Sansa awoke to the sound of thunder in the distance. The air blowing in through her open doors was freshening and brushed away the last remnants of sleepiness. Still in her thin night robes she strode onto her balcony and leaned against the railing. She looked toward the sea and saw an imposing storm was blowing in. The blue water had turned shades of dark blue and gray, and the waves were high and rolling fitfully.
The strong wind chilled her, and the goose bumps rose on her bare arms. She shivered as she looked upon the stormy horizon, but more from a feeling in her gut than from the chill.
Arya, whom had spent the night on a divan in Sansa's chambers suddenly appeared beside her sister. Sansa was startled at her sister's sudden presence, but smiled when she saw it was Arya.
"Oh, it is you. I had nearly forgotten you were here. I have such wonderful dreams sometimes, about our family. The dreams always seem so real, but I wake to the truth all too soon." Sansa explained, her voice groggy sounding still. She reached over and took her sister's hand and squeezed it and whispered in a happy tone, "But you are here now, and this is real."
The sisters stood holding hands and looking out towards the approaching storm, and Sansa felt sure that with Arya, strong and resilient Arya, at her side she could face whatever came with more strength and certainty.
"This storm is giving me a bad feeling...like something bad is going to happen." Sansa whispered.
"Bad things have been happening since we were but children." Arya replied dryly.
Sansa smiled and looked at her younger sister, "Technically we are both still children."
Arya withdrew her hand and looked at Sansa with hard eyes and said firmly, "No Sansa, we are not children. No more lullabies and fairytales for us...we have seen war and death, and if we ever want to see home again we are likely to witness many more bad things before we know any good."
"You are here, and that is good." Sansa responded, forcing a dim smile.
"Is it? Have you learned nothing Sansa? When you have something or someone dear to you, it is a weakness, it can be threatened or used against you." Arya murmured solemnly.
Sansa placed a comforting hand on Arya's shoulder and said happily, "We are with Queen Daenerys now, the Mother of Dragons, Arya! She will not let anyone harm us."
"You are putting your faith in another fairytale Sansa. From what I have heard she can't control her dragons, and has lost control of the cities she took...and they aren't happy with her. Her enemies are growing in number everywhere she goes. She may have good intentions, but I don't know if anyone that stands beside her is safe at all." Arya retorted.
Sansa was about to reassure her sister that her doubts were unfounded, and she would soon feel safe here. But a young handmaiden entered the room suddenly, throwing the doors open and hurrying in. Arya and Sansa whirled around to look upon the intruder. The young servant looked at Arya in question, then turned her attention to Sansa.
"Milady Sansa, the Queen sent me to get you. Your handmaiden is entering labor and she wants you to be there." The young servant gushed breathlessly, Sansa nodded and followed the servant from the room, Arya trailing awkwardly behind.
As they neared Shae's chambers Sansa heard her friend cry out from within. Sansa entered the room and was hit by a wave of heat. The doors to Shae's balcony had been shut, and braziers lit, to keep Shae warm, and the baby, when it arrived.
Daenerys, who stood by the foot of Shae's bed, turned to Sansa when she entered. The Queen's face was cool and composed, and she stated in a serious tone, "Shae's waters broke earlier this morning, the pains growing greater. She was pacing the floor until she could no longer bear it."
Shae cried out from the bed where she lay in a nest of twisted sheets. Sansa had never before witnessed child birth, and the scene before her looked horrific. The storm outside made the room dark, the only light the flickering flames in the braziers, and Shae screaming and writhing on the bed.
Daenerys saw the worry on her friend's face and said softly as she gestured to the other people in the room, "Do not fear, she has the best of care." Sansa nodded and then moved to Shae's bedside, and Dany now saw Arya, whom had been blocked from view by Sansa. Dany cocked her head to one side and arched her brows in question at the disheveled child.
Arya stepped forward into the halo of dancing light the braziers gave off, and she said, "I am Arya Stark."
Dany's violet eyes grew large in surprise and disbelief. Shae gave another earsplitting cry and Dany glanced from the people crowded around the bed to the new Stark girl who stood before her. "Let us leave here and have a talk." Dany said to Arya, she glanced back at Shae and Sansa one last time before she strode from the room, Arya following.
