Note from the author ****Ahhhh! I have 100+ follows for this story, ahhhh! As lame as it seems it means so much to me and thank you to each and every one of you who follow, favorite, comment, and etc. Your interaction lets me know that what I am doing is not in vain and pushes me to do more. I truly never, at all, thought anyone other than like 10 people would read this story so to see the love it's getting means a lot. Thanks again & enjoy the chapter!**** End Note
***P.S. It picks up from here, I promise****
He watched as she tossed in her unconscious state; the sight of her so unwell pained him. He used to envy her ease of sleep and would revel in the peacefulness of her nightly unconsciousness.
As a child she had slept in such an undisturbed manner it worried him, had it not been for her steady breath and the beat of her heart, he would've thought her to be dead. It was at that moment that he had only just begun to realize the vast difference between them as separate species; the girl would essentially give in to the day's exhaustion and sleep the night away to recover, while he felt no need to do so. He could stay up for days, weeks even, and he often did. It was only after having spent time in the company of his half-breed brother that he came to realize that all of the humans did this except on rare occasion. Even Inuyasha rested occasionally, admittedly it was not as often as the rest of the ningen but it was often enough to take notice and having come to understand this, Sesshomaru became more placated with Rin's daily schedule.
She was his ward after all, while she slept, he would assure no harm would come to her. The privilege of her protection was his alone, lest he set off elsewhere and leave Jaken and A-Un on guard.
As she slept, he would listen to her breathe as the night crept by soundly, as if the breaths from her lungs were expelled for the sole purpose of his hearing it; as if it were an orchestra tuned for his ears alone. The only thing that impended her breathing then was the sour habit of thumb sucking, one he'd had to covertly manage to break by removing the digit from between her lips and applying the pressure of his own hand on hers to keep her from attempting to do it again.
A privilege.
A privilege he hadn't recognized until it had been stripped away from him in the wake of her absence.
Sesshomaru picked her up gently and walked over to a tree where he sank to the ground gracefully. He laid her out and sat back against the tree to take his post.
His head rested on the rough trunk of the tree and he let out a breath.
Life without Rin had been like it always had; tiresome. It was always one thing after the other and yet its monotony was precisely what he had sought when he had first left her in the capable hands of the elderly miko.
Realistically, he knew and had known from the first day she had joined his pack that she could not stay. She was a perfect contrast to all that he knew and was, even in her youth she was the mortal among the immortal bunch, she was the sun to his moon, the light to his darkness, and the pure to his corruption. He could not hope to succeed in battling the fiercest demons and conquering the greatest lands with her by his side. It simply would not do.
Even as a mere child, she hindered him greatly and not just in the physical sense for he had all of eternity to wander the earth. She hindered him emotionally. He could not so much as swat a fly without having second thoughts about his course of action. The bloodlust he had so desperately craved had begun to dissipate in her air of forbearance and consideration. The only bloodshed he could justify before her, was that spilled in her defense.
Her beaming smile alone had lulled him into a sedated state of mind that sought to interpret the illimitable landscape of his mind. Her very presence compelled him to bring into being a path of introspection so profound that he had become admonished with himself. He'd begun to unravel and all under the enchantment of a human child who knew nothing of the world he had come to know.
Thus, it was decided swiftly after the successful hunt and defeat of Naraku, that Rin would be sent to live among her own, where she could no longer influence him so brazenly, where she would not be used as a pawn against him, where she could grow in the way that humans did; safely and unremarkably.
It had not been his intention to abandon her, no, she was after all a part of his pack. She was a most loyal vassal and represented him wherever she would go. So he had often sent her gifts of great wealth, kimonos, books, jewels, rare plants; something he knew she would love and would make every effort to care for. He had even often allowed Jaken and A-Un to spend time with her every few moons or so; after all they were the only pack she knew.
