The dinner on Xollin's secluded terrace was something very different for Tara. She wasn't used to all that comfort, and mostly not used to him. Her earlier conversation with Master Clarisse came into her mind and she asked herself if it was the right thing to do or not. Being so close to Xollin again, made her have doubts. The light conversation, the jokes, the laughter made her relax, but when they moved on the bench inside the small gazebo, she became once again aware of the reality. Her change was obvious and Xollin got worried, he could sense she was hiding something, but he didn't know what. More than once he was tempted to take at least a peek inside her mind, but without her permission it felt wrong. He opted for talking it out, whatever it was.

"Tara, what is going on?" came his sudden question and she looked at him half scared, half ashamed.

"I should go. It's getting late and…" she tried to get out and avoid answering him.

"Does this have anything to do with what happened between us the other night? You have been avoiding me since we returned," insisted Xollin and pulled her closer to him.

She didn't answer, just nodded slightly and Xollin felt his heart stop.

"Do you regret it?"

"No," she answered this time right away looking at him for a second, but then she let her head down again. "I just didn't think I would live beyond that night," she added.

"You regret that you are still alive? I don't understand."

"If I knew I was going to live, I would have never asked you to…I…I would have not done what I did. I was scared," she tried to explain him, but to Xollin it didn't make much sense. "I have asked Master Clarisse today to help me find a place."

"You want to move out of the base?"

"I want to move out of…Odessen."

"Why?"

His insistence was killing her, she didn't know how to tell him, she was so ashamed.

"I thought it would be better if I just go somewhere else."

"Better for whom?" Xollin's tone this time was harsher and she was running out of ways to avoid a straight answer.

"For you, of course," Tara answered without any hesitation.

"And how do you figure that?"

"You said that your heart has been …displaced. I don't want you to feel…obligated," she tried to explain, but she could hardly find her words.

"Obligated? Did you think about asking me first? You know, before making assumptions."

"No…I am so ashamed Master, I don't know how to even talk to you now. I don't know how I should act around you. I am…I am sorry that I asked you to do something you wouldn't …" her fragmented explanations whispered with tears in her eyes finally made sense and Xollin wrapped his arms around her body, pressing her head on his chest and surprising her.

"I am glad you did. At least we were near the bed. If you hadn't I would have come to you and that couch was kind of small," he whispered her smiling and Tara looked up into his eyes the same second.

"Master…" she started and he interrupted her.

"Xollin."

"What are you saying?" she continued her question.

Xollin held her face up, towards him and gazed deep into her eyes. She saw again those silver tiny lights in them. His eyes were suddenly so full of life.

"If you had not asked me to kiss you that night, I would have. I know you have been attracted to me since first time we met, on Belsavis. I didn't think it was appropriate, you were so young. These last months, when you have been away I just…I realized that I have feelings for you. I know I said I can't offer you much, that my heart is not in the right place, but that night, you…You have changed everything. Now I know exactly what I want, I know where my heart is…You have it, Tara."

She just looked at him, hardly breathing, her heart was beating so fast that she thought it would jump out of her chest. She couldn't believe that the man she loved all this time was telling her he had feelings for her. It seemed so unreal.

"Please don't joke with me, Master…' she heard her own voice surprised, she thought she only thought of it.

"I am not Tara. I love you."

The next second Xollin's lips touched hers but she just stood there, still not believing that it was real, that he just told her he loved her. Xollin pulled back and broke the kiss noticing she was still in shock.

"I am sorry if I am moving too fast, but…"

"I love you too," she whispered and wrapping her arms around his neck, she kissed him.

The sound of the water in the small fountain that was half way between his house and his parents' traveled into the silent night to them. Some beasts, somewhere in the distance roared, and a light breeze brought them the scent of the flowers that were everywhere. Tara couldn't hear anything, see anything. Her mind was full with him, all her senses connected to Xollin. What she did feel were his arms, around her, then lifting her up, his kisses, his whispers, the soft sheets against her skin...

"I was thinking…Since you seem to want to move," spoke Xollin first after they had somewhat recovered from the passion they shared. "Would you consider moving here?"

Tara was still lying almost on top of him, her head on his chest, while her fingers were playing absently with a few of his braids. "Here…" she whispered still absorbed with what she was feeling, rather than what he had just asked.

"Yes. It is more comfortable than that small apartment of yours," insisted Xollin noticing how absent she looked, amused with her reactions.

Suddenly Tara realized what he had asked and almost jumped out of bed.