When the wave of pain receded Shae was left panting breathlessly in it's wake. She looked up at Sansa and smiled in relief. She reached up and Sansa immediately grasped her hand, looking down at her with her pale pallor and her mouth set in a grim line, her eyes full of worry. Shae managed a chuckle and said softly, "Sansa, I am the one having the baby here, you need not look so grim. Spout encouragement, and smile...this is a miracle, so I have heard."
Sansa squeezed her friend's sweaty hand and forced a bright smile before saying cheerfully, "Of course it is!" But in her mind she heard Arya's warning 'When you have something or someone dear to you it is a weakness, it can be threatened or used against you.' And this was Tyrion's child...a Lannister.
If Shae saw the worry on Sansa's face she had no time to comment on it, for another wave of pain was upon her, causing her to grip Sansa's hand painfully as a scream tore raggedly from her throat. A healer knelt and checked Shae then stood and moved away, joining the two other women in the room, her assistants Sansa guessed. This was an area of life Sansa knew nothing about, but she found it odd that the woman had not given Shae any news, like that it would be over soon, or was going well. She felt that stab in her stomach as she had earlier this morning while watching the storm approaching. She heard the booming of the thunder outside over Shae's heavy breathing and panting.
Sansa stood by, letting Shae squeeze her hand as hard as she needed to. She was thankful she was standing near Shae's head and therefore could not see what was going on down on the business end. But even so she felt dizzy and queasy, and guilty for feeling that way. Shae was so pale, and covered in a sheen of sweat. When a contraction came on Shae found the strength to lift her shoulders off of the bed and bear down as she screamed or cried out in agony, but when the contraction was done she collapsed back to the sweat dampened sheets and would speak to Sansa, seeming to barely have the energy to form words. And even more alarmingly the words often made little sense.
"Such pain Sansa...I have felt much pain...but this is different. Good pain, this...when it's over all will be...alright." Shae said, then she rolled her head to the other side and closed her eyes, a soft smile curving her lips and she seemed to sleep for a few precious moments before another wave of pain crashed down upon her. When the pain ebbed she looked to Sansa again and smiled, saying, "I see them Sansa...pearls...so precious and pure." She held up her other hand, it was closed around something small, and she opened it. Sansa leaned over and saw the pearl that a sailor had given to Shae on the boat that had brought them here.
"Isn't it so tiny and perfect?" Shae asked, her voice sounded as if it was echoing from some far away plane of existence, and it made Sansa's stomach muscles clench. But Sansa nodded and smiled at Shae saying, "It is lovely."
Another contraction took hold of Shae and she clenched the pearl in her hand again. As the healer came back to Shae Sansa made eye contact with her, giving her a worried look, the healer's face remained impassive. Sansa wanted to ask if everything was ok...if all was going as it should, but if things were going a little rough, or badly even then Sansa did not want Shae hearing it. No Shae needed to stay strong and keep believing it was going to be ok.
"Tyrion...he gave me the one thing I always feared I would have, many times long before I met him. He gave me the best thing...but he doesn't even know it." Shae whimpered, a tear trickling down her face, followed by several more.
Sansa squeezed her friend's hand and said, "No Shae, don't think like that. Just think how happy he will be when he finds out, when he sees his child...and you."
And then it all happened so fast. The healer called out that she saw the head, the other healers scurried over to the one kneeling before Shae. And after several contractions that crammed themselves close together, robbing Shae of more strength, the baby slipped into the world. And there was an ethereal silence as the healers set about cleaning the baby and tending Shae. Then the baby cried, it was only a moment after it's entrance into the world before it cried, but it was as if the whole world had paused, and all of creation was holding it's breath, waiting for the baby to cry it's first cry. With eyes brimming with tears Sansa looked to Shae as the baby cried, and the tears of happiness over the baby turned to tears of worry for the mother. Shae turned her head weakly in the direction of the baby, being swaddled now, she smiled faintly as she took in the sight of her child.
The healer who had cleaned and swaddled the baby brought her over to Shae slowly, and gently leaned down, placing the precious infant in her mother's arms. "It's a girl." The healer announced as she carefully drew her arms from under the baby. Shae caressed her daughter's face weakly and murmured, "My precious pearl...dearest jewel of my life."