Though as time passed, like it always had, he had simply lost track of time. Matters of conquest and power became more pressing. The obligations and responsibilities of his late father had fallen to him and he'd returned to the castle to establish a new rule his own. The legitimate transition of power was still just that; transitioning. It was a slow process but one he had come to expect, truly he had just only begun to fill the position when the pressing opposition from the ogre demons had come about.
All other lands, lords, and tribes had submitted in an unprovoked manner. His reputation of ruthlessness had proceeded him and with an army now at his disposal, fighting would be futile. Yet it would be unlike his life, if all had gone according to plan, because for some reason unbeknownst to anyone, the ogre demons refused to submit to his leniency and as the first real uprising leading towards war under his rule; he had to dispatch them.
He could've sent a small battalion, yes, that would have been so much easier but like any commander in chief, he knew respect from his army would have to be earned. These were the men and seed of men that had served his sire. Hearsay would not do, they would need to bare witness to his power and resolve before they conceded their alliance to him and this he understood. After all he had been a foot soldier briefly during his sire's reign and though he had always had an awesome respect for his father, hearing the stories of war and seeing him come back with either the bodies of his enemies or the riches of their enemies, were two separate things.
So he found himself alone, which he preferred, in pursuit of the ogre demon tribe….a full ten years after he had last seen a gap tooth, bright eyed, and rambunctious Rin.
The monotony he had so craved in order to escape her influence had not been what he could have foreseen but it had done the job, it had severed their ties from one another and yet….
He looked over at the small woman. Her breathing now, though better than it was last night, was still heavy, labored, and occasionally hitched. As she no longer wheezed, the sound was melodic to his sensitive ears, the sound sang alongside the steady beat of her heart.
She was healing slowly but surely, and he found that this fact helped him breathe easier too. As he'd fed her the water over the course of the night, he'd collected trace amounts of his dokkasō from within his mouth and mixed it with the water enough so that it was still soft enough for her to drink with his aid.
His dokkasō though poisonous to all when in his true form, was the very substance that healed him without haste in his humanoid form. It was, what he considered, his strongest weapon. A day or two's rest allowed for it to catalyze the immune system and heal even the most life-threatening of injuries.
Admittedly he wasn't sure how the toxins would take to her system, after all it was a demon salve. As she grew under his supervision, he'd heal the occasional bruise or scape by simply by licking the area clean and allowing his dokkasō to do the rest but he'd never in all the years of his long life heard of it being used to heal another beings' internal structure and he certainly never imagine he'd be attempting it with his former ward.
Yet, and it wounded him to come the stark realization, he'd been desperate.
Desperate.
It had seemed obvious then that their bond had been anything but severed, that the reach of her influence had been more encompassing than he had realized.
For he could not let her die, he would not let her die, he'd be damned if he allowed her to abandon him. It simply could not be.
It was so ironic, pathetically ironic, that he the merciless killing perfection was now trying to keep the insubordinate woman alive. He was no fool, no, not by a long shot. He knew it was not he but the youkai within him that refused to let her die and that alone should have been enough reason for him to let her die but with what little cares he possessed in the world, if Rin; particularly an enigmatic Rin was not among them, then it would be for nought.
He was a complex creature and this he knew. He sought unrivaled power and yet knew it could not keep him sated for long but Rin who had been by his side for so long, had done just that and more when she returned a puzzle.
What vexed him to no end was not understanding her place in his pack, he knew anything that his youkai cared for was inevitably a weakness; something to be used against him.
The Rin he knew was relentlessly kind, always seeking to shine her light on every situation and circumstance as if she were blinded to darkness. This Rin was clearly no stranger to the darkness, her naivete had been stripped from her through hardship it had seemed and he could not fathom how she could have strayed so far from what she was.
Or perhaps he thought, and this was a thought he had refused to acknowledge since he had caught her scent, perhaps she had simply grown into the truest version of herself; brilliant, eagle-eyed, and shrewd. The strain between them was only natural now because where she had been blinded to his faults, she could now see and be repulsed by; like everyone else.