"I can't do that. What are people going to…"she panicked.

"Who cares? I want to spend all the time we can together. I want you here, with me, every day…" he continued pulling her back into his arms.

Suddenly Tara felt a surge in the force, something she had never experienced before. Felt like a wave of desire had taken over the world. She looked alarmed at Xollin and asked him in a whisper "Did you feel that?"

"Feel what?" he answered with a question, but immediately tuning his senses.

"It was something in the force…" she whispered again, but right away she was interrupted by his laugh. "Do you know what it was?" she insisted seeing his reaction.

"Yes. That was…My parents…" he whispered her and smiled with a playful light in his eyes.

"Your parents? Master Clarisse and Darth Hellix…"

Xollin started to laugh again seeing her confusion. "Yes, what can I say, I have…very loving parents," he tried to explain to her still smiling and she finally understood his undertone. "I will teach you how to block them. I have been doing it since I was a kid. It's like a second nature to me," added Xollin and kissed her pulling her under him.

"Maybe some other time. They are rather…inspiring…" whispered Tara, and she abandoned herself again in his arms, under his kisses.

At Xollin's insistence Tara stayed that night with him and promised she will think about moving, she just needed some more time.

~~#~~

There was no laughter or conversation for Arria's dinner. She had dinner alone, and then she rushed to take a shower. Unlike the previous day, she had towels close by just in case and a nighty waiting for her. This time there were no surprises and Arcann didn't interrupt her, didn't surprise her with any of his sudden intrusions. She took the time alone to think, and the terrace attracted her again after she pulled on a long silk robe. It was late, but she didn't feel tired, her mind was working overtime and she was sitting on one of the couches, looking at the stars when Arcann finally joined her. He kept his distance on purpose, he wanted to let everything he told her earlier that day sink in. He needed time alone too, he'd been planning a few things and a surprise for her. Seeing her cry, suffer, feeling her pain made him want to see her smile, to see her happy…even if for him the word 'happy' was still just a word. He seen others being happy, but never experienced it for himself. All he knew about being happy was that it was what everyone wanted, what every single person was aspiring to achieve, the opposite of 'unhappy'. It was when pain, fear, anger, all disappeared and an overwhelming feel of good was taking over. He was looking forward to experiencing all that one day…

He'd been thinking for hours how to make her smile, how to take away from her all the pain. He was strong enough to endure almost anything, but she was so fragile, even if she had proven in the past to be a worthy adversary, he didn't want her to suffer. Her pain was hurting him even more than his own. He finally found the way that he thought would make her smile…Free her parents. His plan was to free them the day after their wedding. It was going to be the first gift to her, his first step into making her happy. But it had to be a surprise. He remembered reading somewhere that surprises increase the magnitude of feelings, and he wanted her to feel everything at the utmost. After another quiet, long look at her he took off his mask, and put his lightsaber away, in the safe, joining her in the now dark garden. The scent of jasmine assaulted his senses the second he stepped out and went to sit beside her, with a deep sigh.

"Do you still hate me?" came his question and looked at her. He wanted to see her reactions, not just sense them. Her eyes were so expressive, green, and…absolutely incredible.

"What do you think?" Arria answered with a question and she looked at him.

"I was hoping you would understand…I have bared my heart in front of you."

"You might've had a miserable life, but that doesn't mean you have to make mine just as miserable…You are still forcing me to marry you, you are still holding my parents hostage, you've been doing it for the past five years…Do you have any idea how much I've missed them? How much I needed them?" she started to ask him, but saw the indifferent look in his eyes and wondered if was just talking to a wall.

"I am not the right person to ask those questions. I do not miss my father and I have never even known my mother…It is not fair…"

Arria let out a deep breath that she had been holding without even noticing. He had a point, but that was not her problem. Or at least she tried to convince herself of that.

"I am getting tired…Good night," she said suddenly and walked away from him.

Arcann fought his own impulse of going after her, but rationality won. If he had, they would have probably gotten into another fight, make her hurt even more. He preferred to be the one suffering… She didn't believe me, or she doesn't care…Not sure which is worse. Ria…She holds the key to everything, she is the only one that could ever make me happy, whole. I can't let her go.

Arria rushed to get into the bed and turned her back to the side where she knew he would be sooner or later. In the silent and dark room she literally cried herself to sleep that night. At least she managed to fall asleep before he came to bed, about an hour later.