The awe full moments of bonding were gently disturbed by one of the healers who helped Shae sit up and position the baby for it's first feeding. Shae watched her baby nurse from her, joy shining from her pale face.
The healer who had delivered the baby had still been kneeling down, examining Shae, though the mother was oblivious to all but her child. The healer stood up and moved, reaching down and beginning to vigorously rub Shae's abdomen. Though Shae didn't seem to notice any of this Sansa did, and even from this angle near the head of the bed her attention was caught by a swiftly seeping pool of blood on the sheets.
And the bubble of joy that had surrounded them popped. The healer women drew together and examined Shae. Sansa looked at the blood in horror, but when she turned to her friend she found Shae was not in the state one might expect. Shae knew something was amiss as she glanced down at the healers, but she drew her child closer to her, holding her tighter, as if the force of this sacred embrace could ward off what was to come for a few more moments. But Shae was even paler now than she had been a moment ago, when Sansa had looked away and saw the blood.
Sansa looked from her friend to the healers who were now standing at the foot of the bed looking at Shae helplessly.
"Is there nothing?" Sansa managed to get out in a tight whisper despite her suddenly dry mouth and throat. The healers shook their heads in unison. Shae sank back into the pillows, and gazed in awe at her child. Sansa sat down on the bed next to her friend and fought the tears that threatened to come flooding forth, these moments were Shae's last...she must not spoil them for her.
Carefully Shae pulled one arm free of her baby, still holding her close in her other arm. She held her arm out and when Sansa reached out she dropped the glistening pearl into Sansa's palm.
"I do not need it now, I have my true Pearl. Please keep it for her, it is the only fine thing I have to leave her." Shae murmured, tears glistening in her eyes. Sansa closed her hand around the small white orb and nodded. Abruptly Shae grabbed Sansa's wrist and yanked it a bit, Sansa looked into her friend's eyes, surprised by the force of her friend's grasp. Shae's pale face held no trace of the radiant-new-mother-smile, only a serious and pleading expression.
"Please don't ever let her come to know what I was. I have so little to give her, and nothing for her to remember me by. Swear she will never know!" Shae demanded in a fading voice. Sansa couldn't help it, her tears began to fall and she nodded.
"She will never know, I promise. She will know you loved her." Sansa croaked through her tears. With this promise Shae released Sansa and sank back gently into the pillows, her smile returning as she looked again upon her child, who was still feeding.
Shae bent and kissed her child once more, reaching up she traced the tiny and perfect ear and whispered, "I love you Pearl...who ever thought I'd be glad to have a child living in a world where there are dragons?"
Shae's head fell against the pillows, and her fingers fell away from Pearl's perfect ear. Her entire body relaxed and there was the soft sound of a final exhalation of breath. And Pearl cried, that tiny baby cry that they were all so happy to hear just moments ago now made Sansa's heart ache.
One of the healers came forward and picked up the baby gently, and another took up a sheet and moved to cover Shae. "Wait." Sansa commanded through her tears. She stood and looked down on her friend, then she bent and kissed Shae's forehead before saying, "Goodbye friend, you were always there for me...strong when I needed it, gentle and understanding when necessary. Your daughter will know what you meant to me, and I will be there for her as you were for me."
When Sansa had finished she gave a nod and the healer covered her friend with the white sheet. The healer holding Pearl approached Sansa and held the baby out towards her. Sansa's sorrow was so heavy upon her, and she feared anymore weight might make her collapse. And the baby was so tiny and delicate, Sansa didn't know how to hold a baby, she was afraid she might do something wrong. But the healer gave her a sad smile and began moving the baby from her arms to Sansa's. Then the woman squeezed Sansa's shoulder and said, "We will send a wet nurse at once." Then she and the healers left, their job now finished.
Sansa stood alone in the dark room, awkwardly holding the baby, tears streaming down her cheeks. Outside the thunder rumbled, and she could hear the heavy rain falling beyond the doors to the balcony. Sansa let the sounds of the storm wash over her as the child snuggled against her and fell asleep, and she wondered why miracles and tragedies so often went hand in hand. She had witnessed birth and death...was it really only mid morning?