He let out a disgruntled 'hmph' and turned to face her again as the moon began its subtle descent from the night time sky, indicating that morning was bout a few hours away.
He felt his features pull into a mask of momentary shock, as a most intoxicating scent inveigled him.
He inhaled deeply before he could think better of it and felt his insides clench cruelly.
Rin.
She smelled of him, more than usual, enough to buzz his senses in an acute euphoria that he couldn't turn away from. The scent was amorous and seductive; he felt his eyes flutter close as he took in the scent again. His youkai pulsed within him and he had no doubt that if he opened his eyes now, they'd be a blood red.
So this was what the beast craved, what it yearned for. It lusted after her shamelessly.
Sesshomaru felt his claws dig into the earth beside him, he was not surprised. He was no fool, he had thought this a possibility but had brushed it off. her beauty could not make up for what she robbed him of, the Rin he had known, and her lack of submission had only rebuffed the thought more but blood….the sweet smell of blood never lied.
It smelled of her and him, it smelled of his lust and her ripened fertility, and had it not been for the lingering acidic scent of posion and salty tears, he could have basked in the scent all night.
Yes. He knew the broken man was awake. He could feel his eyes on him as he sat beside his ward but the man could not move and did not speak. He only wept.
Sesshomaru rolled his golden eyes. It seemed the man was broken in more than one way.
"You were once a broken man in the woods." She breathed.
His eyes narrowed at the memory. The rage he'd felt in that moment was incomparable to anything he'd ever felt towards her, had it been ANYONE else he would have crushed their throat, ripped out their heart, and melted it with his dokkasō.
But it was Rin, Rin who he could not kill and would not let die, instead he threw her to the ground and seethed, flattening out a quarter of the surrounding forestry in his rage and then sitting and watching as she worked. He thought to wait until she had finished piecing him back together to kill him, in order to crush her spirit but he thought better of it.
Perhaps that was her influence too.
What a vexation.
The broken man smelt of herbs, muck, fear, and tears. He could feel the soft brown eyes make their way from him to Rin and could already scent the turmoil that took place in the fallen slayer. It seemed that he resolved on feeling enamored with his ward.
He let go of yet another sigh.
She seemed to attract every male entity towards her like a beacon of light in the darkness.
He glanced her over again, slowly. He frowned, the clothes she wore clung to her every curve and muscle to allow for optimal movement and flexibility; he knew this but he couldn't help but feel it was another form of rebellion. He did not expect a slayer to wear full length, regal, or weighted kimonos but this certainly did not help her cause in warding off unwanted suitors.
And at that he would've scoffed, but he didn't, after all he was no different it seemed. For he was well aware of the fact that the youkai in him yearned to taste her in more ways than one, even now his senses refused to ignore the fact that she smelled of him but unlike the rest he would not allow his bodily charge to determine his actions.
As if on cue his head throbbed with a thudding and numbing pain that enticed him to close his eyes and rest if only for a moment.
Yun watched as the demon closed his eyes to rest, after nearly an hour, he was certain he was asleep. It was now or never.
He gritted his teeth and pushed himself off the ground silently and pulling his body with a renewed determination towards the female slayer, all the while watching the demon. The fire still flickered over her features as he rested over her and caught his breath.
He reached beneath her armpits and began to pull her towards him to no avail. He would have to stand for this, he'd have to be able to move own his own accord. He glanced back at the demon with his eyes closed and back at the young woman whose beauty, even in the darkness, overwhelmed him with warmth.
He gently removed an offending lock of raven hair from her face and caressed her cheek with his calloused hands. He froze when her features bunched together in acute discomfort and her hand came up to rest upon his.
Her eyelids fluttered about until they finally revealed her burnished brown eyes. She slowly looked over at her hand on his and back at him in mild confusion before letting out a bloodcurdling scream.
"NO!"