Arcann went to sleep without disturbing her. He had no idea for how long he was asleep when he woke up. Something was odd, he felt a light tickle on his chest and opened his eyes the very same second. Somehow, in her sleep Arria rolled in his arms, her head on his shoulder, and her left hand was on his chest. Her long, black hair was what tickled him, and he brushed away gently the few strands that were covering her face and part of his chest. A smile tugged at the corner of his lips and continued to look at her. He gently enclosed her body in his arms, and Arria moved slightly, making herself more comfortable. She had no idea…For the first time he wished he had his arm, and the idea of reconstructive surgery wasn't so bad anymore. The cybernetic arm, with all the sensors couldn't feel her soft skin…With his right hand he touched the side of her face, the tiny spot on her neck where he felt her even pulse, and desire overwhelmed him. He stopped touching her, he didn't want to wake her up, she would have been scared and run away from him, from his arms. Arcann just took a deep breath and closed his eyes, emerging himself in all those new sensations. It was the first time he slept with a woman in his arms…Her warm, even breath sent waves of heat in his whole body, igniting a raging inferno. Her touch was burning his skin and it felt so good…Is this how happy feels? If she knew she would probably run in the other room…She still thinks I am a monster. How can I prove her wrong? I have told her the truth and she still doesn't want me. I will find a way. After tomorrow…

The artificial morning light woke Arria up next day, and as soon as she opened her eyes she realized where she was. She'd been sleeping in his arms…Arcann was still asleep and she pulled back and away from him without a sound, slowly, afraid that he will wake up and see her. She made it back to her side of the bed and she got up, walking out of the bedroom. The second she closed the door, Arcann opened his eyes. She thinks I don't know…Should I tell her that I do? Or that would make things worse? He decided not to and got himself out of the comfortable bed. It was the day of their wedding.

"I hope you rested well. It will be a rather long day," he spoke joining her for breakfast, before they would both start to get ready for the ceremony.

Arria kept quiet, just nodded slightly. Darn you. Yes, I slept well…In your arms…I will die before I admit that, she thought and continued to eat her toast. Arcann just looked at her and started on his own breakfast. He could sense her discomfort, and changed the subject.

"After the ceremony we will spend the rest of the day together. Tomorrow I have a surprise for you, and after that we will leave for our honeymoon."

Again, Arria didn't say a word. She already knew it wasn't going to happen, and this time she bit from a piece of fruit looking somewhere outside the window.

"Do you have any questions?" he insisted surprised by her silence. Normally she would be already arguing with him, or insulting him…

"When do I get my lightsabers back?" she asked, unable to keep quiet any longer.

His laugh filled the room and she looked at him through squinted eyes. She wished she had them that second, to wipe that smile he kept on his face after he was done laughing.

"Not for a while," came his answer short and Arria didn't shy away from showing him she wasn't happy about it.

"You are afraid I am going to kill you. Is that why you took them away from me?"

"You will be my princess. You will not need them anymore. I will protect you…" he started to explain, but she interrupted him with a new attack.

"And who is going to protect me against you?"

Arria asked her question and without waiting for an answer she got up and left the room leaving him alone, to finish his breakfast. Sadness took over him, she seemed to think she needed protection against him. She would still think he would hurt her. Anger made a presence and he threw the table upside down a few feet away, rising on his feet. His eyes were still glowing bright orange when he went to get ready for the ceremony. With half of his clothes on, Arcann tried to calm down by slowly wrapping the soft white fabric on his right hand. The earlier argument still on his mind, he was trying to understand, to understand her logic. Suddenly, ignoring that he didn't even had a shirt on, he rushed to her dressing room and opened the door wide, scaring the servants helping Arria.

"Everyone out," he ordered and in a second they all rushed out leaving them alone.

Arcann closed the door and advanced into the room. She was already dressed…She is so beautiful…

"What the hell you think you're doing?" she questioned him turning around furious.

"Do you really think I would ever hurt you?"

"You already have," answered Arria squinting her eyes again. "And you are right now," she added.

"Right now?" he asked confused and got close to her.

Arria wished she could have ignored him that she wouldn't look at him, at that body wrapped in hard muscles, the slightly tanned skin…Darn it. Even the scars look good on him…Maybe I should give him a few more. She just took a couple of steps back.

"Yes, right now. How do you think I feel when you're forcing me to marry you?"

"Would you do it on your own will?" he asked getting closer to her.

"Hell no!" she answered this time confronting him.

