step in time, never a reason-" Greg started to sing.
"Good God!" Mycroft exclaimed with an eye role, "I'll be back later." And he left.
"You boys call me if you needed a backup female vocal." Mrs. Hudson said with a chuckle as she left.
"John, why did you get so upset when Lestrade said 'the master'?"
"I thought he was making a Doctor Who reference. The Master is the villain." John explained.
"And that would make John the Doctor and you the TARDIS, Sherlock" Lestrade continued.
John giggled, "Yeah, your head is bigger in the inside Sherlock, with your mind palace and all that."
"And you never know where you'd end up with him!" Greg added happily.
"And who would you be?" Sherlock asked dryly.
"I'm one of the companions." Greg stated nonchalantly, then he added ruefully, "That's why you keep ditching me and going off on your own."
"But we always come back for you!" John told him soothingly, "Now, here's a pillow, you just-"
"Oh, I know, you're the Pinky and the Brain. Because you Sherlock are the genius and John's insane!" Lestrade said giggling.
"Excuse me?" John said incredulously.
"Come on! No one in their right minds can stand being around him for long!"
"You're around me quite often Inspector, what does that say about you?" Sherlock asked icily.
"I don't live with you!" Greg deadpanned.
John was glaring daggers. Sherlock cleared his throat. "John, are you pondering what I'm pondering?"
"I think so, Sherlock, but wouldn't we embarrass ourselves by the video as well since we're always a part of his analogies?"
Sherlock paused before starting to record, then focused on Greg, "I'll risk it."
I apologize for my muse! She goes off to god-knows-where and then when she comes back- There's a part two in store as well...
Any requests?! :D