To her surprise he only hesitated a few seconds, then turned around and left her room without any other word. Arria just looked at him walk away, at the broad shoulders, the way every muscle was getting tense, then relaxed…I am losing it…I have to get the hell out of here. She thought and the next moment the servants came back into the room.

With only minutes left until the ceremony, Arria looked into the oversized mirror. She looked just like in her dream, she even recognized the dress. The stretch lace hugging her body, the long train, even the veil was the same…She looked again at the hair done in an elaborate mix of jewels and fresh scented jasmine flowers. It was beautiful, and she smiled at her own reflection. The strapless, sweetheart dress made her look somehow smaller, and Arria thought of her mother. Two big tears appeared in her eyes and she wiped them quickly. I promise I will free you mom…You too dad, I swear! she thought and looked surprised at the door when one of the servants came in to tell her it was time.

~~#~~

They had just jumped to hyperspace, when Leo'Ren let Vonn take over the flying and he went into the main room where Xollin was. Found him unexpectedly smiling and just looked at him for a few seconds before speaking.

"I see you had a good night."

Xollin didn't even seemed to hear him, but he answered without hesitation.

"The best one yet."

"Does Tara have anything to do with it?" he insisted remembering her in the spaceport. She was behind a few crates, pretending she was busy, but Leo'Ren wasn't that easy to fool. The force flow between her and his cousin, their emotions, were filling the air around. He noticed the exchange of looks between them. There was intimacy, shyness, hope, promise, all together.

"She has everything to do with it. I can't believe how blind I have been all this time," Xollin's answer interrupted Leo'Ren and he sat across from his cousin.

"What about Vaylin? Did you give up on her?"

Xollin got on his feet and started to pace quietly. He had been asking himself the same question. There was no doubt, he loved Tara, but there was also something about Vaylin that was making him uncomfortable, a guilt that he didn't expect.

"Vaylin was passion, burning like a big hot flame. Tara is more like a constant fire, that is burning day and night…It is so different…" he tried to explain.

"Are you saying that there is no passion between you and Tara?" asked Leo'Ren confused.

"No. There is passion, but there is so much more than just that…It's hard to explain. I am still thinking that the danger was what attracted me to Vaylin from the start, the fact that it was an impossible future. I still wish she could be freed, she deserves that, but Tara is where my heart is. It has been some time since I thought that my feelings for Vaylin were strong enough to make it through anything, to break her free…Even if she would be free, herself, I would still be with Tara. Tara is just so…perfect. Perfect for me, soothes my heart and my mind, but ignites my body. She makes me feel so alive, so complete."

Leo'Ren listened to his friend, then let his own mind wondered for a while. "Sounds like you have found your girl."

"I did. I have no doubt that she is the one for me," confirmed Xollin and for the first time that day looked carefully at his cousin.

"Well, in that case hold on to her," whispered Leo'Ren and walked to the holoterminal, opening a few maps on the screens.

"Unlike you?" insisted Xollin.

"We should go over our plan one more time. We will be landing on Zakuul in less than an hour," continued Leo'Ren ignoring the last question.

"Leo…" tried Xollin again and this time his friend just stared at him with gold, but empty eyes.

"I am happy for you, I really am. Let's just leave it at that. We are not here to discuss me."

Xollin let out a sigh. He knew better than anyone how much Leo'Ren was suffering, his agony…As much as he had been insisting for him to at least look for Lyla he couldn't convince him. He was always cutting him out, change the subject or literally walking away. Xollin knew they had a mission, one of the most important ones ever. Arria's life was in their hands and he concentrated on that, knowing in back of his mind that Tara was going to wait for him later that day, when they will be back.

~~#~~

Arria started to walk towards the throne room after she came out of the quick travel. The guards were lined up on either side of the long corridor leading to the room, and she thought of the escape plan she hoped her brother had. One quick glance over her right shoulder assured her that his ship was docked there, she saw it near the quick travel, and she hoped it was a good spot. The small spheres were buzzing around her and Arria knew they were cameras. The whole galaxy was going to watch the ceremony. She was suddenly nervous, but there wasn't anything she could do about it now. For a few seconds she fantasized about having her lightsabers and killing Arcann live, in front of everyone. She wouldn't even care about consequences as long as her parents were safe. But with his death, would they be? Would Vaylin take the throne and kill her parents? She wasn't sure and she didn't have her lightsabers anyway, so she just continued to walk, getting closer and closer to the huge opened double doors to the throne room. She had only been in that room once before, that first time when she met Arcann. When he overpowered her in every possible way, when he pinned her to that wall, when she saw for the first time that his eyes were turquoise, when he touched her for the first time. She felt a shiver though her body. Arria felt next her heart beats rushing and she took a deep breath, trying to control them. She looked ahead, and she stopped for a few seconds in the wide doorway. Vaylin was right beside her brother, at his left side, with her usual charcoal armor. Arcann was wearing just like in her dream, all white armor, even his mask was a different one than usual. Who cares? This is a fake marriage. I do not recognize the Empire of Zakuul as legit, therefor the marriage is not legit… even if that old man looks legit, continued Arria with her thoughts while glancing at the older looking official. He looked like one of the so called scions, some visionaries. They were respected and held in high regard by everyone, they were the ones having visions, using the force and fighting for destinies to be fulfilled. On the opposite side of the official, Arria saw her brother and even if she was still far from him, she smiled his way. His black leather long robes were stretched over his massive body. From where she was, she couldn't help herself compare him with Arcann. It looked like Arcann was probably an inch taller, but just as wide, and she felt his power again, just as every time she was in his presence. Her brother's gold eyes were looking at her, just as empty as they have been in the last year. She missed seeing him smile. Moments from their childhood came into her mind, they were so happy…Their parents were happy, always laughing with them, smile at each other, touch each other every chance they had. That was true, pure love, something that Arria always doubted she will experience. Walking down the path to the throne, to marry Arcann was becoming more real for her, the arranged fake marriage was nothing like she dreamed she might have one day. She was Sith, for her marriage would have been taking lifetime vows in front of fire and ice fountains, with the man she loved. Not this…

From his spot Arcann had been watching her every step, every move, and reached to the force to feel her emotions. To his surprise there weren't any…most of the time, anyways…He sensed some emotions when she remembered her first visit in the throne room, then some more when childhood memories came to her…Except the couple of spikes, the rest of the time all he could feel was sadness, and resignation. She is so incredibly beautiful. If she would just stop hating me…maybe tomorrow, when I am going to free her parents .In time she will realize that I love her, that I would not hurt her. She has to. I have the right to be happy just like anyone else. She cannot deny that to me. But at what price? Am I making a mistake forcing her to marry me? No. There is no other way. She is my destiny whether she sees it or not. Arria was almost half way to him when he saw her looking at her brother, and he looked at him too. He already knew he was powerful, he already had saved his life once, back on Tresen…He could have let him die, but he didn't. Arcann surprised himself realizing he respected the man beside him. The silver dust of hair on his head was contrasting with the darker tanned skin, covering some of the scars. His golden eyes were surprisingly empty, just like the last time he saw him and Arcann wondered why is that, what had happened to him that took away any life in them. Even if Darth Athran was controlling his emotions well, anger, pain, rage seemed to be always present in him. We might have more in common than I thought. I wonder what happened to him, what is the source of everything…He can't even smile at his sister. Neither can I… continued Arcann his thoughts and glanced at his sister. She just looked just as bored as always. There were no emotions coming from her. Another spike in Arria's emotions attracted his attention and he fixated his eyes on her.

Arria was almost to the throne, only steps away and for just one short second she remembered how she woke up that morning…In his arms…She didn't remember how she got there in the first place, but she remembered how good it felt. His cybernetic arm didn't even bother her in spite of the fact she always thought it would, that it would be …uncomfortable. His body was just as hard as that arm and still, she slept so good…

Arria finally got to where she stopped, and after another smile to her brother he nodded slightly to her. Next she turned to face Arcann and even if she had been avoiding even looking at him, now they were face to face. Well, almost, she was about a foot shorter, but she looked up to him. His bright orange eye was insistently searching for hers, and she knew that from behind his mask he was probably smiling satisfied. She was wrong, behind his mask, Arcann was sad, worried about how unhappy she looked, how sad she felt. The ceremony started and she couldn't even hear what the official was saying, she didn't care. She almost ran when Arcann took her hand and put the ring on her finger. She looked at him with tears in her eyes, and heard him say 'I do', saw the way he looked at her and involuntarily she started to shake. Arcann felt her tremor, her high emotions, but were the wrong emotions…It was her turn to answer to the questions the official was asking her and she did it without even thinking, she had promised herself not to let any of what was happening affect her. Her 'I do" was next and they were declared husband and wife by the law of Zakuul.

Arcann forehead touched hers and she heard him whisper in a low voice that only she could hear:

"You are my wife now. Mine…"